Michal__

Obviously you should trust your own opinion more than what random people on the internet say. If you still want to make some progress towards your LP while doing everything else you want to do you can just spend 30 minutes a day contemplating LP, that way it doesn't affect other aspects of your life in a bad way & you work towards making better decisions in the future.

Online dating works if you are handsome or muscular with decent face and professional photos. If you get good with women irl you can get away even with being ugly.

Perphaps studying & experimenting with the occult for a year would help answer that question

Tbh I'm pretty sure he has had very intense experiences just from the 40 day fast alone. Fasting for 40 days can be as intense as a 40 day retreat. And the video of him meditating is like 8 hours long. There's no way he hasn't had very deep experiences. So maybe his realizations are deeper than what he can make sense of. I remember my first awakening was so intense that I thought I became schizophrenic or some shit. And now I can see clearly that I just wasn't mature enough to handle awakenings as intense as the one I experienced. Since then I've had some deeper experiences but they don't seem scary anymore because I am much more emotionally developed now. There's a shit ton of stories about people who've had kundalini awakenings and then they thought they were enlightened/the second coming of Jesus/physical god or whatever for some period of time before things went back to normal. Some awakenings are so intense that they force your mind to create complex stories to explain wtf is even happening to you. Keep in mind he meditates, does breath work, tantra and practices law of attraction at the same time while having the financial means to pursue it as much as he wants. No wonder he feels they way he does.

That would explain why dark night comes before a cessation, which will eventually lead to Liberation in the traditional sense of the word(when you experience enough cessations). (You find literally everything disgusting during dark night) Basically - you're right.

If Truth is Love then pursuing the Truth eventually tells you what you need to know about Love.

Read up on spiral dynamics stage green. This is most people here.

I'm not saying he hasn't gone of the rails lately, but self promotion? Really? The dude has 3+ million subscribers. I doubt promoting himself on this forum was the goal.

Lol, that's interesting. Idk - try it. Today I woke up at ~5 am with no intention to LD. But because I couldn't get back to sleep I tried a few minutes of noting and then 45m counting breaths because I thought I would go about my day normally and not go back to sleep. I decided I am too tired to go on after meditating and went back to sleep. I woke up again in sleep paralysis. Separated myself pretty fast using the rope technique & while flying from by body I was spinning, my astral eyes weren't fully open so I opened them but I got back to my physical body - probably because I worried too much. Then I was stuck in a very long & uncomfortable loop of false awakenings - I was aware the whole time that those were false awakenings - they were "lucid" but I couldn't do anything to stop them. (Well the false awakenings were actually lucid only just before another false awakening) I tried separating from my body again, although I wasn't successful I saw very vivid psychadelic patterns. Then finally after a few more uncontrollable (+ lucid) false awakenings I was able to wake up for real.

Is this some form of channeling or are you just goofing around?

Other than detoxing make sure that you're consuming some adaptogens everyday.

Concentration meditation + contemplation during daily activities. Asking & answering why you are doing whatever you are doing at the moment alone increases your consciousness noticeably. If you get used to it you could probably get to a point where contemplation during daily activities is as powerful as a formal session.

Why not experiment with trading while contemplating your true life purpose? It's normal to not have a life purpose right away, it can easily take you a few years to find it.

You label what you hear/feel/see(including what you imagine/thoughts). Leo has an interesting take on it but you don't really need a tutorial for it. "Mindfulness Meditation - A Complete Guide With Techniques & Examples". It serves a similar purpose as ADA, except you can just do it WBTB-style if you don't like trying to stay aware during the day. Unless your WBTB techniques depend on not getting out of bed this will increase LDs & APs since they very much depend on you being as aware as possible. Yeah, I used this successfully a few times. I don't like WBTB but when I use it I always do a noting session because it dramatically increases success. The only problem with Leo's take on noting is that it can make you a bit too concentrated to fall asleep again.

If you are focusing on the breath are you counting the breaths? That's very important.

The transcendental meditation technique is different from normal meditation. I tried it. However it is not worth the price. There's another technique called "Natural stress relief". You should use that instead in my opinion. The experience of transcending stays the same. Here's a comparison: https://www.nsrusa.org/compare.php I stopped using automatic self transcending techniques because in the long term the more classic techniques proved to be better for me. These techniques actually put you into some kind of a thought construct that feels nice, is beneficial but it is not meditation. It will raise your consciousness though. There have also been some horror stories, so if someone claims transcendental meditation & the like are completely harmless they are either trying to sell you something or are wrong. If you are going to try it I would recommend either a (solid & maybe long) research of how the technique looks/works or buying natural stress relief, instead of spending that much money. Even though the technique is a legitimate way to increase consciousness the organization is still a cult. If you find a correct self transcending technique & haven't had an interesting/slightly mystical experience with conventional (which means you are a beginner) then it is worth it to either find the correct technique or buy Natural stress relief. I could send you the correct technique for free once I have time. If you want to then message me.

Awesome trip report.

That's really interesting & unusual. You mentioned masturbating many times a day. Try to cut back a bit, maybe even temporarily nofap (a few weeks, let's say). And then sexual release in moderation. I could PM you a thing that would help, if you are interested. Btw if you aren't meditating how about you try meditation? Maybe just 20 minutes of counting the breaths for starters... You may be afraid because you heard about the dark side of meditation but why wouldn't you try? My intuition tells me it will only help.

Then let's agree to disagree about the relation between bipolar & spirituality, otherwise it would be a lengthy debate.

I speak from experience, "expert".

I came up with my own technique (or variation of WBTB) for LDs & APs. What you do is this: WBTB -> a short Vipassana noting session -> back to sleep. Would probably work better combined with affirmations.

Image streaming? I haven't heard of the concept but doesn't that basically mean focusing on the subtle thoughts which then become more and more alive until dream-like images appear? That's what I sometimes do to increase dream recall fast.

Switch to concentration and practice more frequently than ever. Jhanas/absorption states will actually make you perform better at whatever you do. Ego backlash comes from insight. Of course, concentration practice provides insight too but generally it is a bit more manageable. What gurus dont tell you is that once you start meditating and get a bit serious about it there is no going back. But anyway - dont listen to me. Ask yourself why you are meditating in the first place and then decide.

Unfortunately, the only way at this point is through. You can't return back. You have to at least get a cessation. A meditation retreat would help tremendously. On the bright side, once you get a cessation your life will become a 10000% better than it is now (by life I mean mental state & consciousness - which will in turn affect the material side of things too). And you will be really happy that you started. I hope you are meditating at least for 1hr a day. Maybe find a local 10 day (100h) Vipassana retreat if it's allowed in your country (covid, you know). If lockdown is an issue where you live then do your own retreat.

THEME: Cancel culture / scandals (since my understanding of cancel culture may not be deep enough) Stage blue When a person can't share their personal life with public he should not be allowed to be a public figure. God sees everything you do. Why would you sin before the eyes of God and expect not to face consequences? Let the sinner be an example so our children don't follow in their footsteps. Stage yellow Yes, some people should face consequences of their actions. However, there is always the danger of "witch hunting". In fact, many celebrities have had their professional and perphaps even personal life destroyed as a result of rumours, accusations & the general public following the popular opinion. We should educate people not to "witch hunt" & make them able to form a solid opinion about the person in question. Better education could eventually "dissolve" the problem.