Endangered-EGO

@Breakingthewall I'm very aware of that. The good thing is there hasn't been a new hitler type overreaction (yet). Imagine jews had flown planes into buildings and shot up huge crowds of people for the world to recognize Israel pre WW2. Hitler would have had more allies in the extermination of jews. The afghanistan war wasn't an overreaction in my opinion.

@Natasha I wasn't old enough to be traumatised 9/11 and too far overseas. But I remember the bataclan attacks in paris. To answer your questions: There's still anger and fear. Especially against muslims who are in SD stage blue and not compatible with western values. I'm so biased that my first intuition, if SD-blue-Islam says A, I'm gonna want to say B. I consider every muslim who wears a hijab or doesn't eat porc, bc of their beliefs (not bc of culture) SD stage blue. I currently live in belgium, and some neighborhoods in cities make you feel like you're in the middle east, which disgusts me. So you can say I'm pretty biased, but I am aware of my bias. Ofc when I talk to SD-blue-muslims about anything else than beliefs or ideology, that bias disappears.

@Stovo 2 things. When you look into the mirror for a while, you're going to experience mild hallucinations, your face is going to look really weird, for example my beard merges with all of my face and it looks so Alien. I've done this so often that jt doesn't freak me out. What also happens is the collapse of a "here-me" and a "there-me" in the mirror. That's what kind of freaks me out. Unfortunately the hallucinations are kind of distracting, but if you manage to switch your awareness from here-me to there-me back and forth once in a while it's going to collapse. Try to find out if you're in front or behind the mirror when you look at yourself. This happens to a lot of people, especially if they smoke weed.

@Matt23 The black abyss, would you call it your soul being ripped out of your Body? I would bet money on it being awakening and/or DP/DR, which kind of is the same thing. Also, awakening is a perceptual shift, you're doing the same stupid mistake I did. Trying to make sense lf it afterwards with the materialist paradigm. I also called this ego-death with a little bit of psychosis, but that's just a story. I would stop weed if I were you or make sure you never smoke too much and get that Awakening properly integrated. Also listen to jim newman, because I actually rebuilt a sense of self because I'm an idiot.

@Greengrass Yes I get that too. Once the fear goes away, the weird feeling of not being in your head goes away, and there's only a calm feeling left. If you have pain, or feel like you're going to pass out, don't stay alone, call someone and if it gets crazy, call an ambulance. When I have glimpses, I also always tell myself I've had a stroke or that this is not possible, or that someone roofied me because I feel differentl. I recommend you don't stay alone though in case something happens, better to be safe then sorry, and I am not a doctor so who knows. Also talking to a friend would calm you down.

Catholic friend sent me this, Wikipedia was no real help.

@Moksha Okay, that was my first impression too. But why is the angel taunting/bullying the guy.

@Matt23 Yes that's it, a mild form of DP/DR. Well, DP/DR stays for a long time if you have constant anxiety. Fortunately I didn't have anxiety (except during too much weed panic attack), but had ego deaths nearly every day. Still feels like dying though haha. Do you remember the first time it happened sober? For me the first time was the most fucking intense terrifying thing I could have imagined. The other ones were way less intense. Infinite time -->eternity-->full ego death --> everything is unreal --> no self, no other selves --> nothing exists outside of perception. I looked at my hand and it felt like viewing in from the perspective of an ant and me being a giant. Felt like a feverdream/bad trip. That was like 6 years ago, but ego came back and suffering got pretty bad. Now I want that back. What did Shinzen advise you to do? Did he do it on a streamed call on his website or in person? I would love to hear it if possible. He was the only one that could make sense of what I went through. I initially thought I had ego death, caused by psychosis, and not a real "Awakening". Now I know the Ox attacked me lmao. I am still terrified of changes in perception and weed, I was 16. Now I'm 23.

Fuck that's incredibly sad.

@Tim RRRR what I thought, I couldn't articulate it. I'm not sure it's just a metaphor, but then, "You can teach Zen with any book" @The0Self No, unfortunately it was a serious question, because I kind of relate to that picture. ----------------------------------------------------------- I have encountered bad things from my teenage years to now, that I often told myself that "God is taunting/teasing me with a bad sense of humor". What made it so bad was that I couldn't even imagine how bad and crazy things could get, and then somehow they got worse, as if god was a creative torturer. SPOILER ALERT from "The good place"-series As if I was in the bad place from the series "the good place". And if that was a drama and not a comedy. I still have subconscious beliefs about reality being hostile, even though I'm not terrified of tommorow anymore.

@Matt23 Yes, If you continue, smoke too much, you'll get a panic attack, and a one pointedness of mind on that thing you're afraid of, it will be followed by DP/DR for a few months. I've been through it and many other people too. Don't do it though, you're not gonna have a good time. It's called the pit of the void and enlightenments evil twin for a reason.

@Slifon nofap, this increases the chance of the Kundalini energy catching fire during meditation. If you're able to fully surrender during meditation and once the pointy orgasm inthe spine shows up, focus on it, this might awaken it. Describe the energy of the lsd trip pls exactly how it moved how it felt etc. I have yet to meet anyone who awakened Kundalini and didn't have any symptoms. Kryias (involuntary movements) are the most common. And a lot of heat. Very bad cases of Kundalini awakenings can lead to psychosis or DP/DR.

@Leo Gura Interesting... I would love to see you interview Shinzen. I bet he would gladly say yes.

@Leo Gura Not a single known buddhist or vipassana teacher has achieved God realisation? Who of the modern teachers do you assume has realised God? Peter ralston, adyashanti, shinzen young, shunyamurti, Jim Newman, sadhguru?

@Jannes Better than learning a lot of theory, you probably should find a fully enlightened teacher who you can ask questions to, because you're going to dothings wrong, things are gonna happen and you're going to want to know what's happening. As far as I am concerned the search for enlightenment is traps traps traps traps traps. When I have questions for practice I ask in shinzen youngs mindfullness forum. When I have a question about enlightenment/metaphysics I just ask it here.

Damn the live chat is very dismissive. I thought the theories-of-everything people would be open minded enough for this conversation. Especially those who watch it live.

How was it? @Leo Gura I'm so excited to listen to it!

+++++ If you go ask a professor: "Is the word duck the same thing as a duck?" He's gonna say: "Of course not, I'm not a fucking idiot" But then in practice he's going to do his math formula an say that reality is mathematics. ++++++ This is so simple, so clear, but the most intelligent people get lost in the map and not the territory. I burst out laughing, because of Leo's ranting. Petition for Leo to always use ducks for his metaphors and analogies. Energy-ducks one was good too.

@Synchronicity Doesn't matter, they are too much into the symbols. I've been a materialist my whole life, I can tell you that atoms bouncing around, time starting with the big bang and space etc. And consciousness being emergent from electricity in the brain feels very very true. Listen to Curt's podcast with Leo.

@VeganAwake Okay, so everything you say is a pointer that has no prescription for or against practice? It's just a pointer right, there's nothing more to that than read it, get confused and continue to think about "how to I get there" even though it's a pointless chase. I feel like a lot of radical nondualists are like a mysterious oracles you just poke and it gives you another pointer? *Poke*

@Flowerfaeiry I meant I differentiate the raw perception from the thought as much as I can, and observe both. For example I have thoughts about what's inside a building, even though I am only perceiving the outside. Like from the minds eye. With people I differentiate perceiving people/bodies from the thoughts about a conscious-agent-soul looking at me. Maybe we're doing the same thing but phrased it differently?

@Leo Gura hahahahahaha got me good.

@Flowerfaeiry Why would you do that? This won't do/help anything. What I tend to do, is when I view a building I notice the imagination about the building while looking at the building. Or when I am with people I inquire into thoughts about there being people looking at "me". I'm also mot sure this is going to lead Somewhere, but it's showing me how my thoughts construct reality.

@VeganAwake How much does one need to end the chase? Just conceptually or also stop chasing regular day to day pleasures and distractions?

@LastThursday lmao thanks for reminding me of my profile-picture! @Scholar I probably need to observe the mind how it makes sense of reality NOW, because what the mind does is it remembers glimpses, nothingness etc. So it creates a new worldview integrating that glimpse that is not present now, but the respresentation of truth I witnessed in the path is only a Representation of it now, so it can't be TRUE in the now. One more pointer please, I like where this is going.