Michal__

1) 1/3 of a weed cookie The reason I believe that this moment had a past and will have a future and is in space is because I believe my memories. I believe my memories because I have memories that tell me that my assuptions about what happened is correct. The normal assumptions are a bunch of unconcious nonsense.

Leo's evil conservative twin.

Why couldn't he be a serious mystic? Engaging in devilry doesn't negate mysticism. I heard it took a few tries for him to die

You'll learn things that are more correctly aligned with what actually makes money. So maybe cut back the hours a bit so you don't burn out?

This might make some mods screech (especially if they're not familiar with some of the ways spiritual development can go), but you should do a meditation retreat (minimum 10 days, 10+h a day, preferably longer). It's likely you'd get an Eckhart Tolle style instant alleviation of 90% suffering that would stay there even after you are not on the retreat. If that doesn't happen then yeah, I'd get the antidepressants and continue practicing. But you should be able to assess whether you can handle the fact, that at least some parts of the retreat would be destabilizing. Dark night is a lot more common than people think. A dead giveaway should be if you first started with very positive experiences, maybe completely spontaneous (doesn't matter if it's spontaneous, it would just make it more obvious).

Trolling to this degree is still a mental illness, at least in my view. Just a less severe form. It definitely did not grow his channel, so it was not a business decision. At least not a good one. He can't be completely sane and consider eating shit a good marketing strategy simultaneously

Well, business is harder than going to university and getting a job. So don´t expect to have it easier if you go the business route. But when you do succeed it is much more rewarding, both on the mental level and financially.

Read advanced magick for beginners by Alan Chapman and start practicing right away. I have literally thousands of experiences with witchcraft and I consider this to be one of the best starting points. Another great thing would be to combine it with a fire kasina retreat. And the most accurate movie is "The Craft" (the old version). Yeah, some parts are exaggerated but not by much.

Sounds like you used the trip well.

It sounds like you got a legit spiritual realization. Not "last piece of puzzle" by any means, but still, you seem sincere. Just take some time, do psychedelics, contemplate and meditate, and see how it deepens.

Enlightement, in the normal sense of the word, does not gurantee a high level of personal development. Some of them were even warlords. SD Red. All of the classic religions are sexually repressed. SD Blue. And they can lead to some deep realizations. Basically, you can be an underdeveloped monkey even if you are blissed out 24/7 and have a permanent no self realization.

Another thought - I got around not feeling a sense of obligation because my current main client gives me daily deadlines (copywriting). And also - it is important to make sure that I am not taking an order that is more complicated than my current skill level (eg, - doing a lot of complicated modifications to an existing website is much harder than building a website from scratch). So if you can think of a way to do something like that it would be ideal. Idk if it is helpful in your situation, but maybe another thing to think about.

The main issue I see with that is - are you really sure that weekly homework from religious studies (which probably won't do much for your spiritual life) and cramming for exams regarding memorized Buddhist stuff will be more fulfilling than working on your finances/business/maybe starting a second small business? I get the appeal of having a chill time where you mainly study. Especially if it's somewhat related to spirituality. Just something to consider. I went to University 2 years ago because I thought it would be much more chill than working on my business and now I'm considering quitting. But I definitely learned some useful stuff on the other hand. I'd love to do a year long concentration retreat instead of university, that would be much better. Except that requires being able to not work on business at all etc.

When my concentration is high enough it can be so effing accurate that I can tell what card is going to show up before the reading happens. Daniel Ingram and others have reported the same.

Great point. I have been moving my exercise to earlier times and I can definitely feel the difference.

I would expand on that and say that you could spend 50% of your reading time doing the excercises from the specific book and only read further when you finished the tasks on the current page. You could use the remaining 50% to read another book so you dont feel like you are reading this one too long. If you read for an hour a day you might want to bump it up to 90 minutes, so you spend 45m on each. Treat the book like a course instead of your usual reading time.

Maintaining perfect posture and very little movement (maybe a stretch or a walk every 1.5h) is very important for getting as much out of it as possible. Distinguish between movement from restlesness (and do not move) and only consider moving if you are becoming lethargic. If you become lethargic, 5 minutes of walking meditation could be very beneficial. If you do it this way the periods where wakefulness is becoming very deep with zero lethargy should become longer everyday. Even if you mostly meditate less.

1/6 HHC cookie + 1.5h high quality meditation + listening to Eckhart Tolle as a peripheral object = It feels like I am almost 1:1 to his consciousness. I suspect I am in for a pretty big shift this week. Using a peripheral object and not just the main object is perfect for understanding what mindfulness actually is. One pointedness alone is not enough. Upper jhanas are the whole field of experience. Do not underestimate how much energy you can free up by letting go of the tons of neurotic thought you probably have! Interesting experience: It is often said that weed supresses dreams, but when I did a working to have even more astral projections than normally it worked very well even though weed did reduce my dreams dramatically the week before and I definitely should not have had this much REM. Also I have experienced 4th screen kasina twice in the past two days! While only meditating 1 - 2 hours a day. Weed does make kasina way more effective because it creates micro visuals, increases your concentration and makes it easier to enter jhana. So it might be soon possible to stay in high magick teritorry year round.

The good thing about realizing Tolle's insights is that it is possible to walk around in it close to 24/7. Freedom from most negative states of mind is no small thing. It's possible to lock it in with microdosing very quickly. And it doesn't distract from deeper psychedelic explorations.

It might theoretically be that understanding never disappears, it just won't be fully experienced in a lower state of consciousness. I've been experiencing fractals/slightly psychedelic states during dreams (or you can call it between dreams) and I've never even had a trip with fractals. I can for example take a microdose, question stuff, which will turn the microdose to a small trip and then days and weeks after when I question stuff sober I get to keep some of the experiences from that.

Thanks. I will look it up.

So, I was quite impatient and decided to do my LSA trip yesterday and did not do a proper extraction. I did get good results but yeah, the nausea definitely hindered me from fully maximizing the benefits of the trip. - At one point (when I was waiting to puke in the bathroom) it hit me that this room is a singular thing not inside my concepts. Before then I thought that "yeah, this might be the case blahblahblah" but now when it hit my in this specific state of consciousness it is like "holy shit! What Leo says is completely literal! Nothing metaphorical about it all!" Realizing this can very deeply affect how you physically see what you see (the floating room is deepening understanding the floating room). - Another thing: the perception of other things outside my experience is very deeply lodged inside the mind, so when it hit my I did see that my deep assumptions about reality are not correct! In fact, I think that if I went deeper (read: if the nausea did not hinder me like this) it would have very quickly become too intense! It did have a "not ready for this" aspect to it (wondering what will happen if I get past the "not ready" concept) - My "There is only this" seems like a shallower version of "I am God" (which I have not experienced yet). So no, I did not have a God realization but it was definitely in that direction and if I planned my trip a bit better, I definitely might have realized God. I did also experience something slightly deeper than there being only this room, but that is not something I can articulate yet (or comprehend fully for that matter) - Be careful, if you are very sensitive to weed (like me) then even 5 mg edible can have an uncomfortable body load (yes, I can distinguish between LSA body load and HHC body load). I also fell asleep a lot sooner than I should have (I woke up 6 hours later still tripping). But I know that my next session will be epic. And I will definitely extract it next time. I had to pause watching Leos guided God meditation several times, because it was getting too intense at certain points It also improved my habits (at least for now). Being in a high state of consciousness while puking due to poor planning does that to you During my next trip I will contemplate "how does it work that this thing is me".

That will definitely work as long as you are adding resistance/rep/more difficult timing/more difficult variations.

1/4 HHC / weed cookie: Experiencing and deepening panaromic vision / the bubble of consciousness / stepping outside the sense of sight and other senses. Also got closer to completely letting go which is a great way to intensify the trip! Also I'm starting to ask some epic questions which are putting me to some great states, I might edit this later today once more progress is made. Also it 10x receiving transmissions (even of those who are not deliberately giving transmissions - I can get a look at any video/book/etc and experience things they experienced). But asking good questions is still superior to any transmission. Interesting thing that is happening with my trips lately: asking good questions both while tripping and while sober mean that you will transfer more and more of your higher states into your sober life!

It being received by God for free is understanding how it works. The magician himself doesn't actually decide which spell works. But he can get 1:1 with the thing that actually does the magick. Just deepened this insight.