Endangered-EGO

Don't lose yourself in that pedophilia nonsense. Raping or sexually assaulting children causes suffering. You don't want that, and children don't want that. If you're able to love atrocities than fine, but it doesn't mean it's good. Reading things like that triggers alarms. Love the trauma, love the sadness, love the suffering if you're able and want to, but it's not something you want to cause!

@Ilan Don't take psychedelics, if you have side effects from antipsychotics, talk about it to the psychiatrist. Psychedelics can worsen your situation, and your not stable. Especially if you're not stable psychedelics are going to worsen psychosis and schizophrenia. Leo said it. If you have troubles with psyche, don't take psychedelics. If you want to talk about awakening, ask a teacher who is familiar with what you're going through. Every teacher is going to tell you;"Keep taking your medication and do this and that". No stupid things! No spiritual or physical suicide!

@Leo Gura I hope you told him he is "NOT A HUMAN".

@Consilience Yes, but only towards being, expansion and contraction doesn't come and go from 0 to 0. Its a only absense of mind/thought. Is this similar to shinzen Young's noting "gone"?

@Raptorsin7 Yes, shinzen Young was a big help for that. He uses the phrase divide and conquer. Untagnle and be free. Instead of coping by hiding and supression or grasping he tells people to go closer to the experience. If it wasn't for meditation I probably would have already killed myself or ended up in psychiatry. But who knows tbh. Some "types" of suffering once fully experienced in the entire body disappeared I remember despair being in my entire fucking body, the last time it occured.

@Leo Gura This is a good thing. The first thought that comes up, might indicate your underlying beliefs. Rupert spira said exactly that. Curts questions made him aware of things he didn't know he thought to be true.

@Windappreciator @Vynce Monday.

@Leo Gura This sounds like he got what you pointed to. A good teacher knows how to point towards it by getting what the students question. Do you believe you could continue to point without structure, for people who are as focused on the subject as Curt?

@Leo Gura @Leo Gura Was it insightful for you? Impressed by the questions? He usually digs deep.

I gues they wouldn't have talked 6 hours and continue afterwards if it didn't go well. Maybe the rest is for QnAs I guess.

@Tim R Damn, I want that AI. They can make so much money, by spamming the internet with AI content. But I guess if you wrote: "We're in hell, Satan is torturing me with deception" You'd find some weird shit.

I was making a parody of antivaxx people, I carified that in the end of the post. Come on "my dog got covid and didn't complain about any symptoms" ? I was just showing how they make sense of their nonsense and use everything to fortify their beliefs about the current situation.

@Raptorsin7 Interesting, do you have someone who helps you assess your situation or steps?

@TrippyMindSubstance Okay, I like how you put that. My problem is I haven't been able to function work properly since my burnout in 2019/2020. The more I tried, the harder it got. I am barely able to work 2hours a day, and those hours are killing me. This of course leads to shame and guilt. I felt actually pretty good right before lockdown 2020, but since then I spent about every hour in isolation. Changing circumstances might make me happy, but I don't want happiness when I don't experience it. I'm obsessed with problem solving. I actually use spirituality as an escape because I fell down so hard and haven't been able to get up and stay up yet. The last years were only failures and failures, this obviously lead to despair and a lack of motivation for anything. So you're saying I should use spirituality as a means to function and get up again first?

@Nos7algiK If it's not what I think it is, then he should ignore everything I wrote. I made that clear. It doesn't matter if mental illness has something to do with it, I just mentioned it because they go through the same. I have no reason to keep that information for myself.

@Johnny Galt That's what they want you to believe. Big pharma makes money. I know 24 people who died or nearly died from the vaccine and nobody talked about it. My dog got covid and didn't complain about any symptoms. Also I made 2 covid tests, one was negative and one was positive. So it's a hoax. The media and government are lying, they always lied and don't know the secrets of wim hoff breathing that cure any disease. And there are plenty of other scientist that have a different opinion. --------------------- That was the antivaxx defense. You cannot explain reason, epistemology and the scientific method to people who went to school for 15 years and still don't approach rationality, logic etc. I just tell them to trust the intelligent people or to ask their doctors.

@Windappreciator I never said it was. I just said it also occures to psychotic and paranoid schizophrenics. Does the rest of the description fit your perception?

@RMQualtrough I'm gonna stop you there. Why do you think ego-death is called death. No amount of alcohol that's not literally going to kill you feels like death. Ego-death the kind I remember best, feels like everything dies. Everybody and everything eternally is dead.

@Nos7algiK No, if I know what he's talking about, this thing is going to lead him through the worst bad trip he could ever imagine. That's common for people who go through awakenings too fast and People who suffer from weed induced psychosis/schizopschizophrenia.

@Windappreciator Does it feel rotten and sick in the chest area? And has real physical effects? Beating you to the ground? If not, then stop reading. Buddhist have a word for it, that's one of the things that come up when going from the 3rd to the 4th jhana. I'm not familiar enough to find the name for that occurence. I needed 5 years to escape from it, always distracting until I went through it. Then it just came, I focused on it as much as possible, and that dumb fucking shit just disappeared. No fucking thing happened, I was expecting fireworks and Satan and shit, but it came, my heart beat fast, went away. Then I just sat there and after a while I was just into the 4th jhana for a while. Nothing happened, nothing changed. I needed to convince myself multiple times to push through it and for dozens of times I backed out when my heart beat fast. But there's nothing. Nothing will happen, this is just some random shit that has no substance. I was only afraid of what that would lead to, but it's just that dishusting feeling and fear, nothing underneath it.

@KennedyCarter Feel free to write down the answers to the questions you didn't know you had. "And a chicken Mcnuggets, fries with a diet coke please."

I just had a terrifying second of "nonself..." In front of the mirror. Just looked into it for a while and boom. My inner sense of self recognised itself with the reflection of my head until I was not the reflection and not the subject anymore. I tried to reproduce it but couldn't. I couldn't tell you what I exactly did. Maybe you can help, do you know any self-inquiry methods in front of the mirror. I would like to be able to maintain that state. But couldn't reproduce it. Maybe I'm gonna meditate in front of the mirror now, I'm not sure what to do with awareness though. I'm very distracted by the reflection of my face changing color/form etc too.

I'm sure a Gaddafi or Sadam Hussein would survive. Livestreaming dozens of executions every day. Also, if there's enough money, communist authoritarianism and stalinism would survive in the cities.

@Nos7algiK So no practice at all? What should I do if I have time? @mw711 Well he's articulate and has good pointers, maybe we can both learn from him i guess.

@Nos7algiK Okay, let's say I take a chair and just sit in front of the mirror and "rest" my awareness. Just letting it do whatever it feels attracted to do. This is surrender, not Meditation and not anti-meditation. Is this what you're pointing towards?