Exystem

Wow! Beautiful trip report, I like that one

For evil not to exist only the absence of your judgement is required - wich is one facet of enlightenment

In this short anecdote the brain is a metaphora for the Truth (or Love/God/Self/Consciousness/etc.) 1. Just living life having no questions 2. People telling me about something called the brain 3. People telling me that good and wise people have found the brain while evil and dumb people are far away from the brain 4. Asking others where the brain is 5. Everyone tells me where they found the brain but they all seem to contradict each other 6. Asking others how they found the brain 7. People telling me they have found a particular book and saw the brain in there 8. Looking into these books and seeing lots of different brains, not knowing which is the one true brain 9. Asking a person considered to be truly good and wise which brain it is 10. The person tells me to look inside to find the one true brain 11. Looking inside not being able to find the brain 12. Believing I must be an evil and dump person, I’m far away from the brain, because it’s neither inside of me nor anywhere close to me 13. Being quite disappointed, seriously asking myself where the brain could actually be 14. Realizing that the best and wisest people truly must have found the brain inside, because that’s the only place where you could never be far away from the brain 15. Asking myself how they must have found the brain 16. Finally realizing that they just found out the same - that the one true brain couldn't be anywhere else but inside 17. Telling everyone that I found out that the one true brain is inside of me and so can they find out for themselves 18. Realizing there has never been a place or a moment in time where anyone has ever been far away from the one true brain 19. Asking myself how one could ever come to believe that the one true brain has been lost 20. Realizing that the one true brain can actually never be found anywhere, neither outside nor inside, because it’s everywhere and nowhere at the same time 21. Telling everyone the one true brain is nowhere to find but the moment they finally stop searching for it, they will realize it in everything 22. Realizing there is not the slightest difference between me and the brain, the brain is hallucinating everyone including me/I am hallucinating everything including the brain 23. Telling bodies that nobody exists and trying to point out that no brain is the one true brain 24. Just living life having no questions

Well, first of all I don't believe in Mahasamadhi. Still don't understand how anyone in history would have been able to achieve it when "I" as the appearence of this world obviously exist. And the small individual self dies anyway. So all the stories about mahasamadhi are just made up by yourself in order to give you the reassuring illusion of a choice to annihilate yourself. Whatever self annihilates whatever self. Have never heard of a convincing mahasamdhi concept so far... Maybe someone can clear me up? And on the other hand, the whole world is your body. So no matter whether you have the right chemicals already in the brain or you seem to take them from the outside - remember, inside and outside are one. A spiritual gift may be the right genetics as well as the right drugs. "To posses the spiritual gift" - why making this radical distinction between inside and outside the bodymind when the distinction itself is an illusion?

Wow, thanks for your sharing @electroBeam! To swallow the truth completely you must eat up yourself, which seems to be an impossible task for a human. I fail constantly on that regard. I also see that in the end, no matter how deep my awakenings, I'm still left with only knowing that I don't know. People claim to have realized absolute truth but I still don't know whether a knowledge of absolute truth even exists. Doesn't knowledge imply a kind of seperation between knower and known? I'm just left being whatever I am, the one and only great mystery. I'm grateful for your honesty, I really appreciate that. It reminds me to stay humble and not to claim to know something I don't know. I know nothing, just that my mind can get f*cking twisted and insanely deluded. And I know this masochistic tendency quite well, too. Always looking for a bad trip to reveal more shadows. But this spiritual seeking seems just to be a level up in this strangeloop of simulations, a next bite into my own infinite tail. Next level hypocrisy.

@JosephKnecht Well that's neither a video nor a picture of a photon. Don't know what they exactly filmed but these are zillions of photons. Definitely. Well put! Well, who knows? A wave is just a limited description, it sometimes appears to be one. But there's too much strange shit going on in quantummechanichs to state it as an absolute. Interestingly the human eye can detect a singular photon. That's it. But not for a materialist He must draw a map for the territory, otherwise his life has no purpose anymore.

Right now I'm writing a book to deconstruct everything in order to get rid of the illusions that infested my mind. I also wanna reach other people, especially scientists and self-styled non-believers. Contemplating the nature of myself/god and searching for metaphors I realized the perfect strangeloopy analogy of "a proper picture of a photon". This will be my favorite answer to all the people that want me to prove/show them god: "First show me a proper picture of a photon, then I will show you god!" There are many reasons why a proper picture of a photon is impossible/strangeloopy/infinite. So on the one hand there is and will never be any picture of a photon, while on the other hand all the infinite pictures are nothing but pictures of photons. In order to convince ideologically-stuck people I need your help to find arguments/explanations/ways to realize that there could never be such a thing as "a proper picture of a photon". So please tell me, Why do you think "a proper picture of a photon" is impossible?

When nobody is appearing as mind, nobody minds When nothing is appearing as matter, nothing matters because absolutely every limit is appearing When you are appearing as matter, you will matter When you are appearing as mind, you will mind because absolutely every appearance will be limited So how is it that you strive for the realization of self = not-self / you = nothing? Because you matter to realize it and you mind not to have realized it yet. And why haven't you realized it yet? Because nobody minds whether you realize or not that nothing matters.

Indras net - the same reflects the same within the same I am absolutely recursive for there is nothing else Within the same there must be infinite recursions Within the infinite recursions there must be the same recursion = echo = mirror = iteration = self-referentiality The appearances - just different degrees of self-referentiality/various iteration rates, or infinite subsets of infinity

Have you truly thought it through, Connor? Congrats for your realizations, but you seem to be kinda stuck witin a solipsistic phase. Here are some points to think through before taking a metaphysical standpoint as yours: First of all, there are so called split-brain patients. Their corpus callosum is cut so their hemisheres aren't connected anymore. Interestingly when you give them a key to the right hand they can say what it is but don't know how to use it. Within the left hand they can now open doors but don't know what the object is called. But if you ask them whether their perception of reality has changed since the operation, they confidently reply "no" in most of the cases (left hemisphere is replying). So these patients experience two realities at once, but without direct communication between both. So both parts aren't directly conscious of the other part, which then appears to be unconscious. Secondly, the limits of space and time that a human experiences must not necessarily be the limits of space and time god imposes upon itself. Let me further explain: Obviously our human capacity to understand time is very limited. We tend to think about it in a very linear way. But why should time really be this way? Does it actually exist? Maybe god does not experience time in a one-dimensional linear way but rather as a two-dimensional (or higher) plane? Then there are infinite parallel sets of linear time. Why limiting god to only one linear time axes? Within a two-dimensional timeplane one of the axes represents our linear causality we all are used to, while the other represents the spectrum of all beings possible. The whole timeplane is nothing but "the NOW", with each crosspoint being a moment within spacetime. All are interconnected and simoultaniously experienced within (by) god. But same principle as with the split-brain patients: for the left hemisphere, the right becomes unconscious and vice versa. As for one being, all the others become unconscious and vice versa. As from one perspective, all the others become inaccessible and so on.... Isn't this a much better explanation for what god can do with infinite (!) intelligence/imagination? I mean, does experiencing an ant require the same intelligence as experiencing a superintelligent alien? Are the little bits of information an ant processes really all that god could experience at once? Yeah, you are the only entity, and that's you. Because ants, humans etc. are no real entities/beeings, but different (simoultanious/parallel) persperctives of the same being (god) upon it self. They don't have any independent substance/reality. I could present more arguments but I don't know whether you are even interested in these philosophical abstractions. I just want to remind you to not to be too quickly with stating absolute facts, first of all you can delude and limit yourself and secondly you could delude all your listeners. Maybe you have already overcome the solipsistic phase but not everyone took the work as serious as you did. If you tell your audience everyone is simply an NPC you may cause serious damage. It's important to realize that every limited being is an NPC, including yourself! That the only non-NPC is the only unlimited being called god. We're all on the same way and none of us has figured it all out, because we're all just part of the same game. But don't limit god to single player mode. Within quantum computing all possible processing routes are taken simoultaniously. It's a brainfuck, but closer to reality. This doesnt interfere with the absolute oneness paradigm, it's not a bug but a feature.

I wanted to share this article which hints to the nature of the universe: A holographic fractal built by self-simmilarity. Have a nice read! https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fphy.2020.525731/full#

@Rilles Already happening. You are the chinese students not beeing able to properly learn english because of their teacher.

Notice that it was only 1/50 of what is awaiting for you In a way everything is Karma (action) and nothing (because there is no individual self getting punished for its free choice). What you are doing to "others" you are instantly doing to yourself because there are no others. So everyone has always been punished by karma. When the mind recognizes a pattern in action-reaction happening he calls it karma (instead of applying it to everything seemingly "random" also), though there actually is no real causation happening. Everything is what it is by itself, though there are lots of correlations appearing within the human world.

@Cubbage Wow, what an intense experience! It really reminds me of a very similar experience of mine, there were a lot of parallels! I also had the merging of faces of policemen to friends and family, where in retrospect I realized I was interacting with all the aspects of my unconscious psyche. I really underestimated the effects of high dosages of LSD. Here's my report, it has a lot of parallels with yours, worth reading

@Breakingthewall You're right, ego repressing will backlash on you. But it's rather about letting it do what it needs to do and just observe it without judging. The ego has its perfect place within this world, but it claims the throne of god. It's about knowing what the ego belongs to by letting go what belongs to the ego. Seeing through the veil is only possible when the curtains fall.The upholding of the curtains is a quite exhausting process, so we should get used to sometimes do nothing, in order to see clear and invest the energies more properly.

The ego is the only thing which appears to do something, everything else just is. The ego seems to have the unbelievable important job to make the world a better place. So by either not identifying with the ego or by just observing it, by putting the breaks on it, not fueling it with your attention, you then starve it to death, so the theory. So the impression of doing something arises through the ego, it claims ownership for the movements your bodymind creates. By withdrawing your attention/energy the ego breaks down as if you pulled the plug of your computer. It's like standing on a boat in the middle of a see trying to constantly flatten the waves with the paddle. That's what your ego does in order to create peace and harmony. So just stop it. Rather do nothing, the waves will stop by themselves if you give it some time. It's like murky waters. Don't whirl around in order to see clear. Just do nothing and watch the dirt settle on the ground.

@Breakingthewall lsd + dxm, I didn't feel much anymore and decided to smoke a joint. It suddenly kicked back in exponentially. Beeing happy to feel human again I contemplated a lot about that experience. I realized that the conclusion of beeing the victim of my eternal presence was not really instantly completely present but built up from one thought to another. It changed within time. I slowly realized in which misery I'm in, dramatized it and so on. The whole experience felt like an expanding infnitude of meaninglessness, but it also stopped at one point (when I came back to my physical form again). In retrospect I guess I still perceived through the lense of the ego. Maybe it was something like a bardo-state in buddhism, between life and death. My ego came to the threshold of death and infinitesimally approached it, but didn't actually reach it. So after that I said to myself: Let's find out next time! Seek the bottom. You scratched the surface of death, which may be terrifying. But rather break through it! For you, in your present sober state that is almost too big to integrate I guess. You can only integrate from a bigger "safe" place. Search that safe place. Try to realize the all-containing everpresent unlimited infinite Self. Therefore don't lose yourself in thoughts about what happened and how to interpret it etc. Just become aware of it all without claiming personhood for it. By that, you will automatically realize how your limited ego constructs a story around an imaginary memory which is completely dependent upon a space and time not beeing here and now. Next time experiencing the void again, try to become conscious of the mechanisms with which the ego tries to deny or get away from the experience, and why it does so. See through the process as a failed attempt to hold onto something seemingly solid/constant. That may vaporize the ego. The process within time and space which ripens the human fruit until harvest, this process is actually like a circular movement between more or less illusion. My desperate search for enlightenment is a complete joke, since that is what keeps the wheel spinning. Searching for more creates more to search for. Enlightenment as a state of consciousness is nice, but also could become boring over time maybe. One day you'll ask yourself again: How would it be to not realize myself? How would it feel to believe to be limited? What would it be like to experience something like "others"? You know, it's easy for god to be what it is. But what a task of infinite intelligence is required to delude yourself beyond recognition? So then you prepare your next ultimate trip as a realized self and jump deep down to dive into delusional duality just to slowly automatically rise back to unity again. You will always end laughing about the stunning dumbness veiling the infinite intelligence behind it, that's for sure. Yeah, that's a good idea. Let it settle for a while. Also don't believe the stuff I tell you, there's a lot of personal interpretation and so on. Im seeking for more truth, too. I need to make sense of my expierences also. Maybe it's different for you. You are the only one beeing capable to understand your experience. Keep on searching for the truth in it. I wish you the best!

@gswva To be meticolous, actually there is no state of Oneness - because there is no other state than that, so it can't be a state. You are always "in the state of" oneness so to speak. Your avatar is just the manifestation of the veiling process. By realizing this, the game of hide and seek ends in the most funny way imaginable - it's unbelievable funny to realize that the problemsolver is the only problem that the problemsolver could ever have. But that never was a problem, it is just gods favorite theaterplay right now. So you can still watch the hide and seek games in relative, dualistic realms. As god does trough you and everyone else right now. In a way, infinite perspeciveless dreams are also one perspective - since there are highly limited perspectival dreams, too. The abolute-everything-including infinite perspectiveless dream (including perspectival dreams too) is happening right now in gods mind, and is expressed through you in one particular way amongst infinite ones. So yes, in a way it does if you define "infinite perspectiveless dreams" as encompassing absolutely everything. But the complete alignement is not a process, so it's not leading to this within time. The alignement is more like a property of existence. But your avatar can only realize this within time, if it comes from a deluded position. So perspectives are a part of the abolute-everything-including infinite perspectiveless dream. These perspectives are just "not real" in a way that they only exist relative to something else, other perspectives. They will have a beginning and an ending, not only within time but within the realm of gods mind (all dimensions). The realization of the relativity of absolutely all perspectives is by definition the overall-inclusive perspective (god, void or whatever), which is the only "real" perspective, it has no perspective next to it, it just is. There are no other perspectives possible, if it could be called a perspective at all. Perspective implies other perspectives. But there is actually only one true perspective - yours/gods. You probably just mistake yourself for a perspective/dream within THE perspective (which actually is none). Your human avatar is not of course. The first conscious entity to ever appear shall appear where? Every appearance happens within your true Self, god. God is what it is, "I am that I am". It doesn't renew since time is just a dimension in which its mirror images/echoes/shadows are projected down. God created time. It is the main ingredient for a limited perspective. If you want to explain to a flatlander (2dimensional creature) what a cube is, the best way is to project its shadow onto the 2d-world and rotate it so the flatlander can watch it from all the different 2d-perspectives. Rotating/shifting requires time, so there is the following law: Whatever higher dimension there is, its fullness can be experienced by the one underneath only through time. God is all dimensions, so a limited beeing/entity any dimension underneath can experience god only within time. With time, we have continuous renewal. But there is no "first conscious entity", since everything is here and now, nothing beside that. Gods infninite dimensions are here and now and always have been, they are not renewing/changing whatever. Time is just a perspective, it is a paricular arrangement of consciousness that has access to a (limited) set of dimensions trying to understand god. Where time appears, gods shadows constantly change. Your perception of a linear time is an illusion, fed by your imaginary memory. There are only infinite nows from gods pov. From each one of these nows, gods shadow is imagined to be different in an eyeblink. The first conscious entity to ever appear is as much you right now as it was or will be you in a billion years. God is timeless, it created time. Imagines it right now as "you". All perspectives are imagined instantly because there is no time needed, since god is all dimensions and therefore all perspectives already, there is no dimension outside of god making it possible to change. There are only dimensions within god making it possible to be (manifest). And each of the manifestations needs time to represent the infnitude of god.

Ok then it was slightly different than my experience. The interesting question is: What was that (I), which didn't like to be the void?

Thanks for the nice feedback @Breakingthewall You know it's not that I haven't experienced kind of the same, too. But since that I have realized my limited perspective at that time and have also explored other dimensions. Here I commented my terrifying experience of the void: The void can be fucking scary for a limited perspective. Your ego can't imagine death, it only knows its slow dissolution, which feels painful. Imagining its own death in the face of emptiness is like an infinite approximation to zero, which means infinite dissolution, suffering. You imagine how it would be like to infenitely regress and lose reality, which is terrifying for you. But the good new is, your ego is limited, finite. It can't regress/dissolve forever. So the idea of eternal suffering is just another bullshit imagination of an ego that can't even imagine its own death. In reality, you may experience immense terror, but suddenly it's over, when you're dead. The void is this wonderful death.

@Breakingthewall You are afraid of the void because there is something within you that constanly wants to go somewhere, explore something new, hoping of betternment. That is the evolutional life force within everyone of us. The densier, the smaller focused, the more egotistical it appears. So whatever big or small ego you're perceiving from, the void always "looks" terrifying, because it contains the realization that there is nowhere to go, no escape from here and now, no better no worse within this timeless eternity and in the end there cannot be explored anything new, since it is all just the same. This realization first seems to completely contradict this vital life force that drives everything into existence, because it represents the opposite of the evolutional life force, the ego's only job (finding the best way for the betterment of ones world). So "viewed" from the perspective of an ego, it literally looks terrifying like eternal death, forever locked in the same condition. But the ego can only try to understand the void from the outside, tries to comprehend it from a limited perspective with subjective preferances. But this is not the true void. Void is without ego, without perspective. Absence of all that stuff within time and space. Void is that which can't perceive anything out there because it is everything there is. From the ego's point of view the void is like a dark, black hole sucking the world in. From the void's point of view it is that which spits out the light of life into all directions. So maybe next time in order to really be the void instead of perceiving it from the egos perspective, you could focus your perception on that which judges the experience, that which perceives something as unpleasant. By shifting the focus from within the ego to outside of the ego, perceiving the ego, you may realize the totality of what you are. Then you will be eternal exploration itself, be everywhere you will go, be the self-optimizing life force yourself but still be more than any perspective could ever comprehend. Infinite intelligence and creativity. And that is just beautiful. Perfect. Godly. There will be no hole left to be filled. No need to be satisfied. Everything is in perfect peace and harmony, completely accepted and flowed through with love.

The question is - what is suffering when there is no opposite to it? Does it stay the same forever? Or is it rather defined by the fact that you are identifying with something that dissolves? You can only suffer the deconstruction of something which has been constructed before - like your body. This deconstruction equals suffering, so the construction must equal the opposite, joy. But what limited thing can dissolve/be deconstructed forever? Nothing. There must be construction/joy in the first place to experience deconstruction/suffering. Suffering is nothing but (the fear of) dissolution/deconstruction/destruction. Every pain is nothing but an alarm signal from your body which fears death. As an eternal beeing, there is no fear of death. As a limited beeing either you completely dissolve one day which is ending (you and) your suffering or you get used to the suffering as the new standard because you have no reference point for it, or you stop identifying with that which dissolves and realize yourself as that which can never dissolve. You can think of suffering as loss of energy(joy). There must be energy in the first place to experience its loss. Either it is limited, which implies that it will dissolve within a limited period of time, or it is unlimited and must therefore be constantly reproduced, which then would cause at least as much joy as suffering. But you know, energy can't be destroyed, only shifted from one place to another. So of course there are limited creatures experiencing hell, but not forever. They are gods relative reference point for the joy it actually consists of. Or to put it in other words: The facilitators of darkness Are the true providers To the world's light

Have you taken a nap maybe? Sleepwalking could be a possibility...