Roy

You are trolling, right? I like the approach, but the content could use improvement.

I have no fears. I am true to myself.

I don't want this, nor have any leanings towards any party (I'm Canadian). So don't ban me for my prediction haha. But yea Trump will win again sadly. - He will dumpster Biden in the debates. Have no doubt about that. It will be worse than vs Hillary. - The BLM protests and riots are making regular people sway right. Just pay close attention to the culture war and you'll notice it. - Bernie lost AGAIN and many of those lefties will not want to settle for Biden. - Self-fulfilling prophecy; Everyone is scared of Trump winning a second term, it will come true. - Most political parties win because they offer a vision for the future that people want, the Democrats and lefties general attitude and plan is more about making Trump lose then giving America a proper direction. This kind of approach almost always loses. People want something to vote FOR, not AGAINST.

I know you don't like me from that other thread but anyways; Marriage is an antiquated idea. The brutal truth is anybody can leave any relationship, at any time, for any reason. No piece of paper, institution, or words will EVER bind that freedom. This renders marriage a farce, because there is an overwhelming social pressure that forces people to be naive to this truth. This can open up a whole host of problems that can rot the integrity of ANY marriage - because if either partner ever gets a sliver of doubt at any point it can make them feel trapped, resentful, and that they have to stay in the relationship because they made it "official". This negative motivation will not sustain things, only positive motivation can. Of course by all means if you've been in a relationship a long time with someone, and your life trajectories line up it can be an amazing thing! Just know that marriages that last until death especially these days are incredibly rare, you have to look around and ask yourself. Can you really pull it off? The fact you haven't been in a relationship yet means you probably shouldn't commit to that idea yet until you've had some years experience, so you can really know what you want for yourself. However I don't see why people who are in love can't commit to each other for life without having to sign some government document and throw a $15,000 party. The idea that it doesn't "count" unless you get married is a ridiculous social standard. If it goes south you are fucked. The possessions and finances are never split fairly, and it's a stressful nightmare dealing with all the paperwork and legal stuff. Speaking for myself, but I don't need anyone nor the government to tell me if I'm truly committed to someone. If my companion and I want to stay together for life we will discuss and it and then do it.

It's just an observation of something blatantly obvious. Nobody intellectually honest would look at the modern sex industry and say it's not overwhelmingly male-centric in it's interests. As @Moon said though with the advent of OnlyFans and other online alternatives the landscape is changing and the power is shifting.

They don't make that stuff often because the market is too small for it. The majority of porn is produced and consumed by the common denominator - piggish selfish men who just want to get off, they don't care for things like intimacy or emotional connection. Ironically those things are exactly what they need and what they really want deep down, they just don't know it. In the future as society evolves we will start to move away from Stage Red/Orange misogynist male-centered porn, and a more accepting Stage Green "feminine-gratifying" porn will move in to take it's place. This will also be paired with the legitimization and decriminalization of sex workers, and women in these industries getting more rights and being treated better more broadly in social culture.

@Leo Gura Probably hard to answer this, but how worthwhile do you think this investment has been? Have they made you feel incredibly healthy compared to what you felt before, or what you would have without them?

Had sort of a realization, just wondering if it means anything or leads anywhere. Basically I had the thought after reflecting on what Leo has said about "everything is pure imagination". Which I understand conceptually, but haven't directly. Still, after sitting on it for a while I noticed something; Isn't the ability of complex organisms like human beings to imagine things essentially direct/pure evidence of getting a taste or fraction of what being God is? Of course our imaginations don't appear to be that powerful, as the imaginations remain in our heads and don't manifest in what we traditionally call "reality". It took billions of years just on this particular planet for life to evolve to a point where there are living things that have "imagination". While all of what we consider non-living things don't have this ability (as far as things appear). This process of evolution seems to be moving in a linear fashion >>>>> From nothing being able to imagine >>>>> To more and more things being able to. If this line reaches it's conclusion eventually we (or something else) become so powerful at imagination that a singularity is reached, and there is an inflection point where God basically holds a mirror up to itself through it's own imagination (us), then once the "gig" is up so to say, it starts the process all over again? Is this what you meant @Leo Gura when you said "God is so powerful it tricks itself into forgetting what it is."? So what we call reality is simply an infinite oscillation of God forgetting and remembering? Sorry if this is all over the place, or I don't know what I'm talking about. It's just hard to articulate these things through only language.

You are good looking to me mate!

Self-contained spheres of pure uniqueness.

I've only ever done Salvia, but it's been a timeless habit of mine to stop and become consumed by the beauty of things since I was little. That should be a prescription from Doctors for everything, "Stop at least once a day and notice the beauty in something." For example I'm packing to move soon (driving to Vancouver Island across Canada), and things are everywhere on my desk right now, I'm mesmerized by the hand sanitizer sitting here. The way the air bubbles are suspended calmly, looks like planets to me. Sorry to hijack your post a bit haha.

About 3-4 dates will let you know basic compatibility, and how well the relationship flows. If it doesn't feel natural and easy to be with them, and you haven't had sex, by this point you probably aren't a good match. Within 4-6 months people start to slack on the "show" they put on, and you get to understand them more deeply, and see their flaws. By this time you should find out if they are a good long term partner. Relationships are worth it, not only is the companionship great but you will come to understand learn a lot about yourself, not just the other person. Not every relationship lasts forever though. Either you break up at some point, or go to the grave with them, there is no in-between. That's ok though. That doesn't take away from how worth while it is.

I would man up and apologize it would be the mature thing to do, regardless of her reaction or if she accepts it. You will feel better at the very least.

It's not an inherently offensive term on the surface (obviously), however it does have a level of hidden maliciousness in it, even if the people saying it aren't aware of it. Let's be honest here for a second - Nobody who is preaching this phrase is doing it because of a genuine humanitarian concerns for social justice. These people were nowhere to be fucking seen at all protesting or trying to consistently spark social change for all the decades leading up to what is happening now. It's a reactive smart-ass response so they feel better about having been so passive, lazy, and deliberately ignorant to the real and existing racist and discriminatory problems that have been festering under the surface of society, and are now bubbling up. As well to one up the blacks for getting all "uppity" and wanting to be treated better (which is justified), and because they fundamentally misunderstand what BLM is about (not that it's a FLAWLESS movement). I believe Joyner Lucas said it best in his song, "I'm Not Racist" which I recommend everyone listens to; "Screaming All Lives Matter is a protest to MY protest, what the fuck is that?"

This case is the perfect example of the absurd depths of bad faith and ignorance people are willing to go to in the political divide while being totally unconscious of the fact they are participating in it. Should a 17 year old have deliberately traveled to a volatile protest with a gun? NO, obviously that was an extremely poor decision and he should not have been there, despite whatever good intentions he displayed in the videos prior to the shootings. Let the buildings burn and have legitimate authorities like emergency response deal with it. He was clearly out of his lane, just like many of the protesters that want to abuse the opportunity of these riots/protests to get away with criminal juvenile behavior and hide behind the good people trying to spark genuine change. However he absolutely is justified in defending himself from charging attackers carrying weapons or not if he is trying to escape and retreat from the situations as it clearly appears he was doing in the available videos. It's not like any of this should have been a surprise, he is openly carrying a large gun on his body in plain sight. Anyone who sees that and is still willing to attack him should be assumed to be willing to escalate the force against him to equal or greater than what his weapon is capable of. You play stupid games, you win stupid prizes. His vested interest was clearly in survival like anyone else's would have been if they were in his shoes. To say he should have submitted himself to an angry armed mob out of some appeal to higher virtues is fucking absurd. Anybody who actually thinks they would override their survival instincts and do the opposite of what he did in that situation is either being dishonest or massively overestimating themselves. It's just easy to say because you're in the safety vacuum of being behind a screen. If you actually would do it I guess have fun being beaten close to death or executed by the mob pussy??? There is no other way to interpret this situation given all the evidence. It's just stupidity in every direction from all parties involved and a shitty set of circumstances, once again fueled by rampantly incompetent police. What's making it even worse is the inability of so many to be impartial and honest about these events, it just adds gasoline to the fire because everyone is so scared to think for themselves and wants to be nestled in the comfortable and delusional warmth of doubling down on one side of the isle or the other.

Don't react. Being reactive is a weakness and the opposite of being grounded and tempered. Let go of attachment to results and outcomes. Don't allow circumstances in the world to alter your life significantly.

lol............ reminds me of this old meme. https://www.reddit.com/r/thanksimcured/comments/9kwes7/just_stop_being_depressed_oh_thanks_im_cured/

Doesn't really matter what side you're on in this issue, this is a hilarious non-statement. There is no such thing as a "right" to self-defense, it doesn't exist as something to be handed or given. People are going to defend themselves regardless in any situation, because we all have the exact same modus operandi; Survival. This is more fundamental than any context, morals, or laws that you think will or "should" influence a situation.

I think a bit part that's getting overlooked is that it's too easy to become a cop, especially in the states. The training is too easy and too short. There isn't enough vigorous screening happening. Of course racist culture, stereotyping, etc exist and play into it quite a bit, but a lot of these incidents happen because of pure incompetence and inexperience. You shouldn't be allowed to even APPLY to the police force until you're at MINIMUM 28 or 30 years old in my opinion, with some kind of career background in a related field and extensive experience dealing with emergency situations. 25 year old hot heads with no life experience need not apply. Think about it, you need to train 8-10 years for some medical professions just to be given the chance to HEAL and SAVE peoples lives, but only are required a tiny fraction of that investment before you're handed the tremendous power and authority to be able to TAKE a life as a police officer. Something is backwards and fucked up here.

This basically sums it all up. Nothing to really learn from this incident.

You can probably screen for values compatibility using SD, but that just depends on how neurotic you are about having someone around the same level as you. Don't let SD taint your possibilities and become a limiting belief about who you can be with. Love transcends all stages. A perfectly healthy and functional relationship can happen between a Stage Blue and Stage Yellow person. Opposites attract as they say. Keep in mind Spiral Dynamics is a model meant primarily to map groups, not individuals. People are incredibly unique and you will find contradictions within them despite an overall affinity to a particular stage.

What I most likely have is dysthymia. Which is kind of a chronic low grade depression that can dip low once in a while, but it can mostly be talked through and rationed out of, as a lot of it is just bad logic and some victim pathology like you mentioned. I'm physically healthy and don't really have any chemical imbalances, though I'm sure some SSRI's would give me a boost. I can function pretty well without them though and can put up with it. It might be with your friends that their brains need the medication because of a clinical diagnosis of chemical imbalances. If they are so sick that it is making it impossible to function in daily life like going to school or holding a job down it's probably a good idea to take something to provide a baseline stability, then they have their energy freed up on doing to the next steps to get better. This probably isn't the best analogy but think of it like having a hurt leg. They might be able to push through the pain and technically "walk", but it's probably best they use crutches for a while. Except in this case instead of physically being unable to walk, it's neurologically. I think there is a tendency in spiritual communities to backlash and demonize Western medicine instinctively because it becomes a lot easier to spot it flaws as you learn about the alternatives. Of course there is corruption among companies that sell dangerously powerful medication or overcharge people, but a lot of it exists for a reason and gets rigorously tested so you know it works. Just maintain that skepticism to carefully pick out what will work and couple it with trying alternative medicine as well. Don't throw the baby out with the bath water, so to speak.

If tests show your body critically needs it then I don't think it's a problem to take medication, there just has to be timed plan to eventually get off or transition. As well as pair it with other healing methods. But yea talk therapy all the way. I've never taken anything for my depression and never will when talk therapy and personal development do so much more for far less.

Focus on what you want to do, and getting good/successful at it. That should already be more important than any person, it's your sustenance in life. Pour yourself in that so your thoughts and energy are going into the present/future, not the past. Don't be jealous of her, be glad you got to share part of your life together. Remember and reflect on that. If you truly loved her then you want the best for her no?