integral

Develop charisma, thats 99% of the battle.

Read this comment 3 times and laughed each time. Simple but effective

Replace the time spent on the phone doing something else. Go to the gym, work on a hobbies, go biking outside, only socialize on a hard computer. Please dont bring a phone outside... One of the best meta-moves i was lucky to make in life was to never buy a phone.

It depends if they are considerate of others or not, most people dont like jocks, everyone likes someone they feel welcome with. When i got my first girl friend at 21 i realized people are actually attracted to me. Its hard to understand from a males perspective what makes men attractive, we dont see it, but we know what makes women attractive, we see it. So some men can be completely clueless about how attractive they are even when they are told constantly by their mothers When you dont care about looks and people constantly talk about how you look it can be frustrating. He rater focus on something interesting. Everyone can be intimidated by people and nervous around women they like, it goes deeper then looks. He doesnt know how hes making women feel. All hes experiencing is that they tense up and dont talk to him, he doest know its because hes good looking and hes putting pressure on them. He needs to learn to identify it and help make the person feel comfortable. It will require opening up more. Also shyness is working against him in this situation, the women are experiencing him as serious, unapproachable and hard to talk to, not shy. People just have no idea whats going on from other peoples perspective during an interaction, especially at age 15. All they see is there own point of view. She likely stopped talking to him because she thinks hes unfriendly. I was told my first impressions people have of me is that im an asshole (when young). They would tell me after they got to know me and realized it was shyness.

Zoom out, view hitler for how he became hitler. The journey. The same seed as you planted somewhere else.

Always ask them to meet up ASAP, no waiting around chatting, the reason they stopped responding is because they found someone else on the site, who probably she meet in real life, you where to slow. Nearly on the first or second day, explain that you want to meet up to see if we connected.

@Striving for more Its all early years relationship stuff and orange. If the partner has a good connection and intimacy in a relationship all the needs are met and there is no cheating to worry about. Not sure the perspective of why someone would talk about there bf whit a guy then cheat on them with the same guy, its like they want you to convince them that they would be better off with you. There relationships had issues that's the only way this would happen. Its always obvious if a partner is going to cheat, the signs can be seen way before it happens. Good relationships your both friends and enjoy spending quality time with each other, so they would never cheat on you and why would a partner want to hurt someone they love? It depends on the stage in life they are in, later in life. Early years monogamy might make little sense for some, it depends. Like dating an charismatic naturally flirty ESFP 18 year old hot blond with blue eyes, good luck with that roller-coaster haha, she was not built for monogamy, they are built to love multiple people at the same time. If you want loyalty date a ISFJ or INFP. INFP breaking their core values by cheating, never going to happen.

Its not that hard to identify high quality stuff.

Gong to comment while knowing its a mistake to do so, because i think it could be useful. If someone leaves a comment and its shot down, they might feel bad and seek closure. They will comment back looking for it, but they can never get closure from you, because you refuse to give it at all cost. So it then tends escalates into an argument and then into name calling. Give them closure and don't give them any of your power. To give someone emotional control over you is to give your power to them.

@Shin "That will create integrity in the system that all of us are apart of", thought that was a great application of integrity, to design a system with integrity incentives.

Most forums will have a guide in the comment box so the guide is seen every time someone comments. Its a basic and very effective user experience hack. Here is the full guide line for the integral life forum. Condense this to a few words of wisdom and place it in the comment box. It would also be good training. Was thinking of making a chrome extension that adds words of commenting wisdom to every comment box on all sites. Would be nice. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Community Road Rules Integral Life strives to provide a community space that is integral—comprehensive, open, inclusive, and transparent. The quality of this integral space depends on the quality of your participation. Therefore, like all communities we have guidelines, and ours are integral. The following guidelines are designed to help make everyone’s experience in this “we-space” a fulfilling one: Let your very next communication in this space come from your Highest Self. If you understand what “integral” means, then let the next words out of your mouth be from your own integral mind or integral awareness. If you don’t know exactly what integral means, then use “Highest or Higher Self,” “True Self that is no-self,” “Spirit Mind,” “Big Mind,” or whatever you are comfortable with that evokes the highest or deepest or brightest You. Feel the thinker. Feel your self, feel your ego, feel the self-contraction. That which feels the thinker is beyond the thinker, that which feels the self is beyond the self, that which feels the ego is beyond the ego, that which feels the self-contraction is free of the self-contraction. When you feel the thinker (or ego, etc.), you engage your Higher Self. You take the stance of the Witness, the I that is aware of I, the I-I in you that is beyond you. And the Witness, although itself empty, takes on and speaks integral at any level. Therefore, feel your ego, or feel your self-contraction, and then speak and act from the awareness that’s doing the feeling; that sees the ego as an object like any other; that impartial Mirror Mind reflecting and embracing the universe in its brightness and luminous equanimity, the higher perspective that is no special perspective but open to all. Make the subject object whenever you can, and this will help you come from your Highest Self. But don’t make a big deal out of this. Simply try to feel the thinker or feel the self-contraction every now and then, and sooner or later it will make sense and feel natural to act from a higher level that is not the ego but is aware of the ego. (Those rules help with your Higher Self, however you understand and intuit it. And now, a few rules to help with your lower self (aka, your unconscious, your shadow, the disowned self, or the self that will sabotage your every move, given a chance). Discern your “emotional buttons,” or the things to which you overreact. In many cases, whether or not your judgment is true, a hyper-emotional recoil often means that shadow elements have been triggered, or as everyday parlance has it, somebody “pushed your buttons.” Simply notice this happening; try to make the subject an object (which, as we know, is the fundamental rule of development). In other words, try to make the reactive self (the lower self) an object of awareness. Just see and feel your emotional reaction; you don’t have to do anything else. It’s that simple. Don’t worry whether something spectacular happens or not; that very act has already caused a small transformation and disidentification, and repetitions of that simple act will have a profoundly cumulative effect. Of course, you can do more work on it if you choose, but most essentially, they are ways to just further that process. You can investigate this more if you want. If someone or some comment gets on your nerves, what are you pushing against? Seek the underlying value in you that is trying to be expressed in your emotional charge. If you’re experiencing strong recoil, resistance, or rage, odds are what you are experiencing is a symptom of your own shadow. If this is so, we recommend doing a little shadow work with your response (ahhh, so that’s what the Shadow Channel is for!). Again, don’t make a big deal out of this, but work on it in whatever way you know how. If you don’t want to do shadow work, or don’t have the time for it, not to worry: as we said, simply feel the self that is recoiling and acting negatively. Simply try to make the subject an object. And then go on about enjoying the community. Don’t wait for others to make the experience you’d like; ask explicitly for what you want and take steps yourself to help create it. Before you offer your wisdom to or about others, remember that your perspective is yours, and just one of many. Can you admit that your perspective is a limited one? Can you distill out your clear observations from your interpretations and assessments? Are you still curious about other perspectives? Are there any shadow elements in any of your interactions in the community? Before pointing out the negatives in others, we try to clean our own house first. Don’t be afraid to make judgments—we want your opinions and judgments very much—just try to have the next judgment that comes out of your mouth be a discernment from your Higher Self. It is your imperative to do your best to understand and accurately represent other people’s viewpoints. It is also your imperative to clarify your own viewpoint if you are feeling misrepresented. Your participation in the Integral Life community indicates that you have read and accepted these general guidelines, and that you will do your best to live up to them. Like communities elsewhere, IL reserves the right to refuse community service to anyone for whatever reason. We relish diversity of perspective; we also value basic remembering of the I-Thou We-space. If you’re routinely causing a disturbance, or not living up the guidelines, you will very probably be asked to leave the community. If you enter this community, you are agreeing that you can be removed for any reasons whatsoever judged necessary by IL, and reasons that do not have to be argued or explained; you are entering this We-space with that understanding and agreement. This mutual understanding is a pledge we all make to each other to engage or live up to the highest, deepest, best, brightest, clearest, caring Self that we can. This is our promise to each other, because we are here not merely to share, but to grow. Other communities share; IL community helps us grow, because the guidelines actually foster transformation and help us grow, even as we share. We all want to change the world, and IL actually does it—and you are now a member of that wonderful community, and we dearly welcome you. Just remember the single most basic Road Rule: when in IL, speak from I-I. We are here to grow, but also to play, to practice, to hear, to be heard, to dance, to reflect, to contemplate, to receive and to contribute. Stir the pot. Have fun. Debate. Put it out there. Reveal Spirit. It always already Is, and It always already is HERE. Community Etiquette The community that forms Integal Life is a dynamic part of the whole that contributes in immense ways to the experience for everyone involved. With this in mind, it is the policy of Integral Life to adhere to very particular guidelines with regards to internet abuse that might diminish the experience for any one of our community members. Integral Life does not encourage, nor propagate the use of Spam or Phishing in any of its manifestations, such as E-Mail Spam, Instant Messaging and Chat Room Spam, Chat Spam, Forum Spam, Blog Spam, Video Sharing Spam, and Social Networking Spam. An Integral Life Representative will never ask a member for a password. Should there be any question or concern regarding spam or phishing, please contactMember Support with detailed information into the matter at hand. Each inquiry will be dealt with on a case to case basis. Serious infractions may result in suspension or cancellation of a member’s account. Also, Integral Life is a community that honors diversity and breadth of opinion and experience in all manifestations. Community interaction at all levels of experience is not only necessary, but also inevitable. Therefore, there might be times that arise when the dialogue between two or more members escalates in intensity. Even during these times Integral Life strives to hold a safe container that recognizes and respects the myriad views that we all hold. However intense the interactions may be, we ask that members refrain from personal attacks, defamations of character, and trolling, baiting, or flaming other members. For a great guideline to community interaction that is held here in high regard, check out the above Community Guidelines. The Integral Life Forum encourages passionate discussion, respectful disagreement, and even interpersonal “shadow work”. Members are invited to explore, engage, and challenge each other. However there comes a point when prolonged clashing is unproductive for everyone. It is healthy for individuals to let go and important for Site Moderators to cultivate an atmosphere that is attractive to many participants. Moderators will use their discretion in giving warnings which may lead to a decision to suspend one or more participants. 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@tatsumaru There are parasites that can live in the nose. This actually common. Some supplements can kill them and the parasite will leak out of your nose, its awesome. The reported effect is congestion relief, easy of breathing.

Yes if i intentional ogle their features, women stand out as sexual opportunities. Also she doesn't have to be hot or human, there just needs to be intimacy or a connection. With men it cuts through the bullshit, there has to be high intimacy and connection, with women no connection can still get the job done (like porn). It could be its just that i haven't been with a man, maybe after some experience gay porn will be more attractive. A separate issue is not being understood in relationships do to the development gap.

@EddieEddie1995 haha just realized my post is basically a gay mans wet dream come true. "Straight best friend wants to experiment and he loves it" fantasies. So i did some exploration, turns out gay porn is not appealing, i think what is attracting me is the intimacy of being with a man i connect with. This is arousing. Maybe there is a kind of deeper connection that only men can have with each other that a hetor pairing cant? Maybe im looking for deeper connection with a woman and feel i cant find it so the mind is wondering else where. All relationships with women have been one sided because im more vertically developed then they are, its me adapting and catering to there needs, they dont understand me.

Ill try dry and water to experience the difference. Is there no way to avoid this?

Humidity can block nose. Stress can block a nose. It could be as simple as relaxing your face and breathing properly.

Are we not your friends? What is a friend to you? What do you need?

I was in the exact situation + health problems for years. Luckily i didn't have access to a gun. I started going to the park everyday, everyday i would stay there longer and longer, just sit there doing nothing or exercised or played with the children. Eventually it clicked that this was better then anything i was doing for the past 20 years. That there is no one here to do anything and there is nothing to do anywhere. All the things that mattered disappeared and i could just sit doing nothing and be content. It is such a relief, that it is all just a fabrication.

WQ = (EQ + IQ + ...) Wisdom

Seems to depend on the stage of development people are in there lives, highschool years can be a popularity content for women, over focus on looks defining them, especially that culture is strongly communicating this. Men can be competitive in other ways, but at the high school level they seem to get along better. Good looking people have more options and can be more selective, things are easier in this department. They can pick someone of interest out and pursue with high success. Its only if you are shallow that you cant discern that a partner is shallow, its definitly an issue for some men, Empathetic men can read people like a open book and seek high conscious qualities in a partner, they are not fooled. Well unless their young... there is still a learning curve. People crave the attention of good looking people, walking in a hallway or on the street people will literally grab you by the arm and pull you towards them demanding the attention. If your shy its worst because they see they can dominate you, they sense it. Everyone wants to be your friend if your shy and good looking, in highschool even the bullies and teachers where my friend, everyone overal men or women are highly attracted to you and want your attention. They see you as a more "valuable" friend, more interesting, even if your not.

Not clicking click bait thumbnails Clicking click bait thumbnails only after consulting higher self.

@StarStruck Sorry about that i ment this video, the first girl, it was so funny...

@Tetcher Peanuts are packed with toxins, its the unhealthiest nut. Just exercise intensely everyday and eat wtv you want.

@Kay100 Thanks :), really there are few down sides. If we stretch things maybe we can find some issues but really its all a advantage. - Generally very good looking people are going to be the center of attention when walking into a room. "is he a model?" So if your shy it could be a problem. I grew my hair long and covered my face with it just to avoid attention (15-19 age). Unfortunately the hair coler was bright red... there is no blending in. Every compliment is the same and superficial and is uncomfortable for everyone, makes people feel bad around you, so it could cause you to avoid social interactions. Again this is rich first world problems... guys with less empathy will own this and take full pride and advantage of it (blind by privilege) - Women can get very nervous around you, i had no idea this was happening until someone told me in my 20s, they get stuck in star struck mode and there real personality cant come out. Young women mostly. Again we are imagining problems here. - Some times women would tell me how amazing there boy friend was (extensively), then they try to sleep with me (with out me hitting on them). I had to remind them they where hurting people with these actions. Basically if your a good person you need to take responsibility and back up the girls boyfriend, its abit ridiculous. Id rater support and help a friend have success, then have success, like a wing man, its more fulfilling, but a very good looking wing man is not ideal. - There can be awkward sexual tensions with your friends GFs. And its not wanted, i care about supporting friends. So if the friend figures this out they will avoid having you around their GF. If they break up the GF might try to contact you and you'll have to reject them and hope the friend doesn't find out. - With age and healthy problems come and looks fade does people who complimented you will look at you in disgust "how could he have done that to himself, he was so good looking", your not allowed to age. lol - There was never any competitive jealously with other men because i have their backs. But if your good looking and take no responsibility for it, then it can easily be an issue. Making friends isn't really about looks, its more about the operating system. If your superficial your going to attract other superficial people that care only that your good looking. Being good looking doesnt make someone superficial. Most good looking people dont care that there good looking, they never think about it unless they are stuck in living up to peoples expectations. All of this is not really a problem, the advantages are very high overall and strongly out way anything in the "not so good looking" camp.