Bill W

Tips for Preventing Sexual Stagnation in Relationship? First tip would be talk to your partner and not a forum

Thank you. I have signed up.

Thanks for going to the trouble of doing this my friend. I've added myself.

It is something that would be a problem for a farmer who has a lot of land. Nightmare.

I love all those long posts about karma. So the material you quote is from the Isha foundation?

Good stuff my brother. I needed to hear that today

Good topic. Obviously a lot of stuff for you to work on. You've been very honest about how you've judged them. I think you've handled the responses on this thread well also. It's the easiest thing in the world to come onto this thread and say love and accept everyone and just be grateful etc. Much easier to type that than it is to consistently practice it, especially when family are concerned. It is the way to go though. I'm not disputing the essence of the advice given. Progress not perfection my friend. That's a saying we have in AA. The fact you've done a long post tells me you want help to handle this. Take care man, and work on it. David Hawkins Letting go stuff and a lot of the work of Don Miguel Ruiz helped me deal better with some of the same challenges you face here. And AA of course has helped me as what we learn in AA is that resentment is the number one offender and like said here, not everyone has a programme. But it can be tough dealing with our fellow humans at times my brother. Let's not lose sight of that. Even Jesus lost his rag in the temple and went code red on people. Even Jesus didn't stand there and think let me grateful for this, what's the lesson learned lol

I have discovered the formula for stagnating on your spiritual and self-actualising journey. Average day right now for me 6.0 to 6.5 hours sleep time (instead of going for 7.5 to 8.0 hrs which is very achievable as I'm not being bothered by insomnia right now) 0.5 hrs lying in bed after the morning alarm goes off doing nothing but thinking "better get up now". I know meditation & prayer work well for me, but obviously doing something that doesn't work well for me such as lying in bed is more important right now 0.5 hrs to 1.0 hrs working from home as soon as I get dressed in the morning, catching up on my to-do list and admin 0.0 hrs of prayer & meditation in the morning, sacrificing this in service of catching up with work. Same for gym work in the morning. Fasting until about 5pm, partly because I do like the mental clarity it can bring, but mostly because I've binged too much the evening before and am worried about weight gain Overeating between about 5pm and 9pm, telling myself tomorrow will be different 1.0 to 2.0 hrs working from home in the evening instead of relaxing, socialising, and nourishing my spirit and mind and/or exercising. 0.0 hrs of prayer & meditation in the evening because what's the point, I've had an unproductive day, so why try and be productive right at the end With liberal servings of the following throughout the day; blaming of others, procrastinating as if my life depended on it, not doing the right thing, trying to correct other people's bad habits and generally trying my damnedest to live life on my terms. What's that definition of insanity again? I feel like I have the key to a much better life but I am standing at the door unsure whether to unlock it. Paralysed by the fact that I have had the key for a while now. I am at the jumping off point (but not in a suicidal sense). I need to jump off. I can see the safety net there below me and friendly people waiting to greet me. I know I'll land safely, but I am still scared of the drop.

I can relate.

From 2.20 to 11.00 was full of shit.

The one where he goes on and on saying everything is shit. I've searched high and low.

Thanks guys

I don't spend much time at all with Leo's videos but right now I was trying to think of something worthy to post on this journal and I was stuck. I've had a very flat day mood wise. Everything feels a bit shit. Then I remembered that video of Leo's where he just goes through a list of things that are shit. This is shit and that is shit etc. It made me smile and laugh inside thinking of that, as that's how I feel today. Will try and find that video now actually

Powerful stuff. That guy is one advanced human being.

How much am I willing to sacrifice? I try to remind myself that every person I meet is a potential teacher. Man, this is hard to do when you've unintentionally programmed yourself with a shit load of character defects so lengthy it might take 2 life times to overcome them. Selfishness, greed, pride, and the list goes on and on. Today's lesson was a light bulb moment just about 30 minutes ago. Someone who I am heavily involved with right now that I have blamed a lot recently for my angst said something about "sacrifice". She was turned down for a job today she had waited 2 weeks on an answer for, and she's gutted. Devastated. She said to me "I'm going to have to make a big sacrifice to get the kind of job I want to get". She was talking about her level of preparation for the next interview. It made me realise something - I'm not making any real sacrifices in my personal development mission, for my growth, for my bad habits and addictions, to sort out my character defects. No significant sacrifices are being made. Yes, I'm a year clean of alcohol and pills but it's not a sacrifice anymore. I have no obsession or desire for those substances. Nothing is being sacrificed to maintain my sobriety. I don't care for drink or drugs and I don't miss them anymore. I'm sacrificing fuck all basically. I'm trying to have my cake and eat it. Eating what I like. Treating people how I like. Not taking my exercise as serious as I used to. Withdrawing from things I need to face up to. Treating my finances and debt situation like money will never run out and why should I make cut backs. For me anyway, growth and sacrifice need to go hand in hand. It's just hit me today, I'm not willing to give up anything right now. All my bad habits and dysfunction. I'm holding onto them for dear fucking life! This is not be being too hard on myself. I don't hate myself or have self-loathing. I just need to face the facts. I think this post is a good unintentional follow up to my post above about Faith

Hang in there man. You've been real supportive of me so would like to be here for you. You are winning on authenticity right now for sure! This thread has turned into a confessional. I've had plenty of "oh wait, maybe I'm just the worlds biggest asshole" moments lately.

I just believe it's easier on the stomach this way. Especially with red meat which I would not have more than once per week. It also encourages you (or me for sure) to be more creative with my meals if I am going meat free 4 days of the week.

Faith In the post above I made some reference to Faith. Over the past year, with the help of Alcoholics Anonymous I've learned that my fear is behind virtually all of my problems, possibly even every single problem that has ever existed for me. So I'd begun to think that fear is the default setting for me and everything else flows from that. However, what if my fear is born out of a lack of Faith? Not necessarily Faith from a wholly religious perspective. Some of the common definitions of Faith seem to include Confidence or trust in a person, thing, or concept Complete trust or confidence in someone or something Firm belief even in the absence of proof Faith is choosing to believe The Bible says Hebrews 11:1 New Living Translation (NLT) - Faith shows the reality of what we hope for; it is the evidence of things we cannot see. Hebrews 11:6 New Living Translation (NLT) - And it is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him. The relationship between Faith & Fear (And therefore the relationship between Faith & Emotional Sobriety......) I'm going to lean on what the Susan Jeffers book "Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway" talks about. That our main fear is not the individual scenario's we dream up in our head, but, that if such things happen, we would not be able to cope after. Basically, that we cannot handle it Examples of where a lack of Faith is hindering me I do not have sufficient Faith that I will be any better off If I truly forgive certain people whom I hold deep resentments against. I do not have sufficient Faith in the idea that punishment of others is useless to me and that it in fact worsens my emotional sobriety. I used to think I did have Faith in the power of forgiveness, but if I had Faith in it, why have I not acted on it? It's like I have been telling myself I have Faith in forgiveness but I've just been a bit too nervous and/or stubborn to carry out the act of forgiveness. Why nervous and/or stubborn? Surely it is a lack of Faith in the outcome? But Alcoholics Anonymous tells you there can only be one outcome, and that outcome is a strengthening of your spirit and all round sobriety. That it is inevitable and a forgone conclusion that you will personally benefit from forgiving others, and that the benefit can be huge, substantial, and significant. It can even be life changing. The Bible says the same. My first reaction to my own sentence I've just typed is "Yes, I believe that to be so", but do I believe? If we believe something is the best course of action and we can easily take that action, why don't we? Where does the resistance get it's power from? The resistance must be drawing on some power as it can stop you acting in a way that serves both your interests and the interests of others. Everybody wins right? No, because resistance creeps in and stops anyone from winning. Everyone loses. Is long as the other person loses, we still feel like we've won, even though we have lost as well. Not forgiving someone is like keeping them on 0/10 and you on 1/10, rather than forgiving them and both of you being on 10/10 - We would rather be on 1/10 than allow them any points at all????? Crazy. More examples to follow, and some brainstorming on potential solutions to a lack of Faith to follow......

I don't believe any affects are negative overall, but meditation appears to raise uncomfortable thoughts and/or feelings for some. However, these difficulties need to be addressed anyway in my opinion. I don't believe in blaming meditation for this. It's just bringing up what is there, like an invitation to work on your self. Often you need to go back 1 step to move 2 steps forward.

It's definitely good. Have you not heard that there are too many people on Earth?

So basically it would make sense that the gay population increased as it would help the overpopulation of the Earth.

3 Times

I don't think your meditation is working Don.

I wish there were two Leo's. His recent video's do nothing for me, so every now and then I go for a rummage around in his older self-help video's. In my fantasy land, all of Leo's video's would be 5-30 minutes long as well, but I accept I'm in the minority on that one. And I have watched entire 90 minute and 120+ minute video's of Leo's and other teachers. I've yet to encounter a 60 minute plus video that offers any additional benefit once it passes the 30 minute mark. I'm staying off topic a bit with the above.