bazera

@AION I do both actually, with Ralston's content especially, it's pretty dense. You might miss some essential point when you only read summeries of it. Of course not all books are like that, nor videos. But Leo's videos are like that, I think you'll miss some stuff if you just listen to AI summeries. There's time to be efficient and there's time to be serious when it comes to content such as those two mentioned. There is a button on YT videos, "Ask" button, that gives you chat with Gemini, I use that a lot with lots of videos, I just read the summeries, but not with Leo. Maybe after I finish a video, then I'll ask AI to summerize it, just to refresh my mind. Same with Ralston's books.

Humor, confidence, wittiness maybe. Ability to being vulnerable.

@cistanche_enjoyer I'd like to have a free time just to live without pressure and expectations, I think lots of money would allow that, at least for some time. So, the first thing is less stress and anxiety, because daily job comes with those two. Second, I'd pursue my own creative projects more freely, because when you work full-time and have some other things going as well, it's very hard to do that, realistically. Pursuing spirituality more seriously. Now I can't just take a month off from work to go and meditate for a month straight. I can't just go and take psychedelic journeys freely because what if those destabilize me and I'm not able to work for some time? It would create issues, maybe I lose my job which supports me and my family, you know, that kind of stuff. Yeah but to get to understanding God when you have 0 idea what that refers to, and if you aren't genetically gifted that you see God by default, you need to design a lifestyle that allows it, you must not be in a survival pressure cooker all the time. You can be, and still pursue it, I don't say it's not possible, we're just talking about in what ways having lots of money would make things easier logistically at least.

@Judy2 I also have that, and as people told to me, I've to stick with it for at least couple months to gain some momentum with the practice. Doing it here and there doesn't allow the mind and body practice enough to then make it more engaging / interesting, less-agitating. I think we just have to bite the bullet and sit through the agitation over and over and over again, day in day out, and that will recondition the mind a bit over months. Or else this agitation issue won't resolve itself.

@Natasha Tori Maru Yeah, do you think he will order any disclosure? I just watched this, and they show an interview with a neurosurgeon who reportedly spent 3–4 minutes with the Varginha alien and was able to communicate with it telepathically. The interview also appears in the new documentary, where he tears up while recalling the experience. He said there was so much compassion and love in its eyes that he had never seen anything like it before. They also claim that many people signed NDAs and that, if Trump were to protect them and release them from those agreements, they would publicly reveal everything.

@Natasha Tori Maru I don't think he meant that he's seen one, he just said that there must be one as the universe is so large. Btw, I wasn't aware that there is a new documentary called Moment of Contact: New Revelations of Alien Encounters (2025), anyone who liked Moment of Contact (2022) should watch it. I'm about to watch it now. It's on Amazon Prime.

@cistanche_enjoyer For me the reason is that if I do that, I won't have to wage-slave my way into 30s, 40s, 50s, etc. And be free with my own time and resources. That has like an infinite value.

For the past few years, I’ve been struggling to stay consistent with myself — with the promises I make to myself, with integrity, and with discipline. I’ve examined this many times and identified some fundamental issues that I’m working to fix. This journal will serve as public accountability while I build the foundation for the next phase of my life. I’ve just turned 30, and I now realize how little time I have and how easy it is to waste most of it. I need to take much more action than I did in my 20s. Currently, I’m struggling with addiction, I’m overweight, I do the bare minimum at my job as a software developer, I don’t exercise much, and I deal with some anxiety. I know how to fix all of it — and more. I know what to do to make my life unrecognizably better (at least to try my best), and inaction only makes me resent myself more. I know what to do. I just have to do it. This thread will help me stay accountable. I’ll be posting every Saturday with a report on the previous week. This is how it will go. Phase 1: 3 Months I’ve been overconsuming pornography and engaging in compulsive masturbation. Since I’m single and somewhat isolated, I need to control this habit. I will abstain from both to reset my dopamine reward cycle. I’ve been slacking off at work, so I need to refocus and concentrate more. I currently work in 45-minute blocks, then rest for a few minutes, repeating this 2–3 times a day. I want to increase this to at least 6 blocks. Work inconsistency has caused me to sleep very late or work late into the night. As I fix my work habits, my sleep habits should improve as well. My goal is to sleep at least 7 hours, from 12:00 a.m. to 7:00 a.m. I’ve gained a lot of weight. I’m currently around 105 kg and eat a lot of junk food. The plan is to build muscle and lose fat simultaneously until I reach 72–75 kg. Eat 1,800–2,000 calories with at least 160 g of protein Weight train at least 3 times per week Jog for 30 minutes at least 3 times per week Cut out junk food at least 90% of the time I work as a software developer, and the industry is changing rapidly. I need to keep up. I will invest at least 1–2 hours per day in studying, building side projects, or diving deeper into AI. Read books for at least 1 hour per day. Summary of Phase 1 No porn or masturbation No social media Limited YouTube/Reddit for recreation 6–8 daily 45-minute work blocks 1–2 hours of study 1 hour of reading Fixing sleep routine Weight loss: 1,800–2,000 calories 3x weightlifting, 3x cardio weekly Cut out junk food Phase 2: 3 Months On top of the foundation built in Phase 1: Add spiritual practices: Mindfulness meditation (breath-focused) and Kriya Yoga pranayama Add therapeutic practices such as shamanic breathwork, TRE (Trauma Release Exercises), and self-therapy journaling to work through unresolved trauma and issues from the past few years Continue weight loss and exercise — likely reaching target weight by the end of Phase 2 Continue reading and studying Allow masturbation at most once per week after the first 90 days, since more than that negatively affects my life Phases 3 and 4 I can’t say much about these yet. I imagine strengthening spiritual practices, making them more focused and prioritized, socializing more, and possibly starting to date — though dating may be too distracting at the moment, and I don't want it honestly since I've recently got out of a LTR. Phases 4+ Getting involved with psychedelics More socializing More dating experience Starting to work on additional income streams aside from my job Working on creative projects Traveling Meeting new people Exciting things — but first, the foundation. That’s the plan. I won’t plan further than this because planning is a trap for me. Planning gives me a false sense of accomplishment, but it isn’t real progress. Real accomplishment comes from daily execution — day in and day out. It’s that simple. I’ll update every Saturday. 52 updates total. Let’s see how far I go. See you next week.

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@Judy2 Maybe they just tough it out. What's the longest that you have run? For me it was 17km, and boredom wasn't an issue because something was happening every minute, if you try to notice the condition of your body, your breathing patterns, the current challenge (maybe slights uphill on the road), that makes more engaging. But aside to that, just accepting the boring part of it as well. Just imagine someone like David Goggins, or Andy Glaze or some ultrarunner who run days, not hours, there can't be any technique that they can use, maybe they start labelling colours for some hours but I can't imagine doing that for 40 hours or more. Maybe they just tough it out and that's where their strength is.

@Judy2 What I do is, if I have a long run like 10km (or even a short one), I split that distance into multiple chunks, like I roughly know a run around this block takes me 15 minutes, okay, then comes a long road that needs 20 minutes, and then a small uphill that's a bit tough for 10 minutes, etc, till the end of a run. That keeps it engaging because instead of full one hour+ goal, I have small 5-15 minute goals in my mind that I need to accomplish. Also, if you have smartwatch, you can track your pace, and try to improve in some way on each run, that also makes it more engaging. Not sure about treadmill though, it's boring for me as well. I have a treadmill at home and I just turn on some video on YouTube plus some music to keep the run engaging.

@Oeaohoo Yeah, as most of us have.

@Oeaohoo But it is a strong force, especially if one is inexperienced in sexuality and curious at the same time. Maybe that gets less important as we age. I mean, you might not want it to be one of top priorities, but you just can't help it. I guess that's where real maturity and cognitive / spiritual development comes into play. And also most people get married rather flippantly, who the fuck thinks about all these deeply before commiting? And then their real needs and motivations come up after years and that's when people get stuck.

@Oeaohoo But how do marriages work. Divorse rates is getting high (probably) each year, but there are couples who sustain marriages right? I mean, most of our parents did. But probably there's lots of variables there, having kids, shared families and relatives, shares liabilities, attachments, etc, that bind two people together, even if they aren't fully satisfied sexually or are fantasizing on other options. I'm just wandering when you are aware of these mechanism and don't lie to yourself about your needs, what's the best way to strategize this aspect of life. My conclusion was to just explore first to some degree, maybe a lot, and see where that takes you, maybe later in life you get a genuine satisfaction even sexually with just one partner for life, and that's it. But maybe not. What do you mean exactly? Soul-level?

@Oeaohoo Do you think that's true? How is it in your experience?