StarStruck

This guy is selling procrastination programs: https://timetheory.com/ His videos are free but the program costs about 2-3k dollars depending on how fat your wallet is. If you are interested, they can call you. After the free consultation, the enrollment is optional, and from what I reached 2-3k dollars is the price. What do you guys think? Is it worth it or do you guys have better options? A lot of people say don't do it: https://www.reddit.com/r/productivity/comments/hfeqzx/anyone_here_use_andrew_kirbys_procrastination/ These are the reasons for not doing it: I'm already in therapy so I'm already getting guidance. The books he is recommending I can just buy. I'm already doing what he is recommending but the problem is that I'm not seeing a change in myself. I have problems with dissociation and escapism in my day to day life.

I’m stuck between these two options. I’m gravitating towards a bachelor in IT consultancy because it is a more social job and less stressful. I think I will be more happy with that. Also I can always get my certificates in programming and exp on the side. I thought myself Java and it was exciting but I did get stressed out that some stuff didn’t work out at once. I think the safe option for me is It consultancy and then doing programming on the side. What do you guys think?

@abrakamowse I knew somebody was going to make that joke @hyruga 2-3k for a program is too much. I'm ok with paying 1k and you pay for the tutoring anyway. All the knowledge is out there in books and the internet. @AlphaAbundance apparently there is a market for it though. He started out solo and now he has a team of 20+ people selling anti-procrastination advice.

I think Elliott also has financial incentives to double down on blue. If he starts preaching stage green, he won't be able to make that money that he is making right now. He is an interesting figure but I never bought into him. He speaks with a pompous fake voice and that always came across as insincere.

Look into lateral thinking if you want out-of-the-box problem-solving. I read it a while back. Soon I will reread it.

Half-breeds always tend to be the most race obsessed for some reason. I can't help it but notice it.

Is there a best way of doing that?

It seems that people who take 5 MeO DMT age much faster. Obviously there hasn't been any research on this topic so this is just speculation. My theory is that it opens up life force going through the body and that makes you age faster. Besides that 5 Meo DMT is just chemical dank. It is bound to have an effect on your biological age.

Definitely option 1 is very taxing on me at the moment. That option actually describes me perfectly. I can see the structure of my personality and it feels like a prison. I was thinking about opening a topic but I didn't know how to tell my story. Currently I'm going to psychotherapy once a week and she doesn't know a lot about enlightenment but she did help me with loosening up. By the way, this made me go into psychotherapy: This event made me realize that my traumas have a great impact on me and that I'm not able to heal myself. I tried to heal myself with meditation and all kind of other practices but with no success.

Yes. I still believe in the self. On a regular base I get flashbacks to my childhood traumas. It is a huge problem in my day to day life. Most of the time I'm in a dissociative state (according to my therapist). I become an observer instead of a participant. This was like 7 years ago. I tried to recreate it but without success. I even took various kinds of psychedelics but I freaked out because of my ego problems such as being a failure in my life.

The ego is generated by the mind. If you stop generating subjective reality, you get to see the truth. I still haven't realized enlightenment by the way. I heavily identify with my traumas and my past but I have seen some glimpses of nonduality.

They say you have to calm the mind, before you can listen to your heart.

@supremeyingyang I will look into antifragile. Thanks for the advice. I rather do something and experience a little stress than do a profession with no stress but also no satisfaction. And I think you are right. I think most programmers totally love their job. They do it to get paid. You really have to be a special person to love programming.

@supremeyingyang To be honest, I already made my choice. Programming is not my thing. I tried it out for months. I thought myself Java and it didn't gave me satisfaction. Especially debugging is a pain in the ass. I'm already a stressful person and I have my own problems so it doesn't seem programming is a fit for me. I want to be a IT consultant. Keeping up with the latest IT news, writing reports, giving advice, leading projects is more my thing. I'm not sure what kind strategic objectives I can set. There aren't any hard skills you need to be an IT consultant: https://www.quora.com/What-are-the-skills-needed-to-work-as-a-Tech-consultant

@Breakingthewall @Michal__ As I said this is my speculation. Buddhist also talk about this so that is a source. From my own experience. I took microdoses of 5 MeO couple of times and I got a lot of grey hairs on the side of my head, in a short period. I must say I didn't reach enlightenment because of internal blocks (youth trauma and ego identification), so I stopped. I'm not a good example but if you look at Leo Gura and compare him to couple of years back he aged very quickly (take notice how Leo's skin and eyelids changed). He says he eats healthy and works out so it can't be that. Natural aging is normal but Leo aged very fast.

@supremeyingyang yes pls

For example the levels of consciousness map by Richard Dawkins is very handy with meditation. How many of you know this map by heart? I'm not a fast learner and my progress with enlightenment is not going as rapidly as I want. I know spirituality is not about memorization. It transcends concepts but I seem stuck.

@Adamq8 yes @Nahm thanks

What if you have nobody? Are you a nobody? This made me think about nondualism. There is only you, and no other.

I saw there was no summary of this video. How To Contemplate Using A Journal Leo has a previous episode to contemplate in your head. This video is about using a journal. It is better so you can lose yourself in monkey mind. Contemplation and self-inquiry are different Self-inquiry is for enlightenment Contemplation is for truth seeking Contemplation is easier than self-inquiry Nothing Leo says is true unless you can rediscover these truths yourself. Contemplating is key: It is step zero with everything in life, you need to make everything your own by finding out yourself. That is the essence of minor- and major truth seeking. Otherwise you make great mistakes You can't be good in life without truth seeking You get result with contemplation: you get real understanding/clarity, you will make leaps You will need to put in the cost. Without doing the spiritual work it will be like an athlete who does research and never works out You will have to do math to understand it for example. Don't be lazy. Assumptions: question the assumptions You are full of bull Nothing your mind says can be trusted All beliefs and teaching are false Only direct exp is true Truth is not fragile: you can't hurt the truth by questioning, you can only make it clear Contemplation is not there things: Speculation and guess work Justifying what you already know It is not building new beliefs Don't build (grand) theories Day dreaming or imagination It is not building Défense for what you believe: to yourself or to others It is not opinionizing It is not pursuit of practical advantage or success: happiness doesn't come from advantage or success Use contemplation for not what it can do for you, but what something is What is contemplation: Observation: deconstructing/breaking down ideas Awareness and going meta: observe observation, and then observe that Self reflection: what is your role in understanding Think independent: question assumption/teaching/culture(knowing the truth at all cost) What does contemplation require? Open mindedness: be open to be shocked Fearlessness: don't run away from fear. Face it! Self-honesty Careful observation Impartiality: step out your role No idea is sacred Self-reliance: nobody is here to help you Genuine curiosity: how is it that you don't know what an object is? Traps: Self-evidence: is for example science self-evident? It is not Cultivating system for contemplation is a trap: work towards the right answer: don't go through the motions/system of thinking Don't depend on books or videos Go outside your culture Grand theory is a trap: don't construct False skepticism: (go for painful stuff instead, feel loneliness, develop a taste for it) Don't bring science to contemplation Distraction is a trap (watch distraction episode on actualized) Technique for contemplation: Get a separate journal for contemplation: Take 20-30 minutes Take a contemplation question: pick 1 question or object (write it down)Start from ground zero, accept you don't know it is to open up room to contemplate, throw your previous culture/knowledge/memories away, don't use external source. Set aside your emotional baggage and prejudices. Don't philosophize/speculate but instead use direct experiences. If you can't figure it out with direct experience, you will never figure it out. Ground yourself: use direct examples, don't use what you learned from books or heard from other people Question the topic: raise a question, begin very basic, bring up a concrete example, Examples for questions: Existential questions: what is meaning, science, ego, concept, belief, truth, evidence, symbol, language, fear, identify, thought, conflict, duality, boundary, reason, culture, judgement, value, object, evil, self-help, apple, happiness Personal psychological questions: How am I full of shit? How am I lying? Which truth do I refuse? How am I corrupt/evil? What do I fear? What do I whine about? How do I play victim? How do I play victim? What conflict of interest do I have? How am I self bias? How do I cling to culture? What is sacred? How hypocrite/weak human being? let your mind observe the question/thought, notice how the thought is arising, Bring up examples (from your life). Ask what is the common denominator? let the question flower into 10 other questions key is not to get to the bottom question: find possible answers instead Purpose of this work is to grow Create traction with reality keep bringing up the original question and go back to it, question prejudices (start with: accept that you don't know) Determine how deep you want to go, keep on the topic though

@PurpleTree i still have to see proof for Syrian jihadists operating in Azerbaijan. Other than that Karabakh was mostly Azeri before Armenia unleashed a policy of ethnic cleansing and genocide in 1992. Only area where Armenians were a majority was around the capital of Karabakh. They will respect Azeri sovereignty and they don't really have a case to do otherwise. If Armenia decides to start another war this time they will lose territory in Armenia proper.

It terms of international law Azerbaijan has a good case. Karabakh is recognized as Azeri land which Armenia occupied 30 years ago. As we speak the area is already liberated and the international community couldn't do much for the poor Armenians. They had no foot to stand on. They should have settled for an agreement with Azerbaijan. Now they lost it completely after a complete humiliation of their army. Too sad.

I tried microdosing 5 MeO DMT to do the same thing and I caused stress and panic. My guess is that my suppressed trauma energy is just too much.

Me too

My mother is very toxic for the whole family. I'm clearly seeing her traumas back in myself and the more I heal myself the more I want to do something about my mother who is ruining my dad's life. She is a childish 50 year old woman. If you saw her on the street you would think she is a mature 50 year old woman but within relationships she acts like a 13 year old brad. She is stuck in the past and always brings old stuff up, although we told her she should let go of the past because it poisons the family. Friends is something she doesn't have. People avoid her because she is very egocentric: always talks about her self and she becomes vindictive very fast. My father's career got ruined because of her. She would always call her to complain about being a house wife and about the kids. She was also very violent and emotionally distant to everybody really. It is all in the past and we can't change the past but I'm seeing that she is just continuing her behaviour (like calling him on his work to complain about being a house wife or starting fights about nothing at home). It really hurts my dad. Divorce is not really an option. My mother can't take care of herself financially. They are going to therapy I believe. It doesn't work. My mother is just stubborn. I tried to talk to her about her past but she doesn't really want to talk about it. At this moment I'm focusing on myself and I have a lot of work to do to fix my own problems. When I'm "fixed" I think I can help them too but considering my situation my healing will take multiple years.