Elia

I have a friend who is counselor in a school. And the other day she told me that she had a guy come in, he has suicidal thoughts so they talked about it. She told him that she was sorry he was going through this. To which he replied that she didnt have to feel sorry, that deep down no one cares, people like her are just trained to say these things. She didnt know what to reply and honestly what do you reply to such a thing? Because in the end it's true. Nobody cares ultimately. Unless the other person has something to offer to you. And I was wondering also in the same train of thought, in our relationships with others how honest can you be? If we were 100% honest, we would admit that we are using others all the time for all sorts of reasons. For eg if people were more honest, a child asking their parents why they had him/her would hear that he/she was brought into this world to give his/her parents a sense of purpose or alleviate their loneliness. what are your thoughts on this?

I agree

@Leo Gura that was an interesting video and got me thinking towards the end, it is ironic how this goes: survival --> suffering --> observe and change survival to reduce suffering --> better survival.

why do you say this?

@rNOW Thank you, this is an approach i never really tried before.. Usually the advice i read and hear of is about changing one habit here and there (like sleep or being mindful of the craving) but these things never really helped me, i would go back to eating food and then feeling bloated and guilty about it. @Truth Addict yes, i still need to get back to a sport very soon, thanks for this reminder!

Hi, so whenever i find myself facing a heavy emotional problem or when i am bored I will always want to use food to numb myself or give me comfort, its so bad that food has become an addiction (sugar specifically). Has anyone overcome this before?

this is a nightmare. no escape, no rest... One cannot even look forward to death because you will be conscious again. Conscious in every possible way, through the life of a peaceful monk, through that of a slaughterhouse cow, a beggar in the street, a biology teacher, an emo teenager, an abandoned street dog, a dancer, a factory worker..

what do you mean? everyone judges all the time

@Markus thank you, i understand what you are saying and this helps a lot. I do take it personally, its really really hard for me not to, especially when it is a person you think is from 'your kind of tribe'

Hi everyone, I was wondering about rejection this week because I have been working on it recently and what i found is that I don't care so much being rejected by people i do not look up to or am inspired by. However, what if it's being rejected by an old friend or someone you admire, or someone you love, this hurts a lot because these are the people you recognise yourself in and with whom you want to associate. Has this happened to you before and how do you handle this type of rejection?

what is this.........

Hi everyone, thank you for your advice, actually I am happy to see the different opinions on this; from the women as well as the men on this forum. It is interesting to hear your perspectives.

Hi, Everyone is welcome to join the conversation of course but this subject is mainly oriented to girls. Because I see a lot of posts for guys on how to be successful with the opposite sex but i haven't seen a lot of advice for women Ladies, my question is, how did you get successful with your man? How can a modern day woman find men who are kind, mature, and relationship material. Most of the men i have met in my life were not interested in a relationship, but were just looking for a sex friend. This saddens me because many times i did wish to have a relationship with them but they never had any emotions towards me. I am also not attracted to many guys and all of the ones who i do feel attracted to are not interested in me. It is very frustrating. I tried tinder but this app feels like a scam mostly. I do go out in bars occasionally (rarely) but these places are emotionally draining for me and the non stop small talk feels very boring. I also never get approached by men. And so i decided i didn't want to wait around for nothing to happen so nowadays i approach men spontaneously because if i don't do this, i know from experience nothing will happen. I ask for small things like, what is the time? or; where can i find this place? And I always hope that the guy will continue the conversation afterwards but every time he will just answer my question and that's that. Any advice ?

im the same......Always trying to please so much.... its so annoying, and such a difficult program to get out of

As an introvert, I stay alone most of the time but recently I've realised this became problematic for me. I started living in my own imagination more than in the real world. I fantasise about anything and everything. So much so that it also influences the way i will relate to other people. I project things on them, things that they are not. Living in this self made bubble prevents me from confronting the real world. Now i cannot trust my mind anymore. But why does a mind do this? Why do our own minds trap us in this way when really it should have our best interest first ? And if i cannot trust my own mind, what can i trust?