Schahin

If I am god and you are god, does that mean we have total control? Is there not the universal consciousness that has things planned or do we humans have all the control as we are God? I mean if the consensus is that we humans dont have free will then there must be the god that we dont have access to as long we still are humans and "he" has our lifes and the events in control and the weather and historical moments etc? Lucky moments occuring to us, certain people appearing in our lives, certain insights evolving out of nowhere, this must be an "outside" god that planned it like this and by outside I simply mean the godhead we dont have access to in our normal states of being. It just scares me to know that I must do everything as I am God although I haven't reached that consciousness completely. I hve a personal issue in my family that is very tragic of a member being mentally ill and it affects me directly and I have no help and need to help and endure that person with all the ugly facets completely alone. I also know if I had done a few things in the past to save him, he wouldnt be like this bad nd ugly now. To me it feels as if I was egoistic and I was indeed. But did I even have a chance to be otherwise? What is the current belief on free will now, I hear everybody has a different opinion about it. If I am god and you are and there is no god outside of this here, then it also means total and absolute free will or no? So I am in doubt if I we are the only one there is and current states of life are due to reckless egoistic usage of free will in the past and have to deal with it because we are God and lonely or Is this something our beloved universal "formless" God creates in love and goodness and has also planned the future with care and love.

Not quite brother. I think this is once you liberated your spirit and have come in conection with it. Which means ones you raised yiur consciousness to become awarw of that. But I am not at that stage yet, I try and try but the lifecircumstances throw so many stones at your head that you fall back into your story and become persecuted by emotions and questions about existence But yeah what do you mena by that anyway? Do you believe in free will from the human point or do you believe in God creating life while you are unconscious of it and or even while you are conscious of it? Because certainly it's not you as a human that has total control about everything that happens in life. Otherwise you could simply change the world with your intuition.

Hmm well thank you for your answer for sure it is the truth. Nonetheless my question is about the free will and if I am n the only one with all the responsibility or is god also outside planning this imagination? Because even if it is imagined and there is no us, still it is for a useful purpose this imagination and we are in it and take decisions that are important. And it would be good if it is well taken care of and that it is and was planned with a good purpose, or maybe it is not planned and is entirely up to our own free will

Yeah that was what basically wrecked him, the mental facilities here where I live are concentrations camps with even less freedom. Here when you mention you have mental issues, you are unfortunately out of society within seconds due to very narrow-minded peopme and immense stigma and when you trust yourself to a doctor you have high chances to get a nasty diagnosis which labels you for your entire life and gives the professionals the right to treat you with special methods. This is not a joke unfortunately. Lots of innocent mentally unstable people here that were damaged to the extreme by the mental "professionals" both physically and psychologically. And after all the abuse there is no real trustworthy outside social help, and this morning I saw the whole scene and had an insight that it all seriously is totally up to me to resolve this serious problem, because not only am I the only one in the world and need to take responsibility on full but also if I want to be happy in this life I seriously need to start doing something really good as I love that person and it is my story and I am all there is. But yeah am I really all there is to god being stuck in a mission or lifelesson and was it my lack of good usage on the free will and acting out of heart that it is like this, or is it like this because the formless God plannes our lives exactly like this and there is no free will and it cant be other than this, as this is what god wants. I wont be happy to hear the second answer is true just to be conforted, I seriously like to have a more enlightened answer only., that would be totally comforting

Thank for you advice brother, But having almost experienced death and totally panicked on it, is it advisable to use anything less than 5 meo/Bufo? Because any other psychedelic could lead me to that same panick again, and make things worse maybe. I mean i dont know whats your opinion?

Is there any therapeutic value for a sub breakthrough dosage? It was my first time and I wished the facilitator wouldnt have brought me there giving a low dosage and then becoming insane and coming back to my body who is actually very disappointed by me having tried to murder it. So now I have been taking calming pills everyday otherwise I get very disconnected and fly into the insanity. I am trying to water fast which helps but everytime I get seduced by something solid to eat I feel disconnection and spaciness going towards that insanity feeeling. I have the feeling I have to repeat it with the breakthrough dosage in order to find out who I am because during the oncoming phase of ego death I totally forgot who I am and where I was, like beconing insane and confused. But I have no idea if it gets worse, as I just want the medicine to heal me and give me understanding and not to show me more terror, but I have no idea how it works after the breakthrough. I am not good at letting go of certain things in my life, for example my dear brother who is dependant on me. So what will I expect if I dont let go?

@Leo Gura What have you found out about these things: Does each human have a predetermined or preplanned destiny? Therefore is free will really non existent? The ayahuasca followers still say that free will is inherent to every human. Do coincidences exist or is everything carefully wanted to be as it is, withouth coincidences, pure destiny.

Ohh thanks Good to know. Now I know that even breakthrough doses don't involve necessarily blissfull states. But what's your opinion, are sub breakthrough doses for beginners plain wrong? I just felt extremely anxiety like the universe was about to collapse, and it was all just me in here and the others were like evil people that finally managed to get me into the wrong situation at the wrong time instead of doing something productively I'm sitting here with this facilitator and tryng to murder myself. Maybe a little bit exaggerated but at the peak of the anxiety that's what I felt. And that doesn't seem to have a therapeutic value, yet I'm thinking about doing it Again with a higher dose but can't really get myself to it and risk to damage something. They say I need to trust, but then stories about no bliss after breakthrough makes me wonder if it's worth it, but its still better than that oncoming ego dying phase?

Thank you brother I had no anxiety with mushrooms but they deceived me in that they told me taking mushrooms its just perfect, and gave me the feeling that I can recommend it to my brother who took them and now is totally deluded. And in order to help him and get him back on track I tried many things for one year, and things are getting nowhere no outside support is available and then i got the calling for bufo which was in such a crazy way that I can call only destiny. I only came to know this forum when i searched for this mysterious toad and then registered here. So I am not sure if the anxiety was there because it was a sub breakthrough or if it was the message of the spiriti that i shouldnt do it yet. And yeah because the oncoming of the bufo effect made me insane and suspicious of my environment I totally could feel how my deluded brother feels when he enters his postmushroom panickattacks. Multiplying that fear times 100000 doesnt allow me in any way to let go of this life. So On a high medicine its probable that the medicine forces you to let go. But does that force damage you psychologically? And how probable is it that you reach the other side, like opening the door and you see darkness and insanity and why?? I mean this medicine is there to get to know the real you and not get back to darkness, i thought the other side is pure light and awareness. Maybe i am wrong ill appreciate answers

Hey people, i posted one page back. I'd like to know some opinions on somethings. I had my last and first bufo alvarous cerimony smoked a few days ago with a sub breakthrough dose. I wrote that it give me an extreme panick and i was filled with guilt and worries towards my brother who is mentally unstable and I could help but keep making excuses and have doubts overall on how to procees the best way. So i wanted to do the cerimony in order to find peace and get rid of fhe doubts and be able to make more conscious decisions. It was like waking up to life in the most difficult time and pure panick and feeling of conplete lonelyness in the world as if I am the only one there is but not from the soul perspective but from the human perspective. Also i was almost becoming insane and feeling evilish vibes from the facilitator, which was probably my ego on defense. I wish i had gone through the full dosage because then i was just too afraid to do it once again, especially because that becoming insane reminded me too nuch of my brother, he must have the same issues when he panicks but that without 5 meo. So now I dont really feel connected to anything its all normal but sometimes i get anxiety and take a pill. I also started to refrain from food, because any kind of food makes me anxious except fruits. IMy body is also not forgiving me for having tried to murder it. I am also sas about having tried to murder it. If I do it again I will again be not able to let go but this time it will not be sub breakthrough though but a higher dosage. But I really want to do it because I think that is the ultimate way I can bring on conscious decisions to help my family and clear my insecurities. Other medicines have helped but not really given any answer, mushrooms deceived me hugely. So if I do it again but am not able to let go, what will happen? I am sure i wont be able to let go of my brother especially not in that panick phase which reminds me million times of him and also during that immensw confusion which comes very heavy and fast cannot even think of letting go its like being buried by rocks. Will the medicine make me let it go by itself? And where does this kind of letting go end up? Some facilitator told me thta there is even a chance of you coming into contact with the dark part of your soul after breakthrough is that true? I am totally looking for having an enlightenment experience which ckears my doubts and fears and tells me everything is okay. Meeting the darkside and panicking would be totally not fine, because I already feel quite disconnectes through the last experience. Thanks for any advice

Where in peru did you experience it? I am looking for a place in Pucallpa

I am a little bit afraid of trying it one more time in order to breakthrough, as I was experiencing panick attacks this morning due to the last session which wasn't a breakthrough. Should I try it again and breakthrough to heal my self of what the sub breakthrough may have caused? I hear various stories that a breakthrough does not necesseraly mean meeting the light but can mean meeting your darkness also and therefore panicking more. I know i was in the wrong set and setting but I went for it to experience true guidance and orientation. I have lots of faith and trust still and would go for one more shot but I am not sure if I will go if its not obvious that the other side is light, but darkness and panick. I hear many different accounts of different facilitators. Mine says just do it you had too little you will see the unity, and someone else said that this is not guaranteed to see. And also I still believe the spirit of the toad had exactly this message of panick in mind, and when it came so much, the same day I was not ready for a breakthrough dose anymore. But now with weird symptoms occuring (which I have under the control now by the way, but fear they could come back) am not sure if doing a BT dose is the reassuring way to go or if it is stupid. Was it just plan stupid to try smoke a sub breakthrough dose, did anybody ever feel okay in that range as a first timer? A first timer should probably get the full Message because everything under that is just confusing and terrifying. I hope you understood my core questions

Yes that is true, the challenging stuff came up but that was all within a few seconds that is why I thought I am losing my mind. It was all too fast, but would it be a breakthrough dose it would have gone straight into awakrning I think. Low doses are weird, i am not sure if it was predetermined by god to only experience that and wake up and not die yet... Not sure, that bothers me. Okay i thought the blissstage would be just normal, but the psychological baggage you say is probably that phase of losing the mind? Does that insanity continue if taking a higher dosage or even become stronger? I seriously thought i went crazy and never get out and will be suspicious towards everyone all the time living in the greatest fear ever, thanks that didnt happen though

But is this demonization and the rejection already happening during the trip while in the blissful stage? That sounds crazy, I can imagine it happening long afterwards it has ended. As long as it doesnt leave one psychologically damaged or insane I think it is doable, what do you think? Seen anything damaging in someone? I am unfortunately absolutely not in the right set nor setting for mushrooms i think they are more confusing also. 5 meo dmt sounds like there is not even a set and setting needed as you forget your story, and you become the set the setting the medicine the surroundings and everything. Mushrooms last time unfortunately taught me something extremely disastrous in that they are safe and that I could recommend them to a sensible person in my fam for autotherapy, which unfortunately went totally wrong and we still deal with the consequences. Thats why I am keen on trying 5 Meo because I cant afford false or deceiving messages right now I want to be straightforward and on the right path

I am not too experienced no, just twice ayahuasca and one mushroom a year ago. Yeah it is smoked as I did it with a facilitator. Can I ask what do you mean it can be challenging? I mean truth is truth right? For everyone and in a non dual state there shouldn't be suffering right? I am doing it less to explore myself but more to be completely reborn and be able to make straightforward conscious decisions now as I need to make really important sensible decisions in order to help someone I love alot in my family but am super doubtful on how to help this someone, which I have ignored for too long as I couldnt find the right answer and it bothers me immensely

I see that one yeah, well i didnt even have a chance to think about anything or even to take a deep breath it was just pure confusion, no chance to let go of anything as it was way too heavy and confusing and terrifying and me becoming insane and not too high to breakthrough. So yeah I thought the spirit taught me something in that regard, id like to trust and try it again but what do you mean by a high dose can be challenging? Does it mean it could involve any kind of suffering also? It must be better than a low dose in any sense because low dose is just weird. There must be a way to let go smoothly without all the confusion, how can the ego with so much going on let go volubtarily?

I have recently had a sub breakthrough dosage of 5 meo dmt with a facilitator, as he said it jt would be better to start small, he asked the spirit of the medicine to give me what I need and direction, and when I went into the trip it was just panick and confusion. It made me feel like some loved person in my family feels, who is mentally ill, so I am not sure if that was the message I had to receive, as it made me clear how this person feels like. I was too afraid to try it once more, as it shook me too hard. I was kinda awoken into this life but at the complete wrong time and i think the message was to stay clear of these substances, but I really am not sure if it was just wrong to start at a low dosage. I had the sense of being the only one in the world and it has only been me all the time, but not in a nice way, bit in a terrifying way of having thought there are others around but there was noone and I was waking up to this fact. This great sense of panick and confusion did not even let me let go and also i really saw changing my frequency to other dimensions, so that the facilitator started to look very evil to me and as if I was tricked by him. So i am not sure what happened if it was the low dosage or me not letting go or the spirit saying to stay away but I just got afraid of trying it again and then really slipping into another dimension and ending up insane, because that was what I felt

Could the medicine be the one medicine that cures the lives of any mentally ill people?

Well anxiety and phobias are actually well known to be treated by psychedelics. Especially social phobia. I think we should distinguish taking psychedelics for fun or using them in a correct ceremony as a medicine. They are acually medicine, some say a tool for consciousness work, that is true, Many say sacred medicine which makes more sense because it heals you and brings you back to who you really are and burns away the baggage of negativity you acquired which made you depressed/anxious/scared or delusional. The reason why we think schizophrenia is not well treated with sacred medicines I think is more of a common misconception that says that these illnesses are unhealable. But that is just the view of western psychiatry, that really has no idea in the first place. As said before, mental illnesses can be very well treated by prolong fasting which itself is also a the best medicine as Hippocrates said too

Well I meant mental illnesses in general, but for me the important one is schizophrenia, I dont have it by the way. The question would still apply to all mental illnesses. Schizophrenia to me just seems like a confused person, someone that is disconnected to the universe, from its own spirit. I am no chronic schizophrenic to evaluate it better but already had a sub breakthrough experience with the medicine and it totally felt like schizophrenia to me even only for a few seconds but I had the feeling that I'd never come out of that state. The sense of being lost and not trusting your surroundings, being more or less completely alone in the world instead of united. So maybe schizophrenics are always in that sub breakthrough state due to whatever circumstances and factors, and just need that jump to unity and faith.

In the past, when there was no medication, people used to heal themselves by not eating anything for a prolonged period. This is a natural healing method if it apllies to every and anyone I am not sure Dr Juri Nikolajew. Russian psychiatrist found this out, while one persoj with schizophrenia refused to eat, and he refrained from the forcefeed practice, after a few days he started talking, and doing activities and by 25 days 70% got healed. Prolonged fasting must be a consciousness work also, as you refrain from the desires of the body and take care of your real self. Basically what I think the story of Adam and Eve was about, when they ate from the tree they pursued their bodily needs and forgot who they really were and therefore left paradise, as they got distracted with human desires and you can only see the true self, leaving all your desires, which are all distractions. 5 Meo Dmt breakthrough probably does the same and makes you remember yourself and therefore could be beneficial just as fasting is, but maybe it would be good if someone really had problems tried it and came here to comment. I had my own experience with 5Meo but it was sub breakthrough and it was not fun, and I literally could feel how a schizophrenia suffering human feels, am a little bit afraid of trying it again, as I think I received the message that was needed and couldnt bring myself through it again, but yes probably after feeling schizophrenic you feel the universal unity and end the schizophrenia. So mental illness could be probably a person that has just lost himself due to severe trauma and other factors. He cant recognize himself anymore and got pushed down by his thinking, Beliefs, bad experiences, all mental illnesses are different but I am talking abiut the severest, schizophrenia. So 5 Meo or fasting could help to remember andbe yourself again and burn away what has led you astray and made you mentally ill. What do you think?

But definitely the great amount of people just live unconscious or rather not awoken yet and for certain people there is this urge of awakening be it that a friend told them about certain psychedelics (my case) or be it through the inner voice telling you something. So up until that point that someone tells you about 5 Meo for example so that you awaken and perform on your free Will. Up until to that point you are rather unconscious and be driven by your thoughts and emotions. So it must be the absence of free will that one receives the voice to awaken, because the inner voice or recommendation of a friend certainly are not just by accident. And then who puts these thoughts and emotions into the human being? If he is God then he himself should decide what thoughts and emotions should arise, which for a not awoken person is extremely difficult. The same applies to dreams, we can't control our dreams unless we train lucid dreaming, so no free will, unless we get the message to train lucid dreaming, which is also hard training for itself.

If the consensus is that there Is no free will, therefore everything is predetermined. Did this view change among the community here or does it still hold true? If everything is predetermined that means, we are just pursuing things that were "agreed upon" before birth? Or do we indeed have free will as we are God right now and change our lifes from moment to moment?

In this dream we are living some things constantly happen over again or remain the entire time. For example Jesus. He is the one personality that seems to have the highest divine figure but why? Who was this man really? And why is he so worshipped? I don't want to be provocative I am only asking. I heard today some videos talking about Jesus, he seems to have talked a lot about himself. I read also things in the Bible that have very deep meaning and are very beautiful written about life but at the end is he the light and only him? Also could he walk on the surface of the water and turn in into wine,this is incredible, but what are all these magic tricks for, it's too long ago also. Also, what does it mean he died for our sins?

Hello dear people, recently I have heard of healers that channel to other beings (I think from other dimensions, or frequencies, not too sure), these beings could be called angels as their frequency is very high. These angels thereby do a surgery on the Astral body of a person and heal him from various ailments. I have asked around in an ayahuasca group I participate in and also another group and the people seem to have experienced healing through this method. Who else knows about it and knows if it truly works? If it worked for me it seems like it could replace the conventional medicine. Is there also a distinction between experienced Astral surgery channellers, better results and so on?