Roy

Think again. Every moment you spend seeking validation and avoid being challenged is a moment taking you further away from grabbing whatever issues you may have by the root and ripping them out.

This entire poll and all your other preaching threads are just pointless mental masturbation and a distraction from you taking action and addressing your own deficiencies and insecurities. AS IF anybody can inform or dictate you on what your perfect sex life is. That's insane. If you want to find out the answer to that question - start dating, go clubbing, get a girlfriend, hire some sex workers, etc.

From my anecdotal experience in myself and what I've seen in other people. Casual sex is harmless if done sparsely, maybe a few times a year at most. If it's done regularly though or deliberately in place of relationship sex it can get dangerous. A lot of people can end up getting hurt either emotionally or physically, and it can be psychological damaging for one's ability to form proper relationships. You are playing fire basically, so don't be surprised or complain when you get burned. I have always been extremely open and liberal towards sexuality but my intuition is starting to naturally scale this attitude back. What I'm observing in society from birth rates collapsing, family systems becoming broken and warped, marriage being an essentially pointless institution and life event, and just the general unhappiness/anger in everyone. It's leading me to feel like we are fucking things up and really have no idea what we're doing as a culture in this aspect lol. We thought we could handle the responsibility that comes with this freedom, but it's pretty obvious we can't. We'd be better served to admit that and calm things down for a while in my opinion. Of course people can do what they want, I won't judge or support anybody trying to stop them. The world is already overpopulated as it is, I'm not really that concerned about there being less children in the grand scheme. I'd also like to note I find it really interesting that every casual sex relationship I've ever had or seen other people have, has had a 100% collapse rate. One person always catches feelings and wants to form a deeper relationship. Although I can't prove it, I think this speaks to something sacred or important about the nature of intimacy and sex, and that we ought to respect it a bit more and not throw it around as simply a tool for our own pleasure.

Don't be an idiot, just be responsible find it at place you're going or get someone else to. I'm locking this thread because we don't need people encouraging potentially illegal behavior. If you want to take psychedelics that's great, but don't make a mockery of it by entertaining juvenile stunts, or because you can't stand being sober and bored on a plane for a few hours. It's these sorts of things that delay psychedelics and other substances from being fully legalized and accepted in mainstream culture.

Alright, but let's try to keep everything private out of respect yeah? It's not a competition, and whatever someone else does doesn't justify you responding in a similar way. Who cares what she did, it doesn't matter. This is your personal development. I'm sorry that things didn't work out though, I know it sucks. Try to learn what you can from the experience so the next one is even better.

Yikes man, should not have done that. That doesn't send a good message. It's ok to be confused or need help, since we all do at some point, but you shouldn't have shown her what other people are saying about it. It communicates a few things; - That YOU aren't decisive and don't even know what you want. Which she won't find attractive and makes her even more ok with being unsure herself. - "Hey look all these people think you're being silly, annoying, xyz, etc.!" (immaturity) - Also shows you don't respect the privacy of the relationship, which I imagine deep down she's a little uncomfortable with even if on the surface she doesn't seem so. Also I kind of overlooked it but I'm going to take down the picture of you two since it kind of against the rules here, since people not using the forum can't really consent to their information being shared. Just try to conceal peoples identities in the future, (no names/addresses/pictures). Refer to them with fake names or acronyms. This will sound a little callous but it helps to be made re-aware of something that is quite obvious given your situation. You are in college dude, a new girl will come around the corner in the next 15 minutes if you go looking, so don't get too hung up on just one. This is the time and place to be loose and free and open!

No my brain just works in cheesy analogies............... mmmmm, cheese.

You are just going to hurt yourself (and her) by holding onto the idea that she'll stay with you, even for a while. She already told you no, then maybe, then yes. Sorry to say but all of that = no. The thing about love is it's like a butterfly, you can't control it. You've just got to keep your hand open and if it stays on your hand for a while, that's great. And if it ends up leaving, that's fine too. But you can never close your hand or it will just leave, and if your hand is closed it might never land there in the first place. I'll tell you from experience. The best thing you can do for both of you to grow, is let her go even if it hurts. Reflect on the time you had, enjoy your summer, let her enjoy hers. Keep in touch if you want, but go and find someone who is ready for what you want instead of trying to make her decide to agree to what you want against her own feelings.

It's just an extra like to use, nothing special. Don't invest too much time or energy into apps (and definitely no money), it's just a convenient tool to lands a lot of dates and sort the wheat from the chaff. Tinder is kinda garbage though, Bumble is really the only app worth using.

MMA was awesome

There are a lot of games I've played and enjoyed, but if you put a virtual (or real) gun to my head to pick one; Final Fantasy X

That's awesome, who was your favorite player? I spent WAY too much time wanting to be good at StarCraft, got Grandmaster in SC2 as Terran and then had to quit because it wasn't even fun anymore, playing was like going to work

It's probably better to keep your hands clean and just not allow open discussion of sourcing. People will be posting sketchy, fake, or virus filled links, and naïve newbies will suffer for not knowing any better. If people want to find out how or where to get substances, they can just private message each other or google it. Allowing it will damage the integrity of the forum. My opinion is this should be a high quality tight knit place that can discuss radical things, but also follows the rules and some set of principles.

Damn if I knew he was gonna do basically everything I suggested I would have asked for a lot more hehehe.

This is my favorite song of all time, and I don't think it will ever change. His name is Ryan Corrigan. He grew up in my hometown of Huntsville, Ontario (Canada). My best friends mom used to babysit him when he was just little, and said it was easy to take care of him because he just liked to sing and mess around with instruments for hours. Gotta start early! I went and got front row seats to see him live in early 2020 a few weeks before the lockdowns. It was an amazing live show, he was playing drums and singing his lungs off.

You reminded me of the funniest thing ever. Did you get that from this?

Yea the journal section seems to be a hot point for moderation, it probably makes up 20% of reports and issues on this forum. Simply adding a "delete comment" button for journal owners would make a large positive impact. I understand it can be therapeutic for people to journal in a public blog like way, as they are letting emotions out and might be looking for feedback they wouldn't get journaling alone. Though letting anybody chime in opens the door for a lot of harassment and trolling. It's fine if people bicker and disagree in the Politics or Dating subforum, but don't go shitting on people in their own journals where they are sharing sensitive things about themselves. It's just like a, dick move man.

When I was 9 or 10 I went to a summer camp. My sister (14 or 15) was a counsellor there so naturally I wasn't on my best behavior lol. I remember one of the other counsellors, a teenage boy started to pick on me and abuse his power. I can't remember if it was because I provoked him or something else, but I remember my sister came to defend me from him even though I didn't really get along with her and was probably making her job harder than it had to be. I remember that feeling of protection and love quite well, that she had my back unconditionally.

I have some ideas for changes @Leo Gura, but this is just what I would do, take it for what you will: - Change "Self-Actualization" to "Practical Self-Help", advertised so people can get more straight forward answers to (generally) straight forward questions. For people who aren't ready for esoteric, advanced, or spiritual concepts. If someone asks for basic advice like goal setting, the answers in the section shouldn't be anything like, "you need to wake up to God lul". - Remove Psychedlics from "Meditation, Consciousness, Enlightenment, Spirituality", and give it it's entire own section. - Add Culture to the name tag of "Society, Environment, Government, Politics" - Move "High Consciousness Resources" to the "Self-Help Product & Book Reviews" section, or move them up. They should be combined. - Add Finances to "Life Purpose, Career, Entrepreneurship", additionally give Life Purpose it's own section maybe. Since there is a course on it and it's a big part of the Actualized ethos. - Also some sort of privacy lock for journals would be a great feature. So you can block it from being publicly viewed, or invite/block specific people from reading/participating. - As well some sort of highlighted neon sticky post for the Serious Emotional Problems section about suicide and self-harm would be good. Just with some basic protocol about what the reader should do if feeling unstable, links to suicide hotlines, etc.

While consciousness and expansion of concern does have some correlation with Spiral Dynamics, it is also a system that describes power and effectiveness of each stage in conquering the material world. Collective tribal society can be quite limiting, those straying from the group will be ostracized, and questioning tradition is taboo. These kind of social constraints hold back the potential of incredible individuals, who can see things the group can't and really just "know better". As @Akashic said above Red is more realistic, they will find things that simply work better, and a strong red leader will inspire others to follow them to help create and reap those results. The history of the Roman Empire is a great example of Red/Blue emergence, they grew to annihilate and assimilate all the Purple tribes around them. Intelligent generals, leaders, etc. figured out more effective ways to organize societies and wage war. Also keep in mind we tend to have quite a highly romanticized view of indigenous peoples because of the way liberalism has become mainstream culturally and in academia. Our ancestors did a lot of terrible things and we need to find ways to remedy that, but if you dig into the history of those cultures and their history too I'm sure it won't be hard to find equally terrible discoveries. First Nations, Natives, Indians, and Indigenous peoples all have their own toxic elements and disruptive ways of behaving. Anywhere there is humans, you will find low conscious and corruption. Let's say for a thought experiment the civilizations of North America advanced and organized faster than the Old World. It's likely if they had sea capable ships and gunpowder and came over to Europe or Africa, they would have done the same raping and pillaging too. Evolution is quite brutal and unforgiving.

It sounds like he is going through things and confused about what he wants (or just doesn't want what you do). In either case it seems like you are a casualty of all this and what would be best for you is to cut him off and find someone more in line with you

One of my ex-girlfriend's was a feminist advocate and worked at a woman's shelter for sexually assaulted/abused individuals. She had a pretty direct and simple way of how to view consent, the top thing to look for is enthusiasm. Within verbal communication and non-verbal body language, as well as in yourself, not just the other person. If either one or both of you aren't enthusiastic about things, then just don't do anything and wait for another time. Also know that consent is an ongoing thing and not a one-time business deal. Make sure to take a small break in between positions and sexual acts to check on the other person, this can be either verbal or by simply giving them a look. Just make sure you get some sort of confirmation and not an ambiguous answer. Following these two straight forward ideas eliminates nearly all the issues we run into with sexual encounters. Out of all the women I've been with since her that have had a wide range of personalities, I haven't had a single bad experience. I even had a girl thank me once for simply asking "how are you doing?" halfway through. She said no guy she's been with has verbally asked that during sex, her lady parts were sore (obviously from my big dick) and wanted me to finish on her but she said she has a hard time asserting herself and wouldn't have said anything if I didn't open up that space for her by asking that one question. Sex is about being vulnerable and opening yourself up to another person, yet ironically we are still closed off in a lot of ways even while it's happening.

The reality of nature is messy, chaotic, and cruel. Life emerges from complex processes, then billions of years go by of a constant survival struggle between different kinds of tubes with mouths, consuming other tubes with mouths without apologizing for it. Now we are here. From this bloody pile of competition humans emerged, perhaps with some luck. Our intelligence being an entire ballpark above everything else, we've come to dominate and used that intelligence to do a bunch of different things to ourselves and the planet (for better or worse). However there appears to be a trend to me. As we collectively become more conscious and aware, we tend to move AWAY from the baseline natural order of reality. We use science to try to understand and test the boundaries of physical laws, even if it's not that useful sometimes, just to see if we can. We were killing each other constantly over survival matters for tens of thousands of years, now we've slowed down quite a bit and are trying really hard NOT to do that. We are also working towards changing our systems and the ways we organize ourselves to do less and less harm to the planet, the animals on it, and live in a better equilibrium where we aren't participating in the bloody and raw battle that every other living thing has to endure to exist. Of course one could argue that this is ALL nature when you look at the big picture, but that's not what I'm concerned about. What I want to know is what are the underlying subconscious motives, urges, and intuitions that seem to be baked into consciousness and awareness that are compelling it to move one way and not the other. Why does intelligence/consciousness/awareness seem to DISTANCE itself from the initial game being played? My understanding so far is that it's shedding selfishness/form in search of the expansion/love?

I see what you're saying, but I think if we take an honest look at history it's pretty clear neo-liberalism won the struggle of the 20th century. Most countries economically and even culturally in some ways are trying to imitate the American model. I agree whether or not the remaining underdeveloped countries should be expected to follow that model as it stands is a good debate to have. It's fair to wonder whether or not it's the best system, as we should always question everything. But whether people like it or not or pretend it doesn't exist in order to resist it is probably irrelevant, since it has become the dominate force and the foundation for most of humanity in our current era. In other words we can't go back, we can only build new things on top of it.

I'm sure Russia will eventually be more in line with the West, but it will be many decades. This war it will set that back probably even 30+ years from now when Putin and his regimes vice on the country is long gone and there is plenty of opportunity to reintegrate back into the global economy. Regular Russians will eventually get tired and force a new direction for their nation for better or worse, it's not like they haven't done it before..... Despite it's gargantuan size, they are clearly more identified with Europe than Asia, and will likely be compelled to be aligned with geopolitically and married economically to a Federated Europe in some way, to protect themselves from the inevitable rise and confrontation with China. It's hard to predict the future though.