Bridge to Infinity

Introduction: So Im a very needy guy. Ive been that way for as long as I can remember and I don't know how to live in an UNEEDY way. I usually can get a girl to feel attracted but slowly she starts to discover that im needy and gets very turned off and starts ghosting me or treating me as a friend (she just loses interest). I've heard @Leo Gura and many others in the pickup community talk about the value of NON NEEDY socialisation. My Problem: I have a problem with understanding how not being needy is possible. I don't see how I can go about not being needy because as I said ive never lived the detached bad boy life, rather ive always lived the attached clingy type life. Solution request: I would like for you to tell me how I can intrinsically change myself so that I am naturally detached. What does non needy behaviour manifest as? How can I really really change myself to become non needy? (Repetition I know)

@Nickyy mikael has got a lot of victim mentality. don't argue with him using his own frame, dress the fact that his arguments stem from a type of surrendering in the battle of getting better with women.

@Leo Gura how can I sleep with girls in the first place to get over my neediness if I am needy.

@Serotoninluv im seeking them, I want them to be with me, I want sex from them, I want to have a man to woman romance between us. I need that to make me feel content.

@Leo Gura what about neediness with friendships, just with guy friends. How does one go about evolving past that?

Day 4 My meditations are not clear, I have a lot of brainfog during them a lot of add, can't focus, very bad quality meditation. it is definitely helping though

Introduction: I've had the intention of meditating for 2 years now, and I would try it for a couple of days then stop and then go back again then stop, Its been this process of start and stop for the past 2 years but recently I was inspired by Actualized.org user @Raphael's meditation journal to do this. I have ADHD and fuck that! I saw a bunch of studies on how mindfulness meditation transformed the livelihoods of ADHD children for the better. Method: I will be Focusing on the breath and when ever I get distracted by a thought, emotion, memory, sensation, craving, pain, itch make a note of it and identify what it is.

I will post daily updates on how my abstinence is going.

Day 3 went well

its in the title

So im 18, I recently graduated high school I have a year until im in college. I spend most days alone since all my friends are in school still (I graduated a year earlier). The symptoms I am about to tell you about have happened only recently and have been accumulating for the past 2 months (when I moved out of my parents house) Some info about me that is relevant: I have some low self esteem issues. I am 15-20 pounds overweight Don't have a dating life Don't really know what I wanna do in life yet I always worry about what others think of me Symptoms: Sleepyness (sleeping uptown 14 hours somedays) Fatigue (No energy and lack of motivation) Lack of concentration (I cannot read a sentence of words without my mind drifting off) Lack of Drive Lack of sense of humour Feeling anxious Im starting to put 2 and 2 together and I think I have depression. What can I do? Edit for all those reading: This post was a bit unclear. I exercise, I have muscles, I don't have general feelings of sadness or self destructive thoughts. I am however am extremely fatigued and always sleepy and can't really have motivation cuz im feeling like I wanna sleep all the time. I think getting Modafinil or Ritalin for now is a good move.

@Shiva Steve Jobs was very alpha and he did more than what Bill Gates did IMO. Edison was very alpha and he did a whole lot. Einstein, very alpha. Richard Feynman. Its not black and white, I don't think being beta correlates with inventiveness indefinitely, sure you could make the claim that people that tend to be much more withdrawn are people that use their minds more, and that withdrawnness could be called beta. So sure on average people that are not loud, are withdrawn have a tendency to be more imaginative in their thinking and therefore inventive. It is IMO wrong to assume that being withdrawn and beta are one and the same thing. Fundamentally being beta is the playing into your fear and not having courage to confront your fears head on, this is different than withdrawnness, but it playing into your fear tends to manifest as withdrawnness. Being beta is being fearful, it is living with low self esteem.

Day 2 Summary: The day went by quite easily, no horniness, I spent the day outside and. Just a casual day I also got a workout in, ate healthy meals. Nothing special about today.

For the past couple of weeks ive been fatigued hardcore, ive had blood tests and nothing showed up. What do I mean by fatigued? I want to sleep 24/7 and not do anything. what can I do about this. I eat a very healthy diet. Very high in leafy greens, high in healthy fats like olive oil, avocado, meat fat(not so healthy), moderate amount of protein and a good enough amount of carbs from fruits. so my diet is 50%fat 20%carb 30%protein I exercise daily and drag myself through a workout. what could I possibly do to fix this issue of constantly wanting to sleep?

Day 1 I feel very fatigued. Im starting to consider the idea of having depression, Im not sad or lonely but I might be having some sort of depression I have no idea! in which case nofap can do wonders here. I kind of fucked it up yesterday but ill go again, I really wished I didn't fap though because I would have made it to days 7-8 and apparently then your reset and fully charged at that point.

@Raphael wow! that motivates me to go on persisting on this path of meditation!

Day 2 Time: 15 mins Summary: I was feeling very fatigued and was having an ego backlash so my meditation was me constantly getting lost in thought and the blur that was my mind would not still for the first 10 or so mins of the meditation. But after 10 or so mins I started to achieve a sense of clarity and focus, despite me getting lost in thought still at times. Unfortunately I was disrupted by my neighbours fucking it out so I stopped at 15 mins!

@ugreglo so.... what are you trying to say

Day 5 RELAPSE! I felt very very very fatigued today as well as very very horny, I was edging myself and next thing you know an explosive force was manifested. Back on NoFap.

@Raphael How has meditation changed your daily experience of life?

Powerful stuff! In your video "Balancing Theory vs Practice" you talk about how you can pursue one thing and be doing something that contradicts it completely. This is a perfect example of this: Being sociopathic is a very selfish, dishonest and ugly way to go about living life, but it must be done to create attraction and then that allows for deep intimate romance and love later on (the opposite of sociopathy).

Day 5 Just woke up from the night from day 4. not feeling anything strange or odd, just feeling calm and centred. I would always wake up feeling exhausted however on nofapp I feel fine waking up, its not enough to skip coffee though. I also remove apps like instagram and Facebook and download them when ever I have to use them, and if I am going to mindlessly use them I let my self go on there for 30-40 mins straight and afterwards get rid of them. I noticed that apps have a similar effect on the brain to Fapping, but in a much less intense way. This is the reason for me cutting those apps out. Update on day 5: I just watched this video because I wanted to see what If I got horny and yes:

@ADD fuck yeah.

I was talking to this girl, I was really into her, she stops replying and then unfollows me and blocks me on all other social media platforms. This isn't the first time this has happened and the girls in my school also think im disgusting and unfuckable as well as creepy. Im actually good looking though. This makes me feel like utter crap. what should I do? Im trying to get into pickup and date girls, but I always come off as creepy or un valuable

@Leo Gura Thanks Leo, wholesome advice. I so appreciate you helping people one person at a time, every answer or reply you post is like a nugget of gold.