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Everything posted by aurum
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Do you find it a bit strange that as soon as you run into some emotional trouble and your ego is challenged, suddenly RSD are a bunch crooks and you're "too decent" to do that slimy, disgusting, evil pickup stuff? Because It couldn't be possible to do pickup in a way that doesn't involve taking advantage of overly drunk girls, right?
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aurum replied to aurum's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
I run a business and a blog, both which are relatively new. Neither is making enough money at the moment to pay the bills so I'm hustling pretty hard. I have some savings and a part time job but it's certainly not ideal. I don't always worry about money but I definitely have in the past. For instance, when I went to graduate school I used to stress that I wouldn't have enough money for school. But then I managed to get a position in the department that paid for the whole thing. So that helped -
These things don't contradict each other. If you have the leverage to go out and practice your social skills, good. Do that. You probably only got that leverage by being very aware of the pain being lonely and an introvert has caused you. Most people would deny that.
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aurum replied to aurum's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
-Before the panic attacks, it was usually money or just a general sense of being overwhelmed with things I have to get done. -Yes it feels like at the moment every thing is pointless. Very surreal, it's not a state I find myself in often -Yes I do. Although it can definitely be tough when it's actually happening -Yes. I lived for almost a whole year by myself. I've also done backpacking trips alone -
aurum replied to aurum's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
I definitely don't like the idea of being alone for a long period of time. I want to be at least around people. Both times it happened I felt stressed out first for a while before the actual panic attack happened. But as far as I can tell, the thoughts were very different. Only the emotions seemed the same During the panic attack, I usually feel a sense of fear. My heart rate increases and I get very cold. Start to feel depressed and like everything I'm doing is pointless. Literally feels like my mind is sick. Start to feel normal again usually when I either do some meditation, take and shower and maybe hangout with some friends. Or do some other activity to take my mind off of it. Thanks for asking -
aurum replied to aurum's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
You may be right, it could definitely just be placebo. I've wondered the same thing. At the moment we're unsure of what is causing them. They are a new development for me. He thinks it may have something to do with abandonment issues from my father because they seem to be trigger by me being alone. But it's just a working hypothesis. -
Go to a Meditation Retreat (will be crossed off in August!) Read War and Peace and other literary giants Raise my consciousness as high as possible Threesome Write a best selling book Have a multi million dollar business Have a popular blog Go to Mardi Gras Go to Carnival Go to Burning Man Backpack Europe/Asia Record a music album Get a black belt in some martial arts Become a public speaker Live in a Mansion in Miami Love and help others Do deadliest catch style fishing Be Happy. Be Present
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NoFap is an interesting one for me. I still can't be sure if it's effects are real or placebo but all I know is that when I used to watch porn, I had way more issues in my life. Cut out porn, suddenly many issues seemed to resolve themselves. My advice to you is: 1) Have a larger purpose to why you want to quit. Don't think you can just willpower your way through it. You need a strong REASON which is give you effortless willpower 2) Don't give an inch. You're dealing with a deadly game of rationalizations, and if you gave an inch (I'll just watch this youtube video, it's not porn!) suddenly you're relapsing. 3) Have shit to do. This ties into advice number 1 but have other things to do but sit around on the computer all day. Don't even give yourself the opportunity to relapse. 4) Become conscious of what porn is doing to , I had to see all the fucked up ways it was hurting my life in a very real way in order to get the leverage to stop.
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I really just think of life purpose as doing whatever the fuck you want to do when you strip away all the social conditioning bullshit. Maybe for you that's to build a huge business that puts 5 million in your bank account. I don't know. But whatever it is, just do it.
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You can, you just may have to get more creative with your use of time. What are you willing to give up in order to maintain these habits?
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I don't believe in "The One", I'm only believe in relationships that are good and relationships that suck. It's incredibly difficult to find someone of serious quality but there isn't any other way to do it but meet a bunch of people who aren't quality. There's no short cut here. Play the field and enjoy it as much as possible. Trust that you will find that quality partner eventually when the time is right. You won't even be expecting it.
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It's definitely not a priority for me. But I'd also be lying if I said I didn't have a certain style. Style comes naturally from authentic expression of self.
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Stronger life purpose. Meditation
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aurum replied to DizIzMikey's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
If you've got time to consistently watch TV and play video games you aren't challenging yourself enough. -
Book Name Radical Honesty by Dr. Brad Blanton Rating 9/10 One Line Summary You hate your life because you lie all the time Why it’s Awesome You are a liar. I am a liar. The human species as a whole is one giant cluster fuck of liars. And that’s why people are miserable. Brad Blanton is a fat Texan with a PhD who explains in Radical Honesty that lying is the source of all human stress. This is because we lie to protect our ego, or false mental self-image of ourselves. Yet this maintaining of a self-image causes separation between we actually are in reality and who we are pretending to be. In other words, when you pretend to be someone you’re not, it’s a shitty feeling. There’s no way around this, yet people so desire to maintain these self-images that they will continue lying even at drastic consequences to themselves and others. I’ll give you a practical example. Say your whole life you were a devout Catholic. But one day you begin discovering ideas that maybe the Catholic religion isn’t everything you thought it was. You now have two choices. One, you can renounce your faith. Everyone who once knew you as a devout Catholic will now know you’ve turn your back on your faith. Your family will at best be disappointed, at worst they will disown you. You will likely have to face all your friends since you likely have friends who are religious as well. You will have to tell your spouse that the religion in which you based your marriage and raised your kids you now believe is a sham. Or, you can lie. And I can assure you, most people will take the lie. Either they will lie to themselves by rationalizing why they choose to remain a Catholic or they will lie to everyone around them, telling them they still are a person of devout faith. It’s easy to see why either of these scenarios would cause immense amount of stress. Let’s the person chooses to lie to themselves. In that case, they would forever have to live with the cognitive dissonance and little voice in their head that says “you know this is bullshit” every time they acted on their faith. Or they would be forced to put on an act for people the rest of their life. Assuming you’re not a sociopath, this sounds like the definition of hell. And you’d be right. So maybe you’re saying at this point “well, I don’t do anything like that. I tell the truth all the time. I have no major secrets”. This is where it gets subtle. Maybe you don’t have anything major you’re hiding from the people you love, although I doubt it. But how often do you tell little white lies of omission, conveniently leaving out details? This is a brutal pill to swallow and an even tougher put into practice. As I’ve mentioned before, human beings primary motivating emotion is fear, and most people are simply too afraid to really tell the truth and be completely vulnerable. Blanton goes onto to explain that telling the truth comes in three stages. The first stage he refers to as “revealing the details”. This is when someone comes clean about major lies they’ve been holding from people. The second stage is when people are honestly speaking their mind at all time. Finally, Blanton gives you some practical steps for learning to tell the truth and examples from his client’s therapy sessions (did I mention Blanton is a therapist?). Why Does It Suck Blanton claims that telling the truth is the only way to achieve enlightenment. He certainly wouldn’t be the first person to claim to have found the “true path”. So his claims are probably exaggerated to say the least. Also, this book definitely could have been cut down to its more essentials. Towards the end he is mostly just repeating himself. The Wrap Up This book lives up to its name. It’s a hilarious, brutally honest account of human nature that is bound to make you squirm and feel shitty about yourself. Which is exactly what you need for self-development. I am not above any of this. I still lie all the time. I lie to the girls I fuck by putting on a front that I’m cooler than I actually am. I’m not honest with them about my past, including the fact that I study and practice pickup. I lie to my family by not telling them I resent them and don’t care to speak to them. Instead I just ignore them. I act like I care when I don’t. And finally, I lie to you, my readers. Often I think that my nature writing style and honest opinions won’t be good enough to gain and audience that I want and so I try too hard to make my writing “good”. I lie to you guys by pretending like I have all the answers when I write this reviews. In reality, I’m mostly just making these reviews and opinions up on the spot. The whole, “I’m an authority because I’m an entrepreneur” that I promote myself on this blog is a sham. I own some small time 3d printing business and do some freelance writing. I worry about paying my bills. You don’t have to listen to me. I’m not doing anything anyone else couldn’t. The truth is, I’m a gambling man. Yes, I want fame, recognition, money and women. If it all would just fall in my lap, I’d probably take it and not do a damn thing. Given though that this seems unlikely to happen, I lie to myself and pretend I care about offering value to other people. In reality, I’m mostly just hoping that by offering enough value it will come back to me. And so I gamble. Those are my honest thoughts for the day. Buy this book, read it and stop fucking lying.
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You're missing the point to having a life purpose. Life purpose should be something that gives you energy, not something that is a drain.
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Emotions are always a good guide. Your intuition knows what is right or wrong for you
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Threesomes dude. Find a girl who is down to bring new girls into the bedroom with you. Frame it as a couple activity you will be doing together. The new girl is just a "toy" for you and her. If you can't do that, consider an open relationship. Those can be tough to pull off though without blowing up. You need some serious game.
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There's more important factors to worry about in a relationship than whether the couple are introvert or extroverts. Handle the more essential parts and that other stuff will fall into place.
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As they say in the self-development community "the more personal the wound, the more universal the wound"
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aurum replied to mikeyy's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
Just keep sitting every day and practicing. You can't force it. In fact forcing it will have the exact opposite effect. -
I can relate to this 1000%. Around that same age, I found myself interested in all sorts of different areas of life and I couldn't understand what was wrong with me. I was sure that if I just found that "one thing" then I'd be fine, but unlike everyone else I didn't seem to be able to do that. So advice to you is two fold: 1) You probably do have some interests that are more pronounced than others. Your job is to just keep following your heart and you'll naturally just keep cutting out the bullshit of things you REALLY don't like to do as you get older. 2) This was a life changer for me. Consider the possibility that maybe you aren't meant to have just "one thing" that you enjoy doing and that's it. One of the reasons I love entrepreneurship because it allows me to participate in a full range of different activities from reading, networking, logical modeling, public speaking, writing, sales, negotiating, etc. That's partially what makes a good entrepreneur. So instead of trying to fight it, embrace it because that may be your path as well.
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aurum replied to Empty's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
They are very different. In SDS, you don't allow yourself to move at ALL. In "Do-nothing", you would not resist the temptation to move if you had it. Rather you would just try and be aware of yourself while you are moving. "Do-nothing" therefore is a complete surrendering to whatever it is the mind/body wants to do. The benefits aren't different although I'd say SDS takes more willpower. -
Thank you. Honesty is one of the hardest things I've ever done. Good luck
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The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. Really beautiful story that will inspire you.