Useless folk

Hi all, I have recklessly took a large amoumt of armodafinil pills and got addicted to it Don't be as stupid as me. I am working with my personal doctor to fix it.

@Consilience you seem to be desperate for knowing how to seduce woman Please, never trip on Salvia. You may have sex with woman with the seductive power Salvia has. It fucked my life up!!!!

@Justine You and I both got fucked up by trips. I had sex with my girlfriend's sister just a week ago when I tripped on Salvia I think we should stay away from these substances. They are not for everyone. We might be the unlucky not suitable for them

I was fully awake when these lights showed up

Hi all, I've been meditating for 3 years and recently I often have had weird dreams like getting a needle stabbed in my penis when having sex. Moreover I sometimes hallucinated a lot of colorful lights. Any explanation?

Hi guys, because psychedelics are strictly banned in my country and i got a sense that armodafilnil could to some degree be a substitute for psychedelics after using it for a year. I did not trust my intuition at first but finally decided to test my theory. I took 32 armodafilnil pills at once and the effect happened 30 minutes later. I have become conscious that i have never been born. The present moment is the first moment i was born. Then, I cognized my entire body was mentally constructed but i stopped because it brought uncomfortable feeling The last thing i have become clearly conscious that life is a dream but again my logical mind rejected it

I asked my doctor before i took 32 pills. I did not do it recklessly. I already learned the lesson when I mixed armodafilnil with cigarette. I'm sorry for making you guys think I promote some stupid stunt stuff

@Leo Gura I did it after i asked a doctor. Armodafilnil + cigarrette did harm me in the last post. After that event i always asked my doctor before taking armodafilniI did not do it recklessly. My doctor examined my health and reasurrure 32 pills would not do any big harm. Moreover, I did a lot of research myself. Prior to 32 pills I took 16 pills many times to work my way up. I did not jump from 1 pill to 32 pills I once took tens of armodafilnil for 2 days consecutively and there was no serious problem. My doctor allowed me to @inFlow it's not true. 16+ armodafilnil pills can last for 2 days if you don't eat anything. Less than 10 pills would wear off in 10 hours

I don't know if i am too sensitive but today after i took 1 armodafilnil pill and an hour later i smoked 1 cigarette. I VOW: Just one. But I got an extremely devastating pain inside the forhead ( The upper part of the nose locating between the eyes). I'm not sure if it's called the frontal lobe in English. It was unexpected. I am not a cigarette addict. I have just smoked for a month. But I never have any problems smoking 1 cigarette It makes me wonder if nicotine ( or some other substance) in cigarette plus armodafilnil can damage brain. The pain is still lingering now but I'm ok. I understand that self actualization means you will have to do your own research but please, empathize with me guys. I'm from a third world country. I'm just a poor man busy working in a convenient store for 15 hours everyday. Right now I have no knowledge of chemistry. Might try to learn in the future. I vow that i am not a type of man that likes creating excuses.

I have posted this in the health and fitness forum but the pain seems to have gotten worse. I even feel uncomfortable with my eyes now. It feels like i want to take my eyes out. My fingers are becoming slower. So i posted here. Please help. Any advice? I don't know if i am too sensitive but today after i took 1 armodafilnil pill and an hour later i smoked 1 cigarette. I VOW: Just one. But I got an extremely devastating pain inside the forhead ( The upper part of the nose locating between the eyes). I'm not sure if it's called the frontal lobe in English. It was unexpected. I am not a cigarette addict. I have just smoked for a month. But I never have any problems smoking 1 cigarette It makes me wonder if nicotine ( or some other substance) in cigarette plus armodafilnil can damage brain. The pain is still lingering now but I'm ok. I understand that self actualization means you will have to do your own research but please, empathize with me guys. I'm from a third world country. I am just a poor man working for 15 hours everyday in a convenient store. I currently have no chemistry knowledge. Might try to learn in the future. I vow i am not the kind of man that likes creating excuses

@RillesI am summoning all strength left to write this. I think i am in danger now. The pain has changed its characteristics. It's not like someone is hitting me in the forehead anymore but it makes my brain and body lose nearly all the physical strength because the effect seems to have permeated my entire brain. I feel like i can faint any moment. My arms and legs lost all strength. All the neurons in my brain seem to have been torn apart. I am suffocating now. No words can define this state. I will go to sleep

i am still living in this monastery. I must say people here are extremely superstitious and living a primitive style. I have tried to forbade myself from judging others but judgement just comes on its own. Pp here think by reading lectures their disease would be killed without treatment. They even try to drag me into their stupidity. They are trying to get me to drink the water they call "Yellow paper water". They believe drinking such water a lot of Buddhas will watch over them. They see Buddhas as super physical beings who still exist and play a role in their life not realizing Buddhahood is real, Buddha is just a pointer. As for the man who wanted to commit suicide, i am surprised to know he's a somewhat harcore meditator. The more I know him the more I am starting to know what's in his mind. He's an intelligent meditator but has wasted his time choosing the wrong path (I'm really worried for him). A thought has popped up in my mind: We must become financially independent first before we put our effort for enlightement work. If we are poor and enlightened it would be suicidal because when you're enlightened you are likely to just do nothing. Your survival depends on others 2) You can become enlightened and yet remain immature. 3) Good people are more than usual ( I would say 99% ) are good just because they have some kind of ideaology or some sort of moral code has been implanted into their mind since they were children or because they are good because deep down they know that's the only way for them to survive. Most people here choose to live in this monastery because they are unable to make money living outside playing the monetary games humans invented. 4) Truly spiritual people wouldn't want to follow the herd lol. I've realized it just by observing the above-mentioned man. He just flows with existence without caring much about the stances others conform to when we all pray together. 5) Enlightened people are not accepted by the masses ( this could be just my assumption) . I notice it in that man. The man just keeps getting reminded by others to follow what the rest does even though he doesn't really care or get annoyed by any criticism.

Hi everyone i'm new. I am temporarily in the Buddhism monastery. It's like It was founded by a rich master. I come here to have a few insights about them. They are like a family monastery. People here are good human beings. There's no question about it. But they live a quite primitive lifestyle. For ex: spitting around ( including the master) . I can't blame them though because my country does not ban this act. I am from Vietnam. But I still have disdain for such acts. Their toilet and washing rooms are dirty and stingy but they don't allow me to wear shoes in those rooms. The shower in the male washing room is out of order so i can't wash my hair. A joint washing room that i almost could not find space to put my clothes. People are a little bit irresponsible in this case. They should have put their clothes in the washing machine when they are out. It's a little bit annoying. I feel like people here don't have any sense of hygienic standard at all. And they have me live in a room that only has a sleeping mat without a bed. The first day i could not sleep and almost wanted to leave but decided to carry on. My back still is not used to it yet . Interestingly I met a man whose left arm is severely wounded. His right hand is a bit wounded too. Later i founded his legs are wounded too. It became suspicious to me from the beginning that he did it himself. Since our ages are the same we talked and got along quite well. I asked him directly about his wounds and he admitted he did it himself in order to bleed to death. I asked him why and he said he's too tired of life and does not at all want to be part of the chain others have founded. He feels like he's a redundant person and not creating anything new for the world. I kinda understood what he meant. This man kinda wants to be an inventor or scientist who discovers something new but he's just not good enough. He tells me more about his personal life and my projection was confirmed. He's a kind and quite articulate man. I wanted to tell him that only 1 in a million can become a scientist or inventor or discover sth new. The rest just focuses on joining the already created working chain to make a living but decided to keep my mouth shut. His family has him in this monastery hoping he can decide his life ( continuing to live outside or become a Buddist). Honestly I think it's difficult for a man with his character to work as an employee in a company. He's not good salesman i am sure. If anyone tells me they want to commit suicide i will think they are weak souls but about this man i cannot. He's actually brave to cause such injuries for himself. Even his friend ( a martial artist said he would not have guts to). A few questions come to my mind: Should we have enough compassion to help someone die peacefully when they actually no longer want to live because for such people living longer just makes them suffer more. You have to be sentitive enough to see the suffering inside the man i met. He definitely tried but chose the wrong path to follow and he's just not good enough. About the monastery: It helps! Even after some uncomfortable things i still feel it helps. I am a bit fatter. I feel more energetic. People here are kindhearted but dogmatic. I will live here until April 22th or 23rd.

@Rilles yeah. It's not a bad thing anyway. I've decided to extend my time here. I will stay here for at least 26 days in total