Yoshy

@electroBeam You may be right to some extent and I might have developed a shadow . And if I had no egoic problems i would be an enlightened being , and that is not the case yet . But I wont go into some self guilt and self hate because I have disdain for interactions . I disagree on a massive point tho , spirituality is LETTING GO of manipulations . Manipulations are for survival .

Ah ... to be hairless monkeys in a monkey society . I am not a zen devil because I distance my self from this giant circus . All sage firgures / role models went trough phases of isolation in their lives , It is valuable .

To be honest , I lied a bit . I have been in intimate scenarios before , but because I never have a condomn on there is no penetration . I might try for the sake of experience but Im a bit obsessed with self improvement now .

@flowboy conscious masturbation is on another level

@Preety_India I completly agree and resonate with your comment , thank you .

I think going vegetarian is the most concious choice . The ecological choice , the compassionate choice , the healthy choice . I want to go vegetarian but circumstances make it a bit tricky , once im independent it will be done .

@Gesundheit Fear of being attacked , this feeling was so new and I felt so vulnerable .

They are tired of living because they are alone, have no passion and spent their lives getting crushed by wage slavery . If transhumanism was a thing I would run to go get a 5000 yo life expectancy . I completly agree .Be the top 1% and let the sillicon valley do the job . Transhumanism will be for the top 1% only .

Before I share my little glimpse I had today I need to say that I never did psychedelics and that im not a smoker / drinker . I dont usually meditate . So I was walking in the forest and sat on a bench for a while and I was contemplating . I started staring at a bush and the more I stared the more the bush expanded until it occupied my whole view and .... I lost focus and everything got back to normal . Experimented a second time at home but my monkey mind was much more active and I could see objecs get bigger and then smaller as if they were breathing . My experience reminds me of the first seconds of this video , but I got stuck there and did not cross the line . Also had a few insights and I was unusually joyful after that .

I didnt want to go into a lenghty description of what I felt but its absolutly not just an optical illusion

Non duality makes me experience moments of derealisation and deperzonalisation and I hate this existential pain

If you want to see real stage red in action i would recommend gore web sites where you can see uncensored crimes ( especially gang crimes ) . This is not for the faint of heart and there is a reason why this content is censored everywhere else . It will also be conter productive if you try to integrate that everything is love .

In my direct experience time exists

You dont know the value of WW2 yet . If we do our duty of memory correctly this will never happen again . To not happen in the futur it had to happen at least once , because we learn from experience .

Hard nose science is exactly what Im doing in uni i ! I considered investing in stocks for months, but have been too absorbed by my studies and self doubts . And Im still ignorant about the practical parts of investing , that is how do I buy a stock in the first place lol . But I get the whole point of investing and which companies are a safe investment .

I used to be a practicing muslim , praying 5 times a day , virgin by choice , having no disbelieving friends , no relation with the opposite sex ect .... Im 20 years old and left Islam one year ago , I used to argue on this forum for the blue god now Im literraly anti religions . Trying to avoid the traps of stage orange that I still have to fully integrate . Ask me anything

LOL Honestly I rather do online sex work to escape wage slavery than go to prison and be surrounded by devils .

Lets skip the whole critical thinking thing , its a skill everyone should develop anyways . On top of that skill what changed the most is the variety of information I allow myself to search , open mindedness and thoughts . My headspace is much more vast than it used to be , I really feel like being free in my head . I used to CENSOR my own imagination ( because I thought that God would be aware of my thoughts and I was ashamed ) , now I can create any world I want in my head and feed It with any Art I wish . And thank you for your comments

Im so grateful . I almost got trapped in an arranged marriage with a very religious girl , but somehow we didn't make it that far . I was heartbroken at that time , I loved that girl . Now I realize that life has prepared something else for me .

In the first two months yes , at some point I wanted to revert but I just couldn't justify this belief anymore . You can't force yourself to believe a lie once you recognize it's a lie . Of course there is a deeper islam , but its still surrounded by a ton of useless beliefs and ego . Nihilism made me sad . There was times I would say to myself " So this materialistic boring life is all there is huh ? Am I just a random event In an infinite universe of probabilities ? Is my destiny only to die and get eaten by worms ? Why keep going , why do I wake up ? ect ...." But it was still a big relief to leave religion anyways . I emotionally traumatized myself for a God that doesn't exist , I would cry on my prayer mat realizing how sinful and dirty i was and have nightmares about hellfire . I really went trough the full blue experience lol

Yup , made me loose weight and significantly improved my mood . I like to put some in my rooibos

Now that you know that you are the universe , the conciousness . How can I integrate that to create the life I want to live ? With humble expectations of course , I dont expect to go and live in another dimensions with aliens and faeries ( even if that would be more exciting than going to college for 10 years ) . And when I say I , im speaking as my ego of course . I know that if I dont have the life I want I might kill myself , Im not going to live 60 years of quiet desperation sadness and regret , might sound capricious but this it . Thank you very much .

Haha so you assumed Im a smoker , I dont smoke my friend Yeah , I want to this carreer so I can be free on top of doing something I like . Im not going to work for someone's company getting crushed doing a 9 to 5 job , thats just not happening .

I think that deep down I wanted to know truth , thats why I got into religion in the first place . Then I accumulated enough knowledge from my religion , philosophy and science to see the flaws withnin my world view . I used to make excuses to protect my faith whenever I fell into an innacurracy or something weird , but at some point they accumulated so much that I could not blind myself anymore . The day before I finnaly left I watched a bunch of videos from an Atheist activist , his name is Aaronra . And my little bubble bursted . Transcending a whole stage really makes you a different person , It feels like building a new ego . People who knew me as a muslim dont recognize me today . What helped the most is the fact that Im young , I didnt invest too much of my life into this cult . Some people are married , send their children to religious school , their social circle is full muslim ect ... Thanks to my self , I didnt fall into the trap of investing my whole life into it and left before its too late . Stage blue is very delusional , the quality people must develop is honesty with one's self . Leo's videos helped but I was very sceptic when watching him , his arguments propably worked on a subcounscious level ahah .

@Reciprocality Of course Im not expecting things to fall from the sky . Im already engaged in my life plan but its under the condition that I pass my exam with success . Its the hardest exam of my country and im competing with 800 people and im passing it in two months , my life plan depends on it . @Mvrs Thank you for your reply . Do you think that the law of attraction , visualisation and manifestation are a part of the hacking ? I will be trying to give back of course , there are prolemes in our world that are concerning to me and i hope I will be able to do my part once my needs are met . And without self deception I would say that my life plan is quite an healthy one . Sometimes Im sure I will make it but sometimes I doubt my self ...