StarStruck

Loving means accepting the truth. Loving what is coming at you and loving life will change how you live your life. It is life transformative.

I thought android was high consciousness. Leo bragged about Samsung so I bought a good one. Omg, I'm just trying not to pull my hair out. I'm tech savvy and a programmer so I know how to tweak a simple OS. So this is the problem: When I receive emails I don't get notification on the screen. Just a moment ago I got an email. Coincidently I heard the email sound. Otherwise I would never know about the email. It DOES show up in the notification system when I scroll down, but it DOESN'T show on the main screen. With main screen I mean the screen that pops up after you turn the screen on. It has a time stamp on it and below it does show notifications of other apps but not the most important app which is outlook.

It is tragicomic to see how positive I'm in my last post, and the post before that I was very dark and sinister. Only shows that how fragile my ego is. I need a stronger ego boundaries. I still have to read that damn book called anti-fragility.

First signs of abundance So today I tasted abundance with dating for the first time in my life. Yesterday, the blonde girl (who cancelled our third date) took contact with me and said she wanted to meet on Tuesday. And secondly, that hot Thai girl I met last week, said she wanted to go for a coffee after next week because of her exams and essays. It is a milestone in my life. It is the first time in my life TWO girls are simultaneously interested in me and want to meet up. It is time to celebrate this. Girls peaking at me in the gym I was in the gym today. I saw one girl look at me. At the end of my session I saw another girl looking at me. It seems that girls can smell a guy with confidence, abundant, carefree attitude who has humour. Eyecontact game is so important. I'm bad at it. I'm bad at it. I'm bad at holding tension. I don't know even what is going on in my head. I noticed that I'm not rested in my head space and that is probably the reason why I can't calm down and hold fucking eye contact. I don't know how I come across but probably I seem like a horny dog who wants to fuck her or kill her. Couldn't even crack a smile at these girls. Hot girls have a good nose for confident, carefree, present and funny energy in guys The second one in the gym was reallllly hot blonde, tight luscious perfect body. Just absolute perfection She was eyeing me up but when she saw me not being present, not being able to hold eye contact, she stopped eyeballing me. It is just scary how good hot girls are good at eyeballing a guy. Especially hot girls, a lot of guys are approaching these girls so they have a good intuition. Also hot girls like this don't have to do anything. The most they will do is give you eye contact. If you don't take the chance, she will just give another guy a chance. It is a game of the fittest. I got frustrated how subtle game is, and how I lost the subtle game against her, at the same time it also gave me hope. If I get my inner game straight, I do have a chance with the top shelf girls. The investments I made in pickup is not even that big, but the rewards are so big. Approach regret or stupidity? So last two days I missed 3-4 girls who were eyeballing me. I didn't approach. The reason is this: I'm already out of my comfort zone. I have two girls who are interested in me. The one will meet me tuesday, the other one after next week. This is already a huge deal and I'm afraid of ego backlash. I already feel like a fish out of water and I feel tense. I need to chill out because there is no danger. I'm trying to get myself but I don't know where this unconscious tenseness comes from. Probably I shouldn't bite more than I can chew. Currently I have two girls in my rotation. I can't handle more. I'm also dealing with nofap and other stuff. I'm fine. Will I be able to allow myself to calm down, take a chill pill, not constantly look for targets to approach and plan things out and just enjoy what I have right now?

She might find somebody better or you might find somebody better. Or jealousy might come into play....You might also become jealous when she goes with bigger guys than you.

Is she OK with it? If so it would be a no brainer..

It is a very personal question. Leo is a different person than you. But we have something all in common. We are all men and we want to live our hearts out in the candy shop. I talked to old people who found their gf early on and never had other gfs. They tell me they don't regret it and they don't have FOMO. I don't buy it. They sold themselves the idea that they didn't miss out. That is really the bottom line. What do you want to sell yourself? There is no good or wrong. There is only contentment and regret. You really need to figure it out yourself. People here are just trying to sell you something.

One can find reasons to do something. One fan find reasons to not do something. Feelings like horniness are just feelings. Don't be a slave of your feelings. People who are live a miserable life. Find the courage. Don't waste your valuable energy - too much. Your sperm is holy. It can create life. And your body needs a lot of resources to create it. It is a finite source. Be wary on what you want to use it. I spend a lot of time fapping instead of chasing girls. Porn addiction is close to my heart as a thorn. It hurts. Buddhists talk about semen retention and the benefits of it. I don't need to repeat centuries old wisdom. On this forum there is a lot of foolishness about semen retention and the benefits of it. I'm not against PMO. Personally I don't want to do it because it is and was a coping mechanism to deal with stress. I'm not against porn, just as a fat guy shouldn't be against chocolate cake, but it would be a wise decision if he stayed away from that chocolate cake for his own good. If you can't deal with the stress of having semen in your balls and bust it in a paper tissue, it is OK as long as you are aware what you are doing and the price you are paying. As the stoic say do whatever you like but aware of the costs. Sexual energy is raw masculine energy. If you are able to tame that stallion, you will reach outrageous things. I'm in the process of taming the stallion. Some inspiration: https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/rebooting-accounts/rebooting-accounts-page-1/age-20-ed-cured-morning-wood-is-back-more-social-confident-no-more-brain-fog/

My deep issues Lack if self love and bad self image is really at the core of my problems. I'm suffering. I feel so depended on this girl. I feel like I'm pulled by my strings. When she takes some hours to text back I'm just holding my heart, not wanting to be hurt or rejected. I'm so sad to see myself like this in third person. I really need to work on this. Holding my heart in my hands If my heart gets broken my ego tells me to become a hardcore PUA and become ruthless. I really try not to hate women. They have something I want. I'm not getting it. I'm getting hurt and confused. I see total dick heads who are naturals being much more successful with girls. Revving while being in idle That is really how one can describe me. I'm revving while being in idle. Last post I type that I don't approach a lot. Today I just approached one girl. And in this post I tell myself girls don't like me? Actually a lot of girls like me. I get a lot of "you are so nice" and "you are so sweet". That won't get me in their pants though. I hate when I get compliments like that and more precisely I hate being nice and I don't know how to stop it. I'm confused, hurt and angry. I need a plan. Probably going to read some red pill books that I planned a while back. When I'm nice or when I'm told I'm nice. I feel like my child self who was beaten into being nice. I don't want to be that anymore. I'm going to break lose of that mental prison.

I did one approach today and she liked me a lot but she had a bf. Some notes: Guy with emotion to a girl is like honey to a bee The more I opened up and showed emotion. The closer she got to me. At first she was standoffish and towards the end she was all up in my face. Opening up as a person, showing your upright emotion, (meaning what kind of effect she has on you), is like a flower opening up. If you (as the flower) don't open up, the bee (the girl) can't come to cross pollinate or get nectar. The girl, like the bee, doesn't care about cross pollinating, it only cares about the nectar which for her is the emotion. Will all girls like your "nectar"? That question is really secondary. As a pickup artist, it is just important to just open up like a flower and do nature do its work, if she likes the smell of your nectar she will come to you. That is really what attraction is. If you are attractive you don't have to push yourself in her face. Just open up like a flower and attraction will do its work. That is really what emotional connection is really about. There is no forcing. Let chemistry/biology do its thing. For the record, opening up doesn't mean that you should become a pussy. You still need confidence and have humour (which is a pickup artist's nectar), within this framework you can show other emotions to lure her in. Walking the road is the destination She really wanted to give her number but she already has a bf of 2,5 years. It was really not about me getting her number and getting laid. This approach was an experiment: would I be able to get her number? It is not about getting to the destination (getting stuff from her) but about the process of learning. She really wanted it. I could see it but she said no. Usually I would push and what I noticed is that when I push, she even closes up more and puts her guard up. The way is not really pushing for anything, but just making observations. I told her "I can see in your eyes you want to give me your number". She dropped her resistance. I was really getting close but then her friend came along (that she was waiting for) and it was too late. Peer pressure I noticed this more than once. If a girl is waiting for another girl, and you ask her number when her friend is approaching, it is always a no. I mean, she already has a bf, her giving a number to a random guy while her friend is watching her knowing she has a gf is strange. I should have asked about her logistics (how soon her friend was coming) and planned my strategy better. Not approaching a lot I really stopped approaching a lot. For me pickup is really exposure therapy. I already got one girl (blonde with whom I already had 2 dates but she cancelled the third date last week) who is interested in me and she hit me up yesterday. She didn't ask me for a date. She just asked what I was up to after having radio silence for couple of days. I kind of hoped she would but I think she wants me to ask her. She is a shy girl. And I don't want to be the guy that always asks her but I guess she wants to be the submissive "lady" or something. I'm really focusing on my inner struggle. I see pickup as my outer struggle. But as they say in spirituality, inner and outer is a duality that doesn't exist. But sometimes dualities can be useful, I'm following my intuition and it says that I need to get my shit in order. I'm lazy as fuck, not happy with my productivity and slacking off with sports and other things. @Vytas thank you, I'm glad that I can motivate others to do the same thing.

I had a nightmare where my crush found somebody better because I was so slow passed and not assertive enough. I saw she found somebody new on social media. This was all happening within my dream so in my dream I looked at my watch. It was 4:03. I woke up from my dream and it was 4:03. This happened to me couple of times and it is very scary. Every time it happened it is accurate to the minute. How this can happen just blows my mind. Does it have a certain meaning?

If you "hook" a girl and she likes you. You can stop chasing her and she will keep coming back. Blonde girl started hitting me up again after canceling our third date. I did 2 quick approaches on my way to the supermarket. I approached while she was walking and just kept walking with her. The first one bailed out. With the second one I hooked but it turned out she is a Cypriot and she doesn't like my ethnicity. She flat out told me that. I laughed it off and kept talking. The conversation was fun and she will leave town in one week so nothing happened. I'm just following the dao.

Female version of redpill is called feminism and it is so widespread that they don't really need a fringe platform for it. lol.

This thread is not about pickup but the answers found in this thread will help you with pickup: I like Leo's explanation of what a doormat (nice guy) is and a person who is bigger. Leo says: People tell me I made progress but I'm nowhere where I want to be. I discovered that I really lack values and principles that flow out of these values. The more I do pickup the more I come face to face with this. Last few days I didn't do any pickup. I was very busy and I see across the board problem in my life: lack of spiral dynamics stage blue values. I was already aware of this lack but it becomes clear with everyday. Thus to improving my game is an internal struggle, that is, developing spiral dynamics stage blue values. Not only will that improve my game. It will also improve my life across the board Characteristics of stage blue thinkers https://spiraldynamicsintegral.nl/en/blue/ What are the general characteristics of the Blue value system? (with my commentary) Values and norms, discipline, duty, regularity, and feelings of honor and guilt (this is what we need for pickup but also to be successful in life in general) WE versus They Thinking (this is really the pickup mindset, thinking about the interest of your dick first, because women think of their pussy first) Searching for meaning, order, routine and security (when doing game you develop this, what you find important changes, still need to develop good routines in my life though) Self-control, discipline and loyalty to the doctrine and the rules (values over short term interest) Morality (if you want long term relationship with a girl this is important for girls, for short term it is better to have no morals) Obedience based on a sense of duty and a sense of guilt (if you are a guy and you are not doing what you suppose to do you will get these feelings) Organize, manage, concretize and structure (for true learning) Values effort and responsibility and shows discipline How do you recognize the presence of Blue? Blue is recognized by the clear presence of order and structure. The form of the game is the topic of conversation, not the game itself. In conversations, people will talk more about the rules of the game than the content. (AKA structure versus content) How do you recognize the absence of Blue? Chaotic. A lack of fixed rules and actions are mainly ad hoc. Many changes of direction prompted by changing life conditions. People are emotionally involved and also express this. Starting-up projects but not finishing them. What are positive stimuli for Blue? (I was already going this unconscious in game, but I will be more conscious about it) Make SMART agreements Be clear about structure and process Plan, Do, Act and Check. And follow through. Say what you do and do what you say My previous post about this topic which is a great addition Currently I'm not feeling very well about my pickup journey. It is part of the journey. I proved I can do it. I made big leaps out of my comfort zone. I've gone on dates but I haven't got the results I wanted. Still if I compare my game to what I was in the beginning of this thread, I reached milestones. If anything pickup exposed all my deficiencies, not only as a dude who wants his rocks off, but my deficiencies in general as a human being. My reflexes in the past would have been to look away. It is painful to look at one's deficiencies. I have a lot of emotional pain and confusion, which is good. It means I'm growing. But is not issue. I asked regular people for advice, and I got dumb struck by the low quality of questions I asked them. I asked them how I could get over my emotional pain and confusion. Asking such questions is like a dude in the gym asking why his muscles hurt. It is really part of the game. It showed me how low consciousness I'm. In the book Mastery by George Leonard they talk about the keys to mastery: Good instruction: having a good mentor and good sources to learn Intentionality: having a clear mind's eye picture of what you want for yourself, how you want to sculpt yourself Surrendering to the journey: in other words having faith in the outcome and being in the process, letting go of fear so the heart can open Practise: making routines (which I talked about in above posts) Seeking the edge: going out of the comfort zone is the only way to grow, this is where the learning happens Sometimes learning can get muddy. I'm a person who doesn't like to waste time and just sits back and thinks about the perfect strategy. The problem is that life goes on. 3-4 months have past. Perhaps I would have learned more if I just plowed through the mud like the "dumb people". Perhaps I'm not that smart. This is probably my biggest lesson in this thread so far: I don't think dumb people are smarter than me, they have lower consciousness than me, they just plow through the mud and get across the swamp. Perhaps they didn't cross in the most efficient and effective way but they are getting places. My pickup friend and some people I know who are not very smart but who are successful in business follow this principle of plowing through. What is the right mindset to plow through the mud? The keys of Mastery by George Leonard gives us a good grasp.

Relationships are get and give. You want something from him. You want to get something. Nobody likes to be with a person who gets more than he or she gives. I'm struggling with this too so I'm not above it. Just fake it until you make it. I never tell I bitch I love her. I let her fall in love with me although I like her too. It is basically an inner struggle. There is something inside of you that you project on the other. You need to sort that out.

The golden rule with dating is: you get what you are.

This thread helped me a lot with texting: it answered all my doubts, worries an insecurities.

I got some real good advice. I feel much more confident texting right now. Thank you guys! As for that girl who cancelled our third date. I'm going to wait for her to set a new date. I'm really tired of pickup and chasing. Also I think it is important to get in touch with my feelings and intuition. I always ask people advice and people give contradicting advice. I feel like I get pulled in every direction. I need to learn to set my own direction.

Is less more? What to talk about? How frequent to text girls? What is the dynamic? The advice on the internet is so various. I'm confused and insecure about texting. For example: How to text a girl I just met today? I wished her lucks with her exams next week. How to proceed? Or Girl I suppose to meet today canceled our date. It would have been our third date. She asked if we could meet another time. Just wait it out and wait for her iniative?

After yesterday I just decided to have a lousy Saturday. I got drunk in the beginning of the afternoon. Hit the gym, talked to some people I know there, talk to a girl I know from the park, and went to the supermarket. In the supermarket I saw 3 lovely ladies. I decided not to approach. I just wanted to observe myself. I noticed how I was a sad boy. Looking for attention and trying to be confident and assertive. I got sad. I was tipsy. I didn't need to approach. The emotions already had an impact on me. My emotions told me that I won't live forever and that I should enjoy my youth and talk to as many hot girls as I like. For today though, I was just going to observe. I believe already took action enough this week. Don't fear approaching. Fear time.

I'm so much this guy: lmao This is so true: What love is about: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ricfZxjExt0 Not a lot is needed to get girls, I shouldn't make it a big deal:

@Arcangelo that is my style too but sometimes I feel that girls become cold if you get their number, don't text for a week and then show up out of nowhere. Buying temperature with the girl becomes very cold. She really has to like me to accept. Are you not afraid of that? How would you pull to your house? I asked her on the first date to come with me to watch a movie and she said no. If she accepts another date, it will be the third date. That is really good. I guess one can use this type of conversational fish baits more than once. I'm considering use this type of conversational fish baits couple of times per week but guys in this thread say only to hit her up to get a date. I might experiment with conversational baits with a girl I met recently and that I'm not very invested in. The girl who flaked yesterday (and that I'm very invested i) I'm going to be very standoffish with, wait 3 days or something and then hit her up for a new date. Preferably I would like her hitting me up but we will see.

That is what I was thinking. I just have to wait it out in order to make judgements. If she doesn't want to meet next week, it is safe to say my pessimism was right. That is true but I don't want to stay with her on the long term anyway. Perhaps short and mid term. If I messed it up by being a weasel and missed out on fun and sex it is my mistake. I'm just going to wait it out for couple of days. You hit the nail. I'm trying to stop making assumptions but it is hard to not do it. This video helped me a little bit: This is a good book I should read: Attached Are you Anxious, Avoidant or Secure? How the science of adult attachment can help you find - and keep - love

@NoSelfSelf thanks. That was my plan too to wait 3 days. When she canceled the date I sent her something. She didn't even give me a reply when I said I hope she would feel better. I actually liked this girl. Probably even fell a little bit in love with her. This is such a disappointment.

You might be right. I feel so dumb right now. How would you do damage control? I told her it is OK and we could meet another time when she feels better. @NoSelfSelf