Dlavjr

I have a female friend that's in a situation similar but way less extreme. She's been dating a guy for 4 years now and she hardly knows anything about the guy besides that he has two kids and is "trying to get his shit together", MAYBE she knows where he works at most. But she doesn't even know where he lives, at one point I believe he was living with the mother of his children and now she doesn't know. I've been trying to help her see for years that she's just a side girl to this guy, and that she's being used. I've tried every method, being harsh, being nice, trying to let her figure it out for herself, and at this point she even admits that she shouldn't be with him, but she doesn't have the strength to leave because she insists that she loves him "no matter what". Sometimes people gotta learn the hard way.

It's release. Sexual urges are distracting, not everybody wants to pursue sex but suppressing your sexuality can result in some serious damage to your psyche. Usually I go a few days to a week before I feel like I need to almost flush out the system in a sense, and porn just kinda makes it easier. Plus, watching women solo is, in my opinion, a beautiful thing because it's a lot less glorified and it's more of watching a woman please herself naturally, and it also doesn't really affect you view women or sex, at least not for me. I've never had problems with sex, or approaching women, or creativity. I'm a musician, I spend a lot of time practicing and studying music and I'm a pretty efficient guy, honestly the once or twice a week jerk off just kinda keeps my mind clear so I can stay focused on creating the vision I have for myself rather than waste time feeling lonely and wanting to pursue women romantically when I don't really have the time.

Nofap generally means abstaining from all orgasm entirely but I'm pretty sure most just abstain from masturbation. From what I've looked into, the idea is to pretty much repress all sexual urges, like don't even touch yourself, for 90 days, and it should "reset" you mind and reverse the damage of porn. I'm not for or against either side of the porn argument, I think porn is one of the slipperiest slopes because there are benefits to porn in moderation but it's extremely easy and common for people to become addicted, to the point that it's actually normal and expected. It's also dangerous that many people discover it so young, but what can be done about that? My initial question that I proposed in this chat is, does masturbation, with or without porn, really damage the average person as much as nofap says? Or is nofap really only beneficial to those that masturbate/watch porn excessively? A lot of what I've looked at from people that swear by nofap is just former addicts. I think it's to the same light that nobody in AA is gonna say "yeah enjoy alcohol in moderation", they're all most likely going to demonize it. They almost have to, because that's the only way they don't relapse. So I think nofap blows things out of proportion. A lot of the people I've spoken to about nofap that practice it just kind if assume that everyone that doesn't practice is a porn addict and jerks off every day twice a day.

The irony of all this is how defensive you are about your own beliefs. If you were enlightened and without ego, you'd be minding your own business enjoying the fruits of life that you speak of, rather than insulting people online. Don't try and control people by telling them the right way to go about their journey to self discovery. You're always on the journey, the fate of reality is to be on the journey for all eternity, experiencing in all forms and facets.

I feel like it's not necessarily if you jerk off so much as when, tbh. I think so long as you aren't addicted to it and you don't feel like you HAVE to make time to do it, it's not really a problem. So far, in doing nofap, I agree with all of you that I just feel like I'm repressing urges. Maybe that goes away, I guess I'll find out. I've only ever felt negative affects from masturbation if I do it excessively or if I do it prior to doing something that requires me to utilize a lot of energy. So like before a workout I'd say it'd be negative. But I feel like a lot of the effects that the nofap community warn you about are more so effects of the addiction.

I think that's really key to remember in this sort of discussion, everybody comes from somewhere different. There are obvious benefits to not masturbating or keeping it infrequent, but that doesn't necessarily demonize the act itself. I'd like to also add that I differentiate porn and masturbation. The two are often synonymous but they don't have to be. I've found there's a key difference in using or not using porn when masturbating, and that's worth noting. In my opinion, the most universally healthy route to go is to keep jerking off to a minimum, if you feel like you have to squeeze it into your schedule, or you prioritize it over other things or use it as some sort of reward, there's a problem. Also, I think the occasional 30-90 day break is probably beneficial, but at that point you might as well go all the way and do the full dopamine detox, as at the end of the day that's really what this whole thing is about. The real culprit is dopamine and how much you indulge and rely on it, if you pump your brain with as much dopamine-filled activities as your mind can possibly consume, then obviously there are going to be horrendous side affects, it doesn't just stop at porn. That being said, porn is one of the easiest possible ways you can access some of the highest levels of dopamine imaginable, so you have to be careful. I've definitely seen this and that's where a lot of my concerns arise when it comes to the legitimacy of the topic. A lot of it seems very aggressive and it also seems like the people doing nofap have a lot more problems that need to be solved alongside just porn, but a lot of them seem to feel that knocking out porn was all they needed. My personal gripe with it is that they don't take account people with differing backgrounds and differing minds, it's all based around addiction. I started this thread because I want to know if, as somebody that does not masturbate frequently and watches porn even less frequently, is nofap worth it? Are there still benefits, or is there really no difference? THAT'S what peaks my curiosity. It's very similar to how Alcoholics Anonymous is hugely beneficial to an alcoholic, but can somebody who just enjoys drinking for fun also benefit anything? In that particular case it's probably a no, but the nofap community strongly swears by a lot of benefits, and I want to see if the payout is universal or if it's only to addicts.

With the week alone that I haven't jerked off I've noticed a huge spike in my libido, just in that I find myself looking at women more often in public than I would normally. I'm also not a guy that's triggered by sexual imagery, after reading "The Way of the Superior Man" I learned a lot about appreciating women in all sorts of ways without lusting over them like an animal, so I guess it doesn't really make much of a difference. I'll keep the streak going as an experiment, keep an open mind. It's one less distraction anyways, I doubt I'll really suffer from not masturbating. There's certainly a level of focus and level- headedness that comes with not fixating on sex, I can see how the addiction and over-sexualization of women can change how you act towards them, but I think it depends on what it is your goals are. I'm curious to see how all this would play into a relationship but intend to stay single for a good while.

I got into researching nofap from researching dopamine detoxing, which is something I plan to integrate once a week. I'm not an overindulger at this point in my life. I certainly was as a teenager but nowadays I'm more sharply focused on my goals and aspirations and the hunt for a life purpose, and that precedes everything. I'll likely go for a 30 day nofap just to experiment with the benefits, maybe I'll come back with a follow up thread about what I experienced and if my opinions have changed.

I felt that was the case. So, bearing in mind that I'm not trying to start a debate and more so trying to learn and gather a more holistic view, do you think it might be possible that you feel so strongly about the negative affects of pornography because you might be biased as a former addict? I feel like you can replace porn with anything. Junk food, alcohol, video games, etc. If you're addicted to any form of stimulation, of course it will ruin you, but I don't feel it's necessarily as much of the fault of the substance as it is the affects of addiction. I'm not saying that porn is good. I understand it's negatives, trust me, I don't find it to be something worth indulging in and I see how it's damaging when you slip too far in, however I personally never experienced any of the horrors of it in my own life. Similarly to video games, a cookie, or a beer, I think the occasional jerk off is harmless. Whether or not it's beneficial is debatable, sure, but I guess it's the difference between a former alcoholic having a beer and having a beer with no history of abuse with that particular substance.

So far, after a week of not masturbating, I haven't really struggled with any urges. Sure I still randomly crave it, but I always have more important shit to do, I just never have time to sit and jerk off. Masturbation is pointless, but the way I see it, so are most recreational activities, but it's still healthy to do occasionally. There's nothing wrong with stress relief. My question to you is, are you coming from the perspective of an ex-porn addict?

I have hyperhidrosis. Before I got any sort of treatment I just used medicated deodorant and avoided tight shirts. Now, I do that in addition to being prescribed glycopyrrolate. I haven't done much research on the medication, but it's worked well for me and hasn't given me any side affects as of yet, been taking it for 2 1/2 months now. Some extra tips, I've noticed when I consume a lot of caffeine or hot beverages it causes me to sweat more, as well as excessive sugar. Overall, keep your diet in check. Also, the instinctive response to having excessive sweating is you're probably gonna want to keep your arms down as much as possible just out of being self conscious, try to avoid that lol it'll make it worse. Do you sweat exclusively in your underarms? Or are you excessively sweating elsewhere too? I got prescribed medication because I'll get excessively sweaty almost everywhere, but most dermatologists will just prescribe you with deodorant or suggest surgery if it's just your underarms.

Check out buff dudes on YouTube. They have a great bodybuilding book and tons of videos to go with it, with and without any equipment.

Only way to know for sure is to find out. It's not like there's anything wrong with it, you're the only one who's stigmatizing it and shaming yourself for it. What's so bad about being gay? And I don't think a finger in your ass is grounds for homosexuality.

Keep in mind that if you're starting from not exercising at all, any type of exercise will benefit you greatly. It's just like when I started losing weight, I was still eating like absolute shit, but by simple cutting out fast food and soda, I lose 20 pounds in a very short amount of time, just because for me personally that was a huge change at the time. Start with some brisk walks, or maybe some at home yoga. Especially if you work an office job and your body isn't used to much stretching, a little goes a very long way.

I did mainly exercise, once I started getting into the gym I got addicted to it, and now I feel terrible if I go more than a week without going. My gym addiction is what balanced out my constant diet relapsing tbph ? I have my diet way more under control now but for a while I'd spend 3 months eating great and then a month of eating like shit, so it made my journey far longer than it had to be. Agree 100%, I try to eat before I go to hang out with anybody because I know most of my peers aren't concerned with eating healthy. Cigs/vaping is my current battle. I'm at the point where I can avoid buying them but I can't help take them when offered to me. The worst part about my smoking addiction is for a while I tried to justify it by saying it helped me avoid overeating (which was a lie). The addicted mind is extremely deceiptful and tricky, it certainly takes incredible amounts of patience to rewire your habits and drop your attachments.

Tobacco companies pretty much did exactly that for years. Addiction = profit. Health has been getting pushed but not enough to where it's affordable for everyone, lower class families end up feeding their kids crap food out of convenience and because it's just cheaper. Not to mention most cultures have the mindset of stuffing yourself being equal to being well fed, and being lean is equal to being scrawny. I still have a bit of a gut and plenty of fat to lose but people like to poke fun at me by calling me skinny and scrawny, and my family tells me that I need to eat more and I look like I'm starving myself. It's gonna take a long time before people are ready to accept that eating shouldn't be put on such a massive pedestal the way it is.

How often are you having sex? If you're getting numb to it then having it frequently is only going to add fuel to the fire. If you hold out from sex for a bit, it might bring back some excitement or at least make it feel less mundane.

It's nice to hear someone else who can relate. I've tried the special deodorants, even had one prescribed, and it didn't help. I'm not on any medications at all, and I definitely feel that anxiety makes it worse. It's a paradox because I get so anxious about having the stains show that it makes me sweat, but even when I try to keep my mind off the thought and stay present and calm, I still end up looking like I just got out of the gym. During the summer all I'm comfortable wearing is sleeveless shirts. I'd love to know how it feels to be able to put any shirt on and not feel like I'm just gonna ruin it with sweat stains. The tiniest bit of heat will trigger it, even hot foods/drinks. I plan on consulting a dermatologist soon, I'll report back to this thread if I find a solution that works. I've heard of the Botox you can do, I've also heard of the wipes and apparently there are pills that can work as well. Unfortunately for me the sweat isn't exclusively happening in my armpits, my feet get sweaty as well as my forehead, and the forehead sweat triggers acne, which is another problem I need to tend to.

I've yet to talk to a dermatologist, but before I spend an arm and a leg on treatment, what are ways to combat excessive sweating? I suspect I have hyperhidrosis, because even during these winter months, I could be walking around in a muscle shirt and still be dripping with sweat under my arms and on my feet. I want to avoid surgery, I've tried prescribed deodorant but that's about it. The issue frustrates me and makes me very self conscious, walking around with giant pit stains during all types of climate. Any tips would be appreciated.

Congratulations! Some of it might be water weight, but your body sheds the most fat when you first start a diet or start exercising just because you made an abrupt change. When I initially started losing weight I went from 225 to 198 in 6 months, but it took me a year to get down to 175. A couple years later, I'm now 150. That's not without my fair share of hiccups though, which is bound to happen, you won't stay perfect all the time but as long as you keep yourself oriented on your goals and get back on track asap, you'll be fine.

My mistake. I agree on long distance not being a good idea. Sometimes things just fall into place for a time though, let that experience be a reminder to just go for things. Moments like that happen and often times people spend too much time analyzing what should be done about it rather than actually experiencing it. I've been in that situation before where women liked me but I was so used to being turned away that I hesitated, and by the time I gathered courage and opened up I'd lost my chance. Happens with jobs, too. Self esteem goes a long way.

The real question is, are you going to do anything about it? It's great to hypothesize about "if it's intuition" and "if there's some sort of spark between you two" but until you actually approach her and find out for yourself, you're just daydreaming.

Interesting, I'd not considered that, I'll give it a shot. I do notice I frequently sweat immediately when waking up before consuming any caffeine, however I might have more of a dependency than I realized, so I'll give it a shot regardless.

No, closest thing to a stimulant I consume on a regular basis is caffiene

The more I delve into spirituality, the more open minded I become. In the past, chakras are something I've been skeptical about and pretty much entirely dismissed as being some hippie bullshit. However, the concept keeps popping up throughout the forum and in videos I watch and books I read regarding spirituality, so I'm starting to become curious of the legitimacy. If I want to learn about chakras and how to pass through each, what are some of the more reliable sources of information for it? Are chakras a necessary method of personal development? I'm keeping my mind open.