aurum

@StarStruck It's hard to say based just on the little that you shared. One potential is that you're pushing for the number and so it's just easier for girls to avoid conflict and give it to you than not. But they're not ultimately that invested or that serious about seeing you. You might do better pulling back and qualifying more before setting any sort of date up. You also have to realize that cold approach in general is always going to be inherently flakey. These girls don't know you and they don't know anyone you know. You're not part of their social circle. So there's essentially zero social repercussions for them flaking on you, versus if you were part of the same social circle. And in general, it's just difficult to get anyone that invested in anything in a short interaction that lasts a few minutes. You're literally going from a complete stranger to someone she might want to spend a few hours with on a date. It can be done, but I've found it's just not ideal. This is why I think cold approach should be a last resort when it comes to dating. If you've got no other options, fine. Do a cold approach. But it's not what you should be consistently relying on for your dating life in my option. Dating should come from your social circle. It just makes everything easier. Of course, if you don't have a social circle, you may have to cold approach to make that happen. But cold approach will always be extremely limited.

@HERO_ One gallon of water a day seems excessive and not healthy to me. I’d substitute that for something else, maybe a daily meditation practice. Otherwise I’d say go for it.

@marinaaniram What were you eating prior to fruitarian?

@Lyubov Controversial non-doctor perspective: I’d be more concerned with high estrogen than cholesterol. High LDL is not inherently “bad” without more context. LDL is quite important actually. I would definitely cut the sweet drinks and junk food though. That’s a recipe for potentially developing a degree of insulin resistance, in which case high LDL could then become a real problem.

It’s a very male orientated way of looking at sex. Very results orientated. “Okay babe, we’re not leaving here until you cum five times! Get ready!” And there’s nothing wrong with being results orientated per say. I understand why Leo would say that, especially when you consider just how low the bar is for good sex in our society. And it’s cool to have all that sex knowledge. But in your case, I think you’ll have a better experience if you just relax into it and focus on being present / intimate with your girlfriend.

@integral Don't get obsessed with chasing orgasms. It becomes easy to feel like you're not "doing enough" and that you've got to put on this whole show. If orgasms happen, great. But orgasms are not the goal of sex. I would put your focus on the experience itself.

I think it does. A lot of time there is big potential in traditionally "low consciousness" fields for an LP. You can be the one to help raise the consciousness of that field. It's going to be tricky though. You're going to have to be creative. And you're likely going to have to face a lot of pushback from the status quo and people who don't like what you're doing. The system may try to squash you.

@soos_mite_ah I've definitely been there. I think what you're experiencing is very normal. We all have a desire to belong and feel a part of "the group". I don't think having a perspective that largely goes against our peers is inherently always necessary or "better" than having a perspective that fits in. In fact, in a more ideal world, the things we talk about on this forum would be the norm. And we would just be one of many. The problem is, what happens when the group is collectively walking off a cliff? Do you just follow along, or do you actually declare that you're going to do something different? That's how I see spirituality right now. It seems to me that the majority of people are walking off a cliff when it comes to their life. And spirituality feels like sanity. The more I do this work, the less bothered I am about not necessarily fitting in. I know it's making me a happier, more fulfilled person.

@7thLetter I certainly wouldn't say it looks pretty. There are many problems that I've talked about at lengths on this forum about the way we think about economics. The monetary system and the ideology of economic growth seem to be the biggest culprits.' That said, you've got to watch out for these "doomday" type of predictions. Financial "gurus" make these kind of predictions all the time and the vast majority never amount to anything. Don't let your amygdala run the show.

@Lyubov It's very possible that humans were made to eat animals and that an animal diet is optimal for human health. The research on the carnivore diet is interesting to say the least. In which case there is no getting rid of killing animals to eat. And I don't think there needs to be. That said, if we are to eat animals, it should be done as consciously as possible. Factory farming is horrific and I would not recommend anyone eat animals that are part of that system.

@Joyful Silence Meet Mindful: https://www.meetmindful.com/ Lua: https://www.lua.earth/

No. What you need is conceptual knowledge that is appropriate given your personal experience. Conceptual knowledge beyond that becomes mental masturbation and can actually hurt your results. You have too many theories and maps with no grounding in what they actually mean, which then leads to excess confusion. Don’t assume that more theory = more understanding. Understanding comes from doing, from which the theory can only then help explain your experiences and help you make sense of them in a positive way. Don’t underestimate how easy of a trap this is to fall into. Lots of guys do, because learning theory while watching YouTube is a lot easier than doing approaches and having to work to make sense of your experiences. Of course, there is also the trap of not doing any conceptual learning. In which case you might have a lot of experience, but very flawed ways of interpreting it. A blind intuitive feel that could be heavily biased from your cultural programming. But for guys studying social dynamics, it’s almost always the first trap. Studying is what they’re comfortable with. Actually going out is much harder. If I had to pick between the two, I’d much rather be the guy with tons of personal experience than the guy with all the conceptual knowledge.

@Karmadhi I'd say you're generally correct. Your value as a guy tends to be way more dynamic than static like it is for women. At the same time, there is quite a bit women can do. Even if we just take the most superficial level, a lot of women could vastly improve how guys perceived them if they exercised regularly and ate right. I understand that's shallow and objectifying, but it would work. And considering I hold myself to that same standard, I don't find it unreasonable. These are things everyone should be doing, even just for their own health. Then add in some self-actualization / life purpose / spiritual work and she would be total wifey material, especially for a guy who is less superficial and more developed. And all of this is within your control to do. So there is still quite a bit of leverage, even for women.

Go and test. Whatever idea you have in your mind of what you think will work with girls, just go do it. That will give you a better answer than anything we can tell you. You’ve got to see yourself as a human guinea pig when it comes to this kind of stuff. Try acting like James Bond. Then try acting like Russel Brand. Then try like your favorite PUA instructor. Just try everything. Your subsconscious will figure it out as long as you’re learning your lessons each time you go out.

Why do you care? Introspect on that belief. Why is it bad if a girl you picked up sees you with another girl you picked up? Don’t go for the right answer, look for the answer that feels true for you. Maybe it’s that if they see you with another girl, she will think you’re a fuckboy / player and not want to date you. Or maybe you’re afraid to see yourself that way. Dig on that and things will be clearer.

The problem is that then you're no longer on a fast. Coconut water has significant calories + carbs. So yes, it might help when breaking a fast. But you can't say you're still fasting at that point if that is your goal. Also, I think too much coconut water is not good either. It's a diuretic and so I find I can only drink so much of it. Better to just supplement your electrolytes with Snake Juice if you're serious about doing a long term fast. Cole from Snake Diet has also recommended drinking urine while fasting. His argument is that urine has all the electrolytes you need plus tons of other good stuff that doesn't break your fast. I'll leave that one up to whoever is reading this to decide.

Not doubting you, just curious where you heard that. Also, for what it’s worth, I saw your fasting video and had a very similar experience. Went about 12ish days on water and had to call it off because it got so bad. I didn’t supplement with electrolytes, which in retrospect was likely foolish, but even still I would have likely had to call it off. And I don’t have SIBO or anything autoimmune related. Fasting seems great if you are already overweight or have a serious health condition. But I mostly stay away from long fasts these days. OMAD / intermittent fasting works well with me, plus maybe a 48-72 hour every once in a while.

@WonderSeeker Part of the problem is the way we treat material goods in modern society. Ideally, most things wouldn’t things wouldn’t get thrown away after they are used. They would be more of a circular economy where goods are recycled. Because even if your whole city does not litter, eventually it will end up in a landfill. Which means you are littering. There is no such thing as throwing something “away”.

@TheAlchemist Good question. My thinking is that humanity is on a non-linear growth path at the moment. If you look at statistics around population growth, resource use, technological innovation etc, you’ll see these things have all been expanding exponentially. Spiral dynamics seems to match that exponential curve. Of course, such an exponential curve is unlikely to last. You’re not going to have exponential population growth forever. This is a temporary phenomena, like the “grow spurt” of an adolescence. Thus, if there are stages after turquoise, I’d doubt they will continue to unfold in an exponential way. Although I’m purely speculating.

I get it, not saying it’s easy. Keep going to therapy and taking the next step. I’m simply trying to expose to you where I feel you’re off course. The good news is that they don’t necessarily even have to be close friends. When I say “friends”, I’m including the door guy who you say hello to every time you go to your favorite venue and who knows you by name. Or that random pickup guy you met off a pua forum and now you’re winging each other. Friends can be casual. You just need more social alliances. From there, if you have a small group of close friends who you’re more intimate with, that’s even better.

“One” guy friend??? That’s like saying you’re going into war with a little water pistol. You should have a whole army of friends. No wonder you’re getting demolished. They don’t necessarily have to be into “pickup” in terms of actively studying and being part of the community. They just have to approach. Or be willing to sit there while you approach at the least. I’m telling you, the more cool guy friends you make, the easier this whole thing is. Female friends are good too. They don’t have to do anything but just be attractive and be around you. And if they introduce you to their friends, even better.

So she wants to marry you, but she doesn’t love you? I think the obvious answer here is that this girl is just not that attracted to you. She probably sees you as a very good guy who would be there and support her. Which is nice. But it’s not enough. Possibly you could communicate your desires and rekindle the fire. Couples have done it. But considering she is repulsed by you touching her anywhere sexually, I’d say this one is done. Time to move on.

Krystal from Rising and Kyle from Secular Talk have formed a podcast. Knowing this crowd, I'd figured you'd all appreciate this. Their first guest was Marianne Williamson. I felt she was easily one of the best democratic nominees for president so it was great to see her on the show. And amazing to see that someone who identifies with non-dual teachings did as well as she did during the race. I also love how fierce Marianne is at times in this interview. Goes to show that Love doesn't always have to look like holding hands and cuddling. She's determined to say what she needs to say, even at the risk of personal attack. From a spiral dynamics perspective, it's also interesting to notice Krystal and Kyle's reaction to her. You can see both of them challenging some of their rational stage Orange programming towards the end of the show. It's like watching evolution in motion.

@StarStruck You need friends who also approach. Or at the very least cool with your approaching. Yes, you want to be able to approach solo. But there’s no reason to do that every time. Friends make everything easier.

The Coffeezilla YT channel is one of my new favorite finds. He does a great job exposing what Leo refers to as the "deep problem of marketing" within the self-help world. Essentially, stage Orange and Game A thinking run amuck. Since everyone here is into self-help, I feel it's a good idea for all of us to be aware of how the industry operates and some of its shadows. Don't get scammed by these fools.