Snader

My female friend was cutting my hair as usual as she suddenly noticed some new grey hair. I panicked first, but then she said that I will become a cool silver fox soon and this future self-image came to my mind: So I calmed down.

About a month back I was walking on a market square towards home. It was pretty late so it was very quiet and peaceful. Suddenly a group of scout girls (around age of 6-8) ran to me wanting to sell me a fucking advent calendar. As a cheap but kind boy scout myself I didn't want to turn them down too cold, so I said ''I would love to buy one, but I don't have any cash, sorry'' (I assumed they don't have a method for electronic transaction, as they were so young). They said ''don't worry, we have plenty of payment options!'' after which they gave a signal to an adult far away, who then came to me with a fucking payment terminal. I ended up paying 15 euros for a stupid silly advent calendar, just because I was too kind and naive. So I was played like a bitch and it really got to me. That really reminded me of how sneaky people are to get your money. After that I've decided to be cold and concise everytime someone approaches me with merchandise and I've applied that to other intercourses as well, and haven't been fooled ever since. You can be kind (and you ought to), but it's wise to filter every agenda through a shit filter first, just in case.

As far as I remember 7 habits offered more practical tools on top of the mindset it promoted.

Yeah it's blunt but it's also clear and succinct, which as a means to communicate might be something worth pursuing, no?

Happens to me as well. If I read about a specific subject my mind tends to offer me a memory to which I can contrast that subject while I read about it and try to make sense of it. I guess it's just a common unconscious function we have to make sense of stuff, but to be conscious of that is completely another thing. I've also become conscious of something like that while playing the piano. Some quick flashes of memories or fictional scenarios appear every time I play a specific sound or a part of a song and it reappears every time I play the sound again, even though I put zero conscious effort to any thinking whatsoever. The scenarios change from session to session depending on what's going on in my life. A bit annoying sometimes.

I’ve managed to quit/minimize all the unhealthy drugs and time wasting activity by becoming busy with more important stuff and also by becoming disgusted by the untruthness of many of that stuff.

As we all know, life is hard. There is constant pressure from outside but also from within. We are trying to become better versions of ourselves while trying to figure out what we are in the first place. We have values, ideas, thoughts and sensations that inspire us, but which are continually challenged by the outside world, which then bounces back as self doubt, adding to the mental struggle of ones' identity and values. We cannot settle for the medium of what society expects from us, but we cannot diverge too much either, as we still need to pay our bills and satisfy our basic human needs to stay sane. There is also personal backlash when pushing too far too fast. So, im interested to hear from you about how you reconcile your life – if you feel there is something to be reconciled in the first place. Can you describe the metal process/(es) you go through? How do you justify or rationalise your action? What are your pitfalls? To what extend do you settle and sacrifice, and to what extend do you challenge? What are the struggles or areas of life that create the most turmoil in your psyche? As a bonus question: Do you feel it is your own mind or the society that is holding you back the most in life? This is a very broad topic and the questions are ambiguous, so don't take it too seriously. Just try to think about them deeply and share your thoughts. No right or wrong answers here.

Seems like a hard, but also a wise and practical mindset. Thanks!

Thanks for a totally different perspective! This thread wasn't meant for any non-dual or metaphysical discussion, but now that you poked, I might dive in just a little. I am aware of the dream I call life. I do know this doesn't matter at all and this whole play with all its seriousness is silly as fuck. Yes, I am a big clown here, but unless I decide to kill myself (which I will not), what should I do here? Are there better and worse ways to amuse God? When I mentioned spirituality, I wasn't referring to any school or ideology or any other construct. To me it's about the level of awakening I've embodied in relation to the human self I play. This typing is from the human self, who intuitively knows the Truth, but who cannot possible live to it 100%. All it can do is carefully install - out of wisdom and deep intuition - bits of that Truth in itself, until that Truth finally does its thing, or does not. Yes this is only game, but man what can I do? What should I do?

That's certainly an endeavor worth pursuing!

I also reflect back and think about the bright side of being born and raised in poor and disadvantaged conditions, but also the lucky side of having resources to avoid inheriting those conditions. I can imagine the mess I would be if I hadn't had those resources. That's a good point. Nothing wrong with complaining per se. I've recently turned a new chapter in my life and along with that I've started new endeavors. Those endeavors are investments towards my future, increasing my possibilities to build a life where I can live up to my values, at least a lot more than I've been able ever before. This process is mentally demanding, which is already detaching me from some more ''noble'' activities and state of mind that is important to me in a different way, but on top of that I'm forced to deal with different kind of human shit that kind of comes with the package. So as a spiritually wired person with relatively high level of consciousness, sensitivity, and criticality, I find it pretty exhausting to almost daily deal with stupid petty human bulsshit, fakeness and selfishess. But that's the cost here, nothing comes easy. I'm now delicately fine-tuning my life, including all the dimensions which it contains, to be able to go on without too big of an identity crisis. I thought it would be nice to ask here and get some perspective on the matter. Not just so that I could cultivate those perspectives, but also cause I'm genuinely interested in how people handle their lives in all its vastness.

Again, thanks for the comprehensive answer. There are many interesting threads there and I can recognize many themes reminding me of some of my own trajectories. I can definitely relate. To me it feels like pressure constantly close to my skin. And being aware of it to reject it seems to eats up lots of energy. That kind of appreciation seems to be rare. I've also tried to practice it more, to remember how entitled and fortunate I am, how little I'm really justified to complain about life. Do you believe you can break out one day?

Do you have any challenges in that process? What would you say that is making you to persist in that ongoing never-ending process?

Are that set of proper actions enough for you to fulfill your Dharma, or is there something more? How do you cope in life when you face obstacles and suffering in life despite the fact of following the principles? Do you ever start doubting the principles? That must be a great coping strategy, if your intuition and realization is just strong enough. In my experience human life usually tends to drastically challenge that frame of mind, loosening your grip.

Do you consider yourself living according to this standard?

We overcome the obstacles, yes. But after one, there is always another waiting for you behind the corner. I agree. As far as our human life is concerned and we are operating on that level, those things seem to be the only antidote to the suffering - especially selflessness.

@hyruga Sure. What I’m interested in is the experiences people have with those struggles and how differently they cope. Like you said, some feel they’re trapped while others do not. That by itself is pretty fascinating.

@LastThursday Thanks for sharing! I have few questions, if I may ask: 1) Is the sensation of feeling trapped rising from the fact of being a wage slave or is it more related to the lack of self-worth stemming from not ''being somebody''? 2) You said that among society it's your lack of willingness or ability that is preventing you to untrap yourself. Can you possibly describe that further; what is going on with your will and capability, how are those things operating with you to block you from taking action? I know it might be a tricky one to put in words. 3) You seem to take responsibility over your own life, which is great! But as you acknowledge society's partial role in your misfortune, don't you ever think society might have a role in your current situation of not being capable or willing to take action? I might sound like a therapist trying to lead you to some kind of realization about your life, but no, that's not my intend here. I'm just curious to understand.

Isn’t this a matter of preference?

@Leo Gura have you decided a more specific order or any logic to how you plan to proceed, on top of the least known to most known? Like categorizing all the countries by a factor, such as wealth, development, climate or whatever, or just go along as you discover good documentaries?

Your ursername is at least.

Haha I can imagine his doughter begging him to do this video with her and him finally breaking.

I bet this forum was created just to lead folks to the realization of the limits of their thinking and human language. 'Getting like-minded people together' was just a bait for the stupid human mind

You need to know the shit you talk about. That makes a huge deal. Also don't get fooled by what you see. I bet Leo does plenty of preparation and organizing work for his videos. Get to know your shit first, then have the courage and resilience to practice regularly. And remember, when it comes to communicating and articulating yourself, there will always be good days and bad days.

The slow progress speed, considering how much I practice and gain stress in the process.