Nickyy

@Mikael89 Dude, there is never a time that she becomes more invested or you become more invested. This mark manson guy has never had a relationship. That much is obvious. He's a dating coach and he is talking about things he read second hand on the internet When you are with the girl you love you both invest equally in the relationship. Actually the more you invest in her the more she invests in you.

I read that. Interesting. What he is talking about is irrelevant. It's only relevant for needy guys as a crutch (training wheel). My advice to any male is just sort out your emotional issues and you will not need dating advice like this. Ideally, two emotionally healthy individuals will begin a relationship with both low investments in one another and they will steadily let them grow as the relationship grows. In a healthy relationship, the gap between investment between the two parties would never grow too far apart and the man would never become more invested than the woman

The only time my missus played hard to get was very briefly on one of our first few dates. After that it was plain sailing from then on. I agree with what you say.

Your model of investment in another person is "neediness". That's not what I'm talking about. People need to first deal with their emotional issues before they can truly invest in a relationship. However, that needy voice doesn't really go away completely, and this is where your purpose comes into the picture. If you have found your purpose and the person you're in love with is part of that then when that little nagging needy voice appears you don't get taken in by it. Some food for thought

I think what mikael89 is saying sounds like playing hard to get. She always sees through that one lol, never works ? Just be yourself. Wouldn't you agree? ??

I think you can be invested. I've been happily married for 5 years and I can guarantee that a woman wants you to make her number 1 in your life. But this will only work out between the two of you if you are with her as part of your life purpose.

@NoMM I think the reason you can't see it is because you put others on a pedestal and play status games with them. As soon as you stop playing status games you will see how everyone is playing status games, no matter how subtle. You will feel free from that social matrix of definitions. Until that happens you will not see it, so it's probably a good thing that you feel that you are below others, this means you have more chance of challenging your ego. Most people have no idea what the ego is, they ARE it, they don't see it and how it functions.

Most people are functioning from a place of deficiency. It's only really a small number of people who have been able to break out of those mind patterns and into a state of being. It may seem as if there are a lot of confidence people, but the ego can seem very confident. It's not until you transcend the ego in yourself that you see how almost everybody is bound by it. The ego doesn't really have friends or relationships, it is only a surface thing, a conditional exchange or transactional relationship if you resonate with that term?

You reflect what they don't want to look at in themselves. Understand that most people are operating with a false self, an ego, the last thing an ego wants to be reminded of is its own neediness. In society there is stigma around neediness. The people who survive in the tribe are the ones who can cover up their neediness the best and play the ego games.

For a child. Not for a fully functioning adult. Adults looking to fill those needs in adulthood don't evolve, because the opportunity for those needs to be met is long gone. This is why people at those stages feel threatened by other world views, because some people don't fill those roles for them.

@Danioover9000 Sometimes the mind lies and tries to cover up what's going on behind the scenes so to speak. If the mind says it's happy but the feeling says the opposite, the feeling will be the truth. All that's required then is to listen carefully and be very very honest about what you really think

At the moment you are paying more attention to your thoughts rather than just living life. Practice meditating , getting into the present moment and feel instead of think. The answers you need will come to you at the time, not before. Allow yourself to make mistakes and continue to practice letting go Sometime in the near or not too distant future you will look back on this and wonder what all the fuss was about

A loving God does not allow these things to happen. You are God, are you not? You find these acts disgusting, do you not? You would never allow this to happen, would you? You are the loving God that hates acts of evil and cruelty. Just because those acts are also carried out by you, doesn't mean that you are allowing them to happen.

Just thoughts. That's all. As long as you believe them you suffer

@WisdomSeeker Its more a case that there are much more people at lower levels of consciousness and therefore it only seems as if there is a correlation between physical attributes and levels of consciousness. The vast majority of people are only functioning at blue, orange is considered the ideal of what an adult should be, but that's a minority even though orange holds most of the power on the social level.

@Danioover9000 Thoughts are always linked to emotion. It might be best to start a journal and really get to know this part of you. Journalling helps a lot

You're welcome

It's not looked down on. That's just you

Just enjoy yourself and learn from your mistakes.

@suyenas Absolutely it's compatible with spritiualtiy. As long as your purpose comes from your deepest self, not from the mind. The point of your life purpose is not to discover it to make a change, but to live as you need to in order to feel alive. Everything you create in politics will ultimately come to an end anyway. Did you discover your purpose via your meditation ?

You're never going to get very far with women or anybody in life if you have such strong attachments to your preferences. When you let go of these there will be a possibility that you will indeed become very attracted to women who are not considered "attractive" by societies general standards. This means that you're afraid that you will fall for one of these women who at the moment you don't see as "upto scratch". So yes, this is definately your ego talking. The first step to becoming liberated from the ego is to stop identifying with it and let your true self start to emerge and make the decisions for you.

Just observe the negativity your mind is creating, take a step back from it and be honest with yourself about it, don't defend it, don't say it's good, don't identify with it, but don't condemn it, just be objectively honest about what it is and be honest about how it's impacting your life. Feel the feelings in your body in relation to this map that you created and watch how not indentifying with it helps you to come across a lot friendlier, and in turn this will make you a lot more attractive and will attract better situations into your experience. The key is constant observation and not being fooled by it.

@8Ball There is a paper on the web called stage discriptions by Suzanne cook-greuter. Look up stage 5 , strategist, and if that is your way of interpreting the world then you're at yellow.

Some people can study stage yellow for 20 years and still be at orange. You can tell when someone is actually at stage yellow if you have interacted with a true yellow before and felt the integrity. It's unmistakable and unforgettable

Nice work. Yep it's ubiquitous, that is why you got to develop a finely tuned bullshit detector and mature from infantile judgementalism to mature discernment and healthy skepticism. Even people in your own self development circle are conspiring because it's just part of being human. Everyone seeks power at some level, nobody is immune to corruption and corrupting ideas so that they can come out on top. I consider fine tuning my own inner bs monitor as an essential aspect of PD work. Let your anger inform you when you feel that someone is losing integrity, everyone has an agenda, no matter how well developed they think they are.