Nemo28

People naturally want to grow and expand, it is hard wired in us, no matter the economical situation, but how it is going to look like might not be in accords with your definition of 'mature'. We can grow in infinite ways, directions. And money certainly helps you to get that support.

@Leo Gura I think, generally speaking on average, people born in wealthy families have more chances for self development. Cause it's those early years that are most important that sets you for life, when you're still pretty unconscious and are very dependent on others. If you have sheltered life, you can grow more easily, rapidly, healthy. If you're born in dysfunctional family system, life will stunt your growth and many protection mechanisms will have to develop. And good look unravelling those in your adolescence!

shit, that must be intense! Whatever works for you, just trying to help ^^

When everything has gone to hell, surrender to the Father as Christ did. Would be good idea to hold cross or some holly item near you to ground you to the light side. You could also pray "Our Father".

I wonder what is that thing within that keeps me away from forming relationships, especially romantic ones, involving having a girlfriend. Would that be a distractions from focusing on God or the fact that i am searching for something authentic and can not find it outside, thus i choose to stay alone in contemplation. And yet, cant live without human connection, many times i have prayed to God for death (forgetting), but here i am, that thing that can't die. Maybe if I become authentic enough I would feel that the connections that i am creating with others are authentic too, and then i would not be so alone. True connections, i guess is what i desire, and for that the soul has to be purified by loneliness.

Indeed. Tried to find happiness by disconnecting with every human being, didn't work. Suffering deep despair, as last resort went to church and cried, talked with the priest and it helped me to feel much better, also the church lady is checking one me from time to time, so that seems to be enough to make me feel like i'm part of the group. Humans need other humans, to survive.

The truth is men don't date women, they don't even talk to them, sex is a sin and the only way to stay true to yourself is to live in celibacy. Forget about women and take care of cats (if you have any).

When you're really aware its hard to bullshit yourself..

Why would you want to perform the miracles then? Just to prove to yourself that its possible?

But when you are in the DMT lvls you dont care about any achievments or miracles, only ego cares. If ego could create miracles this reality would be less than perfect, its because you cant do miracles is why this reality is so amazing and you want to return to it when tripping, otherwise it can turn to hell. Being able to perform miracles would be too much and not in alignment with beauty. But i can imagine if you grow yourself to such a lvl where nothing really matters to you be hell or heaven then maybe it wouldnt be so problematic.

Nice!

just trust Life and do the best thing at the moment whatever that is to you

All i can do is laugh

Thank you, this was useful! <3

I like the dolphins ^^

Well solipsism is a concept but your true self escapes all concepts thus we can never come to definite conclusion of who is the real "ME". The real "ME" is always a subject, it only sees, is aware and not thinking. Ofc when its starts to think it gets into confusion and this discussion starts. I can not get a satisfying answer to this problem ever..

Okay..here i''ll be recalling and reflecting my memories from the most eraliest i can remember. I really hate to writte stuff, but I want to do this so that i can understand and see my life pattern. It might be a bit chaotic since im not very orderly type of person lol My first memory was when i was small child (idk exactly the age, could be 4 years). Interestingly when i remember myself at that time, i was just as conscious as i am now. I guess in terms of awareness nothing has changed. So i was with my mother, she was taking me for a walk or something i think we were supposed to go by bus somewhere. Anyway i remember i was very thirsty so i asked my mother for something to drink, she had a small bottle of water but there wasnt enough water to satisfy my thirst. I asked for more water, i remember i experienced so much thirst i couldnt tolerate it and started to cry and feel aweful within myself, my mother didnt know what to do, she seemed desperate and angry and told me to be patient, eventually we went to a caffeteria and she bought me an orange juice. So i felt better.

We are already all dead..

Isnt that they both produce the mind dissolving effects which leads to bliss?

Does it have any power to influence the body mind behavioral patterns? Or is it just there to only watch and nothing else? Is there nothing else for me to do than to watch? Does it do anything?

sorry i cant undesrtand :'/ All i know is im a "witnessing"

i dont understand, can you please elaborate

@vibv Seems my effortlessness is being a mess.

@vibv @Nahm After participating in lots of shamanic ceremonies and taking plant medicines i find that there is no end in consciousness expansion, you always come out kinda "wiser" and improved. But i also strongly feel that i want to be self suficient and not depend on these things, but i have fear i might not be as wise as i could be if i stop taking plant medicines.

@Vibroverse @vibv My university says im going to fail the course if i dont put more effort. And yet i know i cant force myself to do "better". Its true im living with less and less effort, but by doing this im failling the course which cost me so much money.