Raptorsin7

@Key Elements Yea that makes more sense to me. Why does everyone need to live in a commune. The world exists. We are some of the most privileged people in the world. We owe it to the world to be apart of it. But everyone's path is different. Maybe a commune could work.

@DrewNows This guy gets it. That is the issue. I am not truly letting go on the court. I always feel resistance. Not sure how to let go completely though.

@Pramit Have you thought about doing an hour but just adjusting yourself during the meditation. Usually if i experience pain I can adjust myself slightly and the tension gets released. Don't buy the hype about not moving during meditation. When you are starting out, 1 hour of meditation with slight movements is better than 30 minutes of no movement.

@TrynaBeTurquoise Fair point. But you haven't addressed my point about being your best on game day. Everything is cause and effect. There's clearly something i'm doing when i'm playing well compared to what i'm doing when i check out of games. I'm just not aware of the triggers. I am the best player on the team. I want to win. If one of my teammates is scoring every play, do you think i'm going to take the ball from him? If i score 0 points and we dominate then that's perfect. But we almost lost to 2 trash tier teams and I did not have a good game. I wouldn't want to play on your team either. The feeling is mutual.

@TrynaBeTurquoise I have had games where i'm absolutely unstoppable. Then i have games where i can't score a point and i give up on the game. The night and day difference between some of my games is insane. It's literally all mental. Peak performance is about getting yourself to be your best in the moment. I'm not asking how can i go beat lebron james in 1 on1. I'm asking what can i do to be the best version of my self on thursday.

@Key Elements Yea, if it's part of your LP and you embody non-duality then people will gravitate to you. You will have such a strong impact on the people around you, and if you genuinely believe in your product you will be successful. I never thought of net working from that angle until you just mentioned it.

@Key Elements If you're going to do a forum feature do one that is very niche and specific to your product. Unless you want to just copy Leo's forum.

What am I thinking about now? I have an intramural basketball playoffs on thursday. I really want to win this championship. We are the best team by far, and there's no excuse for us to lose. We almost lost the first 2 rounds, and i did not play well. I need to dominate this game. I'm not sure how i'm going to prepare but I need to do something. I need to get my self in the zone. I need to adopt the mind of a fucking psycho winner for this game. I made a post about it, hopefully someone has some good advice. I got an A on my legal writing assignment. It's hard to get A's in law school so this is a good move. But honestly i'm just happy i didn't get a shitty mark. The first thing that came to mind is that i would be happier if i could just brag about it to everyone. But clearly that's nonsense. I need to update my dream board. Nahm gave me some harsh advice in a thread a few weeks ago i need to find it and add it to my board. The board fucking works, but i stopped using it for the past few days. Why did i stop if it works? Very strange. Today after yoga i will update it. I wonder what people think when they read this. Proactive told me i'm lost. Part me was mad he said that. I'm not fucking lost buddy. But i am lost. I don't think it's a bad thing though. In order to be found first i must be lost. I feel pretty good. I feel engaged. Is this hypomania? I've been very manic in my posts recently... But it feels right... I don't know. I always thought mania was a good thing if it could be controlled. I've had 1 full on manic episode in my life and it wasn't even that bad. I remember i didn't study for an exam and i tried learning everything the night before and i couldn't do it. Then i felt like dropping out, and my uncle told me i'm being manic. I think dropping out was the right choice then and i missed that chance. What happens if i do the same here? If i stick it out will i just regress back to my old ways? I don't think so. What's happening now cannot be undone so easily. Meditation has given me something to fall back on. No matter what happens i have a path. The journey to the divine beyond is all but guaranteed (prophet of truth- Halo 2?)

@Proactive Ok i will try that. I already do a lot of meditation but i've never really focused in on the feeling and thoughts of not liking school. Thanks.

@Average Investor Yoga is pretty intense. I always feel good after i finish class and the sweat is good. I will definitely look into running. I used to try running all the time but i would quit very easily, like 1 mile in and i would just give it up. I feel stronger mentally now, i should give running another shot. I will reply with the life i want to live on this post. But i am not ready yet, i have exams coming up and i want to take my time with that post. I will also consider the gratitude exercise you mentioned. I am never really grateful throughout the day. And one of the hallmarks of the dream life i see in my mind is the fact that i'm just amazed and astonished at how awesome my life is. I always thought get good life first then gratitude will come naturally. Thanks for the replies man, you seem have to a lot figured out.

@Fede83 Lol thanks, i think i deserve one too (: Yes, we must be completely free. If you go into a relationship expecting the other person to complete you or fill the holes, the relationship will be a disaster. If you are both complete, then the love and the relationship will be easy. If you could choose one or the other what would you choose? Complete happiness and freedom with or without your partner? Or dependence on them to make you happy?

@dimitri What is your meditation practice like?

Yes, there is something wrong with this. I think once you are genuinely happy and satisfied with life and are completely ok with never having a girlfriend even if you die alone, then you will be ready for a girlfriend. But i'm not sure. I've never had a girlfriend lol.

@Proactive No i haven't. How long do you sit with it? Can you elaborate on what exactly you're doing, and what happens?

I don't think alcohol is bad if you're using it like you mentioned above. It becomes a problem when people use alcohol as a coping mechanism to deal with reality. It can be toxic if you consume it frequently but only a few times a month will not hurt you. Especially if you're out being social too, it's probably just balanced with the positive effects of socializing. You sound like you are on the right path. Keep it up.

Yoga and then meditation is a dream combo. I started doing yoga 3 months ago, and i always come home and just meditate or listen to Ekkart tole or Mooji and i'm making incredible progress. Keep it up

What am i thinking right now? So, last night during an hour of self inquiry i had a moment of selflessness. I think at least. It was so brief, i remember looking for the self and there was a moment where I felt like the person looking was disappearing and then i had a bright feeling of everything. I'm not sure if this was just a distorted memory or not but i'm not sure. My yoga practice is growing a lot. I'm starting to able to endure the pain of class without hating it. When i look for the one who is suffering in yoga it makes a huge difference. But still no flow yet. I want flow in yoga, but i guess i just need to be patient. I had a conversation with my family about me not liking law school. I think they think i'm just being kinda crazy right now. Which is kinda true. When i messaged them i was so annoyed and frustrated working on the assignment. I mean they have a point right?? I'm obviously suffering a lot now and when i honestly express my suffering they think i'm just being crazy and want me to calm down and just go back to being a good son. But then when i feel a bit better i just don't express myself to them and then they think everything is fine. Financial independence is so important to me. I don't like being dependent on my parents. Actually I like it. I just don't like the strings that come attached to their support. When i have children they will be enlightened as kids so they won't have go through all this bull shit nonsense i'm going through now. I really need to step up my studying. My midterms are coming up and i'm not prepared. I mean i've been here before, in undergrad i was never ready until the day before the exam. But maybe i'm just saying this to make myself feel better about my situation. Who knows. MAJOR INSIGHT FROM MEDITATION: I gotta stop trying so hard to live. I dont even fucking exist. All this me, me , me , me ,me is all bull shit. Where am i? I've always been in control. This is my life, i'm the fucking man, right? Wrong. Let it go. Surrender control. I will never be happy if it's me trying to be happy. I have to take a back seat. I'm going to try looking for myself throughout the day when i feel frustrated or lost in thought. Look i'm creating more roles for myself.... I AM GOING TO APPLY THE MEDITATIVE INSIGHTS TO MY LIFE. No i'm fucking not though. I don't know how this is going to work practically, but this is the path. Less thoughts, more action from the present moment. Just do what fucking feels right.

@Average Investor Hey man, thanks for taking the time to respond to my journal. I don't spend a lot of time on social media. I'm not comparing my life against other people's. I compare my life against what I believe is possible based on my imagination. But the same rule applies. I compare my life against some ideal fantasy that doesn't exist and it robs me of happiness in the present moment. I think that's how it works anyways. I do yoga like 4 or 5 times a week, and i play intramural basketball once a week. But I don't think i exercise enough if i'm being honest. I think i need to push myself to wake up and go do yoga, rather than just do it at night like i currently do it. Yea, my diet is so bad it's embarrassing. I don't really have a strong drive to overhaul my diet, i'm just making minor adjustments right now. Like today i bought only a coffee instead of the coffee and the muffin. I am only smoking weed at night, and I think it's made a huge difference in my meditation practice. In the long run i will most likely have to give it up, but it's made a huge positive impact on my yoga practice and my meditation practice so I am not willing to give it up yet. What do you think my problem is? What would you do if you were me?

Surfs up... I still can't get over how you started your journal with that line LOL. It's so awesome.

@Meditationdude I think everything you have described is overwhelmingly positive, and now you're looking for reasons to doubt yourself because it's too good to be true. Let go of this thought story, over and over again. Start trying to live without the thoughts and stories you tell yourself. Slowly, but surely just be.

Rather than looking for the self during self inquiry, what happens if we instead look for the one who is suffering. Early on in the path of self inquiry it be quite boring and unsatisfactory but if attention is turned to the one who is suffering or bored rather than an arbitrary notion of the self this may speed up the progression self realization.

What am i feeling right now? I feel like i'm procrastinating. I know i should be meditating but i'm just on the forum and listening to a podcast. I don't feel too great right now. I just ate junk food. I'm going to meditate for 1 hour then i'm going to come back here and post an update on my feeling. But first i need to describe my feeling clearly so i have a baseline. I feel like i'm stuck on my couch. If someone told me to get up and run a marathon right now i would say it's impossible. I wonder what it would be like if i was the kind of person who could just get up off the couch and run a marathon. I want to get there. The main thing i'm feeling right now is expectation. I want my experience to be something other than what it is. Is this the key? Expectations of my reality? What if i didn't expect anything from reality. What if i was genuinely indifferent? Alright I digress.... time to go into an hour into the void.... !!!!!!

@modmyth 2.5 years. I'm about to finish my first semester.

@Key Elements Interconnecting life purpose and non-duality seems very wise.

@Key Elements I think we all must do what we feel is right for us. If you have confidence and believe in your path it will work for you. All roads lead to the same destination.