PenguinPablo

power hungry, sociopath, liar.

it becomes self-evident as your spiritual journey unfolds. increasingly so...

To take on the human and operate within its domain assumes a certain level of ignorance and craving.

ehh I feel your sentiments towards sexuality are too black and white. there's also elements of toxic masculinity. I'm surprised you haven't explored this facet of your humanity very much. not necessarily in the sense of experimenting with same sex but simply your views on this are very binary. "Bro you don't like pussy? GAYYYY!!!!"

@puporing seems I still have some work to do before I can see that clearly

Granted I have been struggling with depression for a while... It does feel like my awakening, has continued to get deeper at the same time. I want to live a beautiful life but the weight of responsibilities, student loans for a college degree I don't use, as well as a lot more debt. Honestly, I feel pretty overwhelmed by all of this. I am currently doing a coding bootcamp so I can go into web development in 6 months or so. I wouldn't say it's my life purpose but it's pretty engaging for my personality. I enjoy it a lot. I get pretty engrossed in it for days at a time, especially if it's a new project. I have a sales job but struggle because of social anxiety but the potential is massive... But my avoidance tendencies cause me to waste a lot of time and essentially produce ZERO $$$. When I'm ON, I do well, but that's a big IF. I guess I'm just venting but yeah it's also hard to stay motivated when you see how arbitrary and empty everything is, yet I literally can't stop even if it's a dream because there's certain rules within the game.

Yes, I think I'm just a bit overwhelmed at it all temporarily. Really there is no other choice. Lot's of truth here. Gonna have to put my ego aside for a bit I think and get some low level jobs temporarily.

Crime and Punishment 1984

Validating and cherishing my existence... through a simple but heartfelt hug. when you're all alone in the world FOR YEARS, a simple hug is therapeutic

Yeah he’s legit. Bottom line, like Leo said, the best teacher will be through experience.

@Carl-Richard for me it's like I lose my sexual appetite after not fapping for a while. The hangover depends more strongly on the intensity of the orgasm, which are normally weaker if my craving is weakened.

@Ninja_pig kinda sorta not really. consider that the stage that is all about material success is stage orange which is basically "me focused". It's about your own personal success. It can be win-lose, win-win, depending on the set-up of your strategy / approach but bottom line is "me" wins. But what about green where the point is altruism, or even turquoise where it's about awakening, unlikely you'll get rich when your focus isn't that. Unless you're Eckhart Tolle and even then Im sure he was surrounded by a lot of business savvy types that contributed to his success with Power of Now.

Fundamentally because the desire and the drive to bring it to fruition won't be there. Do you realize the level of mental craziness it would take to be Elon or Bezos?? Otherwise, I would say that it is materialistic lust justifying itself through awakening.

TheOdinProject is AWESOME! It's a free coding bootcamp site that gives a really good foundation and conceptual understanding + includes a lot of coding projects along the way with what you're learning. You can pick two paths Javascript or Ruby on Rails. I'm going for Javascript since it seems to be much more relevant and in higher demand nowadays.

Women date up... or choose partners that they perceive to be of the same or greater value than them. Men don't emphasize value very much, and prioritize a woman's beauty over every other intrinsic quality.

winner!

Parasite Memories of Murder

I'll try anything once. except heroin I think it's important to work on yourself too. I don't think any less of a person for getting with hookers. But I've seen dudes psyche get eaten alive with inferiority because all they do is visit asian massage parlors. Nothing wrong with doing it but I would say to work on your relationships with regular gals too

I would move to a cheaper country in Latin America, Europe, or Asia and then start working on it. That's my plan once I pay off all my debt here in America... Get some online gigs, learn to program...

@johnlocke18 Tbf there's a difference between someone that is working on themselves and someone that doesn't take responsibility for themselves and has no interest in growing. I would consider dating someone largely healed from BPD or actively working on understanding themselves. But if the relationship proved itself to be too toxic and my partner decided not to reflect or take any responsibility for their behavior then I would not put up with it. At the end of the day, for me it's not about the label but the person's behavior.

@johnlocke18 It's one thing to make a video about the topic, and another thing to go into OPs thread and disparage her directly (especially when she's coming from a place of trying to better herself). I'm rooting for you India! Generally, it would not be a good idea to date someone with personality disorders. At the end of the day though, that doesn't make you a monster or whatever all the witch hunters are make it out to be. BPD means you have certain symptoms. If you take care of those symptoms by getting therapy, gaining wisdom, then you would no longer qualify for the diagnosis. The problem is the symptoms. Because they're maladaptive. Richard Grannon the life coach on YouTube was BPD. Lmk if you have any questions. I know a lot about this disorder since I grew up with BPD mom and narcissistic dad. Probably something similar happened to you. So don't demonize yourself. I'm proud of who you are. You're a very strong person.

Nah bro. Stop being weird. It’s just you, here.

@Leo Gura one of the best advice I’ve seen on social dynamics. beyond the standard advice… go out and do this and so on

What do you do at that point… they say the seeking energy stops when your reach enlightenment. stop spiritual seeking… stop intellectual seeking… stop pleasure seeking… stop money seeking… and so on on… it’s happened to me a little bit and it felt good. Peaceful. But kinda happy with playing the game too. Being a character, optimizing his resources and life within the rpg. I guess it’s still possible to do so without the same neurotic compulsion that accompanied my behavior previously. Even if it’s just a play or a game. Not saying I’m there yet but ya know.

bro u need to get laid