Emotionalmosquito

YES! That’s what I’ve been saying. So why do I keep being told the negativity I have inside is the reason I’m not having any luck?

Sex is a need, a very strong one. It may not kill you quickly like going without food but it does kill you slowly and more painfully of self destruction

Is testosterone not the key element of sex drive? Yes thank you for pointing that out. It’s also just as healthy on the vagina @Devin those undies are interesting, I could use a pair That’s true. I usually set up some towels on some chairs and an empty kiddie pool or something for privacy. Just happened to get unlucky those two times when I took a greater risk

Giving up right when we start getting somewhere? I’m shocked 😂 It’s crazy how some of you guys think I’m just trying to fight or play a charade instead of get to the bottom of an issue through discussion, as the forum is meant for. Do you really expect me to not have questions and comments about the advice I’m being given? I only sound like I’m fighting because I’ve tried lots of these things without much success. The “charade” is me trying to find out why the advice I’m given doesn’t work and what I can do differently.

If I have something I want to reply or say to someone, and I really really want to, but I decide I better not because there’s a strong probability it will be perceived as tasteless and disgusting and get me blown out or kicked out, how is that not the exact opposite of talking openly and sincerely? If you have all these things you wanna say but can’t because normies will hate your guts for it, there is no openness in that. The advice at its core always comes down to “be yourself”. That clearly isn’t working so here I am. This is the problem in a nutshell: Feel insatiably horny so go out and try to get laid get blown out and chased into hiding because I didn’t know what I was doing come here or other self improvement community. Get told it’s all my fault and I should be myself and talk openly and chill next time instead of trying to do everything perfectly Go out and do exactly that, once again, goes poorly come back and get told I wasn’t calibrated enough which made me look extremely weird to others justifying them being so unforgiving towards me So I use more calibration the next time around. All it does is put me in my head worried about accidentally saying something uncalibrated, but at least it doesn’t get me kicked out come back complaining about no girls being interested get told I need to be more filterless and speak openly with people because being in my head makes me unfun to talk to and we’re right back where we started Are you starting to see why I’m so tripped up over this? Calibration vs free expression is either a great balancing act or an outright contradiction. All I know is I’m very good at one at the cost of the other.

You mean like a house party? That would be different than an open public venue because at least at a party there’s a chance of the hosts considering both sides of the issue without bias. In a club, the women are the cash cows, the reason all the men are there and why so many drinks get sold. So they’ll do anything they can before kicking them out. If it was a public space you’re talking about then I’m glad to hear that. Even still, she was probably acting like a total unhinged freak to get herself the boot, much worse than whispering in someone’s ear or saying something uncalibrated. Right? Do average people with girlfriends and families never have mental health problems? I know it won’t solve any traumas, but neither will an exercise routine or a healthy diet. It may not solve anything fundamentally but it sure will help massively. I am sure of it. I would never under any circumstance. Being locked in a cell for ten years doesn’t sound very good. (Btw, even not being a rapist isn’t enough to fully protect you from life ruining accusations anymore) When someone craves sex as much as I do, even if they know they are aren’t a rapist, isn’t needing and wanting it so bad enough to make you come off like one? Let’s also not forget that lacking social skills alone is all it takes to make you appear as a potential threat in a woman’s brain. Because what’s so disrespectful about that? Isn’t there something we learn in this community about how social norms and things that make people offended are very subjective and vary radically between cultures? Some women actually appreciate that sort of humor. Doesn’t mean I should be punished for the crime of saying it to the wrong person. Because those are what everybody says. Saying something like that is different and unique and “unfiltered”. Notice people saying having no filter is a good thing. It makes you stand out, and in a good way for some. I’d rather say call her a lucky girl tbh, to switch things around for a change. Because they’re authentically expressing themselves with no filter, something people here say to do. I would love it if we could all stop freaking out so goddamn much about what others think and about people saying things that shatter our teeny tiny bubble of what is and isn’t appropriate. It’s called the golden rule: Treat others the way you’d like to be treated. But that goes both ways. If you think that harmless statement that in all likelihood could be found in a pg-13 movie is disgusting and tasteless, boy do I have news. There are jokes that are actually disgusting. I have some if they won’t get me warning points. Have you seen the how to get laid series? Leo says even wackier things than me and gets away with it. Go call him disgusting. Either people stop being gigantic fucking pussy ass little bitches about everything, or I’ll have to develop a much better filter and restrict the fullness of my personality to this bland, stale, cookie cutter version of reality and men and women that it sounds like you want. The murder comparison is wild. Now that we’re making crazy comparisons, you know how infuriating and disrespectful it is to women when people blame them being sexually harassed or assaulted on their choice of clothing? Same feeling for us when we get kicked out of somewhere for our choice of humor or conversational topic. Wanting to be a murderer just because they exist isn’t the same as wanting to be a filterless person because they exist One kills people, the other makes insecure people feel temporarily uneasy

I feel like all that’s gonna do is turn you into the guy on the right in this picture

Actually it may not be that simple. You know there’s a common thing where PUA masters will be very toxic and mean to the girls they pull as payback for putting them through so much misery to get to that skill level. If people (girls especially) were so good at picking up on people’s hatred towards them, shouldn’t they have not been able to attain such a high rank in the first place? This suggests misanthropy/misogyny is not necessarily an obstacle to getting good with chicks

I know this to be true with all my heart but most people who’ve had plenty of it keep telling me it’s actually not all that great once you get a taste of it, and they’re only helping us get it so that we’ll be able to see first hand that it actually isn’t everything so we can move on to the more important work. I disagree with this because there are lots of sex and bdsm addicts out there and I’m certain I’ll be one of those guys hooked and chasing it for life once (if) I finally experience it. Yes, it is completely God awful beyond words to be this miserably deprived with very little opportunity to work towards getting it, more and more with each passing year it makes me wanna

So I just looked for one. I typed in pro dommes in (my area) and it just came up with a bunch of sketchy websites and pics of women in their fifties. I clicked on one and it said “not secure” in the url bar so I noped the fuck outta there. I clicked on a different one and it was just some shitty website trying to confirm my age and info and stuff but the woman looked fairly hot. Didn’t say anything about being near my area. The ones i really want live a million lightyears away. What do?

Something tells me I’m a full half to blame for this thread being revived, at least

I wish you would’ve told me that. I’m already the undisputed, world class champion at making a fool of myself. It comes so naturally I do it by default without even trying The answer is approach. It’s absolutely harder to approach than to ice bathe. Harder to approach successfully that is. Ice baths do help you grow, but only towards getting better at taking ice baths. In my experience it does next to nothing at all for approach anxiety or making it easier to overcome other life challenges. All it is is an amazing and healthy temporary high and nothing more

My problem is how unforgiving people are about someone acting uncalibrated. If some girl gets a weird vibe from your social sloppiness, that’s very difficult to recover from because she tells others and suddenly everyone thinks they need to avoid you at all cost. When you make mistakes (which you’ll be making a whole bunch of as an inexperienced approacher) how do you mitigate the damage to your reputation?

Why? Indeed it would be. I’m fully aware of it. That’s why I strongly disagree when people say sex is just another experience at the end of the day. As if it’s not the most legendary thing in existence. If you were as completely and utterly deprived of female affection as I am and for as long as I’ve been, you just might be able to overcome that phobia Once you see in person just how good they can look I’m fully on board with bdsm being a healthy expression of sexuality. But as with anything else it can also become unhealthy. Just depends. While I have very little sexual experience to reference, I do agree that when you have one or multiple very strong kinky fantasies that get fulfilled, it makes the whole experience ten times more intense than just having vanilla sex. At least I think it would be.

Not if your city is too small and you don’t have the money or ability to get the money to move out If I understand it right, it sounds like she’s saying the reason men fail to get partners is because they’re not focused enough on what they want. That confuses me because when you get rejected by a girl, were you not focused on her? Currently yeah but it hasn’t always been that way. Even when I was in much better shape mentally and physically there were still no girls to be had

If a guy pins down a girl attempting to have his way with her so she knees him in the balls to escape safely, yes. Then it would be a well justified result of sexual abuse. But groin attacks by themselves are sexual abuse. Like when done in non-self defense scenarios such as for laughs or to get revenge over something.

Here’s an interesting bit from an article titled “Groin attacks and what you can do to protect yourself from it” from a website called “brain eggs” The way it says to protect yourself is basically just don’t piss off girls “For heterosexual boys, a late childhood or early teenage experience where there is painful stimulation of the genitals by someone from the opposite gender who seems to enjoy inflicting this sort of pain, is hypothesized to be at the source for the development of an unhealthy* fetish. A fetish that later turns these boys into men who get sexually aroused from women giving them extreme pain in the groin. (*A ballbusting fetish is unhealthy if it involves extreme pain without letting the body get used to it over the years. If initially it started out gentle and over the years it became harder, the groin tissue has likely become more resilient and can stand more impact with reduced risk of lasting damage. This sort of gradual build up is identical to the principle that also makes ‘iron groin’ training effective in the ability to withstand kicks to the groin.)” The article also makes the case that groin attacks on non-consenting victims can parallel the psychological trauma of that scene in survivors of sexual abuse. It technically is sexual abuse, just not traditionally or legally considered as such

There are still many others yes. But that “many” is smaller than its ever been in history and the numbers are still dropping rapidly. Notice the birth rates in most developed countries. The problem is way way way too big for it to purely be blamed on men not acting right. Some yes, but not all. A large chunk of it is millions of disenfranchised men like me fed the fuck up with all the bullshit and dropping out of the game because of it. But I’d still like to keep trying for a while before giving up for good. Go find some YouTube videos of “how to do xyz with a girl” and the top comments will usually be something like “Step 1: Find a girl” That’s very true but it doesn’t really apply to the pursuit of sex or temporary relationship. The sexual equivalent of that would be me going up to a girl and asking “Do you want to have sex with me.” Because likewise, my intention is having sex and it’s well known that sexual intercourse with another human can be a lot more fun than masturbation. But you clearly can’t be that straight forward about it and expect good results. Instead you have to jump through all kinds of retarded little hoops and obstacles that take years and thousands of approaches to master in order to consistently woo women to that point. There lies the problem. I think a big part of the problem this has with men and women dating wise is: Since women nowadays are being taught to regard every man that talks to them as a potential rapist or murderer, and men are being heavily heavily shamed and scorned for coming off at all creepy whatsoever whether intentionally or not, that puts us on eggshells to say the least when we try to approach a girl. That anxious, on edge feeling stemming from dreading accidentally looking creepy exudes out into the girl you’re trying to get with, entirely sabotaging the mission. The very energy you’re trying to avoid as to not give her a bad feeling about you, gives her that bad feeling about you. It’s like a self fulfilling prophecy perpetuated by both parties; guys because if they could some how stop worrying so much, they wouldn’t have that weird energy, and girls because if they’d stop inaccurately judging nervous guys as actual creeps and actual creeps as attractive gentlemen, then men wouldn’t have as much to worry about because they’d know the women could see they’re truly harmless despite the uncomfortable energy.

Nor do they have any consideration for how I feel so that should make us even. The fact some of you think it’s rightful to to remove me for very small offenses is everything wrong with the modern night life scene. Understand this: A guy on this forum got kicked from a club for whispering something in a girl’s ear. Just that. Another guy got kicked from a mall for nothing beyond running his pickup practice. I’ve also experienced it a few times for few reasons. Do you guys not realize or ignore the fact that women commit very similar offenses and worse with impunity because of their gender? If a woman whispered something in a guy’s ear at the club, would he be taken seriously if he called the bouncer over to deal with her in a similar fashion? Would she be thrown out or would the guy be laughed at? I seriously want an answer here. The same role reversal applies for most other so called violations. If a woman is sexually obsessed with a man in a club and won’t leave him alone, does he have the luxury of having the staff kick her out the same way she would in that position? You can’t use the “women are weaker and thus have to be more cautious” thing here. You can use that card when a guy approaches in an empty parking garage or alone on the street, but not in a club or mall packed with cameras, security, cops on speed dial and dozens of other men ready and willing to jump in to rescue a damsel in distress. In this scenario it is the man who has much more at stake by mistakenly giving a woman the creeps than the woman by being assaulted. Correct me if I’m wrong here and explain how. If nothing else just tell me why you say that as if I’m using that statement to downplay the actual severity of my actions as minor grievances. Even grievance is too strong of a word for what’s getting me in trouble. If a girl tells me she’s married and I respond with “A ring don’t cover a hole, girl!” That’s a good, fun-spirited comeback yet it’s exactly the type of thing that normies despise deep down even if they laugh it off in the moment. Girls crack jokes like that and worse all the time. Nobody cares, at least not enough to get them told to leave. WHY?

You’d definitely get the most bang for your buck that way. But again, I’m sure regular hookers aren’t too unfamiliar with being given rather odd requests. And I could probably mitigate some of the risk by making sure to be very careful with my instruction. I might be able to save an extra 1 or 2 hundred that way. “Pro-domme” just sounds pricey ✨Imagination✨ Actually i sort of went off topic saying that. If I’m going to be spending money on sexual experiences a doll would be the best investment in the long run I think. I mean tell me this wouldn’t be awesome to have as your very own

@kenway That could be awesome. Of course it would also run the risk of giving no enjoyment at all and leave me feeling like the biggest cuck in the world for paying to get beat up for no reason. But at least then I’d know. I guess you could always get a normal prostitute and tell her to do that one extra thing? What would really be awesome is a good quality silicone doll. The gift would keep on giving. Problem is they cost a fortune

What you call fighting I call trying to work through a very stubborn problem preventing me sexcess. When I argue with people, that doesn’t mean I’m dismissing everything they say as nonsense. I’m hearing lots of people say lots of things and I’m storing it all. For example, you talk a lot about LoA, manifestation, intention, God, that stuff. I used to be heavily into all that and it worked really well to get me into the love frequency, I felt incredible and my heart was as big as the universe (not being sarcastic, I’m serious) But that’s all it did. I wasn’t able to manifest anything but happiness and ecstatic spiritual orgasms of love and good will. I really really should have just kept going with that but instead I had to make a complete dumbass decision by trying to get a girlfriend and have physical sex. Once I saw how insanely difficult it was and how shitty real people are it slowly but surely depressed me all the way down to this miserable state. Maybe if you could experience being kicked out of a club for saying a dirty joke to the wrong person knowing women get away scot free with that exact behavior and worse all the time, you’d understand Maybe working as an attorney? I see your point. There probably is some way to get into a flow state that makes panties drop. Question is how do you attain that state. Like what exactly do you DO? How can this even be done knowing I’ll have to suppress my personality or (self)? Because being myself is the very thing that seems to be causing problems. Maybe that’s why they say fake it till ya make it When you say one tiny little thing wrong or make a wrong move, it’s very difficult to recover from that because the girl instantly becomes unattracted. That’s why the outer game technique is so crucial because you need to know logically what you can and can’t say, which varies drastically depending on the person. I’m starting to feel like calibration is a word of oppression thats used to alienate and shame us social outcasts into hiding. Calibration shouldn’t be necessary if you’re just trying to have a good time, let loose and be yourself. It’s the ultimate buzz kill. It’s literally the practice of restricting yourself to only expressing in ways others feel comfortable with. Which unfortunately is almost every bit of your full self for some of us

When you ask a girl out, that’s you focusing on what you want (her), not what you don’t want (not having her) Then she rejects you. This leaves you with what you didn’t want even though that’s not what you were focused on. Conversely, sometimes guys will ask a girl out fully expecting a rejection, (focusing on what they don’t want) yet are pleasantly surprised to discover she actually says yes. If what you say is true, how can this be?

They aren’t suffering as much as singles if they have full access to each other’s bodies, not even close. Seeing happy couples walking around arrogantly flaunting their love in our faces is cruel and disgusting of them. In fact I’ve been meaning to make a thread about just this. The fucking anger man, it puts you in full joker mode Does that mean if one day you say “I am 100 pounds” and the next day you say “I am 300 pounds” you’ll end up at 200 pounds? Well in the 20s you didn’t have onlyfans, Instagram, tiktok, sugar daddy arrangements, radical feminism, women with lucrative careers or internet as a whole pacifying a generation to never go out. All these things are why it’s becoming nearly impossible for men to find girlfriends or get laid. People were also just friendlier and easier to talk to in general because life was far more simple and there was no internet brain rot. I talked to my grandpa about dating back in his day. He was in the game back in the 50s and he said he asked out quite a few girls to find dates. His rejection/success ratio was about 1:1. Compare that with men of today getting rejected immediately 99% of the time I’m pretty sure incels of the current era have burning intention to get laid, look how well it’s working for them If it was that easy why can’t we just walk up, tell her to be our girlfriend and that’s that? If all we need is the same intention we have to stay alive, it should work that way. But it doesn’t. That’s why we do in fact need a robust skill set to secure any sexual activity at all

“”probably”” So you admit, sometimes people get kicked out wrongfully. I’ve experienced it, @something_else has experienced it and there’s even a thread about a guy telling about how he got kicked out of a mall recently. As far as the info he provided suggests, it was only for the crime of practicing pickup. Which, by the way things are going, pickup is soon to be legally considered harassment. Maybe a fucking moron isn’t what a person with solid inner game acts like, but it very well can be what someone being authentically themself may act like. But if being your true self is required to get women, yet it can also include acting like a fucking moron, yet moronic behavior is not what strong inner game is, haven’t we run into a problem? If that was true why would 63% of young men today be single and sexless? 63 fucking percent man. That’s outlandish. It’s obviously not that easy or the number wouldn’t be so astronomically high. This looks like a damned if you do; damned if you don’t situation. If you’re confidently relaxed and not in your head, that may make your vibe more fun but it also puts you at significantly greater risk of saying something tragically stupid, or even a just a little inappropriate. Because not being in your head means you aren’t using the critical thinking needed to properly judge what comes out of your mouth before it’s too late. On the other hand, if you’re too stuck in your head, at least you’ll be safe from saying or doing the wrong thing but your vibe will be a buzz kill. You have to remember, women are vastly different creatures than we are. One manifestation of this is they get either creeped out or the ick or offended very very very very very very easily. That’s why critical thinking and memorizing all the PUA techniques is just as important as inner game. Could be but I really don’t think so. Are you familiar with the red pill term “chameleon”? It’s a woman who spends enough time with a man to gain an understanding of the type of guy he is then she uses that information to adapt her persona in a way that he’s most likely to fall wildly in love with. It’s a strategy commonly used by women to marry wealthy men with the end goal of sucking them of everything they’re worth in court. If they can do it, why can’t we? Unless, maybe they really are measurably smarter than us on average so we can’t use the same trick on them! Part of it comes from that. Part of it comes from directly experiencing how true it all is when I go out and play the game. It’s not about controlling the situation. I trust myself just fine, it’s others I don’t trust because they continuously give me reason not to. Like bitching at me for being myself or being all hostile and butt hurt because a guy they don’t know dared to approach and talk to them like it’s no big deal or kicking me out because I said a harmless naughty joke to the wrong NPC. Most important of all is this right here. If there’s a way to beat 99% of the battle of getting laid I need to know how to do it right fucking NOW! I can’t go on any longer without having up close and personal female contact. So can you please expand on what you mean by “step to the girl”? I’d rather her step on me tbh.