Human Animal

Oh, she's definitely something interesting. Thanks! Do you know any books on the topic?

So I'm a 20-year old guy who at first time in his life engages in an attempt to have a real long-term relationship. Previously I was a bit interesting in pickup and having "casual sex" and so on, but I started to find it boring and exhausting. So me, and a girl with which we were "just making good sex and having fun" slowly and carefully started thinking about something more real, intimate and personal. And now it's almost a year since we're together. We are +- emotionally stable and so on so we don't have a lot of fights and we're dialoguing our way through somehow. But it's felt and seen that we're really different people. We have influenced each other a lot through that year, but it's quite obvious that we also have different priorities and values sometimes, in the most vital areas of life. I'm self-absorbed in some sense and quite attached to this idea of personal growth, transformation, understanding life and so on. "WE ALL SHOULD REACH TO THE STARS", that kind of thinking. She buys into it to some degree but she's more(than me) about comfort, not-risking, and relationships with others. And this polarity often shows itself when we have an argument or a serious discussion on some matter. So with that explained I would like to ask you, dear self-actualizers, for any valuable and insightful books/authors/articles/youtubers on the topic of romantic relationships, partnership, sexuality, communication, reaching understanding with orthers, and so on. Specifically in my situation, but also in general, so any ideas will be valuable.

Wow Ukrainian moderator. Did you like Kiev?

As I have noticed many people who just start their personal development journey - do not really believe in their ability to climb out of their rut to something more beautifull and so on. I'm not even talking about self-actualization yet. People may feel themselves really helpless to a degree that they're not able to do the most foundational stuff like meditation or clerification of their values. Some of this people may watch your channel. I was in a situation like that some time ago. Just watched Actualized.org and Jordan Peterson, did a lot of shit and struggled to break this cycle of bad habbits, negative thinking, psychological problems and so on. Yeah, i have made an effort but even JUST watching this stuff and getting some ideas, bigger context is very helpfull. Different teachers influence differently on different people, and cover different aspects of personal development, spirituality, psychology, business and so on. And as far as I'm concerned sometimes people really just lack of information/influence from outside, and time. So I suppose it would be very usefull if you made an episode with a list of hight quality personal development/self-help/spirituality teachers with some in-depth like: for what people his/her teachings may be most usefull, what's his/her area of competence, with witch Spiral Dynamics stage it will resonate the most, and so on. For example - Leo Gura. Advanced guy who's most interested in holistic understanding of the universe, and psychology: the deepest laws, mechanics of how it works. Also makes a big accent on principle of mastery, and higher order values. I suppose, most resonates with stage yellow-thinking people who value understanding on different levels, and nuances. And resonates highly with with stage orange on his older videos.

Kharkiv, Ukraine