StarStruck

I'm taking the Janssen vaccination. 1 is enough. If it is next year I will take the other type too, if needed.

I would be funny that after so many pages Leo would decide not to go on the tour. It would be plausible. He is health issues.

That is like saying don't take a painstiller now for your headache because next year you will perhaps maybe get another headache.

I'm getting 1 vaccine. I don't need 2.

Frustration can be used to keep my old patterns. Or frustration can be used to create new patterns. It all starts in the brain and thinking patterns. There is where the ignition happens. I need to have patience. First and foremost I need to finish my no fap journey. I got some good advice here: But people don't seem to understand my struggle. I do get it though. It is hard to understand.

I'm currently doing no fan (monk mode) and I can't have sex. So we are into each other. We had couple of dates. She says I should come over next week. I'm afraid of this because I'm doing nofap and trying to heal my brain. In the past I told a girl about nofap and she freaked out. I need some advice on this hot 21 year old blonde girl. Because I'm afraid I will lose her if I gave her bad sex. I rather not have sex with her, completely my 30 day challenge and go from there.

That truly transcending to read that. I'm aware I need to let go of my outdated self-concepts. No-fap community says rewiring through having sex with real life girls it the way to heal but currently I'm in the reboot phase. I need to give my brain and nervous system a rest. My dopamine receptors are fucked up and that is why I don't enjoy slow or normal sex. Perhaps holding her off will make her more horny, or perhaps she will think I'm a boon and scoot off. Time will tell.

Elliot Hulse is a boon and an idiot with an irritating voice but sometime he has some good things to say: Summary of video: making plan is as important as taking action, save energy and time by having routine plans Summary: penetrate the feelings (feminine: body) with the mind (masculine: mind), birth happens from darkness/shadow/stillness, become one with darkness/shadow/stillness before "show time", have mental trigger "ahhhh" Summary: there is no self-control without self-awareness: notice when you are nice guy (don't judge but just observe, note down triggers in body tenseness), have confidence in yourself based on being(acting with trust and faith), don't judge because what you resist persists instead just observe. Let body tenseness go through breathing and loosening up the body.

Quick two approaches on my way to the supermarket. First approach: what I could have done differently/better? Opened ad-hoc, verbals were going good, she was more engaged than me, but I was still in the "hooking phase"; I should have moved to "vibing phase": asking names, where she is from, etc I was so overcompensating in the hooking phase that I even fist bumped her shoulder. Previously I told myself to not do this. A lot of girls don't like it when an unknown guy does it. I was just so pumped up. I couldn't help myself. When I asked her to have a smoke together sometime, she told me I was too direct My confidence was good but I was still a little in my head and I need to ditch the nervous smile/laugh. Vibes were good, there was a lot of fun but lack of direction ruined it. She was so feminine. If I was masculine, it would have been a done deal. I lacked direction. In conclusion: this girl was sooo into me but I messed it up. It is good to be excited but fist bumping her shoulder, being over-enthusiastic, doing premature pulls, is not it! Bottom line: I should have toned tone the emotional spiking when I reached the hook point and proceeded to vibing Second approach: what I could have done differently/better? This was a shy girl. She was a little stunned and that made me a little stunned. What this tells me is that I need to work on my mental frame and not be so quickly put off balance by a girl. I really need to ditch the nervous smile This approach was too "on script", if I pushed the approach a little bit "off script" it would have gone better. She was in her head and the silliness would have pulled her from there. The problem is that I didn't have a lot of time to work on her. We had some nice moments but she was very much in her head. If I was better at vibing I would have had a better chance. Bottom line: I need to work on vibing. Being relaxed. Have a natural and better flow. Let go of emotional resistance. Be more present and aware. Summary: I really liked experimenting with higher energy levels. Just being more pumped up, present and grounded in my body gave me two very volatile approaches. The girls were definitely not bored, they liked it, but I guess I was a little bit uncalibrated. To my defence, it is hard to be calibrated when you are doing something new. Especially when I'm approaching with higher energy than usual. It is hard to tame a wild horse.

I'm afraid I won't be able to get hard because I experience flat line where my libido just plummets. It is very random. Yea, I definitely have that chaser effect. Thanks, I will look into tantra. Personally I don't enjoy slow sex though. Probably because of my programming by porn use.

Amazing video that shows how to balance being a dick and a nice guy; finding the right balance between those two polarities by being calibrated.

This thread is really a gem. lmao

Consciousness in-for-mation is wisdom. Wisdom is gained through labor and nobody can do it for you. It is similar to pushing weights in the gym. Just looking at somebody lifting weights won't make your own muscles bigger. It is OK to look but then you have to do it yourself.

Can't help everybody. Decides need to be made.

How do you mean you are I'm begging to fantasize?

As long as the core of Europe (west Europe) is not touched we are fine with it. Russia can have Ukraine and Poland. Why should we fight fight US interests?

Eat grass fed meat and greens. Drink lots of water. Eat fish and fish eggs. Eat different kind of fruits. And healthy carbs. You can't really go wrong if you do this.

Survival is important to exist but also important for spirituality. If you don't have a body you can't do spirituality. The body is really your temple but also your dojo. If you can't beat up a motherfucker you are missing that vital energy that males should have to get shit done. When talking to dudes who have this energy you can just sense it. Me as a male can sense it. Girls can sense it too. That is why nice guys don't do well with anything and especially not with girls. The girl knows if he is weak with me he is also weak in other high pressure situations.

What is it called?

Bad side of pickup is that I know a lot of girls from my city. Even the girls who rejected me, they recognize on me street and say hi or have some small talk. I really don't like this aspect. I notice that I get needy and cringe and still try to hook them. Damn this neediness (thirsting) is hard to get out of my system.

At the same time there is also unrest. I want more girls. And I can already tell this is just hedonistic adaption. I can recognize the pattern. I can see the same pattern in all of my addictions. I don't want pickup to become just another addiction. A bottomless pit.. a destiny of discontent and suffering. Pickup has become an ego thing for me. The soar thumb called my fragile ego or negative self-image. I'm trying to self-medicate my negative self-image by getting girls. I'm getting old. I'm 32. I don't have a lot of time to fuck around like a 22 year old stud. I wish I could be 22 again with the knowledge that I have but that is such an absurd, impossible and unhealthy wish. I will give myself to enjoy the fruits of my labor. Although the fruits are not that much. Considering my highly traumatic past it is not bad I guess. If anything pickup has given me a broader perspective on things. I'm still fucking around, wasting a lot of time, but it is because of lack of consciousness. That causes me to have such a low elevation negative view on myself. I'm battling with my shadow. That is what really should be my goal: self-actualization, the natural fruits of self-actualization (byproducts) are girls.

Usually I don't enjoy romantic or sensual sex. When I have sex it is usually very hard and it is sex based on lust. To make it more graphic. Some girls really like that. Girls that are as psychopathic as me I guess but most girls don't like that. Especially if it is your gf or wife, it is not appropriate sex I think. It is definitely a trauma related kink. I was physically abused as a kid and probably this is way to act it out. I'm already in trauma healing and I did a lot of EMDR to process my past but apparently there is still unprocessed stuff in my psyche. By the way, I think it is OK to be masculine and dominate a girl but it becomes problematic if you have sex with her like you are punishing her.

He lived life to the fullest. I rather have his life than have a boring life. Excluding the teenage shit in my mouth. LoL.

I have two dates set up. It feels great to have abundance. Not having the need to constantly scan for hot girls and thinking about approaching. I like the tranquility and inner rest. Weirdly enough now I get more eye contact than ever though.

We are both speculating here since psychedelics is uncharted territory for science in terms of effects on the body.