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No. I’m not saying you “can’t” get laid a lot, as if it were to bend the laws of physics. I’m saying that guys who are healthy usually don’t have the insecurity that would drive them to do so. You would need to be a neurotic fuck to keep pushing your lay count past a certain point. Especially when it’s just casual and without emotions or attachments. And that number will be subjective depending on the guy. For some, they might still sleep with a lot of women. For others, it might be very few. But there’s an “enough” point that goes off in healthy psyches eventually. Even a guy like Dan Bilzerian, who I mentioned earlier, has hit this wall. He talks about it in interviews. It just took him about 1000+ women to get there. It’s literally everything Leo talks about on his channel. Just do the practices he recommends and you’ll be fine.

I can answer your question, but truthfully this is not how I think about relationships or my life. This is a “there’s a giant fire in my kitchen, how do I put it out???” kind of question. I’m interested in not having fires. The way you do that is by being proactive and way out ahead of something like this happening. It’s like if someone gets a disease after 30 years of horrible diet, lack of exercise, poor sleep. NOW they want a cure. But the cure was not living an unhealthy lifestyle for 30 years. So to your question, if she cheats, the first thing I’m asking is why did she cheat? And why am I in a marriage with a cheater in the first place? Sure, maybe it couldn’t be helped and it’s not your fault. But assuming it hasn’t happen yet, how can I swing things in my favor so that my future relationship is healthy? Maybe learn game. Maybe invest in your financial future. Maybe develop a strong sense of boundaries that weeds out people of low integrity. Maybe learn non-violent communication so you can work these issues out by talking them through before they explode. Once you’ve been proactive and taken responsibility, if you’ve still got a fire on your hands, then we can talk about how to put it out. But my mind in general just doesn’t go there. I don’t think about random potential catastrophic scenarios in the future and how I might mitigate them.

Yeah it’s the truth. There’s this lie sold by pickup teachers that by being “healthy” is how you’ll get laid the most. But you won’t. No guy is going to compete with Dan Bilzerian because of their “self-esteem”. A guy like that has dedicated his whole life to optimizing the most casual sex possible. So why would you want to compete? In fact, if you choose the healthy route, there’s a chance you’ll say “fuck this pickup shit” and just settle down with one girl for the rest of your life. People who are actually secure don’t need to just keep increasing their lay count indefinitely. Have whatever experiences you want, but at some point you should get over it.

@Anon212 Of course, because when you’re just talking to guys and okay-looking girls, you have no agenda. But as soon as a girl is hot, you get an agenda and your mind goes into creep mode. One way you can beat this is by becoming a delusional narcissist who sees themselves as superior to the girl. This actually will work, but I don’t recommend it for obvious reasons. The second way is you can build real confidence, self-esteem and learn to stop seeing women purely as sexual objects for you to conquer. This is actually harder and will likely take far longer. It requires serious personal growth. You likely will even get laid less if you choose this path. But the upside is you will actually be a healthy, happy human being.

That insecurity is going to seriously limit you and have you settling. Every attractive girl I’’ve ever dated had male friends. Even the ones that were more introverted. And they got hit on a lot regardless. That’s the reality of dating attractive people.

Other girls may not share your perspective here. Some girls don’t give a shit, and in fact they may chase a guy even harder if they know he has a girlfriend. It happens sometimes. But you’re not totally off. Often at least one party has some sort of interest. It sounds to me like your boyfriend may just be highly extroverted / social. And you’re going to have to find a way to make it work. I’ve had friends like your boyfriend. Guys who almost compulsively need to make friends and talk to people everywhere they go. It’s like they can’t help it. If your boyfriend is like that, then that’s who he is. A dog is a dog. Even if he could change himself to make you feel better, is that what you really want? I suspect not. The reality is that different personality types have trade offs when it comes to dating. Notice that it’s that same extroversion you love about him when you leave him alone with your family that then leads to this situation. He may have different sides to him, but fundamentally extroversion is not something that can be turned off and on. Just like you can’t just suddenly make yourself extroverted. No one can be all things. So really you only have two options. One, decide that this is just too big of a incompatibility for you. Or two, find a way to work things out where neither of you have to compromise on who you are and what you value the most. This will likely be difficult, but that’s how relationships tend to be.

@Ampresus It’s all good man. Congrats on your first sexual experience. It’s common to be really nervous your first time, I definitely didn’t finish either. You’ll get more comfortable with time, especially if it’s with the same partner. The more you relax and take the pressure off the easier it will be to finish. This isn’t speculation, your sympathetic nervous system is not going to let you sexually perform if it’s too engaged. You gotta be in more of a chilled out, parasympathetic state, which is when your body gets the clue that it’s safe to have sex. Your breath is your nervous system control. When you do slower, light nasal / diaphragmatic breathing, you active that parasympathetic system. When you do quick, heavy, shallow breathing, you active the sympathetic. Use this knowledge do your advantage.

@Raptorsin7 There’s no easy solution to a situation like this because the whole foundation is wrong. The guy I feel is doing the right thing by enforcing his boundary and leaving. And it’s also likely to be tough on the kids. They’re both true. It’s a Lose/Lose situation that he can’t win. Whether he stays or goes, he’s screwed. Really a better way to thinking would be how to avoid ending up in Lose/Lose game dynamics like this in the first place.

@kray Because the west has partially already gone through that phase. Think about the Puritans or Victorian era. The west has always been uptight. It’s only now that the pendulum has swung so that some part of the west is less uptight. Advances in technology and materialism mean that people don’t want or need to engage in strict moralizing about these things. Uptightness becomes obsolete.

@Insightful27 I agree what everyone has been saying. It doesn’t sound like from your story you have any reason to feel guilty, nor do I believe the police will actually get involved. It sounds to me like a miscommunication. It’s important as men that we learn how to read both implicit and explicit consent. But it’s also possible after an experience like this to become paranoid. You’re young and forming opinions about how the world works. So pay attention to the conclusions you might be drawing from this.

For helps avoid plateaus. Keep the muscles guessing. I just don’t think it’s worth the risk. I get that you’re looking for that post-workout insulin release, but maltodextrin is a highly processed sugar and I’d rather not put that in my body. Especially when you consider that other alternatives exist that can give you the same effect: In small doses I’m sure you can take maltodextrin and not die. But I just don’t see its upsides relative to healthier foods.

You don’t have to lower your reps every time. It’s just about what you want to focus on building. Different rep ranges target different things. Olympic lifters and powerlifters tend to go high weight, low rep because they want max strength and don’t care about much else. But a bodybuilder, whose main concern is muscle size and physique, is going to be building in a lot more volume. So think about what your goals are. I personally prefer a more balanced approach, where I vary rep range and weight on a weekly or bi-weekly basis. Again, it all depends on your goals and where you currently are in your fitness journey. For most people, I think full body a couple times a week is probably ideal. Most people only need 48 hours to recover, maybe even 24 hours in some cases. And on your rest days you can do some light cardio if you want, just don’t overdo it. Currently my split looks like this: Monday: HIIT Cardio, Pull day Tuesday: Low Intensity Cardio Wednesday: Off Thursday: HIIT Cardio, Push day Friday: Low Intensity Cardio Saturday: HIIT Cardio, Full body bodyweight exercises Sunday: Off You don’t have to copy that split but might give you some ideas on how you want to structure things.

Looks good. Ideally, I would vary the workouts a little more. Strength is usually built at around 5 or fewer reps, that’s when you’re really tapping that Phosphagen system. And if you really want to build muscle, I’d be hitting that 15 rep mark at times with 30 second rest for max hypertrophy. Also, there’s more to fitness than compound lifts. What about your aerobic exercise, mobility or your endurance? Maybe those aren’t important goals for you, but to me they go hand in hand with being a healthy, fit person. Not someone with just big muscles. Regardless, these are rather nitpicky points I’m making. The most important thing is you have a plan, be consistent with it but also adjust as you learn more over time. Maltodextrin is not good for you. I’d cut that out. I’d incorporate more healthy fat into your diet. Fat is going to be more calorie dense to help you put on size. If you can find grass-fed ghee, that might be a good place to start. You don’t just want to be a carb burner. I’d also consider adding some red meat. That will help you get your protein and fat in. And that’s going get you a lot of essential amino acids (bcaas) for building muscles. You won’t even need to take creatine if you eat enough red meat. Meat has creatine.

You could eat nuts, that’s what I did when I was vegan. Definitely a calorie dense food. But I’d argue meat is going to be way healthier than eating a bunch of nuts everyday for many people.

@Regan I don’t need someone who is outwardly spiritual. That can just be another form of ego. I myself might not even seem like someone who would be into these kind of ideas. What I care about more is emotional maturity, aligned goals / lifestyle, personal chemistry and her willingness to grow. Which could mean she is into spiritual topics, but not necessarily. I dated one girl a couple years ago who didn’t know a thing about meditation or any of this. But she more mature than many of the girls I’ve met. We got along really well.

@Tristan12 if you’re going to eat pasta and bread for calories, why not meat? Meat will be healthier than either of those.

@ValiantSalvatore You’re most likely fine. People may even want to repost. If you have their contact info you could just ask for permission.

@Fadious The bigger thing I see here is that you’re implicitly assuming there’s one “right answer” to what you’re asking. Like a math question. But the reality is that human interaction is way more complex and chaotic than that. Sometimes you should tease. Sometimes you shouldn’t. Sometimes you should double down. Sometimes you shouldn’t. Sometimes what you do goes well. And sometimes it doesn’t. Of course if you’re new to game, then these kind of questions are natural. You’re trying to learn and I’m not really being helpful by just saying “there’s no answer”. When you’re new, you want an answer to grab onto. You want/need clear instructions on what to do. And that can be helpful. But it’s also limiting and not real life. Next time you’re out, see instead if you can “feel” into what the right answer will be in any given situation. You will be wrong sometimes. Contemplate about it afterwards. If you can develop that inner radar, you won’t need to post on forums or ask dating gurus about what to do any longer. Use these tools if you want temporarily, but also keep in the back of your mind that you are going to outgrow them. Make us obsolete. If any dating guru you have is not doing that, you have a false guru.

Do you generally advise people to drink reverse osmosis? And then adjust the diet to ensure proper minerals for hydration? In my personal experience, it’s far, far easier for me to “eat my water” than drink it. But it seems like even this has a limit as my lifestyle is very active right now and so I lose a ton of fluids / electrolytes naturally. So mineral water, sometimes even with some sea salt, seems to do the trick.

@Luna Eating can be a deep pattern for a lot of people. What are you eating typically? And how often?

@tsuki I’m more interested in the minerals that alkaline water has than the PH value. Minerals are important for hydration and really just your overall health. So I think it’s definitely worth drinking for most people, especially if you’re concerned you might be low in essential minerals or suffer from dehydration.

@Carl-Richard Glad to see you included Jordan Hall on there. He doesn’t get the same amount of attention on here as Daniel but he seems just as intellectually brilliant and a good dude overall. I think you could also add Buckminster Fuller to the Game B category, as he was talking Game B before it was called Game B. I think you could also make a category for certain economists as they tend to think systemically. People like Herman Daly, Nicholas Georgescu-Roegen and EF Schumacher inspired a whole generation of ecological and degrowth economists. Irving Fisher, Marx and Keynes of course also come to mind. There’s a ton that could be added to that list.

@Rasheed Why do you want that? What’s the goal? It shouldn’t be a problem as long as you have a big enough meal with calorie dense foods. Some people say it’s hard to eat that much food in one sitting, but if you eat slow enough you can likely do it. I’ve been doing OMAD for several years now and my weight barely fluctuates at all.

@Lyubov Cold showers. Or hell, just go stand outside with your shirt off in that temperature. That’ll wake you right up.

@Nightwise The problem I find with these tests is that once you study SD, you know all the “right” answers. And it becomes easy to distinguish what color the researchers are testing you on due to obvious key words, e.g higher authority, consensus, competition, etc. So really, someone could score Yellow or above easily even if they are not at that stage of the spiral through intellectual agreement vs embodiment. If you really want to know your SD color, look towards your actions and behaviors. That will give you a better clue of what you truly value versus what you think you should value because your ego wants to be “highly developed”.