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Everything posted by integral
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People dont end it before they cheat because other areas of the relationship are great like the husbands financial commitments. If a woman is not feeling loved she will cheat but shame her self because "he does so much for me and cares". If one person in the relationship grows up and the other doesn't they will drift apart and cheating can happen because one party is feeling stuck financially and not satisfied. So they are in a way forced to cheat and find another partner first then break up to secure financial safety.
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Daily loving hugs, telling her how much you love her, joking around during hugs or during the day, appreciate the things she does. Focus on how she feels the experience your giving her, getting her excited and intimate during the day before sex. My current gf is 38 never had an orgasm before me. Now she has multiple and predictably when ever I decide to "do the thing" that triggers it for her. The process of making this happen was to help her self-discover, encourage her to masturbate and to teach her lovingly what to focus on during intimacy, having lots of conversations about intimacy. Making her have orgasm happens on its own by just having sex until she is comfortable having sex. Its not something you can force or "DO" directly. Socialize after sex in a positive way about her experience and what she liked and didnt like and explore new things every time. New ways to use your mouth, different angles with the penis, better eye contact or body language, positions. Eventually she will become more comfortable and you will learn her body and figure out here "spots" or the way she enjoys it best. Then comfort, trust and orgasm will happen for her on its own, its a building process of her learning gradually over time. Make the intimacy funny as well, make jokes, tickle have fun, its ok to make her burst out laughing, that's how you build comfort, sex and intimacy is not serious!
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The holly grail of strategy games, emergent design! AI will allow for emergent art design, models, animations, sound... games where the art, animation, sound, interaction space is close to infinity!
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@Tyler Robinson Exercise is more effective then any form of therapy.
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@Leo Gura have you tried caprylic acid supplements for Sibo?
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The addiction you get when you look onto her body, girlfriend or wtv, that amazing figure and features are all strong attachment mechanisms to trick your mind into over valuing her and to make you attached to a neurotic degree. The prettier the girl, the more neurotic your attachment to her will be. Its a lot easier to have healthy relationships with women who are not as physically attractive because your going to be more secure, less competitive with the world around you and less bombarded by the mesmerizing effects a woman's figure and face has on your primitive animal brain.
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I don't believe therapy helps people really, you need to become your own internal psychologist, therapist, guru. But if it works for some people thats great the problem is they are likely going to be less conscious then you so its a pain in the ass talking to someone who is not at your level.
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Conservative therapist, avoid. Its not your fault try again next week with a different one, make sure to carefully read reviews. Maybe we can figure out what is the best approach to engage with a therapist to get the most out of it. Is talking about our problems and feelings therapy? Not sure ?
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Share your experiences!
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Feel better after talking about how you feel?
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Do you have any experience doing this? ?
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??? perfect line in a romance novel right before hugging the girl ?
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Ye he needs to vent but i disagree in that its a universal reaction all people will have, i would not react this way unless i had a unhealthy attachment to the girl and so exactly why he is reacting this way is important. Also this negative emotion will trigger behavior change where he is more fearful of future events.
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That's true another component is the intentions behind the anger. Most of the time its a type of jealousy and defensiveness, but not actually a empathy for the girls stress and desire to help the girl. His anger might be coming from his own inner insecurities, dependence and need to covet "what is mine" and so "fuck that guy, dont touch MY girl". This is why I'm saying its a unhealthy attachment and ownership mindset. Ownership mindset doesn't have to be a red framing, it subtle and the majority of people have it. So the anger is not coming to support the best interest of his girl, its to support his own agenda and this is why the majority of men dont help there girl in these kind of situations and only make things worse. Women then learn "not to tell guys the truth" to avoid this ape shit behavior, because these men cant handle the truth. @Lyubov What is the inner cause of the anger?
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@universe "Real growth is an emotional release that you don't even think about it anymore" that's true, but i think there is something primitive about attraction that is hard wired and makes men stupid. A woman that is overly attractive effects the mind in a unhealthy way, its stress and a mental burden.
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Sure but if you turn this experience into a habit of nagging and precautions it will ruin the relationship. Its better to let it go. Your trauma is effecting this relationship, what will you do if something worse happens? Your attached in a unhealthy way.
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Every guy wants to grap your girls ass, it is inevitable that some will act on it. Try to think realistically and probabilistically instead of idealistically (how things should be). The plus side is she is now less trusting of other people and more attached to you as a result.
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Anxious avoidant attachment style or Independent attachment style?
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@evgn That does not sound like good friends. Do you have any childhood trauma?
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Are you smoking weed?
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After they honey moon phase ends the primary fantasy (looks, money, social status) is no longer important and what matters is the secondary fantasy. Primary Fantasy: Men are conditioned to be physically attracted to young (or at least, younger), vital, and healthy-looking females with smooth skin, shiny hair, well aligned complete white teeth, symmetric facial and body features, wide hips, small waists (ideally with an 0.7 hip-to-waist ratio),65 sparkling eyes, and full breasts, which are all indicators for fertility and the ability to bear healthy children.66 Secondary Fantasy: Shared values, interests, lifestyle choices, temperaments, plans and dreams for the future, and compatible needs around time spent together, money, and sex. Did you guys have good compatibility as friends?
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Hold phone up high to mouth level and say "Siri what's a good x-mas present for a girlfriend?", do this in front of her. She will talk to you. Ask her for tips, include her in the quest.
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@Hardkill Sorry for the negative feed back, its true we made to many assumptions. I really think its easier in school from my experience. Your in a situation where your put together in the same room to chat for months, cant get easier then that. Are you sure your coming off as a guy girls love to talk to and connect with?
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Then your self assessment is off and your not resonating with the person your talking to as well as you think. Or the girls your dating are not at your level and emotionally not available for relationships.