Angelo, you have what I think is a sensitive soul, in that you feel for others. In direct answer to your question, I also sometimes feel this way. It has been a journey. Somehow I started listening to the Peace Revolution and actually learning how to think critically. Then I started digging and triangulating and trying to understand the Syrian conflict - this was a big eye opener for me. I started telling everyone I could what was actually happening there - countering the narrative of Aleppo etc - mostly my friends turned away from me ... one friend of over 30 years, my best friend, did not talk to me for over a year. For a whole year I had what I felt was 'despair', not depression, but despair. Then I figured I had to take concrete action instead of talking. I sought out Syrian refugees in my home city and funded a magazine where they could share their culture. I figured just doing one thing at a time would help. The thing is in this global age we can literally take on the weight of the world, but we actually still only have the agency of one person - we can try and amplify as much as we can, but I guess we have limits. I have started writing articles, I've written three,. and sent them to a few of my friends to edit - they studiously stay away from the subject matter therein. But at least it gets it off my chest.
I'm currently on holiday in Rome - taking in the history - and realizing we are no more advanced than people and empires before, and that nothing really ever changes. I try and be a good mother, and a good wife, a good friend, sister, daughter etc. Sometimes I feel like SCREAMING everyone is so blind to what is going on and quite frankly wilfully ignorant. People make these choices. I have a tuned in friend, who believes that there is an 'awakening' - she is a positive influence I need, but on the other hand I don't really believe her.
Don't know if this is really helping - just wanted you to know that you are not alone.
