Raptorsin7

@SriBhagwanYogi Ok I'll keep going and try and gain some insights from Mooji. Thanks

Hi, I've been practicing self inquiry recently by bouncing my awareness between two points, like my visual field and my hand for example, and then by trying to turn this awareness on itself or on the general sense of perception I feel during meditation. However, whenever I do this I feel a lot of resistance and I can't maintain the attention for more than a few seconds. I understand single pointed attention on awareness itself over time is what will lead to an enlightenment experience, but i'm wondering if there is something I can do to increase the amount of time I actually spend focused on awareness itself. Does this sound like i'm on the path or is there anything i'm missing? Any insights would be appreciated.

@SriBhagwanYogi Does the ego go beyond the feeling of "I" in the mind? I no longer feel identified strongly with the "I" in my mind even though most my life still operates through this "I". So do you think I have incorrectly identified the witness during my self-inquiry and when I turn attention on the witness I am simply turning attention towards more ego? I will begin to watch Mooji, thanks for the recommendation.

@Salvijus Thank you, I'll try his techniques during my next sit.

@SriBhagwanYogi But isn't it true that sustained focus on the "one" is necessary to break through? Do you think if I solved your riddle/question in the moment that it would be sufficient to break through?

@SriBhagwanYogi I don't how to describe what I think is the watcher, but in those moments my concentration sort of snaps I can always try and re orient my awareness to the watcher. But constantly refocusing my awareness to the watcher seems like its too forced but Idk.

@Neorez Hey I've been a scratcher and a nail biter almost my entire life, and recently I've gone long stretches without biting my nails so Ill try and give some advice based on why I think I've stopped. First, don't beat your self up about the habit and i'd recommend coming to peace with the behavior and don't demonize yourself or it. Second, I would take up meditation so you can become more aware of the circumstances surrounding the nail biting. There is likely some feeling/thought pattern that is occurring that is prompting the urge to nail bite. You don't nail bite 24/7 so clearly there are times where you aren't thinking about it and then bam you get the urge, try and understand and observe that pattern and I think it will help a lot. Good luck.

@Skanzi @Nahm @d0ornokeyThank you all so much for your thoughtful replies, this is my first post on the forum and the fact that this is the level of detail that I received on the first re few replies is pretty astonishing. A quick follow up, since the "high" point of my life I've been meditating diligently for ~ 2 years, and for the past few months I've begun with self inquiry meditations, so in many ways I agree with the sentiments I am more evolved now than I was in the past, especially considering the fact that never in my life before this had I really taken spirituality or enlightenment seriously. I have no desire to go back to a point in my life whereby I didn't understand the potential of a practice of meditation/enlightenment, but at the same time its difficult more to me to accept that in the meantime I am not enlightened and there exists a version my self that is more confident, has higher esteem, etc that I don't have access too. My plan is to continue with the contemplation about this "higher" state, and I will also contemplate on why I feel I need/want this state in the first place. Also, given that I don't really have anyone to discuss these things with in my life I feel like i'm going to be asking a lot of questions on this forum, but at the same time I don't really know what the limits are for clarification/insight. I feel like I could ask for 1000 clarification points on this thread alone but that seems very selfish and isn't fair to other people here. Any insight on how to balance the desire to seek thorough advice, without sucking up too many resources would be appreciated. Thanks a lot guys.

Hey, I recommend trying to cultivate more positive habits like and meditation, rather than trying to focus on actively removing the negative thoughts. I think whatever habit patterns you are engaged in right now, whether you're aware of this or not, are contributing to your negative thoughts. If you can change your habits/physical circumstances then you may be more successful in removing the negative thoughts. This video really helped me overcome similar negative thinking patterns, and I think if you can really internalize and act on this advice it will make a huge difference. Keep looking for solutions, eventually you will move past this. Good luck man.