Tiny Nietzsche

i'll be very honest, not afraid embarrassing - i'm 27 year old - what do i study? philosophy, M.A. - why i wanna quit? i found out that it's not me, i hardly think about it, i don't have a career aim about it, i always look at the clock everytime while i reading books & texts, i never have a flow state to it, it's just painful while on the lecture, 'what tf am i doing' pops up everytime lately, it's extremely hard to me to motivate myself - how long i've been studying? 1.5 years (it takes 2.5-3 years to graduate, so, around 1 year left) - why i started it at the first place? i chased after my ex, she studied psychology (i know it's stupid, i know), before that, i never think of taking a master degree at all, i also graduate with economics - what would i do if i quit? i love investment & economics, im building up my portfolio gradually many years ago, especially for incoming NFTs, Defi and web 3.0 - i keep thinking about it last 3-4 months, im just afraid that i would regret it - i'm also afraid that people might look down at me because of quitting (i know i shouldn't really care, but deep down, they way i am, i still do, u feel me right?) - tbfh, it tortures me, i wanna quit, it's not me - but i still think it's good to get a vary of opinion, because in the other hand, it probably benefit me in the future? idk, please help

- hi, i'm 27, one year to go to graduate, feel free to laugh & feel pathetic for how crazy i am - i just get in at first because a girl i was chasing, so i think it's a chance to get close to her (and it worked, but really not in the end - we broke up, i'm completely dumped) - it's like 80% for my girl / 20% for interesting in a degree (i study philosophy) - now the course itself is not that difficult, but i feel like im wasting my time every single day, it doesn't along with my purpose, i won't help me to get close to my dream, i have negative motivation to read it, as i said, i ended up here just because my crush back then but, in the other hand - *by leaving her unconsidered* should i keep it up and get a degree? or else i would lose my one and half year before for free (well, some may say it's not - i just managed to find out another one thing that is not right for me, so there's not 'what if' in later) - some say that it might benefit somehow later on (i'm quite at ease for what i'm studying, but i find it irrelevant to my dream, so i don't wanna wasting my time) TLDR: i went after a girl in grad school, now want to quit because she's gone, and i'm not into what i'm studying anymore TY !

when i'm lazy to do that particular thing how do i know whether i'm just really lazy or that thing is not right for me - i just don't truly like it i find it hard for me to distinct, which is something crucial (so i can quit or double down) . heard that for the thing we love, we do it without a resistance not sure this sentence is too radical or not . ty

did survey myself with these question for few times, found out that, with each thing, i say yes for 'if i die' but no for '$1billion' and vice versa (it's not so hard for yes/yes & no/no - that's clear whether i truly love/passionate with that thing or not) so, what's the different of this each question offer? and which guide should i use to assess the result?

mixed in category is okay, whichever u feel it's in your top 5 /TY

Okay, I see, I won't be close minded, I'm trying to understand.. (That we can transcend beyond biological limits?) But If that's so, How to higher my consciousness? Any clear, short & precise answers? DMT? (I don't have a negative view on psychedelics), Are there other method? TY!

- found in many vids that are about being attractive & being happy by oneself, u said 'u need none to be happy' - but does nature allow that? tons of research show that we might have all good things but if without deeply connected/meaningful relationship (mostly, a couple love, not friends & family), we won't be truly happy, it's just our nature - when loneliness kicks in, we just can't resist it, it affects our body & brain function automatically - and so many statement u say are unrealistic, we, human, aint that potent, we can't control how those serotonin/oxytocin/cortisol/etc emits (death instinct is also a good e.g.) - but in overall i do agree, but there must be some middle ground there, because your ideal superhuman is idealistic and impossible to be

sometimes i feel neutral to it, sometimes so passionate, sometimes boring.. someday i wake up and think about it, i feel so unmotivated to do it, someday i feel exciting to get it done.. i can't explain more it's really hard, thoughts & feeling ain't constant, this is my serious problem, because I can't manage to make a big decision (full focus to it or give it up) /TY ps. - i often forget it when i'm happy - i often go back to it when i'm sad (negative feeling really fuels) - in normal temperament, i find it hardly to motivate myself to do it - it hardly have a flow while doing it (sometimes i check a time as for stop doing it after completed a schedule time given) - it's my gift, my attitude, everyone around me my whole life say the same, i always excel it, im real good at it, it's quite effortless (i just pass an exam for master degree in this field without read a single book, it's all in my head) - i've tried to get over it, but it somehow calls to me - e.g. playing video games gives me happiness more than doing it MUCH - i usually find a reason (or excuse) to denigrate it (like: it won't make money/it's useless/it's outdated/... )

how do people know my previous topic, did they check my profile before reply (quite weird) or just remember me? /TY all for replies

Just watched Life Advice For Young People - Part 2.., That game is so teasing & captivating, I know It will surely consume my hours (at least 500 hours I suspect), and yes, I'm 25 already, Things in my life ain't yet together.. I'm really afraid I'd regret myself getting immersed to that game.. But yeah.. You know.. It's easy to than done, I really want to play it

- I'm 25, No Debt, No any responsibility - I have $5K, Choice are: 1. Buy a new gaming computer for Cyberpunk 2077 ($5K is used for 4K at 60FPS, Monitor included, If It's not 4K & 60FPS, I wouldn't play at all) 2. Invest to another thing I interest (It probably won't make money, But I really like it, It's also a skill) . . If I use money to 2, I wouldn't have for 1 . . I have to decide in this August, been talking to myself, can't settle it yet.. For that game, I really want to play it, I'm really hyped about it more than ever, I want to play it at day one of release, If I don't play it, I'm quite sure I would regret.. Besides, that gaming computer will also be for any upcoming games (for max setting in 3-4 years atleast) . But If I choose 1, I'm afraid I will regret too, I know, Wasting time on playing games gives nothing, As the time goes by.. Because the thing that I'm worrying about more than money spent is time, I guess approximately 1000 hrs I'd spend on it until i get bored (This doesn't even include another upcoming games in the future).. I'm 25 already.. Am I sleep walking to my life? Should I be more serious about my life? . But consider If I use that logic >> Game gives nothing <<, In fact, Everything in life is the same at someday of our life, You know what I mean, Nothing matters.. . Much appreciated for reading my problem.. I still don't have an answer for it.. Can I have your opinion?

listen to her reaction i definitely know her answer, it would kill me alive let go of the fantasy that you need her. how? the power of letting go right? the main problem is my brain don't listen, it deosn't understand, i know everything to end this but i just barely know it.. many say time will do its duty.. if i have a gut to let go (it lingers for 4 years because i never tried to let go seriously) ty much anyway

- TLDR: tbh, without her, i feel unhappy - im 25, male, been waiting for her for 4 years, our relationship is quite complex, its progress has been slowly developing over the years (because she hardly opens up for me) - (i used to have gf for 4 times before, im not a nerd who is new to love, but this one is whole different) - what should i do? how to rethink? my brain don't understand any messages, it needs her, it wants her

What need in you are you fulfulling? - Perhaps it's to love, to live along with it What makes you being you less prioritized than being what her needs you to be? - I don't know.. I'm afraid she would turn away from me, atleast i want to share & live together with her for some period of time, it's better than not having it at all

when it actually happens, it's hard to 'not let' that person be my everything i love her much, i can say she's the love of my life (she doesn't know), i'm not showing neediness & any lack though what going inside me is i start tying my personal goal in life with her i start worrying about my beloved job, my passionate plans whether how it look like for her? will it bring a great finance to support our relationship? should i change myself to this and that tbh, i'm somehow losing myself (and yes i know, this isn't quite right) i can't stop thinking about it for weeks already, because our relationship keep developing as the time goes by