TDW1995

@TrynaBeTurquoise I agree. There really is nothing to lose, yet the ego thinks otherwise. It's hard to find out why we take rejection so seriously.

The thought of facing rejection keeps many people like me from approaching attractive people. If I think about it deeper, I often wonder what we are really afraid of. What makes it so hard approach people, and why do we fear the worst happening (rejection)? Typically, if we plan to approach someone our heart may beat fast and we may start to sweat from nervousness. This seems like a survival method that our body is using, but what is really in danger? The idea of ourself (ego)? Honestly, it seems like it would be completely harmless whether someone accepts OR rejects us, but there is still an intense fear.

@Nahm Great question. Probably something to ponder.

@Nahm It's not that I need anyone else. I am approaching my mid-20's and I feel like exploring this area of relationships would be good for me, especially since this was not much of a part of my life. In fact, if I approached someone and they rejected me, that's just fine since I'm perfectly okay being single. But, at the same time, even though I don't mind at all that I'm single, it still seems like it would be painful to face rejection. I think it's more of an embarrassment than anything else.

I have always been an introvert in that I prefer to be in my own space much of my day. This is the reason I have very little experience with women. I've been pretty shy in the past, but I believe that if I "got out" more I'd be fine around people. But that's the thing. I'm not into bars (I dislike drinking), and I don't like the idea of being online. I feel like these are the only opportunities in today's world to put yourself out there and experience relationships. Also, since doing enlightenment work, dating/relationships had been less of a priority for me, but I still very much crave sexual intimacy and think experiencing relationships is important. This issue sometimes makes me feel depressed, ashamed, and embarrassed about the lack of experience I have. There have been several instances where women reached out to me because they think I'm "cute" or "attractive," so I know I'm not completely repulsive to women. Is there any advice you'd have for an introvert who dislikes the bar scene? I also plan on continuing enlightenment work, but putting emphasis in the basic personal development area of dating is something I think I need to take seriously too.

Thanks for the responses. I just think it's a matter of putting myself out in public more instead of being confined within the walls of my workplace and apartment. Some sort of group would probably work best.

Doing enlightenment work has led to a losing of interesting in my career. I used to grow myself by studying topics in my career, but lately I've been putting all of my attention into meditation and self-inquiry, and no time into reading books to grow myself in my career. I'm concerned that I will gradually continue to lose interest my work, but at the same time, I believe that enlightenment work will be way more valuable than my career. Does anyone else feel a loss of interest in other activities while doing enlightenment work?

As long as you are being observant, you are doing meditation correctly. Meditation is all about being aware of the present moment without judgement or control. Even when you ask "Am I doing this meditation right?", you can be aware of the voice asking that question. Whatever comes into your awareness, whether it's a thought, sensation, or emotion, all you need to do is place your awareness on it and do nothing about it. No control is necessary. Also, there is no such thing as a "past thought." What you realize through meditation is that each thought is a phenomenon happening in the present moment, even if it feels like you are actually living in the past. What you will also realize through enough practice is that thoughts are outside of your control. All you need to do during meditation is let you mind go wherever it wants and ONLY watch, do not control. Lastly, I would make sure to do meditation every single day. Absolutely no days should be skipped. If you only have 10 minutes one day, then there you go.

@LfcCharlie4 Good to know. I'm only 24 years-old and just starting my career. Can't believe this lack of motivation came so soon, but I'm excited to see what's available through consciousness work.

@rNOW I've lost interest in many things, not just career. Exercise no longer intrigued me, although I force myself to exercise at least three days/week. I love the idea of being conscious throughout all daily activities. After all, each moment is a meditative experience. Therefore, awareness can be applied during each moment in life.

@LfcCharlie4 I do health and wellness coaching. I believe this field is incredibly beneficial to the world. Trusting that things will come full circle makes me feel better.

The more I do self-inquiry and meditation, the more I realize I have used my efforts in my career to strengthen the ego. Instead of studying and enhancing my career skills to "better the world," I have used it to improve the idea of myself ("I am smarter than other people in my career", or "I am better than others"). It's completely backwards. The self-image itself is a fiction that is slowly being realized through this enlightenment work.

I have an hour commute to and from work five days/week. This means two hours each day are spent on the road. My current routine consists of 30-60 minutes of self-inquiry and 30 minutes of meditation while at home. However, I feel like I'm wasting two hours of my day listening to music on the way to work (I sometimes listen to Leo's videos though, which is not at all a waste of time). Are there any practices/techniques that can help raise consciousness while driving? Obviously sitting down while doing nothing is preferable, but if I can make progress while driving, that would be a bonus.

Can enlightenment work alone gradually reduce our fears (social anxiety, death, etc.)? Fear would obviously melt away with the death of the ego, but I'm asking if this can happen with the progression in this work. In other words, even if a person is not at full enlightenment, will fears gradually reduce with the raising of consciousness?

I sometimes think of enlightenment work as a binary thing. Either you are enlightened and free from suffering, or you are identified with the false self and suffer, no in-between. So if we take an example of a shy person, I'm assuming with the progression of enlightenment work and dis-identification, he will slowly eradicate his fear of social anxiety.

So ultimately the whole goal of this work is to raise awareness to a sufficient level over time until awakening happens. In a sense, I may have been trying to shortcut this by placing awareness on awareness.

I've really been trying to implement Leo's Self-Inquiry video from last December in my practice lately. He says to place awareness on awareness, but I'm having trouble finding this. I realize that we are looking for formlessness, but how is this possible when all we interact with is form? If I place my awareness on awareness itself, isn't that going to be another image or sensation? How is it possible to place awareness on nothing, when it doesn't exist?

"Existence is infinitely intelligent. Think of existence as an entire chess board, it controls all of the chess pieces (and we are the chess pieces and we think we have free will and separate identities). It knows every move and every future move, this is because everything is conducted by and takes place in existence." -Jack Freeman, Owner of Only Freedom Matters I realize the importance of not believing anything in this work. But, if there's anything I want to take and run with prior to realizing the truth, it's this idea here. If we are indeed not in control of our own lives, then it's almost like I have an excuse for any issues in my life (motivation problems, relationship problems, etc.). Now this is living from the egoic paradigm, so all of our issues may be illusory. But, am I justified in using the lack of free will excuse to go about my life each day? Don't get the idea that I'm going to tell my boss to eat sh*t, but if that did happen, I guess I wasn't in control of what words came out of my mouth.

So what I'm thinking is set up a random day to practice an extended meditation session for like 5-6 hours (maybe do this once every so often). And for daily practice, meditate for at least a half hour each day and do a contemplative practice, such as the Neti Neti method. Not to diminish the power of the Neti Neti method, but it seems more basic than placing awareness on awareness at the stage I'm at currently.

Yes, the ego assumes it knows everything, but it clearly doesn't.

So meditating until you feel extremely conscious. It's almost like I need to graduate from basic meditation until I reach the advanced stages (self-inquiry). This is what I'm sensing both of you recommend. @Kalki Avatar @Raptorsin7

I understand that focus is extremely important in doing self-inquiry. I've been meditating for four years. I feel like I have a sufficient amount of focus to do this work, but I know that I will not do it perfectly. I'm doing self-inquiry along with meditation, so I'm sitting down for an hour and a half each day. I'm still trying to get in touch with what is perceiving, and it sure isn't easy.

And the perciever is not form. So, whatever the perciever is, is the true self.

I guess it wouldn't change the way I live till truth reveals itself. Very paradoxical indeed.

I've tried to do this through my thoughts. I have asked the questions, "who willed this thought into reality?, and who is in control of what thought will come next?" Not sure if this is kind of what you're talking about @Consilience .