Amandine

Hahaha, you gotta laugh, people are funny, love it!

Day 47: Today's weight: 61.1 (134.4 lbs) Weight loss so far after 44 days: 1.1 kg (2.4 lbs) ? Weight loss to go: 6.1 kgs (13.4 lbs) left to go Starting weight: 62.2 kgs (136.8 lbs) Goal weight: 55 kgs (121 lbs) Total weight to lose: 7.2 kgs (15.8 lbs) Daily limit: 1,600 calories Weight loss rate: 1 lb a week Date goal weight: end April Today I'm gonna integrate an 18:6 Intermittant fast 18 hours fast) (meals in 6-hour slot between 7.15am and 1.15pm). * 7.15am Pre work-out coffee 87c Capuccino 87 * Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals * 9am Breakfast (muesli) 322c 10g organic unsalted cashew nuts (623) 62 + 10g Bjorg organic sugarfree muesli (367) 36 + 10g organic sugar-reduced granola (437) 43 + 10g organic oatbran (359) 35 + 5g organic chia seeds (449) 22 + 100g organic fresh forest fruits (55) 55 + 150g organic soy milk (46) 69 Total cals so far today: 87+322=409c * 12.30pm Lunch (salad) 647c 100g Iceberg lettuce (17) 17 + 50g tomato (18) 9 + 50g bell pepper (20) 10 + 50g cucumber (14) 7 + 25g onion (40) 10 + 10g organic mayo (661) 66 + 5g organic mustard (245) 12 + 1g organic olive oil (900) 9 + 74g organic gluten-free bread (270) 199 + 10g organic cheese (400) 40 + 5g organic chorizo (498) 49 + 1g Nori algae sheets (300) 3 + 2g organic cripsy onions (590) 11 + 5g mixed organic seeds and nuts*** (flax, hemp, pumpkin, hazelnuts) 30c + 325g organic orange juice (54) 175 *** flax seeds 534+pumpkin seeds 446+hemp seeds 566+hazelnut 628(10g of each (40g)=53+44+56+62=215/7 days=30c for about 5g mix a day Total cals so far today: 409+647=1,056c 544c left for the rest of the day * 1pm Dessert 544c 1 cafe au lait 40 + 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 307 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 That last meal will be followed by 18 hours of fasting. Total cals so far today: 1,056+544=1,600c ? Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals ? Accomplished today: ? * had 8 hours sleep * respected my calorie limit of 1,600 cals ??? * did cardio exercise * did 20' do-nothing meditation * read daily chapter from "As a man thinketh" * said daily self-love affirmations * had no aperitifs * did Wellbox face and body * practiced mindful eating and intermittant fasting * finished reading "The Art of Loving" by Erich Fromm * started reading "The Art of Listening" by Erich Fromm * kept daily "time-keeping journal and "feelings" journal * continued working on my Digital Hoarding Disorder (and resisting as much as possible bookmarking and saving stuff in computer files to read for "tomorrow") * continued with the decluttering by putting stuff on vinted for sale, very time-consuming

Day 46: Today's weight: 61.6 (135.5 lbs) Weight loss so far after 44 days: 0.6 kg (1.3 lbs) ? Weight loss to go: 6.6 kgs (14.5 lbs) left to go Starting weight: 62.2 kgs (136.8 lbs) Goal weight: 55 kgs (121 lbs) Total weight to lose: 7.2 kgs (15.8 lbs) Daily limit: 1,600 calories Weight loss rate: 1 lb a week Date goal weight: end April Today I'm gonna integrate an 18:6 Intermittant fast 18 hours fast) (meals in 6-hour slot between 7.15am and 1.15pm). * 7.15am Pre work-out coffee 87c Capuccino 87 * Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals * 9.30am Breakfast (muesli) 322c 10g organic unsalted cashew nuts (623) 62 + 10g Bjorg organic sugarfree muesli (367) 36 + 10g organic sugar-reduced granola (437) 43 + 10g organic oatbran (359) 35 + 5g organic chia seeds (449) 22 + 100g organic fresh forest fruits (55) 55 + 150g organic soy milk (46) 69 Total cals so far today: 87+322=409c * 12.30pm Lunch (salad) 637c 100g Iceberg lettuce (17) 17 + 50g tomato (18) 9 + 50g bell pepper (20) 10 + 50g cucumber (14) 7 + 25g onion (40) 10 + 10g organic mayo (661) 66 + 10g organic mustard (245) 24 + 1g organic olive oil (900) 9 + 78g organic gluten-free bread (270) 210 + 12g organic cheese (360) 43 + 2g organic bacon (457) 9 + 3g sun-dried tomatoes (138) 4 + 1g Nori algae sheets (300) 3 + 2g organic cripsy onions (590) 11 + 5g mixed organic seeds and nuts*** (flax, hemp, pumpkin, hazelnuts) 30c + 325g organic orange juice (54) 175 *** flax seeds 534+pumpkin seeds 446+hemp seeds 566+hazelnut 628(10g of each (40g)=53+44+56+62=215/7 days=30c for about 5g mix a day Total cals so far today: 409+637=1,046c 565c left for the rest of the day * 1pm Dessert 544c 1 cafe au lait 40 + 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 307 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 That last meal will be followed by 18 hours of fasting. Total cals so far today: 1,046+544=1,590c ? Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals ? Accomplished today: ? * had 8 hours sleep * respected my calorie limit of 1,600 cals * did cardio exercise * did 20' do-nothing meditation * read daily chapter from "As a man thinketh" * said daily self-love affirmations * had no aperitifs * did Wellbox face and body * practiced mindful eating * continued reading "The Art of Loving" by Erich Fromm * kept daily "time-keeping journal and "feelings" journal * continued working on my Digital Hoarding Disorder (and resisting as much as possible bookmarking and saving stuff in computer files to read for "tomorrow") * continued with the decluttering by putting stuff on vinted for sale, very time-consuming * had all-clear from Optician's that my retina is back to normal and fully healed ?

Thank you @kieranperez amazing journey, inspiring story, beautifully written, I wish you well, may you always listen to your heart. ? Goodbye my friend ?

Ok, so maybe I was a bit hasty wanting to finish this journal the other day and pack it all in. I think it best I continue as I'll only regret not making the effort to go the whole hog. So back to my original ideal 55kg (120 lb) target weight goal, I'll still keep my end April goal as I think it's still achievable, So, back on track, I've got 2 1/2 months left (11 weeks, 75 days) to lose about 6 kgs (13 lbs), which still means about a lb-a-week weight loss, completely doable. I'll start a new thread Monday to start anew fresh. I reckon I'll weigh about 61kgs on the scales Monday when I weigh myself again next). Hope I haven't put too much back on after this last week off from any dieting. I carried on the same breakfast and tea-time wise, but had more calories than usual for lunch this last week, and also we went out for a St Valentine's meal. I also burned 300 calories on my indoor bike every day, carried on with the Intermittent Fasting idea on the whole and ate healthily. Day 44 & 45: Today's weight: ? (will weigh myself Monday) Weight loss so far after 44 days: ? kg (? lbs) ? Starting weight: 62.2 kgs (136.8 lbs) Goal weight: 55 kgs (121 lbs) Total weight to lose: 7.2 kgs (15.8 lbs) Daily limit: 1,600 calories Weight loss rate: 1 lb a week Date goal weight: end April This weekend I'll finish off the stuff I've already cooked (no idea of their calories and start counting again from Monday). Accomplished today: ? * 8 hours sleep * 20' do-nothing meditation * daily reading from "As a man thinketh" * daily self-love affirmations * no aperitifs or alcohol * mindful eating * cardio exercise* * finished reading "Hands of Light" * started reading "The Art of Loving" by Erich Fromm * continuing working on my Digital Hoarding Disorder (and resisting as much as possible bookmarking and saving stuff in computer files to read for "tomorrow")

This Be The Verse BY PHILIP LARKIN They fuck you up, your mum and dad. They may not mean to, but they do. They fill you with the faults they had And add some extra, just for you. But they were fucked up in their turn By fools in old-style hats and coats, Who half the time were soppy-stern And half at one another’s throats. Man hands on misery to man. It deepens like a coastal shelf. Get out as early as you can, And don’t have any kids yourself.

I used to put this on the juke box all the time in the bar at Uni, probs drove everyone mad Love Chet, cheers @GGG ?

Love Whitney's voice and the lyrics on this one but especially the message ... Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all I believe the children are our are future Teach them well and let them lead the way Show them all the beauty they possess inside Give them a sense of pride to make it easier Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be Everybody searching for a hero People need someone to look up to I never found anyone who fulfill my needs A lonely place to be And so I learned to depend on me I decided long ago Never to walk in anyone's shadows If I fail, if I succeed At least I'll live as I believe No matter what they take from me They can't take away my dignity Because the greatest Love of all is happening to me I found the greatest Love of all inside of me The greatest love of all Is easy to achieve Learning to love yourself It is the greatest love of all

What's happened to that Zzenn guy, he left youtube and took all his videos with him, Unspirituality RIP lol?

The Shocking Truth about Meditation:Most People Get This Wrong (eric ho, youtube video) video's main points = meditation is about nothingness your mind at that moment clears everything and thinks about nothing a lot of people use what they call meditation to get rid of stress today but when you're trying to think about nothing and you're stressed, it's virtually impossible to get into nothingness so it's your worst time to get into that meditative state the world looks at meditation as a process for an outcome but in actual fact meditation is the outcome not the process a lot of people use meditation as a process to try and de-stress but in fact meditation is the outcome if you get to that place of bliss and connection with the divine it's absolutely amazing how do we actually practice meditation and when should we practice it ? you practice it when your mind is most calm when you are most at peace once you've calmed the mind then you practice meditation keep your hands in receiving mode meaning palms facing up keep your spine comfortably erect this is your channel the spine starts from what we call the base chakra down on the bottom all the way up the spine to the top towards the crown chakra see this as your channel from the earth towards the rest of the universe so to connect to the divine this is your channel close your eyes, take a slow gentle deep breath in and out, in and out and when you're breathing make sure it's the deep abdominal breathing in and out in through your nose out through your mouth just breathe and while you're breathing what will naturally happen is your senses will connect to things and start a dialogue if I say close your eyes think about nothing it's likely that you're gonna think about something do not try to think about nothing because when you do you think about something it's like if I say don't think of the purple elephant you'll have the purple elephant going on in your head so don't try to not think about anything instead what you want to do is practice witnessing what does that mean? why does your mind become cluttered ? it only becomes cluttered when different dialogue starts and dialogue only starts from your sensory so for example you can close your eyes, yeah okay don't think about anything then you think oh the light maybe if I turned it off it would be better you're sensing light that's why you start dialogue the next thing is oh car door closes, maybe somebody's outside has somebody arrived? you sense you hear something you feel something you feel cold you feel warm you feel the sun rising all of these senses kicks off a dialogue so how do we practice meditation and getting into nothingness? very simple you practice witnessing witness sound, allow it to pass car door, allow it to pass movement, allow it to pass without asking what is the movement? who is the movement? because the moment we allow the sequence to kick off we're gonna go on forever our mind is very powerful like that, it keeps connecting so instead, just witness and as a rule of thumb for beginners getting into meditation what I recommend you it's just practice one minute two minutes a day don't go over the top trying to get into ten minute half an hour meditation why? because then it will counter it will do the opposite you will get so frustrated and annoyed that you're not doing it right and you're like oh I'm still thinking about something or I'm starting some dialog then you get frustrated and it does the opposite to meditation so start small work your way up from 30 seconds to a minute and you can practice it throughout the day it doesn't just have to be in the morning even if you're sitting on the train even if you're sitting at work whenever you're doing different things just practice just breathing and allow your sensory just to witness everything that's passing by what will happen is you will get through days and through months more and more things can pass by and then you'll be able to allow them to pass by one by one and actually witness and when you get into that part of peace which is the connectivity points to the divine to the universe what will actually happen is you will get to that point when you get to oneness with the divine that place of bliss where you see everything but do not hold that expectation to wanting to get there because if you do with that expectation you will keep getting disappointment so instead just focus on nothingness that's all just focus on witnessing practice and some of you it may even take months it may even take yours some of you may even take decades to actually finally get into that place of bliss but when you do you will start understanding and you start witnessing enlightenment and actually this whole out-of-body experience when you shift your consciousness once and for all

Special mention for Stan Getz. And chilling on a Friday afternoon with Chet Baker. All these 3 geniuses were struggling with heroin addiction at some point.

Day 36: Today's weight: 59.7 (131.3 lbs) Weight loss so far after 35 days: 2.5 kg (5.5 lbs) ? Bilan : I'm actually happy with my body 5 lbs less, I don't feel I need to go to 120 lbs, I'm perfectly ok as I am, I no l longer want to be skinny skinny. End of journal. Today I'm gonna integrate an 18:6 Intermittant fast 89 hours fast) (meals in 6-hour slot between 7.30am and 1.30pm). * 7.30am Pre work-out coffee 87c Capuccino 87 * Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals * 9am Breakfast (muesli) 322c 10g organic unsalted cashew nuts (623) 62 + 10g Bjorg organic sugarfree muesli (367) 36 + 10g organic sugar-reduced granola (437) 43 + 10g organic oatbran (359) 35 + 5g organic chia seeds (449) 22 + 100g organic fresh forest fruits (55) 55 + 150g organic soy milk (46) 69 Total cals so far today: 87c+322=409c * 12.15pm Lunch (crostini) 638c 100 g lettuce (17) 17 + 5g organic mayo (661) 33 + 2g mustard (245) 6 + 100g organic sourdough bread (260) 260 + 1g organic olive oil (900) 9 + 150g tom/onion (45) 67 + 15g organic cheddar (400) 60 + 2g crispy fried onions (590) 11 + 140g sharon fruit (125) 175 Total cals so far today: 409+638=1,047c 553c left for the rest of the day * 12.45pm Dessert 544c 1 cafe au lait 40 + 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 307 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 That last meal will be followed by 18 hours of fasting. Total cals so far today: 1,047+544=1,591c ? Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals ? Accomplished today: ? * 8 hours sleep * 20' do-nothing meditation * daily reading from "As a man thinketh" * daily self-love affirmations * no aperitifs or alcohol * Wellbox face and body * mindful eating * cardio exercise * reading Barbara Brennan's "Hands of Light" * daily "time-keeping journal and "feelings" journal * continuing working on my Digital Hoarding Disorder (and resisting as much as possible bookmarking and saving stuff in computer files to read for "tomorrow") * continuing with the decluttering by putting stuff on vinted for sale, very time-consuming

Day 35: Today's weight: ? (didn't weigh-in) Weight loss so far after 26 days: 2.5 kg (5.5 lbs) ? on target Weight loss to go: 4.7 kgs (10.3 lbs) left to go Starting weight: 62.2 kgs (136.8 lbs) Goal weight: 55 kgs (121 lbs) Total weight to lose: 7.2 kgs (15.8 lbs) Daily limit: 1,600 calories Weight loss rate: 1 lb a week Date goal weight: end April Today I'm gonna integrate a 19:5 Intermittant fast (19 hours fast) (meals in 5-hour slot between 8am and 1pm). * 8 Pre work-out coffee 87c Capuccino 87 * Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals * 9am Breakfast (muesli) 333c 10g organic unsalted cashew nuts (623) 62 + 10g Bjorg organic sugarfree muesli (367) 36 + 10g organic sugar-reduced granola (437) 43 + 10g organic oatbran (359) 35 + 5g organic chia seeds (449) 22 + 100g organic fresh forest fruits (55) 55 + 175g organic soy milk (46) 80 Total cals so far today: 87c+333=420c * 12.15pm Lunch (crostini) 828c 100 g lettuce (17) 17 + 5g organic mayo (661) 33 + 2g mustard (245) 6 + 100g organic sourdough bread (260) 260 + 2g organic olive oil (900) 18 + 200g tom/onion (45) 90 + 17g organic cheddar (400) 68 + 10g streaky bacon (457) 45 + 5g crispy fried onions (590) 29 + 210g sharon fruit (125) 262 Recipe tom/onion= 415g onions (40) 166 + 5g organic olive oil (900) 45 + 400g tinnned tomatoes (26) 104 = 315c/700g = 0,45c/g (45c/100g) Total cals so far today: 420+828=1,248c 352c left for the rest of the day * 12.45pm Dessert 851c 1 cafe au lait 40 + 2 x 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 614 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 That last meal will be followed by 19 hours of fasting. Total cals so far today: 1,248+851=2,099c (lost the plot today) Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals ? Accomplished today: ? * 8 hours sleep * 20' do-nothing meditation * daily reading from "As a man thinketh" * daily self-love affirmations * no aperitifs * Wellbox face and body * mindful eating * cardio exercise * finished reading P.D. Ouspensky's "Conscience: the Search for Truth" * daily "time-keeping journal and "feelings" journal * continuing working on my Digital Hoarding Disorder (and resisting as much as possible bookmarking and saving stuff in computer files to read for "tomorrow" which of course never frigging comes) * continuing with the decluttering by putting stuff on vinted for sale, very time-consuming

Day 34: Today's weight: ? (didn't weigh-in) Weight loss so far after 26 days: 2.5 kg (5.5 lbs) ? on target Weight loss to go: 4.7 kgs (10.3 lbs) left to go Starting weight: 62.2 kgs (136.8 lbs) Goal weight: 55 kgs (121 lbs) Total weight to lose: 7.2 kgs (15.8 lbs) Daily limit: 1,600 calories Weight loss rate: 1 lb a week Date goal weight: end April Today I'm gonna integrate a 18:6 Intermittant fast (18 hours fast) (meals in 6-hour slot between 7.30am and 1.30pm). * 7.30 Pre work-out coffee 87c Capuccino 87 * Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals * 9am Breakfast (muesli) 322c 10g organic unsalted cashew nuts (623) 62 + 10g Bjorg organic sugarfree muesli (367) 36 + 10g organic sugar-reduced granola (437) 43 + 10g organic oatbran (359) 35 + 5g organic chia seeds (449) 22 + 100g organic fresh forest fruits (55) 55 + 150g organic soy milk (46) 69 Total cals so far today: 87c+322=409c * 12.30pm Lunch (crostini) 650c 100 g lettuce (17) 17 + 7g organic mayo (661) 46 + 100g organic sourdough bread (252) 252 + 2g organic olive oil (900) 18 +200g tom/onion (41) 82 + 15g organic cheddar (400) 60 + 140g sharon fruit (125) 175 Total cals so far today: 409+650=1,059c 541c left for the rest of the day * 1.15pm Dessert 544c 1 cafe au lait 40 + 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 307 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 That last meal will be followed by 18 hours of fasting. Total cals so far today: 1,059+544=1,603c ? Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals ? Accomplished today: ? * 8 hours sleep * respected calories * 20' do-nothing meditation * daily reading from "As a man thinketh" * daily self-love affirmations * no aperitifs * mindful eating * cardio exercise * continued reading P.D. Ouspensky's "Conscience: the Search for Truth" * daily "time-keeping journal and "feelings" journal * continuined dealing with my Digital Hoarding Disorder and resisting as much as possible bookmarking and saving stuff in computer files to read for "tomorrow" * continued decluttering by putting stuff on vinted for sale

I don't have words for him Great selection @Zigzag Idiot thank you ? Overjoyed is one of my top top tops, to me it's one of the most beautiful songs ever, ha you beat me to that one! Ebony and ivory live together in perfect harmony Side by side on my piano keyboard, oh Lord, why don't we? We all know that people are the same whereever you go There is good and bad in ev'ryone We learn to live, when we learn to give Each other what we need to survive, together alive Ebony and ivory live together in perfect harmony Side by side on my piano keyboard, oh Lord why don't we? Ebony, ivory, living in perfect harmony Ebony, ivory, ooh We all know that people are the same whereever you go There is good and bad in ev'ryone We learn to live, when we learn to give Each other what we need to survive, together alive Ebony and ivory live together in perfect harmony Side by side on my piano keyboard, oh Lord…

Nobody does it better Makes me feel sad for the rest Nobody does it half as good as you Baby, you're the best I wasn't lookin' but somehow you found me It tried to hide from your love light But like heaven above me The spy who loved me Is keepin' all my secrets safe tonight And nobody does it better Though sometimes I wish someone could Nobody does it quite the way you do Why'd you have to be so good? The way that you hold me Whenever you hold me There's some kind of magic inside you That keeps me from runnin' But just keep it comin'

And this one not warm the cockles of the heart? Seize ... upon the moment of long ago One breath away and there you will be So young and carefree again you will see That place in time So gold Steal ... away into that way back when You thought that all would last forever But like the weather nothing can ever And be in time Stay gold But can it be ... when we can see So vividly a memory And yes you say so must the day To fade away And leave a ray of sun So gold Life ... is but a twinkling of an eye Yet filled with sorrow and compassion Though not imagined all things that happen Will age too old Though gold

How can this one not cheer the soul? I bring joy, and I can take you through, All those days when people seem to get to you. I bring joy, and I come here to you. I bring life, and I can take you where You can see, and feel, and breathe, and touch the air. I bring life and I can take you there. Feelings inside that we keep Out of sight and out of reach Bring us to the things we seek Take your time, remember when you do There are days when people feel the same as you. I bring time, and I can take you through

This one has got me dancing right now : The question is how does she sing and smile at the same time? Love Love will keep us together Think of me babe, whenever Some sweet-talking girl comes along, singing her song Don't mess around, you've just got to be strong, just stop 'Cause I really love you, stop I'll be thinking of you Look in my heart and let love keep us together You You belong to me now Ain't gonna set you free now When those girl start hanging around talking me down Hear with your heart and you won't hear a sound, just stop (stop) 'Cause I really love you, stop (stop) I'll be thinking of you Look in my heart and let love keep us together Whatever Young and beautiful But someday your looks will be gone When the others turn you off Who'll be turning you on?

Day 33: Today's weight: ? (didn't weigh-in) Weight loss so far after 26 days: 2.5 kg (5.5 lbs) ? on target Weight loss to go: 4.7 kgs (10.3 lbs) left to go Starting weight: 62.2 kgs (136.8 lbs) Goal weight: 55 kgs (121 lbs) Total weight to lose: 7.2 kgs (15.8 lbs) Daily limit: 1,600 calories Weight loss rate: 1 lb a week Date goal weight: end April Today I'm gonna integrate a 17:7 Intermittant fast (17 hours fast) (meals between 7.30am and 2.30pm). * 7.30 Pre work-out coffee 87c Capuccino 87 * Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals * 9am Breakfast (muesli) 322c 10g organic unsalted cashew nuts (623) 62 + 10g Bjorg organic sugarfree muesli (367) 36 + 10g organic sugar-reduced granola (437) 43 + 10g organic oatbran (359) 35 + 5g organic chia seeds (449) 22 + 100g organic fresh forest fruits (55) 55 + 150g organic soy milk (46) 69 Total cals so far today: 87c+322=409c * 1.15pm Lunch (croque monsieur salad) 578c 20 g avocado (160) 32 + 5g mayo (661) 33 + 50g tomato (18) 9 + 25g bell pepper (20) 5 + 25g onion (40) 10 + 1g olive oil (900) 9 + 74g wholemeal bread (270) 199 + 15g organic cheddar (400) 60 + 7g organic chorizo (498) 34 + 5g mustard (245) 12 + 140g sharon fruit (125) 175 Total cals so far today: 409+578=987c 613c left for the rest of the day * 2.15pm Dessert 664c 2 latte macchiatto 160 + 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 307 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 Total cals so far today: 987c+664=1,651c That last meal will be followed by 17 hours of fasting. Zut! Needed some stress relief, so frustrated feeling like I've got nothing done today so helped myself to a second 'dessert/tea-time'. * 5pm Dessert 584c 1 latte macchiatto 80 + 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 307 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 Total cals so far today: 1,651+584=2,235c ? Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals ? Accomplished today: ? * 8 hours sleep * respected calories * 20' do-nothing meditation * daily reading from "As a man thinketh" * daily self-love affirmations * no aperitifs * mindful eating * cardio exercise * reading P.D. Ouspensky's "Conscience: the Search for Truth" * daily "time-keeping journal and "feelings" journal * continuining dealing with my Digital Hoarding Disorder and resisting as much as possible bookmarking and saving stuff in computer files to read for "tomorrow"

Day 32: Today's weight: ? (didn't weigh-in) Weight loss so far after 26 days: 2.5 kg (5.5 lbs) ? on target Weight loss to go: 4.7 kgs (10.3 lbs) left to go Starting weight: 62.2 kgs (136.8 lbs) Goal weight: 55 kgs (121 lbs) Total weight to lose: 7.2 kgs (15.8 lbs) Daily limit: 1,600 calories Weight loss rate: 1 lb a week Date goal weight: end April Today I'm gonna integrate a 17:7 Intermittant fast (17 hours fast) (meals between 7.30am and 2.30pm). * 7.30 Pre work-out coffee 87c Capuccino 87 * Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals * 10.30am? Breakfast (muesli) 322c 10g organic unsalted cashew nuts (623) 62 + 10g Bjorg organic sugarfree muesli (367) 36 + 10g organic sugar-reduced granola (437) 43 + 10g organic oatbran (359) 35 + 5g organic chia seeds (449) 22 + 100g organic fresh forest fruits (55) 55 + 150g organic soy milk (46) 69 Total cals so far today: 87c+322=409c * 1.15pm Lunch (croque monsieur salad) 578c (+ tasted a tiny bit of duck magret/green beans/buckwheat for hubby checking cooking perfection) 20 g avocado (160) 32 + 5g mayo (661) 33 + 50g tomato (18) 9 + 25g bell pepper (20) 5 + 25g onion (40) 10 + 1g olive oil (900) 9 + 74g wholemeal bread (270) 199 + 15g organic cheddar (400) 60 + 7g organic chorizo (498) 34 + 5g mustard (245) 12 + 140g sharon fruit (125) 175 Total cals so far today: 409+578=987c 613c left for the rest of the day * 2.15pm Dessert 584c 1 latte macchiatto 80 + 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 307 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 That last meal will be followed by 17 hours of fasting. Total cals so far today: 987c+584=1,571c (+ tasted tiny bit of hubby's duck magret/veggies/cereals to check cooking perfection) ? Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals ? Accomplished today: ? * 8 hours sleep * respected calories * 20' do-nothing meditation * daily reading from "As a man thinketh" * daily self-love affirmations * no aperitifs * mindful eating * cardio exercise * continuing some self-reflection exercises from self-help co-dependency book * daily "time-keeping journal and "feelings" journal * continuining dealing with my Digital Hoarding Disorder and resisting as much as possible bookmarking and saving stuff in computer files to read for "tomorrow" * getting as much stuff on Vinted for sale (decluttering). The aim is first to get everything photographed and tidied away (with notes where things are so I can find them easily when the buyer comes).

Day 31: Day off today. Pancake day. + All day putting stuff on Vinted for sale. Decluttering big time. Stress, lol. Did usual bike. Basically morning meal same as usual (coffee and muesli), lunch 1 1/2croque monsieur with lettuce/mayo and a generous portion of cheese, followed by a couple of big sharon fruits, tea-time snack was another coffee with 1 1/2 lemon bars, and 1 2/3 cookies, and about a half liter of fresh organic orange juice, and dinner was steamed leeks with creme fraiche. Finally I didn't get round to making the pancakes, due to dealing with the Vinted stuff. Anyways, back on track tomorrow calorie-wise, Idk but reckon I've consumed over 2,000 cals today.

Day 30: Today's weight: ? (didn't weigh-in) Weight loss so far after 26 days: 2.5 kg (5.5 lbs) ? on target Weight loss to go: 4.7 kgs (10.3 lbs) left to go Starting weight: 62.2 kgs (136.8 lbs) Goal weight: 55 kgs (121 lbs) Total weight to lose: 7.2 kgs (15.8 lbs) Daily limit: 1,600 calories Weight loss rate: 1 lb a week Date goal weight: end April Today I'm gonna integrate an 18:6 Intermittant fast (18 hours fast) (meals between 8am and 2pm). * 7.55 Pre work-out coffee 87c Capuccino 87 * Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals * 9.50am Breakfast (muesli) 322c 10g organic unsalted cashew nuts (623) 62 + 10g Bjorg organic sugarfree muesli (367) 36 + 10g organic sugar-reduced granola (437) 43 + 10g organic oatbran (359) 35 + 5g organic chia seeds (449) 22 + 100g organic fresh forest fruits (55) 55 + 150g organic soy milk (46) 69 Total cals so far today: 87c+322=409c * 12pm Lunch (croque monsieur salad) 599c (+ tasted a few slices duck magret for hubby checking cooking perfection) 70 g lettuce (17) 11 + 7g mayo (661) 46 + 50g tomato (18) 9 + 25g bell pepper (20) 5 + 25g onion (40) 10 + 1g olive oil (900) 9 + 80g wholemeal bread (270) 216 + 15g organic cheddar (400) 60 + 7g organic chorizo (498) 34 + 10g mustard (245) 24 + 140g sharon fruit (125) 175 Total cals so far today: 87c+322+599=1,008c 592c left for the rest of the day * 1.45pm Dessert 584c 1 latte macchiatto 80 + 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 307 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 That last meal will be followed by 18 hours of fasting. Total cals so far today: 87c+322+599+584 = 1,592c (+ tasted some duck magret to check cooking perfection, about 3 or 4 thin slices) Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals ? Accomplished today: ? * 8 hours sleep * 20' do-nothing meditation * daily reading from "As a man thinketh" * daily self-love affirmations * no aperitifs * mindful eating * wellbox and exercise * continuing some self-reflection exercises from self-help co-dependency book * new daily "time-keeping journal and "feelings" journal * continuining dealing with my Digital Hoarding Disorder and resisting as much as possible bookmarking and saving stuff in computer files to read for "tomorrow"

Day 29: Today's weight: ? (didn't weigh-in) Weight loss so far after 26 days: 2.5 kg (5.5 lbs) ? on target Weight loss to go: 4.7 kgs (10.3 lbs) left to go Starting weight: 62.2 kgs (136.8 lbs) Goal weight: 55 kgs (121 lbs) Total weight to lose: 7.2 kgs (15.8 lbs) Daily limit: 1,600 calories Weight loss rate: 1 lb a week Date goal weight: end April Today I'm gonna integrate my weekly cheat meal (date night tonight) * 7.20 Pre work-out coffee 87c Capuccino 87 * Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals * 8.30am Breakfast (muesli) 322c 10g organic unsalted cashew nuts (623) 62 + 10g Bjorg organic sugarfree muesli (367) 36 + 10g organic sugar-reduced granola (437) 43 + 10g organic oatbran (359) 35 + 5g organic chia seeds (449) 22 + 100g organic fresh forest fruits (55) 55 + 150g organic soy milk (46) 69 * 12pm Lunch (olive cake & fruit) 554c 165g olive cake (230) 379 + 140g sharon fruit (125) 175 Total cals so far today: 87c+322+554=963c 637c left for the rest of the day * 1pm Tea-time snack 584c 1 latte macchiatto 80 + 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 307 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 Fucking sugar craving got me, kinda blown it today! * 2pm Sugar craving relapse 504c 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 307 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 Total cals so far today: 87c+322+554+584+504 = 2,051c + tasted hubby's lunch (1/2 duck magret) + restaurant for dinner Dinner=1/2 bottle wine, bread, appetizer, starter (cabbage cannelloni, fish rillette, raw veggies), main (stuffed squid, lamb's lettuce, mashed potato confit olive), dessert (chestnut cake, chestnut mousse, meringue) Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals ? Accomplished today: ? * 8 hours sleep * 20' do-nothing meditation * daily reading from "As a man thinketh" * daily self-love affirmations * no aperitifs * mindful eating * continuing some self-reflection exercises from self-help co-dependency book * daily "time-keeping journal and "feelings" journal * started reading "When Society becomes an Addict" by Anne Wilson Schaef * continuining dealing with my Digital Hoarding Disorder and resisting as much as possible bookmarking and saving stuff in computer files to read for "tomorrow" as well as liberating some pc space (decluttering some of the "ehoarding"). * remembered quite a bit of my dreams last night, but I'm not gonna write them up today, that took me an hour yesterday writing them up, so I'd rather spend time on something more concrete, less "flimsy" where I see actual results with how I spend my time. The problem with dreams is that I'm not sure I'm interpreting them correctly, I may be way off the mark, and it seems a lot of investment for few returns in that case. I like to see real results linked to real action. Is dream interpretation just metaphor mongering? Do dreams really mean anything or are they merely electrical brain impulses that pull random thoughts and imagery from our memories? Dunno, but I reckon that hour yesterday could have been better spent, what did it bring me, how did it benefit me? Didn't learn that much from them tbh. Another problem for me is I feel it disturbs my sleep, because when I wake up in the middle of the night I'm spending my time trying to remember my dreams when I should be just falling back to sleep.

Day 28: Today's weight: ? (didn't weigh-in) Weight loss so far after 26 days: 2.5 kg (5.5 lbs) ? on target Weight loss to go: 4.7 kgs (10.3 lbs) left to go Starting weight: 62.2 kgs (136.8 lbs) Goal weight: 55 kgs (121 lbs) Total weight to lose: 7.2 kgs (15.8 lbs) Daily limit: 1,600 calories Weight loss rate: 1 lb a week Date goal weight: end April Today I'm gonna integrate an 18:6 Intermittant fast (18 hours fast) (meals between 7.30am and 1.30pm). * 7.30 Pre work-out coffee 87c Capuccino 87 * Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals * 8.45am Breakfast (muesli) 322c 10g organic unsalted cashew nuts (623) 62 + 10g Bjorg organic sugarfree muesli (367) 36 + 10g organic sugar-reduced granola (437) 43 + 10g organic oatbran (359) 35 + 5g organic chia seeds (449) 22 + 100g organic fresh forest fruits (55) 55 + 150g organic soy milk (46) 69 * 12pm Lunch (olive cake salad) 543c 50 g lettuce (17) 8 + 7g organic mayo (661) 46 + 50g tomato (18) 9 + 25g bell pepper (20) 5 + 25g onion (40) 10 + 7g mustard (245) 17 + 4g fried crispy onion (590) 20 + 110g olive cake (230) 253 + 140g sharon fruit (125) 175 Total cals so far today: 87c+322+543=952c 648c left for the rest of the day * 1pm Tea-time snack 674c 1 latte macchiatto 80 + 75g organic vegan gluten-free white chocolate cookie (410) 307 + 65g organic vegan gluten-free lemon cheesecake bar (304) 197 + vegan lemon vanilla biscuits 90 That last meal will be followed by 18 hours of fasting. Total cals so far today: 87c+322+543+674= 1,626c ? Indoor bike (35 mins) burned 300 cals ? Accomplished today: ? * 8 hours sleep * 18 hours fast * 20' do-nothing meditation * daily reading from "As a man thinketh" * daily self-love affirmations * no aperitifs * mindful eating * continuing some self-enquiry exercises from self-help co-dependency book * ordered some supplements (multi-vitamins, omega 3, green tea, calcium/magnesium, L-theanine, chrome) * started a daily "time-keeping journal and "feelings" journal * finally got a name for what I'm suffering from!! Digital hoarding disorder. This disorder links into my poor time-management/productivity/efficient learning and focus/concentration skills as well as my procrastination/ocd/easily distracted issues. Will do research on that and start digitally hoarding less as from today. 2020 will be the year I conquer that disorder. ********************************** * Dreams last night: Dream 1: getting off train without checking it was the right stop to get off on, in a foreign place (but somehow seemed to be manchester, or birmingham), everything seemed to be "foreign" (signs, posters, etc). I was really looking forward to getting something to eat, a meal, or a snack. I think I had to meet my husband near the coastline or sthg. It was dark and seemed a bit cold, windy and wet. Then worried I'd gotten off the train too early, I should have confirmed the stop was the right one, think I planned to phone my husband to ask him for advice and guidance on how to get back on track (literally, lol, like how to get back on the train and get to the right stop). Interpretation: is the dream giving me a general message in life about not being so impulsive and rash (in this case due to being impatient about getting something to eat) and that I should check info better? to slow down and do things properly? ***************** Dream 2: Someone seemed to be showing my husband and I a map of the favorite place where his mother (my mother-in-law) went in order to die. Zooming in on the place situated on the map revealed that she'd chosen to die next to a river where pieces of wood were floating, like flotsam perhaps part of a wooden furniture or sthg that had found its way into the river (a coffin?). There were just pieces of different sizes of planks of wood. I felt my husband's sadness. Interpretation: her maiden name is "wood", also the river is significant in that ever since about a week ago watching the Netflix documentary "'Who Killed Little Gregory?' I've been obsessed with learning as many details as possible about the case and all the latest news about it. Gregory was found dead in the river. Concerning my mother-in-law she will probably die very soon, she is in a nursing home and is sleeping almost 24/7. ***************** My husband's father died just over a week ago and I had a dream about him a few days later. He had a black sort of spot (was it an insect?) embedded in like a boil on the skin of his lower cheek. He asked me to do him a favour and get rid of it by whacking it off (defo not my cup of tea). I tried telling him I was really not comfortable doing that, I hate violence and was afraid of hurting him if I had to whack the black spot thing off his face. But he started to get impatient with me (which had never happened by the way in real life, he was never impatient with me, always avenant). So fearing his exasperation, I ended up smacking his face to get the black thing off. So situation was resolved. Interpretation: this seems to be related to finding black pests in my organic rice that I'd just bought. The pests had burrowed their way into the grains of rice. (Makes me not wanna buy organic ever again btw!) Also my father-in-law who enjoyed gardening had once suffered badly from having a tick.