Yellow_Girl

I call it SAD . . . and I am profoundly influenced by it! But I live in a state where we have extreme weather fluctuations. HOT and FREEZING. Hardly ever in between. I want to move but our lives are rooted here and my needs are pretty low on the list. Kids school first, husbands job second. My business can operate anywhere.

I figured this out a long time ago. Time was invented so that not everything happens at once.

Ha ha. This discussion cracked me up! The answer is "it depends." Why generalize? Why put people into categories? Also, you can never answer this question because any answer would transform into a "belief" and no beliefs are correct, they are only future predictions of outcomes and can only be validated when the outcome comes to pass. But because outcomes are also subjective, they still cannot be evaluated objectively unless the outcome was binary or math-based. Keep working on personal development and historical learning and reading other points of view until you realize the above. Maybe take a humanities course at the school. Also, I really hate masculine and feminine teachings because they just slap words on people and call it a real description. It isn't. The answer is "it depends."

This is a wonderful gift! You are infinetly curious! Rather than worry about it, allow yourself to explore this crazy reality. I know many people who have three or four college degrees. They love learning THAT MUCH.

Coincidences can be easily explained with mathematics. Humans can take in three items of stimuli every second. This adds up to 1.8 million bits of stimuli per week. Given that number, it's highly probable that two unrelated stimuli will arrive in your awareness within that time span. But I personally think it's the matrix breaking down

This is an interesting read: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Denial_of_Death I think the awareness of death is very important for completing your immortality projects, which give life meaning. I'm personally not suicidal but am excited to find out what is or isn't after death. It's the greatest mystery of all. And how odd would it be if there was nothing.

I have an answer that is entirely theoretical, but it really makes sense when it comes to my situation and there are many psychologists who agree with this assessment. I'm not silly enough to think that this covers all depression, but certainly the "lack of motivation" style. Depression stems from a cause and effect mismatch. Or, "learned helplessness" (Google it if you haven't heard of it). Meaning, you do something because you think it will produce an outcome. When it fails to produce the outcome over and over again, it hurts you emotionally, which causes you to feel like laying low so you can heal. Nature gave this to you to keep you from accidentally killing yourself. If you put your hand on a hot stove, thinking the stove is not on, it burns. The only way to heal the hand is to stop using it for a few days. If you kept touching the stove, you'd die of an infection. In modern life we must fail ALL THE TIME to get what we want because we are in high competition with each other. After a string of painful failures, your protection mode gets activated and you crawl into your cave to heal. Your dopamine gets very low and you don't feel like doing anything. I have found only two cures for it and it seems to work for me much of the time. 1 - I do a fasting stint. Fasting opens your dopamine channels so you "seek out food" which gives you motivation. Of course the "need to seek" isn't just for food, it applies to anything you want. Just a 24-hour fast helps my depression quite a lot. 2 - The idea that "doing things does not require motivation, it CAUSES motivation." The simple act of setting a timer on your phone and saying "for two minutes, I will research that trip I want to go on" will break the inertia and cause you to have more motivation. Do enough strings of this, and you can do all the things you've wanted to do. I really hope some of this helped. It took me many painful years to figure this out.

#lifegoals

Lots and lots of poop. Think Shawshank Redemption.

Wow! I came back here and didn't expect to see so many replies. Thanks everyone, I need to go through and read and understand. I'm sorry if I was triggered on Monday. I should have known better. I'll not run away. In fact, I'll read and respond to this stuff during my next break!

Me! To my surprise, I lost interest in fiction & most movies and TV in my early 30's (now I'm 38). It was REALLY sad. It took me a really long time to unpack why. I think that much of pop culture is based upon people in a more purple/red/blue spiral and I had started to move into Orange. Self-help, motivation books, etc became my most loved type of read. I swear I read it all! But more recently, those have started to seem sort of childish to me. Now I'm more interested in crazy complex stuff. Like really hard to understand tombs on reality and systemic thinking, even mathematics and physics. It's just a part of growing up! But I must say I really miss fiction and I have a theory that it will come around again and I will be able to enjoy more of it in the future. It's like when your favorite stuffed bunny stops talking to you when you are 11 years old. It's so sad! But you know it doesn't "work" anymore and you have to put her in the closet. You'll visit her sometimes, but you no longer sleep together.

Thank you for all the replies so far. I'm going to go read Don Beck's book again. I believe I'm hitting a transformational dilemma. I am sad that we see the spiral as yet another way to form hierarchies and that expressing yellow is like telling someone you have a second home in the Hamptons. I have done a lot of work and these are conclusions I have come to, it is the way I see the world but I am looking for solutions to transcend this. I did feel attacked and ridiculed on this board where I came for a discussion on the topic of issues with certain belief structures. I will keep looking for a place to be understood, or at least find comfort in not being understood. Maybe this is impossible. Being human is hard. Bye.

hug

It's not a requirement of mine. It's just that when we evaluate situations, I get a lot of belief-mongering. I get a lot of "my beliefs are right" -- as yellow, I don't think beliefs can be "right", only "effective and ineffective". Once you see that, you start to realize that much of human interaction is just belief-mongering. Maybe none of you see this yet perhaps. No amount of hugging can make someone feel understood.

I am not trying to call myself yellow to tout that I am special or whatever. I just am yellow. I know this because it's literally the way I think! That's why I was so happy to find the spiral, because it was an EXACT description of how I think. I do get out there. I have many friends and family. It is not from lack of human connection this stems. I am surrounded by love on all sides. It is a lack of being understood. Unfortunately, people do group themselves based on belief. This has been extremely well documented. Ajastaya, I don't think you have the wisdom I am looking for. Does anyone else understand this or is this just me talking jibberish?