Jesus Daniel

So I stumbled upon this video... I just wanted your guy's thoughts on this, I have been recently getting back to psychedelics and their healing nature, and how they are good for humanity and consciousness overall, defending them to the brim because of their mental health benefits, seeing how they have transformed not only my life but the life of others around me in this world. One of the most mature, educated, loving, selfless, successful and rich people use psychedelics, and I want to go balls to the wall with them. I was just seeing good information, but then I stumbled upon this video... Do you think this is a risk of using ayahuasca, because of its potency? Or was he already predisposed to mental illness? Or did the steroids have anything to do with his psychotic break? Or am I using the wrong mode of thinking to this? I always propose using psychedelics with love, consciousness and to be careful with them. But seeing cases like this breaks my heart, knowing the other side of the spectrum and knowing how it has helped so much people, and it's such a shame. Please, any insights?

It was on a half a tab of 250 UG. I'd say I awakened or was enlightened in that moment, but I'm most definetly not in that state now. It would be too paradigm shifting for me. I would rather have that happen to me when I'm properly mature and managing myself, full responsibilty. I am 19 years old, there are still many things to work on.

THIS IS WHAT NOT TO DO ON LSD OR ANY PSYCHEDELIC. Follow the rules. Do it in a safe place, Search up side effects, have someone who TRULY cares about your trip sit you if you need to. Don't do it if you are not in the right state of mind or "For fun (Low doses are better for that though)". This was a few months ago from now. I have tried LSD before and handled it quite well. Even at my highest dose which was around 340 ug, I had an amazing trip. However 2 years later, after learning about Leo and watching his videos, taking it seriously, and trying to build my own life I came through the worst realization of my life 3 hours on the LSD trip. I was immature and childish, not living up to even my own standards. Now I am warped beyond imagining and start to truly lose my sense of reality, I know it's hitting super strong, I am fucked. I didn't feel I existed anymore, but I was still here. The paranoia was severe as I thought this would leave me schizophrenic. My head hurt, my heart rate went through the roof, I was nauseous, I couldn't think or communicate, my short term memory was shot. Both my anxiety and fear are up the roof. "I did this to have fun, and now look at me" I did not want to let go or die, but I did regardless. I was God. I closed my eyes as I was this infinite beam of pure light and energy radiating throughout the cosmos. Everything Leo talked about was true. I was one with it. I was one with my life. "Life IS a DREAM. WOW! Exactly like a dream!" I was one with everything. There was no difference between me and reality. It all was a dream, and this is what reality is. "But how can I be God?" "But why couldn't I be God? "I am God." It was too much responsibility. Too much for me to handle. I got insight into what this all means. What my reality means, what my emotions mean, why they are supposed to happen. I clearly saw what was wrong in my life, but the scary part is I couldn't change a damn thing about it. It showed me life and the universe was conscious and was always trying to guide me towards the best consciousness possible, but that many times I have taken the universe for granted and became an unconscious devil. I was living my life egotistically to the max, just finding passion instead of true honest strong relationships. None of this was doing me good and I was still doing it, and I felt like I never saw through it. I once again became conscious of absolutely everything and the nature of my existence. I felt horrible in my body and I must admit I had a bad trip, but that didn't take the beauty away from it. It was the fear of warping my mind to a point where I wouldn't come back. I learned I shouldn't mess around with this kind of stuff. Since then I have gone on to try more natural stuff like shrooms which I have a mush better reaction to. I find it easier on the mind and less dangerous. I have since stuck with the idea that using strong psychedelics way too often can lead to never coming back from a trip, especially if you are underage since your brain is still developing. In this case I was being immature and cocky. Always try out a small dose to gauge your sensitivity, even if you have tried the substance before.

I’m interested in experiencing god and how it could be like. I’ve tried bufó Alvarius venom before but always get scared because of the complete ego-dissolving nature of it and the fact I get respiratory depression just before dying. It’s like I have to stop breathing to die. Just for background, I’ve already broken through on DMT and LSD and went to other dimensions. I’ve done research and it seems 5-MEO-DMT is very dangerous and it makes me not want to do it. I fear I might risk serotonin syndrome or to have actual physical harms. I want to use 100 MG of smoked bufo Alvarius venom to dissolve and experience god, or just hit the pipe until I die. Is it safe physically to do this? I’ve never had a severe reaction to it, just the normal (Heart pounding through the roof, anxiety when I’m about to die, deep trance-like state) The only weird thing for me is I get respiratory depression, I asked the guy who sold it and he even said it wasn’t typical. Is it ok to do this dose with the bufó venom? Even if I stop breathing? I’m 18, physically and mentally strong and healthy. I know my heart isn’t going to give out or anything like that.

@steenadrianmr Thank you my dude! I already have quite a bit of experience with the bufó medicine. I’ve had atleast 3 near death experiences with it, so I want to try having the full on breakthrough. I’ll just smoke it slowly, one dose and a minute after another one and so on and so on until I disintegrate fully.

@Corpus What I want is to experience god and to experience my death. I want to disintegrate fully now, so I’m thinking to just hit the 100 mg of bufó venom until I Die, doesn’t matter if I don’t smoke it all. I always get so close yet get so scared because of the complete ego disintegration. Well it’s not just that but the fact that I also get some sort of respiratory depression, it makes it hard to breathe. But I would just need one more tiny hit at that point. I’m thinking to keep going but breathe as hardly as I can while doing so. The weird thing is I don’t have any cardiorespiratory diseases that I’m aware of... I should be fine physically if I don’t OD. Psychologically though I know I will be obliterated into infinity.The “Me” as this human form will not exist anymore. I might even physically die because that’s what It feels like. I’m prepared for that. But still, I like to take precaution always.

https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn%3AANd9GcTyYkU91bUch6IT3VGD19BxS8uvCjRHlaLbmGRKpGHvflcQzO1h That’s 100 mg of bufó venom. I remember smoking atleast half or a little more of that (Yes I took the pic) and saw a white light coming through when I closed my eyes. I remember barely being able to breathe, and felt how I was starting to disintegrate into my surroundings. I was so scared though since this included my death. I was dying. So I breathed heavily and didn’t want to cave into it. Came down completely in 20 minutes or so, but felt on edge for hours. I’m pretty sure 5-10 mg isn’t going to do much, or maybe your venom was just that potent...

@Kensho Are you sure? 5 mg of bufó venom won’t do anything. 5 mg of 5-MEO-DMT would though. I’m sure you meant 50 mg of Bufo venom. The dosage is higher with Bufo venom. From what I know, 70-100 mg is the high dose.

@steenadrianmr Thank you! I already knew it was very dangerous with an MAOI, but I’m not gonna combine it with that. I want to have a breakthrough dose with 5-MEO-DMT alone (Bufo alvarius venom), and I wanted to know if it’s safe to do so. It’s the only psych I cannot fully surrender to because it includes my death. “I” As a human being with a body that’s a man and talks and that has friends completely goes out of reality. I’ve seen Leo do this quite a few times so I doubt that it might be dangerous physically even in the high dose range (But I know an OD is possible with this substance), that is if you are physically healthy, Because your heart will race like crazy... I can’t imagine having hypertension or cardiac problems and doing it. It would definitely be fatal. I’m interested in seeing what is on the other side of death and coming back knowing what it’s like. It’s really hard for me but I’m determined to do it at least in one point of my life. I’ll do more research on the bufo Alvarius venom... Thanks!

So I’ve had a trip with 5-MEO-DMT (Bufo Alvarius venom) earlier, and as my heart was beating fast and my ego tried to reject it, I let it happen and went deep into a therapy-meditation state, as one half of my head felt iluminated, the other half felt like it was dimmed down. I saw light, lots of light in one half of my head. The other part was dimmed down. As that happened, I was hit with a memory of a day where I was doing a lot of drugs and alcohol at once, while a voice was telling me “See? There ARE repercussions”. When I heard that voice I also associated the dimming with my frequent cannabis use. Since today I proposed not to smoke. I don’t do drugs apart from cannabis now My question is, could my cannabis use have caused this? Does it dim you down? I must mention I am 18 years old and been smoking since 16 almost daily. One time I did so much DMT that at half trip, I felt this phenomenon, one half of my brain felt fine while the other half felt tripped out, with one eye I was seeing things normally while in the other It was all distorted and trippy. My Friends looked at me and told me that I “Did not look so good”. I also associated that. I am scared that I might have dimmed down my brain’s potential, and that it may never come back. But that’s just a fear. Can I somehow recover? Is this permanent? Would love to hear people’s thoughts on this. Thanks for reading.

@Aaron p It was actually the right part of my brain that felt dimmed down. It supports the association with cannabis use even more, since I’ve seen that cannabis doesn’t let the brain fully develop. I was seeing that even when you are 21, your frontal lobe on the right side is still developing. I might get myself checked soon. I will leave it for a while and see if that changes the 5-MEO experience.