SQAAD

No, don't stop meditating. Think about What do you wanna be teaching your brain? You want to teach it to continue meditating or doing whatever else you care about while feeling anxiety and other feelings. Do not stop what you are doing just because you feel terrible. This will teach your brain a bad habit. I can relate with the anxiety. Sometimes i get bombarded with painful painful feelings that are very distressing. But i do not allow them to rule my life. Your goal is to build very good mental fitness. Keep that in mind. You are training your mind to push through difficult emotions and etc while at the same time doing what you care about.

@Tim R But if non-duality is true then i was that guy in that gore video and i personally lived through that horrendous experience..... This is terrifying...................therefore it's not all good.

@Tim R ahahaha we are so doomed...

@Tim R I don't want to be that guy in the funkytown gore video or any other gore video for that matter. I don't want that level of pain in my awareness.

@Tim R There is noone to suffer and there was never someone. I Agree. But the excruciating staggering pain remains.....

Nice post.

@Tim R Excruciating pain is inherently bad in the sense that we don't like it. If i were to torture 100 people, all 100 would find it a terrible traumatic experience. Yes that can happen. I've seen people who were in much pain when they were being chopped off by some Mexican cartel who didn't make a lot of noises. You can tell when someone has accepted it or not. Emotional suffering is a lot different than physical pain. It is true that you can learn to accept horrendous situations like a concentration camp. But i doubt you can accept some types of excruciating pain that is just too much.... Even if you surrender to it, i think you will still suffer a lot. You will wish that you were never even born. Just imagining this level of brutality and pain makes me terrified.

@Leo Gura I don't buy this... The difference in sensation would remain because the sensation of pain is not caused by selfishness. Maybe it would make no difference for your survival if you were not selfish. But that's something else. The sensation is caused by a knife slowly cutting your fingers.

@Tim R The problem is that you don't have a choice or any power to enjoy torture or not. You are programmed by God to fear this stuff. We have no choice other than to be terrified about excuciating pain. That is the problem. Maybe God doesn't care. But we certainly do.

@Jakuchu I don't think pain & pleasure is a matter of preference. It's more like something biological. If i torture you, you don't like it no matter how selfless you are or what preferences you have.

@Leo Gura I don't see how selfishness affects the difference between torture and an ice-cream. Even if i was completely selfless, the sensations would not change.

@Leo Gura Whether the difference is imaginary or not, the bottom line is that there is a massive difference between getting your head chopped off and eating an ice-cream. And i don't see a way out of unimagining this difference.

@Jakuchu That's the problem right there... Always a person experiences the torture. Not God. That's why it is so horrendous.

@Tim R Just take a look at stuff like funkytown gore and you understand why not to do that.

@Leo Gura Could someone like Ramana Maharshi enjoy torture the same as an ice-cream then?

I also eat many eggs. Like 3 whole eggs per day. But no more than that. The cholesterol could be a problem for some people longer term. It's good to check your cholesterol levels and see how it affects you.

@gettoefl This issue is a tough pill to swallow.....

@Breakingthewall The issue of torture is the one i am struggling to accept or integrate the most. It's just too shocking. And the levels of brutality and pain are just unimaginably horrendous.... Whatever your worst dreams are , God can be all those things it seems. Makes you depressed sometimes. Nihilistic. Especially if you ever watch some gore videos like funkytown (this is the worst, don't watch it. There are commentaries on youtube about it though). Stuff like that leaves you mental scars. I miss the old times when non-duality was all fun and games for me. Now it has become more serious and dark... Sometimes i get dreams about torture. And it leaves me with a weird feeling of dread.......I am like ''why does this sh*t need to exist, screw you God'' lol

@iboughtleosbooklist Check out this video. I think you'll like it. Basically if your expectations are too high you're gonna suffer enormously. I've come to terms that life is sh*tty (and beautiful) and things won't go my way most of the time. There is enormous suffering in this world. That we can't hide under the rag.

@Tim R I think Reality if it wanted to, it would not be able to reject any part of itself. Like a cup can't stop being a cup. But that doesn't make the cup Love.

I would love to dissolve permanently all of reality and be for eternity in a state of nirvana like Buddha. No pain, No joy, no nothing. That would be the best. Like a deep sleep.

At 03:06:11 of this video Rupert talks about the nature of the finite mind. He claims that the only means we have to explore external Reality is through perception and thought. The finite mind filters everything it knows through its own limitations and the finite mind cannot perceive reality in the absence of those limitations. Leo what do you think about all of this? Is Rupert Spira God realised? I think your claim is that we have unmediated access to reality. Why Rupert is creating duality between perception and reality?

@Leo Gura Right now i am texting you. I believe that you are conscious over there in America. Every person i see i believe that they have their own vantage point. In a dream at night i don't believe that other entities have their own vantage point after i've woke up. Basically i believe that there are all these other entities who are also conscious like me. Also in a dream at night when i am talking to an elephant , i am not also conscious as the elephant. The elephant has no vantage point at all. But here if i were to talk to an elephant, i would assume that i am also the elephant at the same time (meaning that i have the vantage point of the elephant).

I don't feel comfortable with the prospect of being God. This is why if i trip hard , i get terrified. Because i don't wanna be everyone and everything. It's too much if you really think about it... Sometimes i find myself thinking what it would be like to live all sorts of different lives. Lives that are super miserable. And some super gruesome...and super super painful....... I don't know how a more experienced seeker or psychonaut has dealt with this issue. I cannot accept easily that i am God. I prefer just being a human who will die and then that's it, game over. Thats the more comfortable scenario...

I tend to agree with Rupert... Why is Leo kinda denying the vantage point of other people? If i am honest i don't know if other people are conscious or not at this moment. I can only be sure of what is in my direct experience. But in this way i cannot deny or confirm the vantage point of someone else..