Raptorsin7

I think it's time for the spiritual ego phase to end. It's getting annoying acting like a dick, and i think it's time to move forward. I want all the upsides of a spiritiual ego, like confidence, fearlessness, not taking shit from anyone, but i also want none of the downsides. I want: Confidence Humility Grace Love Kindness Peace Quiet Understanding Selflessness Improvement Betterment Growth

@Nahm @dimitri @mandyjw Thank you. Yeah, i've been kind of resistance to doing a full blown trip since my awakening, i was hoping I could do it without the drugs but I think right now they are valuable. I'm planning on cleaning up my apartment, my diet, and some habits over the next few days then i'm going to do like 1.5 to 2 tabs trip.

My long term plan is to be a writer, and express my ideas about self actualization, enlightenment etc. I also want to do life coaching/enlightenment coaching because that was one of the best things i've done on the path so far. In the near term my plan is to get challenger in league of legends, then i'm going to write guides on how to get challenger using spiritual concepts. Meditation, psychidelics, why toxicity is bad, how to be happier playing etc. Once i'm challenger i'm going to start writing and releasing content regularly on my website. Most of my content will be about gaming culture, league of legends itself, why it's important to be happy playing, why toxic competitveness is stupid, stuff like that. I've played games my entire life. I played halo 3 and gears on xbox. I played many years of wow. I played overwatch competitively. So i have quite a diverse background with gaming.

@Nahm okay thanks

I have a question @Nahm. Why can't you enlighten me with a conversation? Like you are clearly ahead of me on the path to enlightenment. But i feel i'm pretty far on the path too. But i still can't feel consistently, which tells me i'm not far on the path haha because i feel this is so basic. But i'm also completely open minded. Like all i want is to feel good, yet it evades me. How come you can't help me solve this simple problem, if you are an infinite intelligence. Surely an infinite intelligence could figure out a way to help a dedicated seeker feel good? Is this another paradox? Do i have to just keep seeing through these because i feel like my thinking is just getting more paradoxical, i.e it doesn't make sense.

@Arcangelo You can be Turqoise at any moment. You just have a lot of limiting beliefs, i.e low self confidence. You can do it. You are way above orange. The fact that you can be on this site without being triggered means you're high conscoiusness. Stop viewing turqoise as some far off thing that you might never achieve. View it as a real, tangible thing that is within your grasp. Because truth is, you can already get to Turqoise. You just have to dare to try for it.

@VeganAwake I'd say focus more on spiritual practices, and spend less time quoting yourself and telling people nothing matters. Totally up to you. Heart. Heart.

@VeganAwake i'm past that. I want more.

The shame that binds you. I have heard this repeated in my head for a few months. I believe it's a message. I really should read this book. I'm pretty sure shame is a key component of my identity as a person.

The shame that binds you. I have heard this repeated in my head for a few months. I believe it's a message. I really should read this book. I'm pretty sure shame is a key component of my identity as a person. How do i detach from what other people think about me. To be truly independent of experience is what I really want. I do not feel free at the moment. The discord from the nuance of thought provides relief. i AM FAT, I AM NOT FAT. There's relief in the duality of thought. How do i perform my best at league.- Answer: Pre game ritual. Meditation. Some exercise. Some visualization.

@VeganAwake I don't mind being judged. My definition of awakening is you feel so good about your self and your life, that you never ask the question again. Your life is better than you could have ever imagined, and it's basically heaven on earth. Also, you perform at your best at whatever you do. You can be sure that you are the absolute best you, you can possibly be. No doubts. Also, a complete understanding of reality. There are no questions as to the big picture, existential question. Complete peace. Honestly, the list is too long to describe. It's more of a you know it when you see it.

@VeganAwake Haha very nice. I would have asked you to the same thing. Non-duality wars are not allowed, and I already got a few warnings We will see who's the most woke though, because when you're fully awake there' s no reason to lie.

@VeganAwake Lol okay i admit i am harsh on you, and I am not done either so fair game. Good joke though, very funny lol. Honestly, I think i'm ahead of you on the path so the discussion would be useless. I'll know in the next few months, i'll be the first to admit i'm wrong dw.

@lostmedstudent Don't listen to @VeganAwake the guy is very confused. He's not done with enlightenment work, yet he thinks he is.

@Surfingthewave Yeah i'm planning on doing more big dosage trips in the near future. I've become much more conscious since my major awakening about a month or so ago, but i haven't gotten back to that christ like consciousness i had so i'm hoping to make progress by hitting that peak more consistently with the LSD. Thanks, and good luck with your emobdiment. This really is the fun part haha. It's almost unfathomable how much better life is post awakening, vs seeking without a clear idea of where it all leads.

@Surfingthewave Thanks i'm working on embodiment as we speak. It's hard, i kinda thought it would be smooth after how I amazing I felt during the awakening but it's been harder to get back to those lvls of consciousness. How has embodiment been going for you? Any thoughts or tips?

@fridjonk No i'm not. My life purpose is about teaching people to be happier playing video games. So it incorporates god consciousness and non-duality because these are the most effective principles to help people improve their well being and happiness. In my view, life purpose allows me to implement all the insights i've had from my awakenings, and allows a path to make money doing something I already love. Like right now i'm trying to get the highest rank in league of legends to gain credibility when i start my website and start writing, and i play multiple hours per day like 4 hours plus. I used to play this much anyways i just never got paid for it, or even realized I could get paid for it lol. I also don't plan on doing this specific company/start up forever. I have other plans in the future too, this is just a logical next step in my life. Life purpose has allowed me a path to complete financial freedom, and then some, basically doing something i love and would do for free, and something i have been doing for free.

What do you mean by choosing of thoughts? How would i not choose a thought? How do i undilute thinking? How do I gain momentum? Assume I had all day to solve this problem, to feel good to find out the true relationship between thinking and feeling. How would I solve this. If my life depended on solving this problem? What would you recommend?

I am passionate about love. I love love. I want love. The question now is how to find love in my direct experience. There's no doubt i've mastered the emotional scale up to passion. I can get to passion no problem. That's easy work. But love is hard work. Love. The final frontier. This is what i want. I love. Love. Love. I wantH love. I love. The answer seems to be THAT I AM LOVE. bUT WHO AM I. I am confused as to who exactly I am here. I am not the body. I am not the eyes. I am not the sensations in my head. I am ever present. I am everywhere, and no where. That doesn't feel right. So who AM I? How about I cultivate some appreciation and gratitude. But it's all about the feeling of gratitude. Thank you for the laptop Thank you for the cell phone Thank you for mastery of the emotional scale, and ease of access to passion Thank you for the time to prepare for the moot, and the opportunity to find good feeling first before i go to the moot Thank you for this experience Thank you for unlimited resources Thank you for this apartment Thank you for this couch Thank you for life purpose Thank you for love. Okay gratitude isn't so great. Doesn't really me tune me up like I hoped it would. @Nahm i got to a place where i was very passionate about love, but then the next step in the emotional scale is actual LOVE. How do i make this jump to the final stage. I feel a warm sensation Wo i think I found love. When I surrender to the experience, stop seeking, and just love what is. There is a warm feeling, it feels like coming home and connection. It feels like my nature is just to love. Like if i just relax then love is the default. Is this it? Also, what is a thought? I remember you telling me how each thought occurs one at a time. But for there is so like so much narrative and words to my thoughts, I thought each time i tuned back into the thought that it was a new thought. But is just the same fucking thought over and over again wtf? Am i stuck on a single thought here? Can you give me a break down on thoughts, and how to use thoughts with feeling. I understand fully now that feeling is prior to, and that thinking must be brought in accordance with feeling. I got that part. But i'm stuck with the choosing of thoughts, like am i just repeating the same old thoughts, how do i create a new thought?

I am getting frustrated while playing the game. I want to cultivate a beutfiful state of being while i'm playing. But it's hard, i keep getting caught up in ego. I get angry, frustrated, blame my teammates. I think i need to give the mind a task. I wonder how to pacify the mind so it's only wholesome and pleasent while playing. No doubt it's about the quality of my thoughts and the degree of connection to who I am. I am going to meditate for about 20 minutes then play another game. I also want to start prepping for moot which is tomorrow. I have some work to do on that and I don't want to do leave until too late.

@Red-White-Light Consciousness is prior to the brain. The brain is occurring within conscious experience. I think it's a mistake to write off experience with the brain, because you can't control your neutrotransmitters or the chemicals in your brain. If they are fucked, then you are fucked. Get it? Detach from the beliefs about consciousness and the brain. Just let it go. You are not a brain. You are not chemicals. YOU are prior to all of this. Find yourself, and the question of insanity will no longer plague you.

@electroBeam Wow good work man. Holy shit you are advancing quickly. I work with @Nahm 1-1, and I think working with someone who's enlightened is hugely important on the path. I 10/10 would recommend you work with him, or find a teacher who you resonate better with.

@Red-White-Light Does it sound like he's describing a bad trip? Maybe psychotic is just a label we put on parts of our experience, and when we learn to detach from the label it improves well being.

@Red-White-Light How would you characterize a "psychotic episode" that does not have negatively effect the well being of the person suffering the incident, or the people in their life? How would you define that?

I found god on LSD recently. You called it haha.