integral

@Natasha Tori Maru this is hilarious

GUYS i speak differently depending on who im talking to. self-development is highly addictive, there should be so much addiction going on here that it doesn't even occur to them to be addicted to vape. The beginning stages of self development are some of the funnest times to be alive. Im speaking to an equal not a grandma im helping cross the street.

Its possible he needs compassion your right. I was speaking from how i operate and that one has to visualize who they are and who there identity is. Visualize: "i will do anything i set my mind to", "i am a genius with infinite potential", "i will save the world". Then visualize yourself doing all does things in detail, visualize your success, visualize social recognition, visualize all your dreams, even visualize yourself flying throw the air like a super hero, running at the speed of light and catching bullets with your bare hands. Then go to the gym, feel the blood pumping through your veins, Feel the vitality and joy of being alive.

I not speaking to a normal human, this is @LordFall 😂.

I didnt consider vape a serious addiction. I wouldnt of written it like that if this as more serious situation. Quitting Vape should be effortless for someone who serious about self development. The motivation has to come intrinsically through a rock solid inner vision of your own self-identity. "i am far beyond this", "i will never seek love from cigaret companies, fuck them" From MBTI this comes for Fi function = internal feeling function. The idea that a cigaret company is going to control you body and life should disgust you. This framing is only one part of it but it gets the point across.

I didn't consider this thats a great point, I couldn't understand why there was so much need for positivity and reshaping/framing everything to match a positive View. I think possibly it has to do with not being able to motivate oneself intrinsically and to work everyday towards ones goals just based on their Vision alone. So being unsatisfied where they are in life and having no tools to be consistent every day, they then start framing the entire world from a positive View and become hypersensitized to any realistic viewpoint. A realistic view of reality looks like negativity(or victim hood) from the lens of someone who needs their motivation to come from a positive framing. Oh my godddddd do all of your insights come with hearts and sunglasses now? what a blessing

I'm going to give some tough love here How could you allow yourself to vape to begin with? People deep into self development, it never occurs to them to even consider vaping or becoming regular user of marijuana. They're coping mechanisms involve sleeping at 8:30pm, going to the gym for an hour and a half, working on their life purpose as a distraction, these are the unhealthy coping mechanisms of the self-development Junkie 😂

There was a funny video they made where she said she would only date someone if they could beat her at chess, so you got to get those skills up You can probably get her right now just be somewhere she is. The hard part is being in proximity to these celebrities. The celebrity you're probably going to wife up is the one related to your future networked Social Circles. But I didn't know you were into ESFPs lol

It's true that a lot of them are coping The problem with the question of asking them if they want a 10 or not is that it's a general question that everyone wants. Obviously I would want to bang a 10 why not? But we're talking about a larger worldview and way of life here where just because I want something doesn't mean I'm going to organize my whole life around getting this thing, It takes a whole other level of caring about this and becoming obsessed and passionate about it to actually pursue it like it's that meaningful. People don't find this that meaningful in general. To be deluded to think having a 10 and wanting a 10/10 relationship is all that meaningful. Most people really don't care that much, if they really care then they're already doing pick up. Most of the people that want the 10 are also in the same group of people that want the Ferrari and all these things that they can't have it and they have resentment and jealousy, so they cope hard. When people get their self-esteems needs Met they don't really care that much about any of this. But that doesn't mean that they can't benefit from Reading 20 books in relationships, doing pick up or a learning networking skills, that's another topic. When you say value what do you mean? Value to society? Who are they valuable to? Besides the Elon Musk that are Reinventing the transportation system, the average person has some bullshit business convincing people to buy things they shouldn't ( like Vape), built some bullshit Network, jacking off some more bullshit people. A circle jerk of rich people, they go on vacation as often as possible. They read only books on how not to lose all their money. And so on. Bankrupt values. A person with unexamined values is of no value from a systems level perspective. They are all a leech to society. Are they going to reinvest that into the greater good? No never. The vast majority of people building any welt only benefit themselves and their immediate family. And when they accumulate enough wealth they spend it corrupting larger systems at every opportunity. I assume that would be read in the most judgmental way possible. My uncle's side of the family built highly successful clothing brands, Vape brands and so on. I don't see the value they contributed to anything. And none of them have ever done self-development. And I'm not above this, I built a sports betting platform, by Commission and im getting a percentage from all bets on the platform. But I'm not delusional here thinking that I'm done anything of high value. ( the platform is not released yet, issues with the lawyers) I noticed your work and I was wondering why you're not posting daily self development content while building a brand around a life coaching business? I figured that would be the main focus where you're Building yourself brand?

It's correct to point out people coping mechanisms, most people are in that situation. It's another thing when there's no alternative to maximizing some aspect of life or that their values are not accepted and are framed as limitations. if someone says they don't want to date a 10 because they don't care, there's two branching paths. There saying it from Below and that it's a coping mechanism and a victim mindset in disguise. They're saying it from above or representing actual values, that they genuinely don't care If someone were to date 20 super hotties and at the end of it he says that he really only values certain things in relationship and their looks don't mean much to me anymore. It's clear in that situation that they're not coping. A person can come to the same realization without dating all of these hot girls, but they're probably going to lack in the skills of pickup and potentially social confidence, social networking skills and so on. I think to avoid this kind of confusion finding a way to pinpoint the true phenomenology behind what they're saying is important. It's not always black and white that they're simply coping. Their values can be true and at the same time they lack other self-development skills, they can even lack self-confidence and self-esteem and yet still they don't value dating the supermodel, and they never will, it just doesn't mean that much. It's not a orange shadow, they genuinely don't care.

It seems the core of the issue is your framing all the proper development points for all situations and im pointing to the nuance that its not perfect, we have different values and vision and that gets confused with "limitations". yes im speaking in generalization because theres nothing specific to latch onto. I strive for all of these things, I put alot of work leveling up my relaitonship capacity from experience but its never going to be perfect in practice, showing up like a super star only goes so far and most of the battle is done in selection. My ambitions are on creating effecting change in root system of society and building cool stuff in general. i dont want to put more work into relationships then i already have, I dont care enough about this topic to go out of my way to get an extra 60% gain with a better partner, the difference between what i have and what i will get is not that big. Im satisfied with wtv my current gf is. She provides the core human needs i require (like eating or sleeping), now i work on what i actually am passionate about.

Its as if growth is not always possible for the other people in our lives. Causing concessions we have to work around.

@LordFall I'll believe it when you get those results. Alot of woman in that dynamic will be jelouse and they cant be "educated" out of feeling it as that book implies. Im sure it will help. The core problem in this conversation is everything has to be perfect, and you're debating Perfection as the only standard, and everything else is failure, mediocre, "wrong" There is some truth to it, because most people in relationships dont apply themselves as they were not thought there is a higher level to relationships, so they get mediocre results. At the same time, after doing all that, compromise is still necessary. <- the actual point im trying to make.

@LordFall The overall vision of self-development is correct. We're not debating on that. Every time I point to a real-world constraint, you flip it as "develop 90% more." there's no outcome I could say that your frame would count as an actual limit rather than a personal failure to develop hard enough. A frame that turns every constraint into "you didn't level up enough" can't be wrong If your frame can never be wrong, then you're not describing reality, it's good for motivation, but we're just talking about reality right now. Useful for life coaching, useless for understanding life. Fully develop yourself, Max everything out. After all of it, life still involves compromise. Not because your under-developed but because that's what it means to operate in a real world

I'm pointing to what results look like in the real world not in an ideal bubble. - Ideal bubble: Romantic relationships, businesses family relationships, social relationships, greater impact on the world - The real world: you develop a severe chronic health problem that prevents you from doing any of that. And now you have to Define a model of the real world involving self-development. The results a person is getting does not mean they don't understand self-development, this is the wrong epistemology. What your pointy to is High orange values fully actualized in the world, that's not self development, that's idealism.