StarStruck

only a naive person

One of the best things I have done recently is not listen to women. Yes, listen to them, but don't take them serious. You just have to deliver what they really want deep down.

In dreams I'm afraid to die because I don't want other's to be sad. This cleared up a lot for me.

What worked for me: decoupling words and meaning Wow. This just skyrocketed my understanding of things. It wasn't contemplation what I was doing. I was thinking in images and in analogy. Once I saw the difference everything started recontextionalizing and I was in a new paradigm without procrastination. I hope this helps some people.

@nexusoflife You need the insights before you can find nice words to explain it of course. I think you have both talents. You are able to see the insight and also pick the right words to describe it.

How did you develop it?

The most difficult part is unlearned your current wrong notions about self discipline, habits, willpower and so on. If productivity is not working out. There is nothing wrong with the universe. The wrong is in your understanding. To do this learn from others. Dive into their psyche. Read books. Talk to people. Don't contemplate by using words!!! That is bullshit and it drove me further into ignorance. Contemplating with words while being ignorant is being in a loop of ignorance in my personal experience until now. Thinking in analogy helped me. Also don't think this is a magic fix. There multiple layers of understanding with analogical thinking. Systematic approach helped me.

The alchemist. I don't read many fiction books.

If it is a true expression of you then yes. That is why I think spirituality and shit if useless and should be avoided until you can express yourself in your life. At least for me spirituality didn't do much good until I could express myself in my life. In my case education was a great expression.

I'm not in the position to buy a house anyway, but if I was in that position I would wait for that 20-30% market correction. Also not all real estate markets are not the same. In west Europe, mortgage system is going to bust, and after the reset, people won't be able to get the same loans anymore, pushing the market prices to decline. That is true. I don't know much about stocks tbh.

Those will be heavily devaluated during a market crash. Especially real estate here in Europe: it is heavily overpriced and artificially kept high by the banking system. Even they admit the situation is not sustainable on the long term.

I have crypto just because there is no better option. I don't want all of my money in fiat currency. It is either fuck or get fucked. Sometimes there is no in between.

Your language skills are extraordinary.ce.

Social skills guidebook is all you need.

In most porn, girls are being face fucked or perform oral sex. Thanks but no thanks.

Definition: principles A fundamental truth or proposition that serves as the foundation for a system of belief or behaviour or for a chain of reasoning. Definition: habits A settled or regular tendency or practice, especially one that is hard to give up. Are principles and habits just the same thing but it is just in different circumstances? I feel like "habit" is a broader term and "principle" is a narrower term... I could be wrong but when we say habit it feels like closer to the basic human: everybody has habits good or bad....while the term principles is used for more developed humans: not everybody has principles.

Applying system's thinking to stuff you have problems with. You first need massive self-awareness first because you are projecting shit onto things.

Like, partly in blue, partly in yellow? I know that subsequent stages overflow but how does that work if a person is blue-yellow? I think if you want to reach yellow you first need to pass through orange and green so the person must also have some traces of those stages?

That is what I'm doing (psychotherapy) but I think it is a good game plan to know where I'm at and what to aim at. I need to aim at stage blue values. Last year I was in denial about my stage red beliefs/pathologies and that made me stuck for a while. Since my realization of what I said above, psycho-therapy and self-actualization is going well. Unfortunately my therapist doesn't know about spiral dynamics but I don't think she needs to know it to help me with trauma healing and coaching on self-actualization.

Transferred some replies from this thread: https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/22318-spiral-dynamics-stage-blue-examples-mega-thread/?page=60#comment-810903 Thanks, that cleared up a lot about my parents. I'm still confused about myself though: I'm atheist, but I have a strong stage red inside me. Also highly impulsive, ego-centric and power obsessed. I'm making small bounds into blue by introducing discipline and strong values among other things. So I thought I was in stage red-blue, until I heard that atheism starts at stage orange which makes it impossible for me to be red. In this thread people said you can't be in more than 2 stages, so I'm still confused how I fit into red-blue-orange. I know but I thought one needed to fully integrate the previous stage before leveling up. So is it possible to be for example orange and still have some unprocessed stage red?

A lot of people tend to say they are religious but they don't act religious. I think my parents fall into that category. Such people are hard to categorize since they are somewhere in the middle of atheism and religion. They don't fit into the two boxes. And if you ask them they don't know it themselves. With my parents it depends on the situation if they would act like they are atheist or religious. By the way I never heard them say they are atheist but they never acted as a religious person neither.

@Rilles My family is egocentric/impulsive/power hungry so (mostly) stage red but they are at the same time atheist which is stage orange you say. I really don't get this and I read the book.

That is true but I'm not that far. In my case I lack requisite variety or in other words: lack of dating experience. I don't want to settle with a good girl at this point. It would make me too depended on her and she won't be attracted to that anyway. Probably become resentful towards me before it ends. A female's sense of love is very different than a male's sense of love. It was a bitter pill to swallow but as they say: the truth will set you free.

It is a trade off. If you are a 10 you can get a 10 otherwise you need to make trade offs. Men trade off a lot of things for a female's good look. Females tend to do the opposite of that. Personally I look for good looks and her potential to level up with me, since I'm not that high in the spiral myself. That profile is hard to find that is why I just look for stage red girls so I can pop my cherry and move up. Most people don't want to change so I don't have an option.

Women care about looks of the man to the extend that they don't want deformed or ugly children (unconscious process). That is why they also look at guys who are somewhat muscular, tall but they also look at intelligence or money. Since intelligence and money present power and that is good for her survival and for the survival of her (potential) kids. I've started looking at women differently and it helped me a lot. Stop listening to what women say they want. Don't follow her or listen to her. Develop a good intuition. She will respect you for it. Edit: that last part was my stage red flaring up