Byun Sean

@Drake72 @ArchangelG In a lot of his videos, I remember Leo saying many times "never believe anything I say. Verify for yourself if what I say is true or not. Converting people into some ideology or belief system is not the goal here. If you turn actualized.org into an ideology that you blindly follow that is your doing not Leo's. Same goes for other people.

@preventingdiabetes He's not listening to you because 1. He looks at reality in a completely different way than you. A different level of consciousness, experiences, life situation, etc causing him to pursue certain things to fulfill his unique needs for where he's at in life. Consider he may not be at a point in his life where he is ready or interested in self actualization. A lot of people aren't. 2. You see him as an imperfect or flawed person that needs to be fixed by being put on the path of self actualization. He senses this off of you making him want to reject every idea you have to say. People like to feel loved, welcomed, and accepted before opening up enough emotionally to ask someone for advice. 3. If you truly want to help him: 1. love him as a perfect and whole being as he is without need of change. 2. Never give advice unsolicited. Speak your truth but never with the intention of changing him to be different to fit your ego's ideal picture. 3. If he asks for advice, meet him where he is at and really try to put yourself in his shoes.

Theres no quick fix solution for attracting a great romantic partner. meditation, shadow work, therapy, journaling, emotional work, reading books, psyches, practice socializing, identity shifting etc (you can do research on an endless amount of these techniques. I'm pretty sure Leo has a video just on listing these self actualization techniques) can all improve your self esteem and level of Self-Love which makes you naturally more authentic and a stronger man thus increasing your attractiveness and value as a man. The big picture here is working on loving yourself from the inside out first so that your authentic self shines through effortlessly with no resistance. Attractive qualities like humor, confidence, spontaneity, and more are a natural expression of authenticity which comes after the man does enough inner work/ is conscious enough.

If you are serious about true love and selflessness, take up serious spiritual practice like meditation, kriya yoga, psyches, etc for at least 1 hour a day and do them with laser focus. If you already do these practices, I recommend upping your rate or time you spend on them. However much you can handle can be life transforming insanely fast. Also observing mindfully when you catch yourself acting out of selfishness and then loving yourself for being selfish anyway can also be very transforming. Whenever your boyfriend or any person does anything that triggers you because of their selfishness, pretend that person is you and allow yourself to love yourself for being or doing that exact same thing that you hate. When you love yourself for being selfish, it does not condone or excuse you to be more selfish. It's precisely the opposite. The only way to defeat selfishness is by accepting and loving it to death. This also doesn't mean you can't get upset or triggered anymore. Let yourself get triggered or angry and let yourself feel all of that. Whatever your feeling is ok and justified simply because you are feeling it in that moment. But watch yourself while it happens and make the conscious choice to love yourself for that thing no matter the outcome. Suggestion from my mother: Maybe your selfishness in relationships comes from a place of scarcity of something? Scarcity of affection? Feeling like you can never get enough of something? It may come from somewhere. Maybe you can trace it back to childhood or something like that.

apply your own skeptical thinking to your own skepticism ideology. What if thats not true? Also the Truth is simply what is the case and always has been and will be no matter how much you question or believe one way or another. You can never hurt the Truth by questioning it. Only falsehood needs to be defended from being questioned further. Your fear of opening up to new ideas already smells of falsehood and ideology. This is not a negative thing. This means there is room for more growth. Your not believing in crazy nonsense when you open up to new ideas. You are simply opening up to the possibility of your worldview being incorrect and that another idea could potentially be true. Your being flexible. Your not making any conclusions one way or the other because you are admitting at this point that you simply do not know what is true. If you realize you truly do not know and you acknowledge it. This is amazing because now the pursuit of actual Truth can begin whatever that may be. Most people don't care about the Truth. The Truth is very dangerous to the ego.

I used to get really bad anger playing video games too. I would get super mad when my opponents would beat me with a strategy that I thought was stupid and should never work. Sometimes they would even rub it in my face too by being bm and rude in various ways. One thing that helped me a lot is distancing myself from my skills in the game. If I identified myself with my skills or think of myself as some "amazing player" or lets say I identify with my current ranking, then I need to defend that at all costs and I'll get super mad if I lose. But if I think of it like: I am not the game or my skills. The only thing that matters is what consequence I make happen on the screen right now. If what I do works it works, if it doesn't its not a statement that I am dumb; but simply that the way I played doesn't work. Doing this was huge for me because it made me think of every win or loss as a statement about how the game works as a system rather than a statement about me as a player or my opponent. "I will try my best to bring the most solid play I can to win. If I don't win. The way I played needs to change If I want to win next time. I as a player am already perfect whether I win or not. I just play for fun. If it's not fun, I don't need to play right now." It also helped me a lot to pause between games and let myself just sit with my anger after the game. Like sometimes I would just let myself vent to myself. "Ah man I'm so dumb I lost to that. How could I lose to such a stupid player. That strategy would never work 90 percent of the time. He's so dumb. AAAAAHHHGGGG." And just let yourself vent like that and feel all of it until you got it out of your system. And then usually after I did that I would come back to my senses and be like "ok the way I played doesn't work, lets see if I can figure out what I can do better next time."

@ColeMC01 Do whatever you want but the quality of the partner you will attract will be directly proportional to how much you work on and love yourself as a man. Your goal here is not to fake an inauthentic version of yourself to get laid. The goal is to love yourself more and allow yourself to be more authentically you more of the time which actually makes you more attractive. The only reason some girls look 'out of your league' or 'beyond your grasp' right now is because they probably have a lot more value than you as a guy. Increase your value and level of Self-Love enough and you will perceive them as simply regular human beings just like you. As you increase your value, so will your standards for a partner. And vice versa. A high value girl won't settle for a low value guy.

Samadhis and psyches maybe lol

ask directly. I would never take my chances with something like that.

Dating is a reproductive value negotiation table. If you want to increase your chances with high quality women you need to first increase your value as a guy. Just like guys want to date the hottest feminine women, women want to date the most masculine guy they can find. Ways to increase your value as a guy: -Work on your personality. This is huge. Women are attracted magnets to hot personalities. Mainly loving yourself more. attractive qualities like confidence and humor are a natural expression of when one loves themselves enough to let their true self show. -Working on looks is good, but it's not nearly as important for attracting women as personality. Develop a solid sense of style and look that you feel yourself and confident in but don't obsess over it too much. -and lastly women are attracted to: -fame, status, and money since these also increase your value. Personality I've found is the easiest and most effective way to increase your value as a guy. ways to work on your personality: -meditation/ spiritual practice -practicing approaching women while consciously practicing techniques in books/ online and stuff. Being more authentic. -build a social circle. Socialize more. Meet new people. talk to women more in general, even ones you aren't attracted to. -read books on dating and attraction -eat healthier -work out at the gym

Consciousness desires to explore all of itself. Infinity includes every single finite possibility. If it didn't include all the finite parts it wouldn't truly be infinite.

infinite consciousness. Any finite form is 'lesser' than infinite and must have a degree of fear to survive. The more conscious you are in your human form, the more selfless you are and the less of a need for survival there is for you.

Thats his own evaluation of his experience. No one cares where other people are at in their journey. Don't worry about other people. Focus on working on yourself. Your experience is all that matters.

yeah just chill and think about it as a fun experience and just enjoy your time. If a catastrophe happens? You can move on with a good story to tell.

I recommend: Conversations With God 1-4

Usually people feel the need to rush out college for financial reasons. If you and your family feel pretty stable financially and you don't need to rush out your degree then yeah a gap semester/ year to do inner work could be extremely worth.

@Leo Nordinbro. If you can just finish high school. You have what? Like 1 or 2 years left? It will give you so many options that you might regret not having later.

Ghost anyone anytime you want. There is no universal morality. That being said keep in mind the impact your actions have on yourself and the feelings of others. The healthy option in any relationship though is to be upfront and honest with your actions.

survival keeps you distracted by the content of life so that you will never look at structure of your own mind like we do in spiritual work.

@Thestarguitarist14 Do whatever you want mate only offering my perspective

@Thestarguitarist14 Your grave mistake is thinking that there is a "happily ever after" to life which is enlightenment and that anyone not pursuing enlightenment is not fulfilling themselves properly. When you really awaken you will realize that all issues were imagined and fabricated by the ego and that you never had any issues in your entire life to begin with. Does this mean you can't make your life better? Of course not. You can make your life a lot better. It's just that you as God want to experience all of life. The good and the bad. The high and the low and everything in between. So suffering and ignorance is not a bad thing. You incarnated to experience every type of suffering there is! On a soul level this is your greatest joy. Exploring all of yourself. But of course you need a radical shift in consciousness to understand what I'm saying. For your own practical use, you may find that people won't respect or seek you out as a teacher to help them change until you counterintuitively accept them as they are without needing them to change. For whatever reason you seem to have an egoic agenda against people who don't live life your way.

@Thestarguitarist14 Go to a homeless man on the street and talk to him about enlightenment see if he listens to you. Take the same man and give him food, water, and a clean place to live and then see how he responds. Human beings fulfill needs in a particular order. There are many scientific models of this if you are interested with probably the most popular one being Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. Self transcendence is at the very top. It turns out we fulfill our needs from bottom to top and ending self actualization and self transcendence. Everyones at a different spot. You don't scold a 4th grader for not being able to do 7th grade math if you love him and wish for him grow and improve on his own time. You understand you were once in 4th grade too and learning can be difficult sometimes. Yes, it's fantastic if a kid is in 4th grade and is ready for 7th grade math. But if he can't do it yet. It's ok isn't it?

Aight mate. Well you know you best. Seems like a matter of how much Self-Love you have to me. As for the other guys everyone is on their own journey and has a different amount of Self-Love. One thing I learned is that a lot of people on this forum myself included can be a lot more 'spiritually talented' sometimes than the masses. What I mean by this is you can't expect every person to be able to sit down for several hours a day and go full monk like you might want to. Some people just have thicker/ more dense karma to work through that makes it extra difficult for them to meditate. Or they might have some health issues holding them back for instance. It's often an amalgamation of these things and if a guy is thirsty for sex he obviously can't just stop being thirsty for it by deciding not to be. That would be too easy. He might need to fill his lower needs first to be ready to tackle the higher ones.

Of course you can mate. Enlightenment only deepens the love

relationships can help you grow a lot if you mix with the right people. It's not all need fulfilling and distraction. Also why not have both in your life? Relationships are a part of life and can be enjoyed as such. Let them bang all the girls they want. As long as it works for them, who cares? I understand where you may be coming from though because at a certain point in my journey, I also held your exact point of view. Deep down your afraid of depending on someone else because that makes you vulnerable of being hurt. The thought of it probably even makes you unstable. You then go about projecting this onto the outside world thinking that you are superior to everyone else because you are so detached and those other needy people are not. In fact your fantasy I'm willing to bet is becoming so intelligent, wise, amazing, and conscious of a being yourself that you don't have to depend on anyone or anything. Sound familiar? Keep doing this consciousness work and maybe one day you will realize that the one way those thirsty guys were stronger than you in, is the strength in being vulnerable enough to put their needs in the hands of another. Also. I notice you may have some unresolved shadow material surrounding your own neediness that you are projecting onto other guys which is why seeing them on the forum irritates you.