aurum

This is the whole crux of the problem with this conversation. We’re in deep non-dual territory, where language easily starts to break down and become non-sensical. Because of course language is dualistic. But we can take a crack at it. Let’s say you and I are both looking at a table. But I claim the table is imaginary. What does that mean? Well, from a conventional perspective, not much. The table is physical. It has defined properties and constraints. I can touch it, smell, weigh it. I can hold a memory of it. I can cut it in half. I can even give it to my brother for his birthday. All that is possible. In fact, it’s precisely because it’s “so real” that we forget that the table itself is imaginary. That physicality itself is mind. And why would you do that? Why would you create such a persistent illusion that you forget the table is imaginary? Because you wanted to experience remembering. By remembering, you come to know yourself. And you cannot remember if you don’t forget. So that’s what this spiritual work is. God is choosing to remember that it’s God now. God is choosing to remember that it imagined everything into existence by BEING IT. Including physical space, time, all limitations, all scientific laws, birth, death, the earth, this forum, your cat, everything. So God doesn’t just imagine. God IS what it imagines. The table is God, and the table is imaginary. And all of it is You.

No, because I’m imagining that I can’t. You’re also assuming that You/God is interested in transcending its imagined limits. You/God have no such desire. There is deep wisdom is the limitations, that’s why You/God imagine them.

I actually can’t fly because I’m imagining I actually can’t fly. You can fully experience imagination as if it was fully real. It’s just not. That’s what makes it an illusion. Albeit a highly convincing. A master illusion.

If you’re insecure/worried about what she is masturbating to, can you really expect her not to be? Agreed, “gotcha” games would not be a good idea. But assuming this partner was mature enough, this sounds like it was an opportunity to even further explore your sexuality with each other. Really get to know each others kinks. What does she get off to that maybe she doesn’t want anyone else to know about? Or maybe even discover some new fantasies. The key would be to approach it with radical safety and non-judgmentalism. Which is not easy. The temptation would be to want to say what you think the other person wants to hear. It’s possible that enough maturity was not present in that relationship, but you might be able to do it in the future.

Limitations are also imaginary. But necessary. You’re already creating a universe right now.

@Roy did you ask her what she masturbated to?

@Spooney Spoonerson I'm doubled vaxxed. Hasn't given me any problems I'm aware of. In fact, I got the omicron variant a couple months ago and I'm pretty sure the vaccine helped. My case was mild, only had symptoms for a couple of days. You could argue "well what about long term risks?". That is a gamble. All health decisions have a degree of uncertainly, but IMO the vaccine is pretty low risk long term and may help your immune system be better prepared. So honestly, I'd say just get the vaccine if it's really that big of a roadblock to your dream career. But it is ultimately your choice.

Jim Rutt talks about it a bit: Skip to 27:52. It’s an interesting idea, but all good ideas can be corrupted by lower consciousness individuals. Which then creates the conditions for more lower consciousness behavior, thus solidifying the loop. How to break the loop? That’s the million dollar question. Really it’s the same question as how does an individual change? How does someone go from a self-reinforcing negative spiral to a positive one? In my experience, it comes from a deeper place than the conscious mind. The conscious mind believes it to be in control, only to later recognize its own folly. Likely we will move through a similar collective phase. When we do, perhaps an idea like liquid democracy will make rounds. Or not. Doing the “right thing” becomes less important at that point.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned about Leo, it’s that he’s a counterpuncher. If we start arguing left, he argues right. If we starting arguing right, he argues left. Since there tends to be a lot of no-fap positioning on here, I’m not surprised he usually throws out the opposite stance. I suppose there’s a meta teaching here about not being attached to any particular belief. Or maybe he just really likes porn

What exactly do you feel you missed out on? And why can’t you do it now?

@Johnny Galt Reminds me of Charles Eisenstein’s work. I certainly resonate with the idea that we’re in a global shift. What exactly that shift looks like and how it plays out, I don’t know. I’ve only had glimpses of foreshadowing. My temptation is therefore to jump to looking for solutions and answers. I need to “figure it out”. And yet, I feel my deeper longing is actually to relax into not-knowing. Which implies a deep trust and surrendering. Jumping to answers is often a coping mechanism. We need to feel in control and that we have some agency over these problems. “Solutions” can temporarily alleviate that pain and make it seem like things are getting better. But the trap is that by jumping to solutions, our solutions often become shoddy and half-baked. We are moving into territory where not only do we need “new solutions”, we actually need entirely new meta-paradigms for problem-solving. Solutions generated from these old paradigms will ultimately fail to bring about that change we feel the world could be. Thus, even “changing the world” needs to be surrendered. Everything is as it should be. That is the real revolution.

The point of any creative activity is that you are getting to express your Godliness. You are touching who you are at a deep level. Such an act is intrinsically satisfying. You get in the flow. You feel deeply moved, connected, whole and at peace. Of course, art can provide more traditionally tangible value as well. You can use art to pay your bills or to make some sort of political statement. But that is not the primary reason humans are interested in art. It goes way deeper than that.

@sleep That’s partially a product of your age group. Most young people are not ready for such a deep commitment. They barely know who they are or what they want out of life. The fact we are moving through SD stage Orange also means that people highly value their individual autonomy over getting in a relationship. That will shift more as we move into Green. Also, we need to recognize that the quality of a relationship is not necessarily determined by time. The universe has no problem setting you up with partners that won’t last long if they are conducive to the lessons you are seeking to learn.

@something_else Really common dilemma for guys getting into this. Sounds to me like what you want is to continue playing the field a while, beef up your social skills, get some fun single experiences under your belt, and then settle down with a girl you really like. If that is what you want, you may have to let this girl go. It will hurt, but you two want different things. You can’t do everything at once. Possibly. But also, don’t think getting into a relationship is suddenly going to put things on easy mode for you. Long term relationships have plenty of their own challenges. And you still will have opportunities to work on your social skills, just in a different way. I wouldn’t do it if you feel like you can’t commit to it. But there’s also no guarantee that even if you get in this relationship that it will last forever. People break up all the time. Some relationships are meant to be short. Bottom line: do some soul searching and figure out what is most important to you. What is your highest priority?

The thing that will increase your pickup results the most is doing pickup. Yes, working on your general self-esteem may help. But it also may not. It’s not a guarantee that truly high self-esteem will turn you into an ultimate pickup machine. That is a lie PUA teachers sell. Many of the guys I know who are the best at pickup are pretty damaged. Pickup becomes a way for them to fill that void. If you actually healed that wound, you may lose interest in pickup. On the other hand, you have to have some level of self-efficacy and non-resistance to succeed in pickup. So working on your “inner game” might help there. And sorting out the other areas in your life may bleed into you having an easier time with pickup. It really depends on the guy and why you’re doing pickup in the first place. What do you want to get out of this?

Lol these all sound so cringy to me. For me, the simpler an opener is, the better. I don’t want to have to think about it at all. Even just a “hey!” Or “hey, who are you?” is good enough in a loud night club. I’ve probably used those two “lines” more than anything else combined. Alternatively, don’t even say anything. You can just give a high five, do Hand of God, point, or some other non-threatening physical move. Speed in pickup is king. You generally have 1-3 seconds often to approach a girl if you want it to go well. Anything longer than that tends to come off as contrived and “off”. And it is “off”, because you’re hesitating and falling out of flow. Stay in flow. Just say something. Of course, if you can spontaneously come up with a clever or elaborate opener, great. Go ahead and use it. But for me, thinking about that just puts me in my head. I’d rather jump out the plane first and then worry about pulling the parachute. These aren’t bad questions, but I’d save them for later in the conversation. It’s way too much for an opener. An opener is just meant to break the ice, not create a deep connection per say.

@Spence94 Depends on how you define “dream girl/boy”. It’s good to have a strong vision for your ideal partner. But the universe is interested in guiding you to becoming your most actualized version. That means you’ll go through learning specific lessons at specific times. To facilitate this, the universe will often bring people into your life to specifically trigger your shadow and cause you to release resistance. From the universal perspective, this person is “perfect” because they are exactly what you need to evolve and heal. Given that we all have some shadow work to do, this is unavoidable. You will not find a partner who doesn’t trigger you in some way. At the same time, even with these shadow partners you may also find deep intimacy, excitement, compatibility, etc. So it’s not an either or situation. In my experience, it’s more a matter of degree. I’m personally feel I have yet to meet my “highest” partner. But I also don’t expect myself or them to be conventionally perfect. I expect that we will do the work together. It’s ultimately by surrendering our ego’s definition of “perfect” that a partner becomes that to us. This tends to be the opposite approach to modern life. Modern life wants the external world to be perfect, and so we continually scramble to make it so, usually failing. We think that having options are better than commitment because options leave open the door for “something better”. And while there’s nothing wrong with a few options, we tend to get lost in the constant seeking.

@Superfluo Muscles that don’t get used atrophy, that’s just how it goes. I don’t see anyway around that. Best solution would be to incorporate more vigorous activity into your day to day life. Walk or bike instead of drive. Take the stairs. Get a job that requires physical labor. Get a standing desk. Put a pullup bar in your kitchen. Etc etc. Outside of that, you might be able to maintain on one full body workout in the gym each week. I would not expect to make gains though.

Not for that reason. Any major city will have lots of guys doing game. I'd doubt it be any different even if you moved.

@cle103 It happens. I've approached the same girl multiple times without knowing it. So yeah, you're gonna cross trails with other guys. As long as your approaches are socially calibrated, you usually won't have any real problems.

Lol no. It’s extremely rare that a girl will give you a serious ioi before you approach her. It doesn’t work like the movies, where she seductively bats her eyes at you from across the bar and then you slide in. In reality, it’s more like you just insert yourself into her world. No invitation, no permission. Of course if she doesn’t like your approach, then of course you back off. Consent, consent, consent. But don’t be sitting around waiting for her to flip her hair at you before you talk to her. You will go home likely have done zero approaches. Well yeah, if you stare and her and then she keeps looking at you, that’s probably a good sign. But I would never rely on that. Awesome, keep it up ?.

@aklacor727 it might help, but if that timing works best for your schedule I wouldn’t sweat it. Something like that I would only worry about if you were a pro bodybuilder or athlete. If you’re just looking to put on a little bit of muscle and stay healthy, you’ll be fine.

Thanks for sharing. Definitely a good, succinct guideline on reducing myopia. The only critique I’d make is that I do find some of the eye exercises useful. And that’s because the exercises are really just a way to rest your eyes. You could theoretically not do them, but for someone like me with high myopia, I find they work really well. That’s the thing with the natural vision world. Because it plays outside the mainstream medical world, it has all the potential upside and downside of non mainstream information. Upside is that it’s not beholden to the system. People can take more risks. It’s more rogue, like gorilla warfare. The downside is that it tends to lack organization, consensus and standardization. That may change in the next 50-100 years if this stuff starts becoming more popular. But right now its very trial and error, do-it-yourself.

And then what? Are you going to just sit in your apartment, ordering from Amazon and being healed? No, you will then have to go out and still be vulnerable with the people in your life. You will still have to learn how to have relationships. And those relationships will trigger you and be a catalyst for healing. Fundamentally there is no healing “alone”. That you could even do such a thing implies a level of separation that does not exist. Of course, there’s value to more traditional solo work. I don’t dismiss it. But there’s a lot of healthy values at stage green around vulnerability and relationships that should be integrated. Stage green is such an easy punching bag stage. It seems so silly and unpractical. But it’s critical right now, as we transition out of Orange, that people integrate it.

Pittsburgh - just no. Philly - possibly decent. Austin - still not Vegas but definitely a good city for game. This would easily be my top choice of the three. There's also a large spiritual community in Austin.