BlessedLion

I think it's about developing yourself into a great person, then having the attraction skills to at least get your foot in the door. Really it's mostly just a few low hanging fruits for some guys. But even if they have developed themselves with great character but cannot escalate physically, hold eye contact, and just know some of the basics of female psychology then they will struggle with dating more than they need to. I feel like you aren't really appreciating how for many guys, if they don't take care of this head on, they remain celibate.

It's important to learn the basics, the problem is most of the material out there is garbage and not correct. It's always been a cat and mouse dynamic, and these factors have always been going on unconsciously. What "Game" and "attraction theory" are doing is bringing it to the conscious mind. consider; that just like birds have a mating sequence and ritual, so do humans, and it would benefit men to know those "mating dance steps" That said, men can and do absolutely abuse this dynamic just to get what they want, which is where something like sexual ethics would come in. But being dangerous in your attraction skills is much better than be a fumbling high school goofball who "might just get so lucky to have a date with Cindy Loo" Also this video reminds me of what you were saying about the dating market (although i slightly disagree, as independent as we might become we have not transcended needing feminine or masculine companionship and it's wise not to think you're above this):

Losing our connection to normal, daily socialization has really been the downfall of people. Especially the ones growing up without socializing, i can't imagine how unhealthy that is for one's mind. Interesting post, but what do you mean by this?

What are the best ways to have the clearest and sharpest mind possible? A few things i thought of Heavy metal detox Great and consistent sleep Focus deep work blocks , no distractions Excercise No caffeine, alcohol, porn, scrolling as it scatters the mind and nervous system Walks and nature time Solititude and staying away from Drama Healhty whole foods, brain foods Anything else?

If the whole thing on women wanting a guy uglier than them is true, then that means looksmaxxing and men obsessing over their looks is actually backfiring which i find low key hilarious.

The flakiness is annoying but i feel like that's nothing new, especially for women. I find the delicacy of the attraction process to be wildly annoying because the smallest mistep will sabotage the process, especially if you are talking about women who have a lot of options and attention. With an uglier woman there is more wiggle room for fucking ups. But then all again, all the more reason to culitvate mastery and have fun with it I guess.

That's true and it's important to acknowledge these very real factors. It's never been harder to date and mate. However, in my eyes, that makes learning attraction all the more important. Most of my female friends have pretty much fully opted out of casual sex or even dating, or have serious avoidant tendencies- beautiful young women, who haven't had intimacy in sometimes 1 year+. So it's like the Red Queen effect (if you are familiar with that) but you have to just keep up with the changing times and environment (or you don't get sex) and to me that means really understanding and implementing attraction skills. This month alone I exchanged sexual energy with 3 very beautiful women, women who get 2/3 approaches per day, one was a model. I don't share that to brag but to mention that had i not studied deeper levels of attraction theory , this might not have happened. Personally, i realized many low hanging fruits that i had while studying attraction (and going out into the feild) in the last 4 months, helped me fix those. It's definitely not as simple as "just go socialize more" But yeah if you just sit around theorizing it will get you nowhere i agree. Again, i don't see the problem here, it's making men develop past just being mysognistic losers that women have to put up with because they have no other choice. I see it as a welcomed challenge to better myself to a point that a woman chooses me not because she needs me like some 1950s desperate housewife, but because she chooses for me my qualities and development. It's a double edged sword though because these days you truly have be outstanding to get consistent success with women, and many men don't have the time energy and money to do that level of inner work.

That's what i usually see as well. Again, what woman wouldn't be stoked on dating Brad Pitt?

Fine. But because women are more attracted to internal qualities, i can't help but think Joe is less of a great option. If Joe spent a decade building his confidence, wealth, status and social skills, he might have been sleeping with women who are way hotter than Sarah, but since he didn't, Sarah is the best option he can get. If Sarah doesn't care about confidence, status, financial stability, social skills, charisma, then good for her, this works out then. But this just re-circles our conversation and I think it's clear which hill each of us wants to die on. Why do women obsess, compete, and do everything in their power to become more beautiful then? I think that any man who has put a ton of time and energy into building himself and his life is going to want a beautiful woman by his side, doesn't mean she also can't be a great match chemistry and internally too. Idk , i don't really mind dating strong women. It doesn't intimidate me, it's kinda hot actually, only if they have a big ego about it and use it to devalue my ideas and work, then it's no problem. If i can still share my life purpose work with her and she is interested, admiring, and curious that's all i care about. Let's crush life together! But yeah if she is like trying to out-compete me or one-up me or any of that masculine type energy then i am out. But i want to date a woman with a mission and purpose and her own mastery. I also do want her to admire my mind. I think if Brad Pitt wanted to date a 4, she would have no problem with that. But maybe i'm wrong. This idea of women wanting less attractive men than them is new to me. Interesting Fair enough, if that's true, I can see how i'd be projecting my bias onto that dynamic. Are you sure about that? Maybe it's not as cartoonish as Hot Trophy Wife gives sex, Rich Billionare gives money- but most relationships are some form of transaction and economics. Not saying Love isn't real or at play but it's certainly more conditional than most will admit and if the conditions of the promised transaction are violated, the love goes away. It really is like a form of business negotiation, just without the formal paperwork, but lots of informal unspoken agreements and terms. Of course, many. But i never fall into desperation , neediness, or putting up with low quality behavior just to prove that she is my beloved. There was a Brazilian woman i loved more than life itself, and she crossed a certain line, i ended up blocking her immediately and not opening that door again for years (which was a mistake re-opening anyway). I have no problem ending things with a woman who is acting out of line. To me, this is the grounds for a respectful and powerful relationship. I don't want her to be needy for me either, if she's not enjoying it any more, I would hope that she would be non-needy enough to leave me. I don't find pushing through or forcing a relationship that isn't working to be endearing in any way and I'd rather just be alone if that's that case. I will not tolerate certain things and whether she is my beloved or not, there is conditions on the love. I know that goes against modern unconditional love ideals but i don't care. Yeah, i mean if this comes down to leadership in the relationship then i'd agree. I have no problem with her being strong, but if she is stubborn and challenging me on everything then i don't want it. I need to be able to lead in a relationship. That's interesting and does make sense. I've just never heard any women talk about this before.

I think learning attraction theory can help guys really figure out some low hanging fruits, obvious stuff, and it does go pretty deep. I like studying it solely for it's own sake, i find it fascinating. If you get the right material it's definitely not a waste of time and can be pretty mind blowing.

Hahah no sweat, Emerald and I are going pretty deep into the nuances of this, my head hurts too. It's easy once you get it, but for many guys this is more difficult than rocket science. You are not appreciating how difficult attraction is for most guys. If it was as easy as you are saying, we wouldn't have a bunch of 25 year old virgins today.

This whole question really is nothing new, people have debated and theorized on this for hundreds of years. I think of it as a mixture, let's not be naive and act like genetics have no influence, but let's also not underestimate the power of practice, work ethic and conscious improvement. Tiger Woods would not have become Tiger Woods had his father never trained him relentlessly in golf from a young age. At the same time: There are many children who get trained relentlessly from a young age and do not become Tiger Woods. In short, don't limit yourself, you don't actually know what your ceiling is and what you are capable of in any domain. Further, working at it and trying to master it will always get you further than just throwing in the towel and believing you are fucked anyway.

I think most people have this idea of death as floating in infinite black space of nothingness. It's crazy when you realize we are already floating in an infinite space of nothingness, just hallucinating a reality there

One hour per day is more than enough at your age. Just stay consistent and cut out bad habits that are harming you. I think it's wise at your age to build wealth, social skills, dating skills, and have fun, allow yourself some space to fuck around a bit. I started at 24 and now at 33 my life is radically different. I went balls to wall though, but now my life is golden

Sure, you are somewhat limited by genetics, but it's far less than you think. Plenty of people have overcome their genetic limitations and crushed it in domains they were told they'd never excel at. The universe definitely rewards persistence in life, this is limiting belief for sure.

@Emerald Also, I think it's helpful to think of relationship formation as an equation. Here it is (at least for men) Scenario 1: Tom is a quality guy and sees Angel and thinks she is cute, he is past his player phase and is ready for a serious relationship (he is in a rare window where he is actually ready to exclusively commit to one woman), he goes up and starts talking to Angel to see what else is going on there, if they have chemistry, etc. Depending on how Angel is, her vibe, compatability, personality, etc, he will either keep dating her or (if he has high integrity) walk away knowing that there isn't a long term option there. If he has low integrity he might lead her on and sleep with her only to ghost once he got what he wanted, That's where Angels discernment and intuition needs to kick in. Scenario 2: Tom is a quality guy ready for a relationship, he sees Sarah, a below average looking woman. He gives her a friendly smile and continues his stroll through the park. Instead of seeing a man being physcially attracted as some toxic filter that women need to sort through, it's more like the gateway for anything to form.

Hmm, what you are saying is landing in a certain way. The beautiful woman is going to have more guys coming to her solely because she is beautiful, therefore making it harder for her to discern their intentions, honesty, and if they like her personality. But I still think people sort themselves quite rapidly and figure out and understand their general "window" of attraction, so then they adjust for that and it becomes relative, and an average woman will be a score for a less than average looking guy. He is still very much factoring in her physical looks, no guy or girl doesn't do this. I still think lower than average (uglier) women struggle to attract the types of men they want. We can't separate beauty from liking a woman or her personality. Even my female friends will say it's a factor for their attraction. If a guy has a 9 personality but is a 3 physically, they won't want to date him and will friend zone. We can't seperate these things, as idealistically as we'd like. Maybe some people can, but that's not the norm, and it's certainly not the norm for men. They also have less power in the relationship dynamic. This is undeniable. A very beautiful woman weilds much more power in a relationship than an ugly one. Because she has something that a lot of people value, this is just economics. Your peacock theory even proves it, people want to be the more attractive partner because there is an inherent power in that. The reason an average woman doesn't want to date a 10 physcially guy is because there is too large of a power imbalance there. If you remain more attractive than your partner then this gives you a certain power over them, especially for a woman because men value looks more than women do.

He was always sorta unhinged, and i don't really enjoy criticising other peoples work, but i keep up with him to see what he's up to. Some of his latest thumbnails: "The 13 heavens are real" "Jesus was half alien" "The Fake God Running Reality" Seems like he's really gone of the deep end of the psychedelic alien world. It should be a warning of epistemic irresponsibility, fantastical thinking, and misusing psychedelics. He is very stage purple and stage blue in a lot of his models and ideas. He used to be sorta grounded but now it's just totally wacky and has nothing to do with consciousness work.

Yeah i gotta admit Leo's work is another level of quality. It totally changed my life just because of the synthesis of different points of view and timeless principles he carries. Also, to this day, the book list just astonishes me, idk how he found and filtered through some of the best books on the planet on major topics but idk if i would have found those myself. Also, Leo introduced me to Ralston, who also is in a league of his own. Ralston taught me how to think, stop suffering, and attain mastery by dropping my ego and getting to the core of what works in any field or domain, not what i want to work or what i think should work. It gives me this ridiculous advantage over other people for whatever i want to pursue. Now i live life in a whole different lane than most people who struggle with survival, emotional and sexual needs i can pursue what interests me and not take the survival aspect of life so seriously, and actually kick ass in those too. I'm also grateful for my mentor Sahajanada , who taught me what the spiritual heart, and love aspect of God/Reality is. No matter how deep i go into game/attraction/evolutionary theory, or business world, or any feild. I am always aware of Love and God, which science and biology tries to reduce all of reality down to an equation or evolution, not making room for the mystical. I had another mentor in my early 20s, Justin, my therapist, who helped me through the most turbulent of emotional difficulties and introduced me to meditation and mindfulness, he didn't just plop me on a bunch of pills and shit. Dude saved my life in many times of crisis. Overall, I've been beyond gifted with the men who have shown up in my life as mentors and helped me navigate the confusing waters of life. And interestingly many of them share the same general conclusions about life and how to live. I try to be that mentor for others now, but i'm not nearly as big or recognized. I don't really care though , i do it for the spirit of the work, whether 100 or 100,000 listen to what i have to say. I used to think this forum was full of people whining and talking immature bullshit, but now I see people who are actually embodying and have integrated this work in their own unique way, which is inspiring to see. We are very lucky to have stumbled upon this work. Thanks Leo

I agree with you here. I think for men attraction skills are more important than sorting skills and for women it's vise versa. I have an unrelated question for you , as I am gathering research on this and asking my female friends. But how important are physical looks to women? Like if a guy is a 9 but he is awkward, cringe, unconfident, etc will he still have a chance? Versus a guy who is a 4 physically but is confident, fun, safe, intelligent. And how important is status to women? I agree with that. I also am curious why partners have similar physical attractiveness, because it goes agains sexual evolutionary theory, like if "men value youth/beauty and women value status/wealth" then wouldn't there be a bunch of 50 year old rich men walking around with 20 year old beautiful women? Yeah, but thats' Florida jk But seriously, again that's the relative best those guys can do. Attraction is relative, so in their eyes she is an absolute dime. They see her as the hot young 20 year old. Attraction is the initial context for anything else to form. If i spend enough years on a deserted island and Delores shows i'm up....I'm game haha. Fair enough, maybe we are just looking at different metrics, currently i am in a phase of studying sexual attraction, the sexual market place and dating dynamics so maybe it's different. Also, I was thinking about it, and I don't have the belief any of this has to do with a loving partnership. I think 2 "ugly" people are still able to love as fully and deeply as anyone else. This was more a discussion about attraction and the optionality/power that comes with that. And i still stand by my statement that more attractive women have a higher leverage in relationships and get to enjoy more variety in optionality, allowing them to find the best possible option for their goals and standards, whereas uglier woman might have to settle more or put up with worse behavior (if they want a relationship) - and that the reason for men approaching , from rich ceo to Old Joe and Bob, is because they want sex and find whoever they are approaching sexually attractive. That is all relative, so the reasons behind the approach and interest (at least the initial interest) doesn't change. Does the woman in the second video really have an advantage in the dating world to Giselle (first video)? Is she really going to get better options?

Crazy stuff, he's like functionally unhinged as fuck as i feel like he is surronded by yes men who just fuel his delusions. Also, i feel bad for his wife, like he's totally brainwashed her

Definitely. I have a YouTube channel where i've shared some of those insights, like writing i find speaking about and modeling these things to take the learning to a whole new level. Check it out if you'd like:

I've been synthesizing sexual evolutionary theory (Red Queen, Sperm Wars) / Dating Theory (Value of Others, Dating Essentials for Men) / and Male/Female psychology and difference (Male Brain , Female Brain, Different) and it's been such a beautiful synthesis. I am having an intellectual orgasm daily just from the synthesis and understanding that is happening! And that's just attraction. Next. year i'll be diving in Tantra and Relationships, going deeper into this dynamic in a sustained and heart centered way.

Just watch the first 5 minutes of this and try not to throw up

Attraction, Sexuality, Dating between the sexes. Been going super deep into this topic, solely for the sake of understanding it for it's own sake but also enjoying "the laboratory" as well Been mind blowing, and honestly essential