Thought Art

“Soon” - Leo Gura

Whether you life is hell or not is no proof or disproof of being God… Waking up isn’t realizing suffering is truth. Suffering is part of being human. But, just a part.

The last thing I recorded. I actually like this song. The recorded is 80%. This is the direction for Pine Haven going forward. There is about 9 others songs I’m going to record and put out called “Old Town Autumn”. Listening to old live performances is pretty cringe. I so think I’m a better singing and artist now. Am I world class? Nope. Will I ever be? Maybe if I keep investing in education and practice. I can improve and I can get better. I will share my work more freely and without expectation… kind of like how I treated open mic’s 5 or 6 years ago. Man, time goes by so fast. These last 5 years have really been about maturing as a human in general. I HAVE learned a lot and grown a lot. But, it’s like a root system you can’t really see it externally.

@Magnanimous You don’t need to be a dickhead. But, you need thick face black heart. Respecting your employees is best. Brendon burchard has lesson on this in growth day pretty sure

@Leo Gura good luck

@Nivsch He started this at like 43. He has the skeleton of a 43, or whatever. He looks healthy and has biomarkers of a younger man. The biomarkers are more important than looks.

@Leo Gura He does like quarterly tests for cancer etc hes the most measured human I. History healthiest biomarkers in the world

@Leo Gura huh? Ohh lol yeah! his abundance your scarcity.!

Owen lies about scarcity all the time

@Leo Gura if the supplements did harm he wouldn’t do you. He doesn’t pay a team of scientists 2mill a year and measure every possible biometric for nothing…

Except he measures everything

Hm, I wonder on the science of your claim. His metrics are very good. Supplementing I’m sure is not as bad as you say. Also, yellow is tier 2 and not spiritual. I don’t recall not wanting to die being tier 1 vs 2. Being yellow says nothing about how long you would like to live.

Resilience and visualization, patience, proper allocation of funds and time

I will invest in coaching, therapy, and courses….

I’ve been building this Qigong thing… and frankly I’m questioning if I want to keep pursuing it. But, then I’m left with….. what would I be working on? How do I make my own thing? Music, likely will never pay the bills. Qigong, is feels like the same. Though people have paid me, maybe it’s more a matter of marketing and scale… Maybe I need more coaching, mentors, and to move somewhere with more opportunity. The problem with my job is I can’t date, I can’t do open mic’s, I can’t do so much because I am living in a work camp. I can’t even make content. But, I can pay off debt. I am basically in debt jail. Haha…. In theory if I keep getting these contracts it’s only for 3-4 months which is a worthy sacrifice. If I was God, I wouldn’t dream this. But, apparently I am God dreaming this. It seems like a waste of time though. Life should be awesome. I have to make it awesome myself. This is just a chapter of my life. When I get back into a better position I’ll have the skills, finances and experience to make something great.

There is no job or career that I want. I want to make music, and study my Qigong/ pranayama/ mindfulness meditation etc in depth. I want to make music and do spiritual work. But, I’m a wage slave….. how do I get out of this fucking slavery? I don’t think I can do sales, I’ve tried a cold calling job in the past and it’s not for me. I have a good earning job and I don’t have to buy food or pay rent so I can put the money toward goals. …. I have a concept of a plan as Donald would say.

I have my money saving, debt paying plan and I can stick to it and rest in I’m doing something right. I have my daily personal growth goals to change the way I think, etc and I’m growing each day. Yes, I’m 30…. I don’t feel that close to achieving financial freedom, and my life purpose though yes I’ve helped thousands of people isn’t paying the bills anytime soon. This makes my self esteem struggle because I see the financial rewards of work as part of my value as a creator. My mind spends a lot of time thinking “how do I do it? How do I make my dreams work? I hate how my life is right now doing this meaningless work!” It’s torture. Then I think about some past opportunities I had and how they ended in failure. How, my own immaturity of my past sort of sabotaged me. So, what’s this next step? Get debt free, save money. Make strides to making my next album with the songs I have written….. release them, likely get ignored by the world…. Keep being a wage slave. Make more Qigong content….. keep being a wage slave…. Jt feels like nothing will change.

Anything of value is hard to achieve. Sometimes I feel very upset with my level of success in life. I want way more success.

Yes, it is. I revisit it often.

@Leo Gura Or, I am just bad at remembering my trips. Which is unfortunately the case. I struggle to recall the state, and I also am wary of any conclusions made. I've definitely experienced infinity and ego death. But, I wouldn't call that death. BUT THAT isn't like I was shot in the head and died. Well, in theory I have died an infinite amount of times. But, none I can recall.

@Leo Gura Rumi is good. I also like Abn.

@Leo Gura Right, says the dead guy. I know you have experienced altered states you consider equal to death. Infinity and all that. But, you also eat healthy because you want to live. So, it’s sneaky. You know, I’ve experienced a thing or two. But, I don’t say I’ve died. I can’t with a clear heart say that.