Roy

Those are all degrees of sharpness of the same blade.

I used to get anxious and had a neurotic feeling I had to come up and plan all these crazy ideas to be impressive, but then I realized it's simply not worth the investment to a stranger and to make such a big deal out of it. 9/10 times I just suggest for a walk in a park or to hike a nature trail, and either have a snack at a coffee shop before or after depending what time of day it is. It's a two part date that costs $5-10 max for a coffee + gas, and there is less pressure to be talking constantly when you're walking. If you're meeting them for more than a first date that's when you arrange dinner reservations or to go to some event.

Women can be skittish, elusive, flakey, and highly indecisive creatures. This is just the nature of things. You don't take it personally when you step in dogshit right? You just accept it might happen when you step out and decide to walk in a world where there is dog shit on the ground. Don't blame yourself when women behave like women. Simply keep going and you will get your results man. It could just be bad luck - people are busy in the summertime - etc. Exactly how many phone numbers VS numbers of dates have you had since you started in May? Have you been keeping track? I've gone on about 20 1st dates since May 19th, only 3 of them have resulted in a 2nd date so far. This shit is hard man. Keep your head up! I bet what's going to happen is sooner than later you'll meet that girl that clicks with you and you'll be in a relationship and ecstatic . Patience + effort, and good things will come my friend.

@Vzdoh Not everyone starts the "race" of life at the same gunshot. The reason many people are on here spending "countless hours theorizing" is because they trying to fill a deep hole in their understanding from not having the luck of having a proper upbringing, or trying to untie an extremely corrupt knot of confusion in their minds. These limiting beliefs and deficiencies can go down very core of the their being. As in the suffering has made up most of their experience in their existence. They don't know what things could be like if they were better. It's difficult to navigate out of dangerous waters to the shore if you don't have a lighthouse. They are here to find out that lighthouse even exists. It's not as easy as just going and "doing it". That's honestly just a simpleton thing to say and a complete nothing sandwich. Of course the reason you might not understand fully is if you started from a position of privelege, which you did by your own admission. Everyone has to work hard to reach a certain set of results yes, but you have to appreciate some simply need to work harder than others based on the foundation (or lack thereof) they were given in life. When you tell someone to "just do X bro quit being a victim!" In such a sterile and binary way its going to be really hard for them to take it on seriously. Especially when and I'm sorry to say this, it's coming from that good looking babe who is going on an egoic speil about herself. It just comes off as patronizing and cringy. Humans, and particularly vulnerable ones need more nuanced connection, not a set of math formulas preached at them. Not to mention it will never be as easy as just doing it when you have a problem like being too short. Which while isn't a big deal in the context of our spiritual existence, poses a large problem within the judgement of our low consciousness culture. People grappling with what are essentially handicaps need a higher quality specialized form of advice and need to resonated with first. Or it'll just fall on deaf ears or even make the problem worse.

I've always been a fan of art and creative endeavors for as long as I can remember - Whether by collecting things, browsing shops endlessly, making my own things, or listening to music like an Audioslave almost every day. It's always been apart of my life, but recently I've noticed something has been clicking and I've reached new depths of appreciation and enjoyment of it... I've been revisiting music that I used to listen to as a teenager and even quite recently, and while I was certainly a fan then and couldn't shut up about it - now it's like a completely different thing. The lyrics and meaning of some pieces have been utterly re-contextualized. In some cases I find myself simply crying at how beautiful it is, like I've heard all these words before but now I understand them in their essence and it's totally penetrating me. Sometimes left thinking how the hell could I have missed this all these years??? I have no other way to describe it, in some cases it simply feels like a mental orgasm. I've been at this work for about 4 years now in some capacity. I'm guessing gaining deeper insights and expanding my consciousness has indirectly revealed some things to me that I couldn't see before? I'm wondering has anyone else noticed this phenomena in their life? I'd like to hear your experiences on this.

40+ year olds, and especially 50+ year olds really know what they are doing in the bedroom. So if you can find the right one.... oh boy lol. The best blowie I ever had was from a woman I met in the grocery store (not at the store mind you). I was 23 at the time I think she was 42. She made a mockery of my usual stamina lmao, bitch. I've always had a bit of a soft spot for women a little older than me. They are just more sure of themselves and more chill overall. Just my experience. I would recommend giving it a shot.

Yep! And most men won't jump over it.

It's entirely in your capacity, do not believe you can't even if it feels like it. What you are actually capable of vs what your mind is telling you are completely different things. Focus all your efforts on finances, resources, and career/job experience so you have more opportunities out in the world. That means no more games thinking about relationships or other crap. It's all distractions you can worry about later once you're out of there. It really sucks but sometimes your path in life means leaving some people behind, or at least distancing yourself. This is YOUR life, you need to prioritize your own happiness and well being before anyone else. Also don't get this idea that you NEED to move to a big city like London or New York. There are plenty of affordable smaller-mid size cities across North America and Europe that have plenty of jobs and don't charge criminal amounts for living space. You cannot change or control your family, but you can change and control Preety.

Do not give in! Be strong, like Sir Galahad!

The fact you're able to resist having sex with someone who is questionably/considerably underage for you because it feels wrong makes you a rare man, because 9/10 guys would fuck her. So just don't do it, find someone else.

Guys lets keep conversation on the topic instead of getting into it about each others person lives. Remember we are here to develop, not bicker.

Congratulations, you just moved yourself up into the 99th percentile of all men on the planet

I will go to the grave not truly grasping why anyone would want to drink decaf coffee. I can understand decaf soda... but decaf coffee? Really lol?

Something like this, the magnitude of it just makes me tear up. Especially in the context of why it was made. From the 2016 climate change documentary, "Before The Flood".

How would you even know? I feel like even when people try to do studies, participants would just lie and scew the data, or in friendships and in private relationships people will lie because they don't want to be judged. I don't really trust any statistics I read, it's kinda left to our best guesses based on the individual. And even the studies that do get published usually don't take into account the generational differences. The invention of smartphones/dating apps and overall increasing materialism/shallowing of western culture probably increased the average number of partners for everyone now compared to idk 40-50 years ago?

Sounds like she's got a lot of healing to do and should probably talk to a sex therapist or psychologist. Should also get off the LSD too.

This place is for self-improvement. Not a place you get to dump garbage doomer thinking, and stir in resentment. I had to lock this thread because it's clear it's utterly useless and unproductive. In fact let this locking serve as a PSA to everyone on this sub-forum, men and women alike. Y'all need to step up your game. I see way too many arguments and clashing here between the genders, and general unwillingness to understand each other, and it's really affecting the quality of this place. We are all human and two sides of the same coin, so use this place to open your mind and take the opportunity to learn, instead of behaving like elementary school kids. And for OP and anyone who think like that;

All of this stuff is not gospel, it's just ideas. Find out what is real through your OWN direct experience, and trust that. If something feels wrong or off, then go learn about what you're missing and only use those ideas to inform your experiences, not taking them as a set of instructions. Your personal experience > anything you read here.

What do you mean by this?

Don't beat yourself up too much @Javfly33. The ego is a hard thing to tangle with. It's always a work in progress and you're going to have downturns, relapses, and rough patches. It's all apart of the development process. What is important is maintaining that constant fire to keep GOING! Progress, not perfection, as they say. I'm in a pretty good spot now, but if I told you or this forum what I did in the months of April/May you'd probably all completely revise any opinions and perceptions you had of me You are not alone.

Had the exact same problem with my last long term partner. But I burned that insecurity out very quickly > It's culturally conditioned patriarchal selfishness is what it is. Recognize that within yourself so you can let go and move on. It will take a bit of time but eventually you won't care anymore, because she will be yours (at least for the duration of the relationship). Realize you cannot change their past or who they are, so all that's left is to love and accept them as they are now (or not). Also stop talking about it and asking questions if you aren't getting anything out of it. Some things are better left unsaid and just because you're in a partnership with someone doesn't mean you need to know every single little detail or secret in their life.

@StarStruck Most girls won't want to go on dates if they know literally next to nothing about you. Subconsciously safety is always in the back of their mind, as it should be. Give them some time to vet you. You want to ask for a date somewhat quickly yes, but don't just crack a joke or two and then say hey let's meet! Treat them like human beings and show some interest. Ask what they do for a living, hobbies, where they came from etc. and share a bit about yourself so they know you aren't a psychopath lol. It's a fine balance. You are talking to a LOT of women though and getting a shitload of practice, so you'll figure it out

I've only ever taken Salvia once. 18 years old wet behind the ears. Was a fun experience becoming a literal couch and a TV for 5 minutes lol. Basically confirmed my suspicions at that age that there is radically different potential states of being compared to just regular sober consciousness. There was no profound insights or spiritual epiphanies on Salvia for me. It was basically just a complete raping of my visual field and motor function/sense of physicality (disappearing) .

Is it wise? Maybe. Will it backfire? Perhaps. Is it necessary? Absolutely. This is going to be divisive, but I don't care and I'm going to say it anyways - Sometimes stupid people need to be coerced not only for their own good, but for the greater good. It's like Sadhguru said about smoking, "It's not that smoking is bad or wrong. It's just that it's simply a stupid thing to do." Not getting a vaccine against a rampaging contagion is simply a stupid thing to do, sorry.