blankisomeone

Choose high quality books and savour them in your own pace. And take your time to implement the lessons learned. High quality books can be so densely packed with information that you can't possibly get through them in a week. (A stage yellow frustration)

This is gonna be a little bit of a rant. Brace yourselves When I was a kid people would always say I was the smartest person in class. I would always get A’s and people loved me to be in their groups when the teacher assigned us group work. People would fight to have me, because they knew I was creative and intelligent. I would get compliments from teachers all the time and my parents would always show me off to their friends. People used to compliment me so much that I developed a very intellectual, superior ego. BUT (and this is an important but) I always felt that that wasn’t right. I always hated feeling superior to people. I didn’t want it. But at the same time I did recognize that my IQ was slightly above average. I liked that about me, but I didn’t recognize that as an excuse to feel superior to others even though people would feed me that belief. Because of many other personal reasons that I won’t get into, as I turned 13, I developed some sort of depression. I lost interest in school, I lost interest in studying, reading, writing, EVERYTHING. My grades plummeted, like my will to keep on living. I went to a very bad school afterwards because the good ones wouldn’t accept me because of my now low grades. But my intellectual ego was still running. Even though I had nothing to show for it, I would catch myself judging others and I hated that so much. To this day, I still notice myself judging others in my head and I hate it. I feel that I give off a “superior” vibe. I hate it because it isn’t true. I’m not superior to anyone! I hate it when people tell me I’m intelligent, because I’m not. At least not anymore. Since my depression robbed my interest in studying from me, my “intelligence” turned into “arrogance”. I just want to be less arrogant, less judgmental. I want people to be comfortable around me. I just want people to genuinely feel accepted in my presence. It happened to me once, when these two people I met were so accepting of me, because I told them I’m bisexual, and I didn’t see ANY judgement in their eyes, in their actions, in how they treated me. I GENUINELY felt it. They were very loving people and they weren’t even trying, it came so naturally to them, and I think of them all the time! The way they accepted me and treated me like any other person was priceless!! It was the best gift someone could give me EVER. I fucking cry whenever I think of how loving they were. And I want to be like that to other people! But I can’t because of this stupid egotistical “intelligence”. I’m a mess, I just wanna let go. If I at least had something to show for it, then this intellectual ego could be forgiven.

It’s so weird, though, isn’t it? Cuz like, LOGICALLY, if the body is exactly the same as the ego that inhabits it, then the body should also just POOF, just like the ego, since they’re the same thing... It doesn’t seem to make sense. But maybe it doesn’t have to make sense... i need to get me some 5-meo to get on to you guyses wavelength?

I don’t know, probably an infinite amount that we can’t even imagine right now… There’s videos on YouTube of people trying to describe colors to a blind person. But you can explain and explain endlessly, but only the experience of actually seeing a color can do it justice! No amount of word description will get closer to what “red” is than actually shutting up and LOOKING at the color red with your own eyes. Obviously haha

All the time

Mastering your own mind is ESSENTIAL. If you master your mind and learn how it works, then you can effectively do science with it. Read books on it. Read “A Mind For Numbers”.

Imagine watching a movie where everything is so easy for the characters. That’d be so freaking BO-RINGGG

Because it’s more fun if its harrrdddd boiii❤️

You know that shitty feeling?

@Johnny5 Thanks for the suggestion, man. Also, that might have just been the cutest video I've ever seen

there's too much information how to deal with information paralysis? (I don't even know if this is a thing, but you know that feeling when there's too much information available that you don't even know where to start and you just say fuck it and give up?) how to filter information down to what matters? (I'd guess that, without exaggerating, 99% of the internet would be discarded in such a filter)

Change my mind

Yeah

Holy shit. The last one where they keep the dead bodies at home. They didn’t watch Leo’s video about letting go?

omalord he actually did drink the blood i am shook osnsksjaosj???

Yeah lol This is the part where you gotta find the answer for yourself Yeah man this why I have trust issues?

I don’t know. What do you think?

This ain’t about you. It’s about the mental health of the population and the people involved in the making of some videos

I wouldn’t work?

How do you know Leo hasn't suffered/suffers a lot? Do you think suffering only equals being physically hungry or being poor? Dude, just by inhabiting our bodies we're fucking suffering.

@Leo Gura , this guy just said the opposite of what you said in a previous post. You said that chances are you'll reincarnate into an even worse life. Because you said chances of you being born in a good life amongst 8 billion people are very slim. You also said it's possible that you reincarnate into a fly that will get smashed on the window of a car. This guy is saying it's a sure thing that your life will be better because reality isn't dumb as to send you to be a pig about to get slaughtered after doing so much work as a human that's putting in work. So who should I believe? lol fuck off guys haha, y'all confuse me My first reaction is to call BS on both of you...

@Leo Gura So hell is real. I mean, look at this Earth. God is crazy with his unlimited Love. A madman. This fucker can create the worst hell if he so wishes and lock himself in it for eternity. Can’t he? If God is all powerful then surely he can create a rock he can’t lift. That shit’s fucking scary. If God is eternal Love can’t he create an experience of eternal Hate? Oof, I’m getting scared as I write this...

❤️

Cool. I watched that video, too. I did the exercise with different types of music by listening to a little bit of many types and trying to draw distinctions. I of course noticed that I’d enjoy some types of songs more than others. But then I tried to drop my biases by simply becoming aware of them, because I wanted to simply notice the distinctions and not pitch in with my own opinions. Then I realized that I even started enjoying types of songs that previously I’d hate. At a certain point tears rolled out of my eyes because I became emotional when I thought “woah, this type of music is actually really cool. Why was I not allowing myself to enjoy this?” Not that now I’ve acquired different tastes just by doing the exercise. It was more like just a moment where my ego dropped and I was simply listening to the songs without judgement. And that was a beautiful moment. But then of course the part of my ego that isn’t a fan of certain types of music came back. I realized that my mind was playing an ACTIVE role in drawing the distinctions and dictating my likes and dislikes. It’s a pretty cool exercise. Not only does it help you learn about the world more consciously but also opens your mind to other possibilities. Did you taste the Apple laptop too? (Sorry I just HAD TO...?)