I'd like to give you this on your way:
Being drawn to such a personality (be it male or female) in most cases has to do with a pattern you have. This pattern also most of the times comes from childhood experiences. So advices like "leave her" are idle as long as you do not resolve the pattern into a healthier one and this can only be done in identifying the pattern. Identifying it means you are drawn to people that bring that pattern up in you and "help" you to see it. Once the pattern is identified a lot of times one needs external help to get rid of the pattern and get things clear (because there is a lot of resistance in wanting to see and dissolve it).
My personal experience is that apparently I needed a "hard core" training to let go of my deep urge to rescue other people (especially partners). I just finished a 2,5 years relationship with a man that had been deeply traumatized in his childhood (violence, no security at home, emotional abuse, a sadist mother).
Heaven in the relationship was (about 5-10 % of the time): I had a deeply loving relationship with him. Being able to live forms of sexuality and a level of intimacy that I had never dreamed of before. It healed a lot of wounds in me and changed a lot of things to the better in my body.
Hell was: He could not cope with me seeing other people, tried to control me, little things triggered him and put him in states of dissociation. And he blamed me (not openly, but with undertones) a lot of times for his emotions. After a certain time (I can't even recall when it started) my body went into panic-mode and stayed there even when he was not around. I lost a lot of energy in this relationship and tried so much to help him get out of his terrible states of permanent fear, insecurity and negative thinking (the whole world is hostile for him).
Good was: I learned a hell of a lot about trauma, which helped me a lot to deal with it when encountering it in clients as a sex therapist. I think I could really step out of my pattern wanting to take too much responsibility for other people. I feel that my energy has definitely changed and it feels good. In general I can be in an energy of benevolent compassion but can leave the responsibility where it belongs to. I feel that this attitude is much more respectful towards other people.
The game changers for me were "systemic constellation work" and group-sessions with psychedelics.
Last december I realized that my relationship with that man was a restaging of my situation with my father who was bipolar. I remember that I was deeply torn apart when I was 19 and my father was laying in bed crying for hours. I wanted to live, go out, have fun. But how could I? A loose-loose-situation. Leaving him felt like betraying him. Not going out felt like betraying myself. I decided to leave him. It was a very healthy decision, but left me with a lifelong (unconscious) bad conscience. So finally I meet this man and try to make it up to my father in choosing to stay and not leave him, despite all the difficulties and challenges. I felt like I wanted to be loyal (this time).
After this connection got clear it took me another 7 months to quit the relationship, despite the fact that I still love him. It was and is very painful on different levels. But it feels right and my life feels much better now, although I still miss the heaven-part in our connection.
Good luck on your path, wherever it may lead you!
