Bill W

Thanks for sharing your God beliefs. What I like about this place is that people are willing to share their beliefs and keep an open mind about what beliefs others may have that are different to their own belief. I guess that's one of the key ingredients in self actualisation? To keep and open mind?

Okay my response to this is based on where I am at with my experience and development, so here goes..... This is what I'd tell myself right now if the same happened and I reacted the same as you.... You took it personally and that's the main problem here. You might say "well of course I took it personally", and I used to think this all the time. I used to think taking things personally was something automatic, something I was entitled to do, something that makes perfect sense. I am slowly learning it doesn't have to be this way. There is a better way. I can't remember where I read this, perhaps from Don Miguel Ruiz who I have learned a lot from. I try to focus on...... that when someone behaves in a manner I don't like toward me, it could be that this person is giving me a demonstration of their sickness, their Hell, their problem mind. I'd rather they didn't give me this "update", but it happens. It could be family, strangers or anyone. Road rage is a good example. Most likely this person's behaviour is not personal to me. This person probably has these outbursts or unhelpful behaviour towards other people as well. I reflect that I used to "act out" as well and still do, but I am getting better with this. I think that perhaps this other person is not as far into his development as me. This other person doesn't have a programme perhaps. This person might be in Hell and he is displaying that his world is not good. You wanted to say something ugly to him? I know that feeling oh so well. For me, this means you/we feel wronged and that it's not fair what they did. How dare they!!!! Perhaps we think that if we retaliate then justice has been served. We have to question the need to administer justice. This is the tough bit.... you can choose to engage with the person on their level or you can walk away.... You can leave them in the dust. Sometimes in surrendering, we can have victory.

I hear you! I do. But if you ask someone to stop or change tact and they don't, you are then vulnerable as you have potentially already mentally started "rallying the troops" and drawn a line in the sand. This is not to say we need to be a door mat and just roll over passively. But if you can walk away, stay truly humble, you can begin to transcend the animal instinct. Leave the other person in the dust. Let the other person sort out the mess. It's not your mess. Go to battle and "win"? The victory will be short lived as sure as shit, the pattern will repeat. Some other provocation will appear. Not preaching honest but how about the serenity prayer here? God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.

Maybe we could consider we are all on the same team to a degree. All under the umbrella of self improvement but perhaps different denominations! I don't mean to specifically use religious language here but it kind of fits from where i sit. Also some of us are more prone to feeling violated or offended or spoken down to. Things we have been doing for years and years will not disappear over night. Some of us go after 'justice' more vigorously than others if we feel wronged, judged or misunderstood. I learnt than anger is one negative emotional state that we are likely to hold on to. There can be reluctance to let anger go in my experience. Most other negative emotional states we want to be free of ASAP I believe. Anger not so much. The David Hawkins book taught me a lot about this. I'm 44 years old and it's taken years and years to be less reactive and defensive with internet debates and such. To not take things personally. In surrendering you can have victory. To look the other way and let some shit go is a habit I feel that needs practice. It goes against instinct. On this forum I have no position to defend. I have nothing to fight for.

Could be true for some. No doubt. I suppose we can only speak for ourselves rather than speak for all. I cherish my mental health and yet this is the right place to be. It's what you make of it. You could argue that it is the right place to be if you value your mental health. Depends on the individual needs and vulnerabilities really.

I guess it depends on how you define meditation. Mindfulness is a form of meditation. If you mean sitting at the steering wheel driving with your eyes closed contemplating the meaning of life then yeh I see your point.

I don't know about the first paragraph. I am not disagreeing. I just don't know. 2nd and 3rd paragraphs I believe in. I guess we have been searching for this "truth" since the year dot. The likelihood that Leo Gura happens to have stumbled across it is unlikely. I can't completely rule it out though. I don't know if people are uncomfortable with the term belief. Does it somehow feel insulting to say Leo has beliefs and is sharing his beliefs? That he is asking us to believe what he believes. Of course he thinks his beliefs are more correct than incorrect. He wouldn't hold them otherwise. He is human. Most people who feel they are on to something or discovered something are enthusiastic to spread the word. To carry the message. If the belief is complex and not understood by others that doesn't transform it from a belief to the real truth. This is my stance right now. I'm comfortable with it. I am also here to keep an open mind. If Leo has done what millions of others have failed at, I am open to being convinced of his truth. Will the name Leo Gura be associated with a huge breakthrough in 10 years time. 100 years time. 1000 years time? Who knows. He could be the Neil Armstrong of the future for all I know.

Do you have any mental health issues you'd like to overcome? I have a shit load. Just wondered what you had in mind?

This

Love this post. Hit.Nail.On.Head there for me. To me, Leo is making suggestions. He is inviting people to share his beliefs. I don't think he gives a shit if we do or not. His wording might not seem like suggestions or invitations, but I believe it cannot be anything other than suggestions and invitations. One human out of over 7 billion humans on Earth. One persons view. One persons take. All be it, a highly clever fucker and seemingly has done a shit load of work to get where he is.

Yep, and this forum is a good training ground for that :-)

Not only is that really funny, I actually properly laughed, it's so true. I'm saving that and printing it, but not mostly for it's humour value, for it's actual true value, so thanks for this.

Can I first ask what a science truth is? It would help me work out if I have something to contribute here, cheers :-) And what do you mean by finger pointed?

Might matter to the other party like the pedestrian or other driver! :-) I actually try and meditate when driving. Radio and music off. Just focus on exactly what's in front of me. Present moment only. Helps conquer road rage as well. Well it does my end :-)

I appreciate you are just talking for yourself and not for everyone. I'm here for all those three C's. Actually I'd say I am mostly here for comfort and I have that comfort. My comfort levels didn't change when I kind of felt my first topic got blown out the water and I felt out my depth. Still felt comfortable as this is the internet. The forum won't impact on my comfort levels even if I don't quite fit in. So much wisdom on here. Just depends how you deal with stuff and how you take the rough with the smooth. It's all good man. It's all comfortable.

I break things down to either 10 or 20 or 30mins or even 5 mins if needed. What I mean is that I set an alarm on my phone and all I do for the allotted 10-30 mins is start the thing I am procrastinating on. Better still I try and do this 'task' or 'thing' mindfully. When it works it can mean not only have I started the task but I might even have managed to do mindfulness meditation at the same time. When the alarm goes off I am entitled to either stop the activity dead or carry on if I feel like it. Sometimes when I'm really bad on the procrastination I will set the alarm for just 5 mins. I keep a written record of how many minutes each day I have done something I would normally not do due to procrastination. It motivates me. I keep score. Even if I manage only 5 mins it could be considered a success some days. 5mins can lead to 30mins sometimes and 30mins can lead to half a day!

Yes thanks. I needed to hear that as well. Easy to forget.

Thanks for your post. Can I quickly butt in and ask you if there is anything specific that particularly draws you to Peter Ralston? I've not read any of his stuff or listened to him yet.

This is my first topic. I did a book review already but am not counting that really. This is the first time I've taken the plunge and worked up the courage to ask a question "in front of the class". I'm not expecting long answers from people. In the context of this ramble, how would you describe the possible benefits of nonduality philosophy to me Is it correct to call it a philosophy? I'm not looking for people to do my work for me. I'm not being lazy. I'm just stuck in my current level of understanding. I'm not sure if I should try and understand nonduality or just let that sleeping dog lie for now. I can't work out whether it's something I should have as a foundation (such as deciding if I buy into it or not), or whether it's something that I should consider later on. I really didn't want to ask this. I honestly have tried to read around and use the search function on here. I've read what Nahm has written (via his signature) but I do need to watch the video's in his link. However, from everything I've read online and listened to via YouTube I still can't ascertain what's the benefit to me of (a) understanding nonduality and then possibly (b) buying into it. I get like this with self-development. I can obsess a bit too much on things that might be small detail or not relevant to my needs. I fear if I don't try and understand something I am missing out somehow. Not sure if you need to know some basics about me, or whether it's irrelevant what my little plans and dreams are..... For the last few months I've been getting my feet wet with basic Buddhist teachings. I'm also finding parts of the Bible incredibly uplifting, and much more practical than I thought the Bible would be. I don't know what I think about God. I'm not sure who God is or how God works. I (think) I believe at the minimum there is some Higher Power relevant and active in my life. I feel like I am looked after and that I am supposed to follow a path. With the thoughts I am conscious of, my immediate and primary goal is to manage my general fear, insecurities, to be able to better handle uncertainty, to better manage resentments I hold against people, and to move away from my ego (as I understand my ego to be). To move away from animal instinct behaviour. I want to be cool, calm, and collected. Kind to others. Forget myself. Get outside my own head. My most cherished values at the moment seem to be around openmindedness and humility. If I can get these right I think other good stuff can manifest, such as compassion, forgiveness, gratitude and resilience. I have all these qualities to a degree, but I want more, and better still, I want these values to be better reflected in my behaviour.

I can kind of buy into numbers 6 and 10. Actually 10 is a good one. So at best I give this a usefulness rating of 20% But I respect your view. Your journey is different to mine.

I'm with Johnny Bravo on this one in terms of his seemingly pragmatic approach. I won't go so far as to say believing life is a dream is dangerous, because I don't know about that. I'm all for life being a dream if that's what you want to believe. If that helps you. I know if I ever call the Police, Paramedics or Fire Department I hope they don't start thinking life is a dream, well not until they have come to my rescue first at least. If I call 999 or 911 and they said "relax, life is but a dream", I'd be pretty pissed. I hope your not a Judge or a Lawyer.

Yep I'm trying not to run before I can walk as well.

Have you done mushrooms before? Are they what's included in the group called psychedelics? I don't know shit about that to be honest. I'm not criticising or preaching, but I don't see any of the advice here to include using these substances and three mod's have given an input. I don't know (maybe others can advise).... is it indicated to use these substances if you are in this mental black hole? Shaun has already informed us his mental state is not good and he has worries about what everything means etc. Could the mushrooms do any damage? I'm just putting it out there..... When someone says "I'm not in a good place" it rings alarm bells, especially in the context of the other posts Shaun has made. Or am I like a neurotic mother here? I have experience using substances but not these kind. EDIT: Okay, you said you will try them next month, that reassures me a bit that it's not an impulsive action!

It's a weird one, as I now am kind of inventing in my head "mind depression". I'm actually not taking the piss about your typo. It genuinely got me thinking!

Sorry to butt in but I've never heard the term "mind depression". Perhaps you just wrote that without it meaning anything specific. It just got me thinking about associating anxiety and depression with just the mind and not my whole being. Not sure if that makes any sense or that is what you meant as well.....