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I've heard about watching porn while on Psychedelics. But what about watching graphic content while high on Psychedelics?? Is this a wise decision or it will mess up with your mind? Is it better and more convenient to avoid looking at the super nasty part of God and act like it doesn't even exist ? I am a very strong minded person. I can handle a lot. Also my biggest fear is torture and excruciating pain. I feel like God is pushing me towards conquering this fear. This fear is literally my worst nightmare. Its what I hate the most. Personally I haven't tried this yet. Any opinions?

@Vincent S Thank you. I am not willing to experience all these things per say But.. It's very hard to turn my back on these things and not acknowledge them knowing that I will have to live through them one day.. You see, its very personal for me.. The nightmares of God are the challenge of existence. My life now is relatively easy but I cannot cling to that. I need to acknowledge everything.

@Phoenix11 Yes I agree. Its good to be aware of how terrible things can become. It gives you a certain perspective. Most people are just in denial, living inside a comfortable constructed bubble. They have no connection to what is really going on in this planet. I watch a channel on YouTube called Disturbed Reality. It has commentaries of cartel executions and etc. Gore is basically any act of serious physical harm and torture that is very very gnarly. A husband hitting very seriously his wife is considered gore too.

@Benton It is one thing to accept the idea of beheading and another thing to accept the actual beheading. I am just curious of what I will have to endure as God. I'm just having a preview of the nightmares that are coming ahead in one of next possible incarnations. This gives me an existential terror that is addictive like a drug sometimes. Hard to explain.. I am already way more comfortable with the nasty parts of God just by facing what is. You don't have to necessarily watch graphic content. A commentary is OK too.

@Ima Freeman @Ima Freeman Thank you for your kind words. Yes you are right. There is a cost to everything. Sometimes I feel very very emotionally disturbed after having watched nasty things online. That's why I avoid watching actual gore videos . I just stick to commentaries nowadays. Its hard to explain but these gore topics attract me in some weird way. I always regret watching these commentaries but for some reason I always come back to them lol. I want to know what X person has endured so I can know what I will have to endure lol. If it wasn't for non duality i would not care that much. Maybe it's something I have to let go eventually. God's Love is truly horrifying. It's too much too handle for a human being.. Thats what I'm having trouble accepting and being OK with.. Living through the worst possible experiences is the whole challenge of existence in a nutshell. Sometimes I even feel nice that all these horrific things exist. It makes me appreciate the scope of life more. Also the horror, awe and shock you feel has a sweet taste to it sometimes.

I respect Leo's body of work but I believe he is very wrong about Solipsism. He may change his opinion few years after. I think all this solipsism talk is a mental game. Leo's mind is very philosophical and maybe that creates some problems for him. Solipsism goes contrary to our knowing of how things are. When I go outside of my room, I know my room still exists. I know that when I go inside my apartment I will definitely enter again my room. Hope that makes sense. I can be very rigid and play this game that no it doesn't exist unless it's in my awareness but I think this is taking things too much on the wrong side. Only what Is in my awareness exists seems like another dogma to me. https://youtu.be/a2anz9QKD7Y

@Vincent S I disagree man. First of all it is not a fetish of mine. Let me explain. I could focus on all the 'positive' aspects of God but what is the point?? That is easy. Its easy to love being a millionaire and living through the best kind of lives. That stuff is easy and a 5 year old child can accept easily. It is the stuff that destroys your notion of how good the world is that is very challenging to embrace. It is the stuff that makes you question God's design and your reasons for even living. There are stuff out there that when you see, it annihilates all your notions about how Good reality is. That is why I'm Interested in the hard topics. I do not care if in the next life I am born a millionaire. That stuff doesn't disturb me. What disturbes me, is the thought of living through the worst possible lives. This is just me getting comfortable with God's nightmares. I do not focus on the nightmares all the time. I keep a balance. But I cannot live acting like the nightmares don't even exist. For me, I am working through all these existential fears by acknowledging the nightmares. That is my fetish you could say. I imagine living through the most difficult nightmares. I cannot do otherwise. Sometimes it is very challenging. The goal is accepting and integrating the totality of what God is. And as I said before there is not integration to be done for the stuff that is easy and comfortable. Basically my mind is trying to prepare for the nightmares in some way. That is the best way I can put it.

@Vincent S That is not my experience but I am open to this possibility. If I had free will, my life would be very different right now.

@Phoenix11 That is willful ignorance. It's like your neighbor is having a hard time and you acting like nothing has happened just so your peace is not disturbed. That describes the lives of most people. And explains why there is so much evil in the world. Simply because most people do not care and are not bothered to care..

@Adodd Worst idea maybe in terms of Survival and maintaining your petty emotionally comfortable life. In terms of directly looking at the worst parts of God's face, and bathing in Truth, it is a brilliant idea. The only way you can maintain your comfortable existence is by denying the totality of what God is. If the average person was fully conscious all the time of what God truly is, he would end up in a mental asylum.

Solipsism is pure non sense. Rupert agrees. Or maybe Rupert Spira, a 40 plus years spiritual practitioner is not ready for the Highest Teachings Also having one experience at a time doesn't seem like Infinity to me.

Nice Post. But I highly doubt others are empty suits. Why God couldn't live simultaneously all possible lives? Who limits God to one life per time?? Why can't there be anything outside my Consciousness? (like another life)

Awakening is Just another ego trip for the ego I believe. It's really no different from a powerlifter who wants to lift the heaviest weight possible. Really no different from a bodybuilder who wants the best physique. Really no different from a math person who wants to reach the highest levels of math. It's all just an ego game so you can say 'hey look at me, how great and special I am compared to all others'. Ego always overrides everything. I see awakening being another ego trip and those who pursue it displaying narcissistic characteristics more and more. Leo is turning into the Conor Mcgregor of spirituality for example. Correct me if I'm wrong.

@Nadosa This is such a nonsensical post... I bet a great meditator would have greater and deeper trips than a normie. What are you suggesting exactly? Like tripping for eternity is sustainable. Plus you always come down.

@Thought Art Meditation is a great skill to have. It does not matter if it will awaken you or not.Because It definitely makes your life a lot better. Meditation is the best thing I've ever done for myself. I have peace of mind like never before after 5 years of meditation. And it only gets better with time.

Leo is abusing his power on this forum and is turning this thing into a monarchy. First by watching private messages and now by demoting and banning people who don't fit his square. I've been asking serious questions lately and instead of getting serious replies I get insulted, threatened of ban and my threads closed. Nice treatment.. Very nice... I was thinking that Awakening was supposed to make you a nicer person. But Leo's empathy levels recently have been very very concerning. Things are only gonna get much worse it seems. Just watch what happens the next months.

@Knowledge Hoarder God wants me to do whatever I am doing. Its not my will. It's God's will always. Since I have 0 free will as an ego.

@roopepa I think this isn't the case. Because God has a desire. If God has no desire then why do I even exist.

@Knowledge Hoarder It's a love - hate relationship towards it. I just cannot imagine anything worse and that's why I am attracted to it. It's super interesting and fascinating for me. Just the mere thought of living through it gives me shakes. Also it seems like a part of me would wanna experience it. I know it sounds twisted. Yes I know what you mean lol. Fortunately I don't have nightmares about it. But few weeks ago I saw the worst nightmare of all time. I was somewhere without control of my body. And a bunch of people near me where being dismembered. And then it was my time. I wasn't scared. But I just was like 'why tf does this nasty bs exists?' lol it was surreal. I guess God has a fine taste. Also being fully awakened is not good for survival either i think.

@Cykaaaa Yes I mean fear of living through a brutal torture. I've thought about doing visualisation about it but I am afraid of negatively programming my mind.. Also I think that no matter what I do I cannot escape the terrible nature of torture. Its just is awful. Terrifyingly awful and you cannot manipulate your way out of it. You are in for the ride of your life lol.

@roopepa This is an interesting opinion. I just thought we should conquer our fears.

Leo claims he is awake and everybody else is not. Also he believes that actualized.org was his journey towards becoming the most conscious person on the universe. He thinks he is more conscious than anybody else from what I understand. I've became really concerned after his last blog video. Also I am thinking that maybe I am doing more harm to myself by following Leo all these years. The problem is that I have developed an attachment to Leo's videos all these years. He is the person who I have spent the most time watching online. His videos are super long so that makes sense. Its hard to let that attachment go. I know other users share the same opinions. Maybe psychedelics are causing some sort of brain damage to Leo's mind. I've noticed some differences in his behaviour. There are many psychedelics that have not been properly researched. 5meo dipt causes brain damage for example. Lastly his solipsism is non sense unless he can claim that he does not exist and has no personal subjective experience. Because I clearly exist right now having an experience and nobody can deny that.

@Inliytened1 Do you exist or not? Also thank you for your explanations. I appreciate your effort.

@Dayo You do not know what I am doing or not dude. This is a scientific investigation I am doing. Do you exist or not?

@Inliytened1 Do you exist or not? You are not just a figment of my imagination. If that is the case then I am talking to nobody? What about your experiences? What about Leo's experiences? They do not exist??? This is absurd. So if I was to kill you, wouldn't I also experience the murder from your perspective? Is that what you are suggesting. What about God being all others??